Lord Bwyra

Back in the dungeon. Hell. I want to surrender to God but there are demons in my skeleton that feel like everything is burning. I need to commit to liberation from all this pain and obsessive behavior. I need to treat my body as the temple it is. And serve others with light and love. These are the last words of this dying avatar that was never meant to be. Starting next month I will start reading the bible. Going to the gym. Eating vegetables. Quit drinking and porn and coffee and greed and hatred. This will be the most difficult thing I have ever done. But Jesus was nailed to a fucking cross and left their to rot. The cross is a symbol of unity, where two lines join and become one. Jesus is a symbol of sacrifice, of the the suffering Buddha talked about. Jesus = Buddha Same dude. This is my path. I'm very sorry to have caused you confusion and wasted your time with my angry rants. Sorry Leo. I will leave your community in peace and wish you all the best. Take care my brothers and sisters. One day we shall meet again

No it's not at all. Where are the studies? In fact, most of this stuff has been put in the "bunk" category ages ago eg. subconscious mind (there's no such thing). Here read this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-help#Criticism It seems most of the people including you and your guru suffer from science illiteracy. Instead of actually engaging with ideas, all kinds of nonsense is spouted and taken for granted just because some guy said so in a book, as if it is the holy grail of truth. LOL As do you my friend. I'm open to being proved wrong, are you? Just don't forget the saying: Keep an open mind but not so open that your brain falls out. You are right about me that I do get frustrated (i have a nerve injury on my neck/arm and it's a tricky one to heal and because of this i'm supposed to "take it easy" this year) but I would like to take your analogy a little further. This whole non-field of personal development (that is just a marketing con term btw) is not about lighting that joint either. It's about selling products and worthless ideas to other bums about how to light joints, figuring out one's "life purpose" to light that joint and other wishy washy concepts that actually don't help anyone light the join except dream about it. That is, assuming that you even have to light the joint! Why not just light the joint? Or even better, throw away the joint and dance to make a buck or two to start getting out of the street life. Go to the library. Swim to a warmer location and at least then you are clean. Or enjoy your freedom as a bum Never again. I tried to listen to them in podcast form from the beginning but after about 50 episodes i couldn't go on anymore. Although I do like his more recent videos about more abstract concepts which is why I think Leo should drop all the life purpose crap. 3 times? Wow. You must be really enlightened. You certainly cracked that code (i'm still curious what you mean by that) Yes, practise, mastery, process is all great. But i'm pretty sure the kung-fu guy doesn't spend time "analyzing in detail everything he did". That's the useless part and that is my point! He comes home and makes rice and fucks his wife and goes to sleep on his bamboo mat. Just do the work and skip all this mental masturbation bullshit. Joseph why are you making it seem as if I don't believe we should do anything? Where did that come from? Are you not able or willing to engage in a constructive dialogue about certain concepts that someone might not just adhere to by default or because you link to 10 videos where some madman is screaming at us? I really thought you were brighter than that. It seems your peaceful manner comes with the conditions of believing in what you say is true just because you say so. Sorry, not good enough for me. I'd rather take a more vile and aggressive Joseph if it means he will stop talking shit. Any day. Goals are worthless and will get you nowhere. Read this for a different perspective because it seems you have closed your ears to what I am talking about (which is oddly something you accuse me of): http://jamesclear.com/goals-systems Another falsity that the "personal development" field loves to say. In fact, most things are not possible for most people. No matter how many times you tell yourself it is or how many times you watch Leo's videos. I think it's a pretty dumb strategy. Focus on systems instead, and process. No goals. No purpose. You don't need to answer a 100 questions or determine your values. Those don't mean shit. That is just time spent NOT doing what you're actually supposed to be doing. Then you are free from focusing on things that are not in your control and ironically enough you are open to more opportunities that may come your way. Joseph, I've been playing guitar, piano and singing since I was 6 years old (almost 30 years and way past 10,000 hours). There have been times when those 5-6 hour practise sessions (alone, living as a recluse for 6-8 months, preparing for a recording or performance) were NOT that fun. I didn't do it for fun though because I knew how rewarding it would be to be able to impress the girls with my skills Again, this tells me that you and most of the "life purpose" guys don't really even know what mastery is. Or you forget it really quick because you are not living it. I know Leo mentions this in the course so I think he understands this quite well. And Leonard's MASTERY book is a masterpiece indeed! I'm surprised that you don't get this yet. This is not about excitement or fun. It's about something much higher. Fuck society. I don't give a shit about society. Humanity is a cancer and they've turned the earth pretty much into a wasteland or at least the places they've conquered. I've seen the world and all the beautiful places that have been ruined with resorts so humans can go there for vacation. Any time people have "good news" and say they are having children, my heart weeps for earth. I hate children. When you are ready for mastery, you won't care no longer about society. There's something much higher than that. I call it THE PROCESS. This is actually what the eastern masters were talking about. Purpose is a close-minded concept that comes from christianity and other western capitalistic idealogies. Forget about the rewards and the money and all that. Just focus on process, create a system that requires you to actually do something besides watching youtube all day and reading books that never get anybody anywhere. Live the dream and stop dreaming about a life you don't have. Right here, right now. That's the only thing there is. Let the process flow and enjoy whatever fruits may come. Do what is required. Become the person you want to be. BEING over doing or having. If the fruits don't come, the process itself is the highest reward so it will be okay anyway. That's why many great artists died and didn't become famous until much after their death eg. like Jesus, Buddha, Townes Van Zandt, Van Gogh, and very possibly, myself after the dust has settled and you guys know who is really behind these words. I think it's healthy for any community to have someone who ensures that the infrastructure is strong enough to possibly uphold future attack. I don't know if I'm that someone or if I am that future attack. Maybe a little of both. I'm still finding my place in this forsaken planet. Even if it's just as an exercise of chewing on some alternative ideas and perspectives. I'm sure it's possible to find a bridge between these two lines of thinking between process vs purpose or personal-development vs "just do it and skip all the bullshit" so that everyone is happy. We can do that when we're all tripping in Peru with our spirit animals ;D That said, we all have to be willing to have a civil conversation about our adopted views with those who don't necessarily "see the light" and don't respond well to arguing from the fallacy of default position. Not all of us want to do that, I get that. We talked about this before Joseph. About the judgement of not judging others. Or the wrongness of accusing others of just wanting to be right. Remember? But I'm a philosopher and a poet. That's what I love more than anything. I love playing with ideas and language and concepts to really see what is what. This is more valuable than just being a passive consumer of other people's thoughts because it pulls us into the process. Even if I'm wrong, I need to fully understand where and how and even why. This has nothing to do with ego or who is more advanced than whom or who figured what out in high school already. That does not invite healthy "debating" or conversation or even collective contemplation. Those are just things that arrogant, close-minded people like to say and tactics to keep people quiet. Leo does that a lot and it's quite alarming considering he has a good sized following (and how little awareness he has of what he's doing). That's probably why you can't find any material online of him having a conversation with anyone bare a few interviews with some quacks. Nobody wants to talk to someone who puts themselves up on an imaginary pedestal who doesn't want any of their ideas questioned. I've tried to engage with Leo several times on these forums during the last month since I came here and most of them usually end with "you guys don't get this stuff at all" or "i figured that out a long time ago" or some other dismissive gesture that prevents him from actually having to explore his superficial ideas in any kind of serious way. It's easy to just hit the bong and think that you understand shit that you don't. This is about seeing what is actually so and what is not so. And since we are here, it's also about communicating with other people who are somewhere along the path, looking for answers or just wants to trade some war stories with other soldiers. I fear that not many people here wants to do that which is why I probably won't be posting here much longer. I'm sure I can find some other communities in the internet jungle who actually want to talk about this shit and not just prey to false gods. Or even better, close the computer and go out into the real world. You guys can go back to worshipping your gurus and living in your bubbles. And getting nowhere. If you feel insulted by that an identify yourself as "you guys", then I think you have a problem that needs some quality time with that eternal companion in your head.

Bullshit. Life purpose is a complete waste of time and no serious artist or innovator gives a shit about it. This is a concept for ordinary losers who have nothing better to do than be obsessed with themselves and read some pseudo-scientific new age wuwuu nonsense online to make their boredom with life feel more soothing. If you want to create something, then just create something and skip all the unnecessary mental masturbatory procrastination steps. Focus on: systems instead of goals. process instead of purpose. growth mindset instead of fixed mindset.

Oh and here's also and blog post about this that I came across some time ago that you might find interesting: https://www.dangerandplay.com/2014/07/22/music-you-listen-to-personality/

This is my favorite topic in the world. And I'm glad you asked this. I'm also a professional musician and have been obsessed with everything music since I was 5 years old. In fact there's a great book written on this: The Secret Power of Music which I highly recommend to get a more big picture view of what music really is and where it comes from and how it has evolved. There are chapters about the original "om" sound from India and then goes to describe more modern styles of classical, avant-garde, jazz, blues, pop, etc. Although I don't share the author's extreme views on this (and the book was also written in the 80s) but his thesis is interesting. According to the author, pop culture/music has been a pretty accurate reflection of the culture and where humanity is at in terms of spiritual progress. Yes and no... that's a big topic. He favors Bach and composers who write from a place of beauty/God and disdains pretty much anything from 1900 and forwards. LOL I personally love pop music (by which i mean pretty much all modern styles) and I'm fascinated with how it has evolved and integrated different styles. I also went through different phases during my life where I was into all kinds of crazy shit. **** It's important to develop an awareness in our actions and desires. Not just listen to music on a surface level or to escape or to re-affirm existing identities. I have always found questionable the practice of listening to just one style or genre of music. And denying or neglecting other forms. This is just pure ego (the bad kind). Even one genre is so broad that I find it's usually 99% garbage and 1% good. This goes for metal, classical, blues, jazz, fusion, techno, trance, mainstream pop, folk, world, etc. Music is music. Art is art. What does that mean? Rhythm. Melody. Harmony. Poetry (words). Craftsmanship. Sound. Emotion. Vibe. Groove. Expression. Transcendence. Pain. Joy. What exactly do you like about a certain piece of music? Start listening to it deeper than before. It can become a meditation. Are the band playing off each other and taking the song higher (like Stairway To Heaven)? Do you like the cold electronic atmosphere of a Brian Eno ambient piece? Maybe you love the bassline in an outro of a Coldplay song (they are masters of creating great outros)? Or maybe just the raw intensity and energy of a song (Slayer's "Disciple") that could propel a jet? Have you ever listened to Metallica's "And Justice For All" album on LSD? I have... Not a pleasant experience! lol I had to turn it off after a few minutes of "Blackened" (the first track)... lol I felt like my ego was swallowing me and the music became a blackhole of eternal ear fucking. So much anger and darkness there and you can really feel it when you get deep into it. We attract and love what we are deep inside. If you want anger and intense energy, then that will feel good. If you want beauty and peace, not so much. I think there are times for both. Perhaps we all need a little drunken Jack Daniels sex with some dirty slut, fucking to the hypnotic machine gun riffs of Metallica's "One" in a sleezy motel in the middle of a desert somewhere every now and again Or maybe not! Depends what you're into... But I love 80s Metallica. Yet they were really angry guys and fucked up. But they transcended that. You can feel that with some artists how music keeps them sane and not killing others. That is a beautiful thing and I think that process deserves recognition. Even channelling anger into something as controlled and creative as music can be a very beautiful thing. That is in essence a spiritual process. Metallica's singer is now married with kids and sober. Yeah his music kinda sucks now but in some ways he got a little bit free (with the success of his band). In other ways he's become trapped in his own creation of "the singer from Metallica" and his art has suffered for that. Same with the Rolling Stones guys who haven't created anything to the standards of their 60s-70s stuff when they were so high that they probably don't even remember it. Fuck, don't get me started on this shit. I could go on forever. But it's a great question and can be broadened out to mass entertainment in general. What does it say about our society that shows like Breaking Bad are so powerful? Sure that show is very violent and dark and dramatic. It's also a great story and a cautionary tale. I get a lot out of these kinds of shows. They are inspiring. A lot of emotional depth and heavy social criticism considering we are rooting for an anti-hero??!!? Yes it's entertainment too and perhaps overly dramatic in how such incredible events play out in such a small time frame. Unrealistic? Perhaps, I don't know. ******* All art is a form of finding/identifying beauty where there is great suffering and even sorrow. Great artists are able to take that process of transcendence from a wide variety of sources and create something new that really connects with many people. They are able to access some place that you can only get to with the experience of their creation. They become Gods. And we feel less alone in this universe that might feel alone also in a place where billions of universes exist. We are all artists if we choose to become conscious of that and live as creators instead of victims. We are Creating our lives. We are transcending OUR suffering and making sense of it. Maybe this comforts us. And if we are comforted, perhaps others will be too. Humans respond to universal values: Beauty, truth, love, community, etc. Even the metal guys who dress up in all that silly leather and makeup and darkness are secretly yearning for love and unity with God. They feel connected when they listen to their identities being accepted, even if it's for that 3-4 minutes. They meet friends into the same shit, go to shows, dress the part, etc. Community. Tribe mentality. Same as the hipsters or jazz nerds or classical snobs. Same shit, different underwear. Just be careful, this can all be a trap. You have to be able to live without music and in total silence for 1-2 months. Otherwise it's an addiction and will just feed the hungry ghost within. Use music as a form of celebration of life and all it's incredible colors and scents and sounds. Listen to ALL kinds of music. Learn to appreciate things that you don't necessarily like. Find the essence of the song you love and understand it, study it, meditate with it, masturbate to it. Take a shit on it and drink your own cum with it. Is Justin Bieber completely bullshit? Or is music his salvation and a way to give value to millions of teenagers around the world who scream and screech at the thought of him? What the fuck is going on there? Beatlemania, Backstreet Boys, Michael Jackson, etc... Why are these Norwegians worshipping the devil and killing each other when they live in such a great place? Were they ass fucked as children or something and that creates a cult??? What the fuck is going on there. People want their Gods so they can have someone to worship and make them feel that life is not just a fucking ant factory that repeats for 100 years until you drop dread and everyone has a party for you but you can't make it so they cry. Although such lyrics might sound hollow and vain on the surface... Maybe they are not what they seem. These could also be a desperate cry to reunite with the beloved (god, truth, love, etc). They are just masquerading as teenage disneyland fairytale lovestories, that endless cycle most people go through again and again. Most people never mature from that. Kids raising kids. We fall in love with someone... why? Because everyone is looking for the same thing. Freedom. Liberation. Enlightenement = to surrender to light and let yourself shine. They try to find it through drugs and fucking and food and movies and christmas and jesus and all that bullshit. If you have been put in a microwave when you were 2, and were not loved, you will do whatever it takes to find that love. Heroin? The easiest way. Addicted for life. To love. You will sell your grandma to feel that love. Whatever it takes. ******** Do not be fooled by what you think your emotions mean and who you think you are and what you think others are. We are much much much more than that. As i said, we are all artists, creators. Gods and Goddesses. Admiring our creations and trying to outwit each other and the devils in our black iron hearts. But like monkeys who spend 4 hours in the wild foraging and hunting... you know what they do for the rest of the day when not sleeping? Annoying each other. So that's why we fiddle with our balls and scratch our vaginas all day and smelling our fingers, reading shit online and wanting more out of life and dreaming of life in paradise. ***** I see many people on these forums and in everyday life being stuck as the person they are. Yet they want things that require them to be somebody they are not. People want more freedom and happiness and joy and money and love. They want all this change but they don't want to change. So they keep listening to the same music and liking the same things they used to like. They dress the same. They hold on to their ideas and beliefs about who they think they are and what annoys them. How many times do you do that every day? It's all a bullshit world you have created in your head to feel safe and comfortable. The problem is that you created it as a default mechanism before you were conscious enough to make your own decisions. You are a product. A domisticated animal. Free range human. You're welcome to leave the herd and step out into the wilderness. You want that dont you? It excites you. It makes your pussy wet and your dick hard. But you are afraid of freedom. ******* Strip yourself of all identity and create a person who has abundance of the things you want. This transformation will be painful. But worth it. Otherwise you are just left around wondering and in this eternal state of purgatory like all the 99.99999% humans who were to scared to change and died mediocre. Leo created his Life Purpose course to help you break free. There are books and people and art who will help you also if you start using them for that and seeking out the great works of history. You have to find what you really value in life and create a meaningful life around that. That's why you are here. You are still reading this crazy post of mine that just came out of me like a hungry dinosaur uncaged. ****** Become Who You Really Are. That's the only God I serve. Hence my profile name

i feel better than i have in a long time One thing that is essential for people like me who can fall into those dark holes of infinity Have a daily spiritual practise! Ideal is twice per day and it has to be at the same time and consistent meaning every day! (12 hours apart works good because then you prevent those negative cycles from happening or break them if they begin) so for example 7.00am (morning) 19.00pm (evening) and you can just start with morning and then add evening later. 5 tibetans are a great beginning yoga routine and i would add meditation to that as well so you are doing as many minutes of meditation as the repetitions (so 5 reps equals 5 mins meditation after although i personally do much more because I am more experienced with meditation... that said, sometimes it's good to back off which is something i am considering doing next month and just getting humble and being patient to prevent not falling off the edge too quickly!) When you get to 21 repetitions and minutes [MORNING] Then you can start building evening practise as well. so from... 7-8am (spiritual practise, fuck you world i'm busy) and 19-20pm (spiritual practise, fuck you world i'm busy) Also it's important to read spiritual books because they give us the wisdom of the masters who came before us... so Power of Now, New Earth, Buddha, Ramakrishna, Kundalini, yoga, tantra, Osho, Krishnamurti, Alan Watts, etc, etc... or watch lectures on youtube, dharma talks, etc... but i think books are better because they can be read anywhere and you're not on the fucking internet staring at a screen So include that as well in your 1 hour (or whatever you start with): ★ 5tibetans (or other form of yoga but something physical to get the body breathing and relaxed) 3-21mins ★ meditation 3-21 mins ★ spiritual study (3-21mins) Total = 9 - 63mins LOL (the numbers are arbitrary, i doubt it will make much difference if it is 19-20-21... feel free to go further too if you want) This is an ongoing journey and it gets us nowhere when we start and then stop and always have to start from the beginning again and again (i have made this mistake many times and often given up, got depressed, back to my old addictions and negative people and habits, etc) This is as important as anything in life. It's inner wealth. It's nutrition for the mind and soul. That 1-2 hours each day (or 5 mins to start with) you switch off all the bullshit and go back to being just a perfect being of light and energy and cleanliness. No matter where you are, who you are, how fucked up things get or even how good things get. World war 3? Fuck you i'm doing my practise now. Excuse me dear guests, i have to go practice now for an hour but you're welcome to join me and if not, make yourselves at home Sorry if you think this is bullshit. But for me this is maybe the most important thing in life (even more than music, money and pussy haha). And it's free You can even start with 1rep x 5T = 1min x M = 1min x SS I think that can be a math formula for spiritual practise) And increase every week.... after 4-5 months you are up to max and in one year you have morning and evening practise sorted. Boom! That's a good fundamental level. And then you can start increasing it, going deeper, retreats, more focused practise and harder poses that challenge the breath and your edge of comfort, etc. So not only is this a good spiritual practise, it's also great for fitness, flexibility, strength, etc. They are all part of the path of liberation. Never make the mistake of thinking these things are somehow separate. Eventually your whole life is one big spiritual practise 24/7/52/365 and you will use the insights that WILL come (guaranteed if you stick with it) and they will bleed into your day. Your kundalini energy will release and light you up. But that takes time because most of us are so blocked. Our sexual energy is often stuck in the cock/balls/vagina/anus regions. We need to learn how to release that and not just shoot it out of our holes but i mean into the body. I think i will turn the ideas in this post into a book or a course or something for other fuckups like me who are addicted to "getting high". In fact this was an email i wrote to a friend earlier this morning who has been going through some dark times. If this message has reached you, we are okay. Like that song goes: lights will guide you home

I’m gonna bow out of this conversation for now as I feel I have nothing further to contribute at this time but look forward to seeing you elsewhere on the forums or reading the discussion on this thread if it continues. Funny how the title of Leo’s thread can be kind of interpreted in different ways now. Not sure if that was intentional or not. Then again, perhaps we are all channeling something greater than ourselves in everything we do, say or write or create. We are all striving not just to understand all THIS but to share our understanding or lack of it with each other as well. I'm sure our journeys and ideas will continue to evolve.

@Leo Gura But Leo the same could be said to you and that has been my point on this thread. Yet you fail too admit this and this makes you look very arrogant and extremely unenligthened. And hence why I think you are just tripping and basking in the afterglow You seem to think you have a monopoly on "direct consciousness of the absolute nature of reality". NEWSFLASH: you don't and never will. Weak idiots will not see that because they just want some leader to tell them how to live without questioning anything (99% of people are like that). Just because you say something doesn't make it so. No matter how many times you repeat or are convinced of it yourself. You are not an authority on these topics, nobody is. Whether a monk does this for 20-30 years, doesn't mean shit. Right now we are using words to communicate with each other. Ultimately they will always be just fingers pointing at the moon (at best) and never the moon itself. And you are also not the only one to have experimented with psychedelics. I've done them quite a lot! And so have others on this thread. I've come across many people who get overly-excited when they experience all that deep shit and then eventually it wears off. They think psychedelics help them but ultimately they don't do shit. Just entertainment. Yes it can inspire but it's all a lie. Not the real thing. And when the drug wears off you are left with "sometimes i feel the high on my walks", etc. You are not enlightened, if you were, you wouldn't be communicating so defensively. Once again, you keep on separating yourself from others or "you guys" and this appears that you have got drunk on your own kool-aid. This is very unbecoming of you. Yes because your ego as Leo Gura the spiritual sage is now under enormous threat when even his followers stop taking him seriously. He starts regretting his moves and forgets that this was never about him. Fear not though friend because YOU don't matter. The true spiritual aspirants are here for much deeper reasons than following some guru. There are no gurus. "If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him." We are here for truth. At least I am

@Hardkill You are also a pathological liar. That's your biggest problem. However, like all problems, you can turn it into a challenge that can be overcome. Stop with the self-pity, nobody cares. You are alive and breathing. You are living a life of luxury that even kings dreamed of hundreds of years ago. This whole discussion I have been on your side all along. But the self-actualized version of you. We are actually great friends and brothers deep in that black heart of yours but you refuse to see that and acknowledge it because you have been possessed by some evil ugly force and you continue to feed that monster. I still believe in you and always will even if you don't and just think I'm attacking you for my own pleasure (although I admit, that's part of my motivation too). We can help you get liberated from this madness but not until you actually want it and are ready to do the work required. Until then, expect to feel like shit and complain and not get anywhere with anything. Depression is a choice. Nothing more, nothing less. Just like whatever other identity you CHOOSE to inhabit. The question is: who do you really want to be? Maybe you can start with that if you are really serious about self-actualization (presuming that's why you came here) like everyone else on THIS forum. I'm sure there are other forums for people who just want to bitch and moan and do nothing about it. This ain't it!!

@Joseph Maynor Be careful you don't fall in to your own traps my friend. In your previous to last post on this thread you cautioned to be weary of judgement. But do you not see that all language and thought is a form of judgement? So you are judging the act of judgement. This is a futile exercise. Completely pointless. And now you are talking about the need to be right all the time which is of course problematic because you are also attempting to be right about letting go of the need to be right all the time. It's another one of those things that is just inherent in conversation. Everyone wants to be right. That's why they are seeking truth. But as i suggested in an earlier post, it would perhaps be beneficial to somehow come together more in the way we converse so this being right can happen together, on a more collective level. Yet it's hard to do that when we are strangers online. We don't really know each other's views enough yet to be able to do that fruitfully i'm afraid. That said, my posts on this thread have not really been about me and my need to be right and prove someone wrong. They may come across that way but that is not my intent. I have just noticed that some people claim to believe stuff yet they don't necessarily really believe what they say they believe or know what they think they know. Of course I could be wrong about that but I at least want to find out. I have a very sensitive bullshit detector and when it goes off, I have to put my inquirer helmet on and start asking some serious questions. One thing that sets it off is when people start talking about being anti-rationalist or that everything is a hallucination and we can't really know anything about reality. I just don't think this is correct. And I don't think they really do either, they just think they do because they are caught up in their own ego bullshit (and they think they aren't). I respect Leo as a thinker and I think his videos and courses are great. I've bought everything so far and will probably continue to support him because I l just like what he does and the care he puts into it. I can't think of anyone else in the personal development field who's really pushing the boundaries like he is and lets himself be questioned like this without losing it. So I hope he's cool with that. It's not about him or me or you. It's about the ideas we exchange. Do they have merit? Lets talk about it and find out. And why not challenge each other when we are not in full agreement or understanding. Just like "real eyes" challenged me earlier about the logical fallacy thing, which was interesting because I had to go back to see what I wrote and argue my case. If i would've seen the fallacy (i still don't), i would've admitted it and that's that. I'm not always perfect in the way I conduct myself and sometimes I say things that I regret. And I'm happy to admit when I'm wrong when I am or if I suddenly understand something that I may have overlooked. Joseph I generally like your posts and I really admire how peacefully you engage with everyone here. I also subscribed to your youtube channel awhile ago so keep up the good work. Some people think Leo is an authority figure and everything he says is holy. I don't. Truth is the only authority and we all serve that whether we like it or not.

Leo, I've taken psychedelics and I know what it means to encounter and experience yourself as God the creator of reality. And sometimes when I walk around or meditate, I feel the same. You are completely right, once you experience this stuff, you never forget. But extrapolating from that all that nonsense about reality being a hallucination is nothing but your own subjective reasoning that you probably read somewhere and decided to be true for you. The problem is that it's difficult to verify. Your certainty makes you look very foolish and amateurish. No they are not. There actually is a standard and it's called science. Yes, it comes with an assumption that there is an objective reality we can measure and yes you can argue with that assumption but please don't think you are the first one to do so. And I insist that you just say what you say but at the end of the day you do rely on those same assumptions. The hallucination viewpoint is cute and fluffy but nobody ever practices it. Just a bunch of new age nonsense and entertainment. At the end of the day, you use your rational brain to make sense of all these experiences you have. You get sad when the trip is over and it's back to being Leo the self help guy. Sometimes you walk around and you remember again. But it never lasts. Everything is temporary. I'm really curious what you mean by that and why you have this need to put as all in a group when we are just different people on different parts of the path. Does that make your feel more enlightened? Because i think you still sound like a guy who tried dmt a few times and got a little too excited (based on the way you describe your experiences and how certain you are about your interpretation of such events). I've done the drugs Leo I know what you are talking about. I speak the language. I've been in tears at how fucking incredible everything was. And as an pro artist, I've had many moments where i've experienced it without the drugs too. They come and go. But this doesn't mean I trust my own experience as a way of understanding the world around me. No doubt it can be very helpful for understanding our own mind and I do suggest everyone experiences a good trip now or then. It can certainly point us in the right direction regarding some personal issues. Just don't expect any serious thinkers who actually use their own brain to take you seriously when your only argument is "guys, there is no reality, it was all bullshit all along, this is all just a hallucination, don't underestimate the significance of this" lol Sorry but those words are nothing new. I honestly think you trust your own experiences way too much. I think you should go back to the psychology and philosophy books and study how our own minds deceive us constantly, and there is a reason we have all these biases and blindspots in our every day perceptions and extrapolations. This is a great course on the topic for anyone interested: http://www.thegreatcourses.com/courses/your-deceptive-mind-a-scientific-guide-to-critical-thinking-skills.html (definitely recommended for any newbies ready for some psychedelics) Don't go on a trip if you're not prepared. And i really suggest you stop taking drugs for awhile if you are starting to think everything is a hallucination!!! lol... i've been down that road and those trips will start turning on you eventually. If you haven't had a bad trip yet and seen the dark side of infinity, lets just say that you have some hard times ahead

@Real Eyes Fair enough. But I honestly do remain skeptical of the anti-rationalist viewpoint which is really a tautology as I tried to explain earlier (ie. to comprehend anything or make sense of so-called intuitive experience requires some sort of analytical reasoning to decipher meaning from. @Little Plant I honestly have no idea what you are talking about. Perhaps it's time to lay off the bong for a bit bro.

Please explain to me how not being convinced of something being true is a logical fallacy. I also don't think Lord of The Rings is true besides being a cool story with some good morality lessons thrown in. Are you gonna tell me that the rational approach is to not deny LOTR as true nor false because there's no way to know? Does not the burden of proof lie on those making the extraordinary claims? In this case "permanently englightenment" being as extraordinary as it gets. So do you (or anyone) have any proof that this kind of permanent mental state or shift exists? Or do you just have some new age best selling authors like Echart Tolle saying he was really depressed and then saw some light and felt completely free, sat on a bench for 2 years and wrote The Power of Now? Or could it be that he was suicidal and financially broke and just came up with a cool idea for a business? How do you decide which is true? Maybe you saw him give a talk or met him. Maybe he radiated with such charisma that you thought there's something special there. I have never felt that from anyone besides just some people who are really kind like my dog. I think this is just some hero worship thing and why people go crazy when they see Brad Pitt or teenagers screaming at a Justin Bieber concert. But don't forget that there are people who can pretend to be other people and get awards for it, it's called professional acting. There are also people in this world who are extremely intelligent at manipulating others. Some even start religions like L Ron Hubbard and make billions in the process. That's all business too. And there are drugs you can take to make you appear as anything you want. How do we know all these spiritual gurus weren't just on some good psychedelics every time they were around people? Were they ever tested? Yes in india, they did some bullshit blood tests on some gurus but this is as valid as that guy who went to study eskimoes and decided that because their teeth were bad, our modern diet is bad... lol (Weston Price). He turned that into a successful business too. Because if all you have is some "i once knew this guy who knew this guy like hundreds of years ago" + a few thousand years of history, bad translations and some guys talking about it on the internet, sorry but you're gonna have to do better. None of that is evidence. Wouldn't be accepted in court or in any scientific peer-reviewed study. Every time I take LSD i always have this point where I say to myself "so this is what those spiritual books are talking about". And then the trip wears off and it's back to the daily grind Again, I do think one can behave in enlightened ways, acts of kindness, love, empathy, etc. But that's all. Buddha, Jesus, those have come to resemble the part within all of us that is living in a harmonious way with reality. But the men behind those avatars were just regular guys who jerked off, got angry and took drugs to feel better. Behind the scenes that is. Yet they were great business men. We all have to pay the bills right? But most of these so-called enlightened gurus don't even do that. They just hide away in their castles and release some books and courses now and then meanwhile, people on the internet squabble about who is enlightened and who is not. It would be so easy for any of them to face the media and say, study me. Take me apart. They don't. None ever do that. This is all just philosophy. All of us expressing our ideas, trying to outwit each other. Saying things like "cmon guys, this is basic shit" never takes a discussion anywhere. What are we supposed to say "oh sorry master, forgot... yeah, okay yes yes back to the advanced stuff". lol There's no ego or self in philosophy. It's just ideas being dissected and trying to make sense of the world with logic and reason. The problem is that none of us are philosophers so it's all a bit pointless. But we do have experts trained in this stuff for 10 years. And of course scientific studies that we can check on to see what we do actually know besides some guy who is good with words on the internet. Spirituality is all ego bullshit subjective wuuwuu new age nonsense meant for people who are obsessed with their own egos. It's a dangerous path. Zero productive value to society, humanity or planet earth. Taking drugs is not spirituality, it's just playing with one's brain chemistry without all the growth needed to get to those states in a more natural way that involves community, service and often times some not so pleasant activity (eg. yoga). And I know some clever people can now disprove everything anyone says and just call it hallucination or some bullshit. That's just cowardly. It's really easy to think that enlightenment is real when you take drugs. It's just a trip. Entertainment. Nothing more, nothing less. ************* I have to admit, I really have a huge problem with people who claim to believe shit that they clearly don't. And then say things like it doesn't matter what I believe. Or that it's all a hallucination and that every word means the same as every other word. Then why use words at all? Just live in a cave. Stop using all this technology created by science and capitalism and artists and innovators. If anyone is enlightened, it's those guys. Stop practising morality since everything means everything and nothing and blablablaaa... What have your spiritual salesman heroes produced? Why don't you practice what you claim to believe in? Until you do, it's just words and bullshit and psychedelic trip stories and people trying outwit each other by saying my god is better than your god. This has been going on since humans left the jungle. And people die for it. It's a dangerous path. There are some great thinkers out there researching this stuff professionally. For example this book that's coming out next year. **** Would be cool if we can somehow have this kind of conversation so that we are figuring this shit out together. Everyone is just spewing their own nonsense at each other. It feels like war. Fear and greed and violence. I'm gonna go meditate now and go back to not knowing anything and seeing what happens when I do that. Spiritual Kindergarten

@Leo Gura With all due respect, it sounds like you have fallen deeper into the clutches of your ego which can happen when you start tripping too much on your own kool-aid. Nothing seems real anymore except within the boundaries of some presumed hallucinatory existence. And you start thinking everything is possibly real (or not) and there is no objective reality anymore. I've also noticed you've adopted a very anti-rationalist outlook. But I don't think you really believe that. In fact I think you are projecting and it is you who cannot seem to escape the rationalist approach because however much you try and whatever you do, ultimately you comprehend with the reasoning capabilities of your brain in order to make sense of your experiences. And communicate them to others via social media. Yet you are trying so hard to grasp all this consciousness stuff and you have read somewhere these cool sounding things like there is much more to this "thing" than enlightenment. What the hell does that even mean? When you get away from your computer and all this noise and close your eyes in stillness and silence, you know that this bullshit version of reality you have concocted is all just a game in your head. Yes we are all connected and everything is vibrating and we get some intense sensual shit happening with our trips but there is an ACTUAL world out there. No this is not some dream. That's the thing that happens when we sleep at night. Yes someone people do live in this world as if it is a dream but that's not the same thing as it actually being a dream. You know that's horse shit. So why do you pretend it's not? I don't get it. Trolls? Are you fucking kidding me? Cmon man. I personally don't believe there is such a thing as a permanently enlightened person. That's total bullshit. It's all just temporary states that the brain produces. Yes we can get there more often when we learn to relax our bodies and brains more with yoga, meditation, meds, tantra, etc. This allows life to flow through us and not get stuck in this mental constipation (what most people are doing before they get on the self-actualization path) vs mental masturbation (what most people do when they start tripping too much and reading Castoneda and all this spiritual new age wuuwuu nonsense). We still have to live in a world where we gotta pay for our lifestyles and eat and piss and do the gardening. So perhaps it's more useful to think of enlightened behavior instead of becoming some king of lalaland. I think most of these so-called enlightened gurus are just good writers and charismatic salesmen who have chosen vedanta (non-dual awareness) as their niche. They are just normal people like all of us. Why aren't they scanning their brains to see if something special is going on? Because they wouldn't do it. They have shit to sell. Meanwhile children are starving. Technology is progressing. Wars are being fought. People are living their lives, trying to understand love and how they messed up so bad. Animals are in the wild looking for food and taking care of their young. Me and you are using technology as we speak that was created by real people who don't spend most of their time playing video games or playing these enlightenment games (same shit). Everything you touch and use has been created by a big company with a really wealthy dude at the top. Think about it. Right now I'm going through your Life Purpose course and starting to wonder if this guy even believes his own stuff anymore. I hope you don't sabotage what you have created my friend. Your work is too important. You have created this great place of gathering for people who want to live a new kind of life. There are a lot of people on your forums looking for answers on basic shit. Come back. Or maybe I'm the one projecting

@sleeperstakes You are still a kid. Spend the next 11 years of your life travelling, observing, failing, learning, growing, reading, studying, experimenting, exploring and experiencing whatever the days bring you. Just live like you've survived an accident and you get to continue. Use whatever methods you can to keep going deeper and further and smashing the glass walls of the prison which has been built for the last 19 years of your life. Don't fall into the traditional definitions of relationships, sex, dating, etc. When you interact with people whether it's girls or guys or aliens, stop focusing on what you can get or take or "pick up". Focus on how you can improve their lives. Connect with that. Start seeing all the problems that people have as challenges and invitations and opportunities for you to give them some humor and joy and passion and inspiration and pleasure. Give them what they can't get anywhere else. Connect with who they are as a person, beyond all the makeup and handbags and tight asses and instagram duck lip photos. You really want to support all that? Don't just have sex with their vaginas or titties or mouths. But also with their minds. With their realities. Stop dating and all that teenage "i have a crush on you" horseshit. It's not you who wants that, it's the groupthink that has hijacked your brain. Those are all just cages and you will be trapped (as you described already). Marriage and traditional ownership based relationships are an out-of-date model of keeping the farmers in their place. Find people to build a community with. One that is based on love, truth, freedom and beauty. And if you don't so yet, take Leo's course on finding your life purpose because that will put everything in perspective and ease the ride

You will let go of your incessant need to live from a place of getting, gaining, taking. Those pursuits will no longer interest you and you will look back at these kind of thoughts and get a good ab workout from the laughter. We will all be on a beach somewhere, clinking our beers, remembering the good ol' days when we were still children running around in disneyland, wanting to go on every ride. Instead you will be focused on giving, creating and loving. It will be great fun. People will come up to you and ask you why dogs and children die. You will remind them that without rain, we all die. But rain comes from clouds. And clouds come from the sea. Humans (like dogs) are mostly water. What is water? Where does water come from? We all come from the same place and we are all going home. Life is a phase of death and death (eg. of all your sperm brothers before you big banged your way out of some strangers vagina) means life for someone else. Life and death. Look at the sky. Look at the stars. The sun. It's a dying star giving life to apes like us who want to go to mars. In that sense enlightenment, entrepreneurship and being an artist is exactly the same thing. It's not about money or happiness or getting awards. It's about what you can create today with whatever you got or visualize a new bridge that can help/turn/empower selfish people like me into a perfect manifestation of beauty and connect other fuckups to breed and do the gardening required to sustain our species on this planet in the middle of nowhere. Help others gain, get, take. Take advantage of their lovelessness, their selfishness. The worse off they are, the more you can give. Think about what someone who is enlightened could do for you right now. Switch roles. Voila! Look around my friend. Befriend your fears and enemies and get to know them. You know who i'm talking about: silence, darkness, death, solitude. Those are the places where monsters go to die. Enjoy the show

You are hilarious. Let us know when you're ready to lose the diapers, we'll be here for ya. "too general..." Oh you're killing me. and that part about genetics. Epic. Killer shit. I'm shitting my pants with laughter. Love ya, LB PS. start with this (see bold part above) when you write Leo for his advice!! I'm sure it'll really brighten his day...

Can i use this as a testimonial in a future product i am working on about escaping from disneyland? Please say yes.

Hi there fellow actualizers. I am writing this message because I am two selves going in opposite directions. And it seems that this is what the self-actualization path is all about. Today the void has been calling me strongly. It wants me to go yet it wants me to fill it. (also known as resistance) WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT VOID???? HUH? There comes a time in a man's life when nothing fills it anymore. All the drugs and pussy and love and justice and entertainment and alcohol and happiness and whatever else you can come up with will not fill it. It just gets bigger and bigger the more you try. You have this insane rush gathering and gathering. The urge to go for a quick hit of dopamine, serotonin and all those chemical cocktails we have become addicted to from birth because we have been conned into a game of survival when the truth is that life is just another phase of death and vice versa. Is this what it feels like to be a woman? You drink and smoke and eat and fuck and pump it up and burn it and freeze it and dive in with the sharks and lions and volcanoes and at some moments you get an immense relief. Shelter from the storm, as Bob Dylan called it. You are broken and freezing and dirty and full of hate and lies and you've raped and murdered and bombed children and whipped yourself with a razor belt and you've hijacked planes and driven them into skyscrapers. The void. You want to allow it and let it go and forgive and surrender to all this madness and all the voices and you are lost and hopeless and you smile and start to laugh hysterically. Just let go. Release. All of it. The pain. The joy. The "trying to figure out" why they did it and why she has to die and comforting others with some bullshit buddhist advice that you don't even believe in yourself. You never wanna miss an opportunity of stepping up as the wise one. No sir! Those answers are never found. Just brutal suffering. You used to think that this is what makes everything beautiful. The kinder you are born, the more intense the suffering. It takes a lifetime of failure and seeing the illusions life has to offer to learn to suffer with kindness, that is the ultimate gift. You walk around this palace of lies. Orgies everywhere. Your friends and family just want to relax from work. Buy some new clothes and dream of a better life but their smiles have faded and this makes you sad because you are just starting to get this shit and really coming alive. So what the fuck does that imply? That as you ascend to the Gods, all the people you love will drown in hell, waiting for you to rescue them but no longer convinced that anything is possible?? What the fuck kind of cruel twisted lullaby is that? You walk around the cities and parks of the world. Stare at birds and flowers and old ladies with their monk-like dumbness and you want to just tell them to keep on living in their bubble because.... i forget what i wanted to say. Am i an alien? Is that it? Can we really be the same species with all these hum-ants? I never wanted this fucking awareness shit. I wanna be a happy slave. Willingly bend over and take it up the ass like a good little school girl. So yeah. Hi. Life is getting better, it is. Figuring out what my values are. But I'm an addict and you know what they say, never trust an addict. It's like I really wanna be depressed but my newfound wisdom just says "thoughts and feelings" that's all there is. Depression is another dumb idea for losers who want to just stay where they are in life. It's a clever disguise. Being depressed implies that your are somebody that is something. We all know that there's no substance to anything at all. Just a dynamic movement of random reactions and things hunting other things to stay alive. Lights and sounds, all around. You try to meditate outside but all of the machines and insects start to sound like symphonies. What a fucking distraction. It's hard to find some proper silence these days. The more closer you get, it's like some prick is turning up the volume of the "hum" or "om". You're way past going to see someone for this. You will traumatize those bastards. You can go in anytime. Into It !! Different paths and approaches: kindness, calm, humor, yoga of the moment... you can dance like a madman and feel the void in its entirety. Right here right now anytime any place. I don't give a fuck if its the presidents funeral. When the void calls, you better be ready boy. That's the real challenge and I KNOW it's waiting for me. I'm procrastinating. Money, sex, travel, happiness, business, art, writing, reading... I was gonna add Leo's course to that list but actually that's one of the few things that seem to really be taking me towards the void. And it's scary. It's hard work. All these value assessments and shit. God damn it. I just thought i wanted money and pussy. Not "love" and "truth" and "beauty". But i knew what this was about when signed up for this shit. I enlisted in the greatest army there is. They love young handsome soldiers like me. Leo recruits them young. What the hell man. Can i throw up the red pill and pretend we never met? (puts finger down throat) Hahahahahahaaaaaa (vomit of laughter) "Best joke i've heard all year." That's like asking to be unborn. To press rewind and go back to .... The void. It's inescapable. Waiting for you to shut all this bullshit off. The darkness. The silence. The light. It's waiting for you. Legs spread wide open. Rock hard. The king of all pleasure and pain and sorrow. There's a bloody hell of a revolution to crawl through to even get out of the prison. You fight the war and kill all your enemies and then find your people dead and see the enemy boss in the mirror. Takes another sip of some shitty disgusting beer. Ugh. Even jerked off twice today. I want more. MORE MORE MORE MORE. And the headache. Aaa. God let me just fucking be. I dont want to face anything. I want to keep on running away from reality and intoxicating myself and staying here with all these good hearted people who keep me down. You must continue. Stay strong brother. You have come this far. JUST. KEEP. GOING. I wish i still knew how to cry hard.

As a male from and living in Finland (i'm 34, good looking, smart, funny, artist, blablbalblaa) I have to say that the cultural stereotypes ElenaO referred to are kind of bullshit. I mean yes to some degree they are true that people are more reserved here but it's not really different here compared to anywhere. Depends what kind of "normalcy" you choose to believe in. Finland is a myth. Finnish people are a myth. Just humans on earth. Surviving, education, health, eating, shitting, pissing, ejaculating, drinking, working, paying the bills, etc. Some of us want more than that. MUCH more. We want perfection. Enlightenment. Truth. God. Love. And we will look for those things in a myriad ways whether it's drugs, materialism, sex, yoga, music, family or whatever. I've travelled a lot. Lived in many different countries and continents. On a surface level there is some cultural differences. But overrall humans are pretty similar wherever we go. And again what most people think they want on a surface level is often in conflict with what they REALLY want on a reptilian level AND from a higher consciousness point of view. When we can see how these converge we start getting to a higher plane. Sex + Love = fucking nuclear bomb of potential. This is so powerful, you can't imagine it because it goes where thoughts are not allowed. Or take a good hit of DMT. Same effect without all the failure and personal growth needed to even get what I'm saying. So in that sense drugs/meds are kind of cheating but they do give us a good glimpse. For example, Elena mentioned the following earlier in this thread: I thought it's quite obvious what I want from him. What does a girl usually want? A relationship. Right. But why do you want that? That's not what you really want. Why would you want a relationship with a guy you don't even know nor have slept with? This is a lot of unnecessary burden to put on an interaction with a person you just think is "hot". You want him sexually and that's the main desire fueling the 'socially accepted' girl talk horseshit of "i want a relationship". That's why you think he's hot and he has a great body. And you are deeply attracted to him. You probably even fantasize about him which is completely healthy. And if you're a healthy, attractive, smart girl, he will feel the same. I don't mean this in some porn fantasy way as guys love to think but you want him inside your mind and body and to see if he might be the one (which is another erroneous concept i wont get into here). But something is off here... Why isn't he making a move on you? That's what I don't get. Maybe he's gay. Maybe he's shy. Maybe he doesn't like you. Or maybe he's just not the man you think he is. There's only one way to find out. ONLY ONE. Forget all the other ones even if they exist (because they offer zero growth potential). Take control. If he doesn't want to play with you, it will be good to know. You can even ask him why and who knows become great friends. It's always great to have friends around who we can actually be HONEST with. Does anyone have any of those? People who dont tolerate our bullshit? And this thread and all your comments seem to point to a higher truth which is actually much more interesting and deeper than what you think your issue is (not sure what to do to take things to the next level). You are procrastinating. You are afraid. So lets cut the shit. Stop defending your bullshit. What are you afraid of? Perhaps it's being labelled a slut if you ask him out or sleep with him or tell HIM that you think he's hot. Maybe. But what the hell. You're a young girl with needs. And wants. Some of those needs/wants are primitive (biology) and some are divine (goddess). Remember, this website is Self-Actualization. Not cosmopolitan. So be real. Stop with the bullshit and lies. No it's not bad that you started this thread except for your ego. I'm really glad you started this thread. It's uncomfortable and you can feel that discomfort in your body. You even gave up on it because people here love to feed each other's bullshit (i've noticed). So why did you and everyone abandon it? What's with all these abandoned threads on here? Sometimes this place feels like a ghost town. I want some resolution at least or admittance to failure. I'm a failure, we all fail. Lets stop kidding ourselves and trying to be perfect all the time. We are all horny idiots deep down, looking for love. So yeah... time to grow up and become the woman you are. Most women are just as weak as most men. And then they start dating... Those kind of people bore me who want to play these soap opera games. I want to find REAL men and women. Men for friendship and women to love and fuck and create new life with. And what the hell, maybe even switch it up now and then so I'm the woman Anyways, we need more Cleopatras in this world. Not women trying to be men (or vice versa). No not at all. I mean girls becoming WOMEN and boys becoming MEN. Woman who want to nurture Earth and all the little boys looking for mommy. Otherwise we are just dumb children running around with barbie dolls and sandcastles and our little penises flapping around and shoes on backwards. That's what most people are. They are lost and lonely and just want to suck on mommy's titty (and the governments or public opinions) and running through puddles with shit and piss running down their legs so that we have shit and piss and cum everywhere and these kids play tag and get crushes on other barbiedoll kids and when they are old enough and drunk enough, they fuck and have more stupid kids until they're all grandparents who are still kids playing with dolls and legos with a boring life to look back on. That's what we have now and that's what it's always been. I'm here to change that and light the planet up with some god damned inspiration and justice and freedom and beauty. Figure out what you want in this world. And then... TAKE IT. No fucks given. Leave the false labels for losers who love being normal and mediocre. And stop having crushes. Those are for 10 year old little girls. Grow up. I want to encourage madness and wildness and genius and brilliance in everyone I come across, here and elsewhere. That's my life's mission. And if you give me even a hint or spark or trace of blood on my scent. I will hunt you down like a shark going in for the kill. Or like Bruce Springsteen (listen to I'm On Fire), depends how you wanna look at it. Now Elena, before you tell me how I don't understand you at all, listen to this song: And of course I'm aware that you might've already made a move. That's why i asked earlier what happened. So curious to know what did happen or if anything happened. Just some friendly chit chat That's all. I would say something highly inappropriate in Finnish now but out of respect to Leo's rules, I'm not gonna do that. Enjoy your day little girl.

@ElenaO So what happened?

You're very welcome but why did you put wisdom in quotation marks? I'm a little "offended" You haven't developed shit. You have no idea what enlightenment or mindfulness even means. Maybe your therapist didn't either or at least they failed to teach you. Otherwise you wouldn't be writing all this bullshit. You once again used those things to GET something, and expect some magic pill from practising them for "a year with a therapist". That's not at all how mindfulness works. You don't meditate or practise mindfulness so you can get enlightened or get happy or become a hit with the ladies. No. You practise those so you can learn how to stop doing things with all these expectations. You learn to become who you really are. This might take years and years to grasp so that year doesn't mean shit. Do you honestly not see what you are doing with the way you constantly express yourself? It's like you're asking us for tips to cure your headache while bashing your head against the wall. Guys i need help (boom) with my head (boom) it fucking hurts guys (boom) god damn it guys i just (boom) want some help my head (boom) i did all this work with my headache doctor (boom) but i cant seem to (boom boom boom) ... etc. etc. I don't think you're nice at all. You continue to bully and disrespect yourself and I don't like it when people treat others like that, even if it's just themselves. I'm a better friend to you than you are to yourself. You are NOT a nice guy. You're a complete fucking tool. Douchemeister. Re-read this whole thread and tell me those are the words of someone who is nice. Unless by nice you mean weak. Be kind. Forget about nice. Start with yourself. You are extremely boring though and repetitive so you definitely got that right. I'd love to see more of that comedic side come through. Even a touch of humor in your self-deprecation would really make our day here in the forums. I changed my mind. I honestly don't think you're ready for the course. You'll be one of those guys who does it and asks for a refund when his life is not perfect after not even completing all the materials. I really think you should go back to the PUA stuff, go to their seminars, read the 30 books about the 11 step method for walking up to a girl in disneyland while riding a donkey with a pink cowboy hat. As I said, those seminars are for losers like you and I'm sure you'll make some great friends there so you can all get together and complain how shitty you all are with women and jerk each other off. My old self says hi to all the guys! Wait, something is not right here... Did you just use the word ambition? And universal? And 'create a world'? Is that you Hardkill?? No way. I miss the old hardkill. Go back to loser mode again. I don't like this new you. I want to hear about PUA and how you learned everything but nothing works. That's what we love you for. Not this dreamer shit. ****** THIS is what you want to start focusing on. This is a completely different Hardkill now coming to the fore. I suggest you start focusing on that. Really map this out and study it and brainstorm and immerse yourself in everything that is needed to start moving towards that kind of world. Gain expertise on all the relevant fields, develop the skills you need to take your project forward. Become world class! Change the world. My heart feels great joy that you decided to include this last paragraph in your reply because it means you took up my challenge and told your "i suck with women" false self and told him to go fuck himself (rightfully so). And especially how you wanted to end heartache and you did because my heart was aching for you to make this breakthrough. And you did!! That makes me so proud. But you will go back to the swamp, this shit doesn't change over night. But this shows you can break free from it. I did. I was even worse than you. Mega loser!! I could barely get it hard with my first gf in my teens, I was so god damn insecure (and I was a pretty boy too but that doesn't mean shit when you are a loser mama's boy inside). Now you are again ready for the Life Purpose Course. You have hope. I really think you can successfully live this dream of yours and everything will fall in place nicely. Just be open to really questioning your values and beliefs about the world and that you may decide to narrow the focus even more so you are for example working on improving education or perhaps just focus on justice. These are all big topics. Or you may discover that you really want to become an expert at female orgasms, and the will flock to you a famine just ended and you are free bread. who knows ******** So how does life feel now that you have your women issues COMPLETELY resolved and you are getting laid left and right although since you are so busy with your dream of bettering the world, you don't really have time for women so much these days? I bet you have some stories to tell the grandkids! How does it feel to be the new you? (play along with me here) Fuck man, you are one awesome dude. I'm really grateful that you took the time to get on these forums and express your troubles. That takes guts and courage. You even found some new ideas and inspiration. Maybe you didn't agree with everything that was said. Some people were a little too harsh on you perhaps but then again, sometimes we need some random asshole to put is in our place when we are lost in the dark. I really think this is a new turning point for you. Tomorrow you will wake up and it'll be like christmas morning but instead of gifts under the tree and all that christmas shit, you will be filled with the gift of free oxygen to breathe, water to drink, food on the table, freedom to pursue your goals and dreams and build your body and master your psyche and libraries and bookstores full of brilliant people who left you their personal notes and ideas to inspire you and so much potential and laughter and beauty everywhere you go and look. It's a great time to be alive my friend. Welcome home. ******* My work is done here. I really hope some of this "wisdom" rubbed off on you. I know you like your authority figures and it can sometimes be hard taking someone with "butt monkey" under their name, too seriously. You can leave my office now. That's right, get the fuck out. Take the trash while you go. NEXT!

Hi Hardkill, welcome to the forums. I just read through this whole thread and I can empathize with your problem as I used to be in a similar position until I got it sorted. I'm gonna say some things now that you probably won't wanna hear. You sound like a loser. And that's based on the few posts I have read. I have no idea what you look like or how you are in really life but based on the small interactions here and your avatar, you come across as really desperate and needy. If I was a girl or even as a friend, I would avoid people like you. All you want is to take take take. You keep on blabbering away about getting an answer from Leo as if he will give you some magic pill. And I suspect that's the same thing you have been looking for from all that PUA nonsense. Not a good first impression! Not for guys, not for girls, not for jobs, not for anything. Obviously you understand nothing about people, persuasion, human psychology, cognitive errors, mating dynamics. I'm not surprised since all the stuff you say you've read is a bunch of bullshit. I've said elsewhere on this forum that the whole "pickup" industry is a scam to take advantage of desperate guys. You are a case in point. Learn to think for yourself. Become a man. Grow up. This is much more important right now than getting your dick wet. If you wanna get laid, hire a prostitute. And I say this with love because I think you can change if you cut this bullshit and get serious with your life. I'm the big brother or father figure you never had giving you the talk on the edge of your bed about how to become a man. You're 29 and age is irrelevant because time is not real. You are 9 or 19 or 99. Doesn't matter. Here's a question for you: What is your life purpose? If you don't know or have no clue, take Leo's course. Since you have a job, you can afford it. No excuses. And since you seem to love Leo so much and you want him to give you all the answers, this course will give you an overdose of Leo. Just you and him, all alone Get your shit together. Stop fucking around and wasting our time with your bullshit mindgames. Nobody cares. (I wish someone would've given me thís talk many years ago, it would've saved me a lot of frustration and madness). You can thank me later Much love brother and if you reply to this and you're still continuing your needy bullshit, I will not respond. Other members can continue playing your games and feeling sorry for you but I certainly will not because I pity no one. I empower. Hint: tell us what you're gonna do tomorrow, what you're grateful for, express your positive attitude (it's good practise), tell us what a handsome motherfucker stud you are and how girls love you and you make them feel good and how much you enjoy making their days even 1% better, and how feminine energy inspires you and even making a girl smile is a victory for you and everything else is a bonus. Lie if you have to. Just tell us something nice. Since you are using an avatar online, mineaswell make it someone awesome. That's why my name is Lord B.W.Y.R.A. Be Who You Really Are. That's my God. I am nobody. Just some guy, living his life, pursuing life mastery. Yes, I'm a genius artists in the real world but that's another story. You can do this my friend. Don't believe these lies in your head that you worship. You have created a false self, this person is an imposter, it's not the real you. Stop feeding that fucking loser victim mentality. Now tell us how great you are and what a great day you've had. You have all your limbs, you have a dick that works and your dick and a winning smile and fire in your eyes. You are alive and breathing and make people feel awesome. You find inspiration in everyone because they are all sent here for you as a guide like angels in hell. Or do you wanna go back to being mr. "i suck with women, nothing works" boohoo waawaawaa, i want mommy's titty? Huh? Poopy in your diaper? THROW OUT THE DIAPER!!! DIAPER'S ARE FOR LOSERS. Shit on the floor! Get the course!! And next time you see a cute girl, tell her you suck with women but just wanted to say hi and that you have a beautiful smile. If she still hates you, go to the book store and get some Bukowski novels so you can see what laughter feels like. Read Women where it starts with him as a 50 year old drunk who hasn't been laid in years until finally he bangs some 300 pound and the bed breaks. In the morning his wallet is missing and he blames the whore for hiding in her vagina, lol. It's a great book. That's it. That's all I got for you man. Oh wait... Here's a good 3 step process that will get you far in life: Look Good Smell Good Feel Good Then leave the house and conquer your world Enjoy your day.

I wrote a reply to this discussion but decided to post it in my journal instead (in case anyone is interested).

There comes a point where all words, symbols, music, paintings, gestures or other attempts at communicating that which can only be experienced, bleed into one another and explode out of each others asses as a great ocean of cosmic laughter. For this reason, these things can never be taken too seriously on a conversational level. Yet we all still continue our lives in the land of mere mortals (as long as these bodies will allow) where such things as kindness, compassion, forgiveness, beauty and truth rule the day. At least if our brains/bodies are working optimally and we have cultivated enough wisdom to grasp how things work (cause, effect, right, wrong, etc). That's why Jesus, Buddha and self-help books are still selling well even after all these years of stupidity and fallen empires. People clearly need some kind of instructional manuals for how to live. Some more than others perhaps. There is however incredible cruelty in this world where certain minorities and species are brutally oppressed and victimized. Every day. Every moment. It can be very challenging to comprehend the degree to which some will go to, for their own twisted sense of pleasure or disregard for the sanctity of life. At this point we can also say that there are no rules and it's all just a palace of illusion (maya) which we create in our own minds. So it doesn't matter what we do. Eat animals. Torture them. Fondle children. Rape. Kill. Murder. Hunt. Fish. Lie. Steal. Cheat. Nothing matters because none of it is real. You create all this and all reactions and interpretations are just manifestations of your own ego. The sun shines equally on the psychopath and the saint. Blablablaaa. Both perspectives are true of course (rules vs no rules) and possible. What's doable is natural. Just be careful not to fall into the fallacy of appeal to nature. There are still rules in operation here on THIS plane, whether we like them or not. The following statement may be worth analyzing: Those who violate the golden rule, are not entitled to its benefits. I personally think the problems we have in this world are systemic in nature. We cannot blame anyone or even society because we are society. Gandhi talked about becoming the change we wish to see in the world. I would take that even further to say that you are the truth for which you seek. You either merge with the wholeness/oneness of life or you keep looking for ways to avoid the inevitable. Meanwhile, the gods are laughing.