Viking

I watched that video and I kind of have to say that I agree on some level. I was never in a relationship but I would imagine it takes a shitload of emotional energy. Going after the life purpose, contributing to society, getting enlightened, getting wisdom is much more important than having a relationship. I guess the ideal approach is to have casual sex at the start as long as it develops me, because i never had sex, and not to be in a relationship. Maybe date in order to get experience but not to go too far. At age 30+ to search for a partner and to start developing a deep connection. For women it is for sure different, but for men, as said in the video and as ive seen in other places his sexual value maximizes near 40. It also makes sense because if I would date a woman, she would be minimum 18. I dont want to have kids until 30-35, because I wouldnt be able to finance it and it would hinder my personal development. That means that the woman would have to date me until I was about 30, but ideally a woman would have kids at around 25-30, because of her biology. If I would date a girl my age she could potentially waste all of her young years with me if we would break up at the end. that would mean that after the break up, say at around age 30, she would have very little value compared to a 25 year old woman, so she could stay lonely for her whole life. That's just evil and ignorant from my perspective to do that.

@now is forever i dont identify as an existentialist, i dont care about labels much. bruh, its either me or you, but i cant understand how what you write me connects to my previous posts. what did you mean by all that? @Crystalous to me thinking that my sense of existence is the only truth is a belief.

the materialist paradigm- consciousness is a byproduct of brain activity. Give me points that contradict that, make me doubt that.

@now is forever didnt get you. all im saying is that i dont know about other potential truths, and the only truth that i do know is that i exist

@Joseph Maynor i dont care about enlightenment, i dont know what it is anymore. what i care about is truth

@now is forever its not a question of whether it matters or not, its a question of truth. the only thing i know for sure is that i exist, but that doesnt mean its the only truth that can be. the outside world can exist, i don't know

but there's stuff you cant disprove. I cant disprove, even experientially, that there's no outside world. hence I stay in a place where I dont know.

@now is forever wat

why? how can you know or not know something for certain? except that youre aware i guess

@Leo Gura Do you experience personally semi-serious benefits already, after months of doing kriya?

I suggest try first a 10 day vipassana retreat and see how you do, if you cant manage that dont do 5 meo. i would also recommend building up to it with different psychedelics with different dosages. for example some shrooms, then lsd, then a heroic shroom dose (5g) and then Id only try 5meo. it might me too much information at once for you so you might not get anything out of it.

tried to do what you recommended. didnt connect at all to the words, sounded too superficial and cheesy thanks anyway

Actually a very strange thing happened to me. I was looking at the moon and I felt sort of "download" of energies from it. I felt a sensation in the belly, it was as though it was growling and I was hungry. I didnt think anything of it, but then about 30 minutes later, I was with my friends, the moon became more red I felt this energy in my hands and back and i started to freak a little, but it passed. at around 10pm when the eclipse was at it's peak I felt a sensation in the back of my head. I concentrated on it and it went to the front of my head. at that point the sensations in the upper back and the hands came back again, but much stronger. the energy continued and continued to increase and I felt a sharp pain in my teeth, they actually became very large, and a lot of hair was coming out of my hands and my back!!! my nails also started to grow bigger and i couldnt help the energy in my throat chakra and just started howling. everyone around me looked at me terrified. then I felt this anger and that hungry feeling again and I couldnt hold myself back and slaughtered and ate all my friends. im now covered in blood, I ran back home just to write about it here in the forum!! and what a synchronicity that you posted a topic about this!! all the hair fell out and I dont know what to do now, im contemplating suicide, help.

watched both vids. In both I couldnt grasp the "I AM", I have no idea what that is or how can I be aware of it or experience being it. Am I aware? yes, definitely, how do I know? because it has to be the case, but I cant get what that experience in the present is like.

not sure what you meant here, but x rays and gamma rays are the same photons with different frequencies (energies) human perception of time has nothing to so with "physical" time. time in terms of physics depends on how fast youre traveling compared to another object. youre misunderstanding. time in the human sense is neurology and psychology, not physics.

physics student here. in physics light is separate from matter. light is a particle in the category "bosons", which is separate from the other category "fermions", therefore light is not everything. look up quantum field theory. that theory says that everything is oscillation of fields. i wouldnt try to describe awareness with concepts, because it will never catch it.

i didnt really pay attention to reactions from people, but generally people laugh or smile, not in an awkward way. i just say "i love you" whenever i feel a slight affection for someone, anyone. i feel the emotion much stronger and i feels good to say it. tbh i struggle a lot with loving kindness meditation, i dont feel anything. i also rarely feel love for inanimate objects. maybe sometimes ill feel love for a flower, but rarely. even when i think about people i dont feel love, even to my mother, noone. but during a physical interaction i can feel love for almost everyone.

@blazed its scientifically proven that when you smile your brain releases chemicals that make you feel good. its not that i dont love people, its when i say them "i love you" i feel the love more.

I dont agree. In my personal life sometimes I casually say "i love you" to people or send heart emojis. Even though I dont feel too strongly the love for that specific person, when I say those words I suddenly feel more loving. its like smiling to yourself in the mirror. even if you dont want to, after a while youll fake it till you make it.

thank you

well, i didnt try it with women even, and as i said i dont feel any desire to be with a man, but the fear is there.

what specifically do you mean by that? if you mean emotional stuff, life purpose, relationships and all that, substances, practices and books help a shitton with that.

ive seen most of his videos. i still dont get it fully.

cant do that. isnt that neti neti what youre describing? and what questions am i supposed to be asking? if i ask who am i, i get an answer -"no idea"

im doing a classic 10 day vipassana. no self inquiry. I did see both leo's videos on self inquiry though. I think I have some problems with my brain, when I ask a question I dont get the meaning of the question, hence i dont get an answer. im saying the question in my head and continue feeling the sensation. I can realize though that im not the sensation, but not because im something other than the sensation, but because i somehow know that im not the sensation, seems kinda obvious.