Tyler Robinson

Yea I get this part. I wasn't being superficial with my advice though, I really meant it in the most serious manner. It's always good to go out there, work hard and get good with dating, all that jazz. But you forgot that I was responding to the guy who made it appear as though his whole life depended on a woman Validating his desire for her and making him feel better. This sounds awfully weak, obsessive, and very depowering to me. It's like hinging your whole life on relationships. I don't think anyone serious with personal development will ever support this sort of a stance. It's worrisome because it means that if you don't get what you want with the opposite sex, you're essentially close to Giving up on your life, that's a defeatist mentality.

I wouldn't go as far as telling someone to overcome the desire for sex. My point was limited only to seeking validation which looks cruel to me. Isn't being alone better than being constantly rejected and tossed over? How long will a person waste their time chasing? Things feel better when they come effortlessly and naturally, of course I never mean to say a man should just sit around waiting for a woman to fall on his lap, but if you consider all the logistics and the effort that goes into it(not if you're a cool handsome hunk, I'm talking about unattractive struggling males), it's sometimes better to not fan the flames of fantasy and come back to reality, understand how dysfunctional the world is and not become a slave to the social validation game, only if we didn't constantly add more buzz to the idea that a man's self worth depended on the kind and the number of women he could get, then maybe a lot of men out there could rest a bit lazy and consequently less suicides too, it's a win win.

I can't stop laughing. This is too funny.

Very much agree with you. Nothing better than learning more and broadening ones horizon. Never saw that as a waste of time, if anything at all, it was perhaps the most fruitful use of time.

@Devin but sex also involves fetishes too. I just don't get you. There's also sex without fetishes. There's food with garnishing and without garnishing. I'm missing your point entirely or you're being comically vague.

You're being too vague. What does this even mean? Any elaboration? Any example? Any structure? How do you express yourself sexually (I'm talking about you in the person)? (BTW I already knew you would be vague)

Then I'm waiting for you to explain what sexuality is. Please go ahead.

@Devin you fulfill yourself your way, I fulfill myself my way. Don't see why there is a problem here. Just that I was never aware of your way. It sounded too unnatural to me.

Yea because it belongs to me lol, as in a personal sense. Why would I say "our" sexuality when I don't know if others are into it or not.

@mr_engineer Lmao there are so many things that are wrong with your post that I won't care to dissect. You have a total different mentality that is almost borderline old style sexism.. And you project an awful lot on me I guess the best is to avoid discussing with you because we both aren't on the same page anymore. Have a good day.

This was wonderfully and logically explained.

How is that even remotely associated with ego lol?

@mr_engineer you're taking it in a seriously twisted way so I don't know how to explain it to you. There is too much bitterness and assumption and negativity in your post. I never meant to be morally superior even in the slightest. I don't even know how morality even got into this conversation when I never spoke about morals at all. I was talking about empowerment not morality. This has nothing to do with what anyone has to offer. You bring things into a discussion that just don't belong, like strawmanning me on an absurd scale. I was talking about being empowered. And that means not giving power or authority to someone who can take advantage. This is a very generic advice anyone would offer on literally any self help platform out there so I don't see what I did was so wrong other than you just wanting to find something for nothing. You can't rely on anyone in this world for your emotional needs, much less the opposite gender. If I told you something like I can't live without men, you would tell me to grow up. Because that's childish. Men and women are equal.. I should need a man only as much as he needs me, not more. Otherwise there's a power imbalance, a codependency. Gender and relationships is only a part of your life but not your whole life. It's not just about men being independent. Every human, man or woman has to learn it. Both emotional and financial independence. You can't be living like a kid in this world. It's only when you're independent your cup is full. Being dependent is either due to some trauma or neurosis. It's one thing to offer love and another thing to be so dependent on it that you can't function without it. So an emotionally independent person, man or woman can also offer you love, but in a much matured way, not in a silly way where both of you cannot live without each other or toxic dependency where it becomes a constant preoccupation or addiction taking your focus away from other things in life. Well it's nice that a man can offer his Masculinity to me, it shouldn't be anything more than that. It enriches life for sure but that's where it stops. Being so dependent on relationships is a sure sign for trouble. Most people like that end up in abusive relationships because they can't think they can get away, they're stuck in thinking that they need it too much to live without it. It causes a person to become fragile and weak and totally dependent to the point that they start tolerating abuse just to keep the relationship. That's what codependency is. There is no low self worth in self empowerment. In fact there is low self worth if you rely on others to decide your worth.. You have an egotistical stick up your ass. That's why I would simply avoid talking to you. You're using words like "lecturing to men" when I was simply suggesting. There's no point in arguing or debating you. You come up with shitty assumptions on someone's good intent. Move on.

My sexuality is just my sexual fetishes and fantasies that is all and I crave dominance in the bed. To each his own, way of fulfilling the selves.

Omg I'm getting hungry to know more. I don't know what questions to shoot. But please do a favor and write those 10 pages in your journal lol. It would be a great help because I tend to look for mentors too a lot like you do. So. Please do it.

One of the reasons I avoid therapy. It appears suspicious to me. Not all are bad. I suggest you check reviews. But reviews can be fake too.

Can you offer a short summary of what you learned regarding dealing with mentors. Genuinely curious.

@Raptorsin7 but isn't 7-8 months too long for you to finally figure out that the advice wasn't really helpful? If I were you, I would have canceled by the 4th month. Does this sound reasonable in hindsight?

@Raptorsin7 OK, that's not a huge amount. Leo's course is like 250dollars something but it's very valuable. Like lifelong valuable. I don't know much about this guy's course because I have never taken it. I had applied for similar things where a guy promised me that I could make a lot of money and I lost $1000. I suffered a lot of stress and anxiety after that. Not saying that this guy could be a scam but I stay away from folks who that kind of stuff. Anyway take this suggestion a bit seriously if you I'll. I think the mistake you made with @Nahm is that you continued giving giving him money post the 3rd month mark. If something is genuinely useful to you, you would and must figure it out in the first 4 months max. If it doesn't you should drop it. You can't keep funneling your money into something and wait till the end like 8 months to know that it's not working for you. That's not just a waste of money but also a huge waste of time. So set a bar for 4 months max. See how it's going for you. If it's good enough and justifies your payment up until then, continue for more. If you didn't see much benefit from the first four months, then cancel and withdraw paying any further. In my opinion, spending money is not a problem if it's a small amount on something that is of value to you. But be wary of spending big amounts in short periods of time because it doesn't give you enough room or time to decide whether it was worth spending, like if someone told you to spend $500 for a weekly or a single course, stay away from such, because they are designed to make you pay right away before you get to decide their real benefits. $50 is bare minimum so it's kinda a gamble you can say. Spend 4 months and that would come to $200 and then you can decide if the $200 was worth it. Also as a side note, there are many free resources like books and YouTube videos that teach you a lot of stuff, although I can't link it because I'm not in this market or area. But these places have a ton of shit for free for practically everything in life. So yea try to be more practical and reasonable this time. Give yourself a grace period of 4 months max so you won't feel guilty putting your money all the way. Also a cancel any time subscription based service/course is far better than a one time huge payment like 1000s of dollars. It's kinda safer on your pocket.

Is it $50 a month now or it is just a one time payment?

@Raptorsin7 a man who teaches you how to be rich will never make you rich. Mark my words. Just a suggestion. Take it or leave it. But it would be funny(not in a bad way) if you came back and told everyone that you were scammed. Good luck. You'll need it..

This was perfect. My perspective as well.

Nope. Not my experience. I don't know how you guys manage it but good for you. For me I've always needed imagination. Maybe I'm just not used to something you're saying.

I think this is the same mentality that leads to misogyny. You've some serious delusions going on there and to make women the center of your life is dangerous, you're giving them way too much authority. You don't need anyone's validation in this world to thrive, and this applies to both men and women. This kind of love is just toxic obsession. It comes from desperation. A confident man is not begging for a woman, he knows he can love her when she is ready to receive. You seem to be overcompensating something, maybe you hated women in the past, I don't know. But if a man told me that he simply cannot function without women, I'd consider that as a weak man. That man wouldn't look strong in my eyes. And a woman is always scanning for strength in a man. Whatever you wrote is fine from an emotional perspective. But not from a self development perspective.

That's getting a little personal. Same right back at you. Please don't mention me in the future, you're blocked.