Tyler Robinson

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Entry78/17 I've removed Jim from my life successfully. Now there's only one Alpha male in my life And that's Eric. And I love him Trust the man who wants you genuinely. Be with him because he wants you and is not shy about it. These are the things to look for A man who is Alpha A man who owns you A man who supports you A man who protects you A man who leads you A man who cares about you A man who gives you intimacy

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I'm against red and black pill but I'll always maintain that attraction is biological.

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Entry70/17 My spirit craves for an entity that is dominating, caring, protective, disciplining and motivating. I think what I'm doing here is oscillating between feminine love and masculine love. Feminine love = caring, sensitive Masculine love = tough love, direction, strength, discipline So what is the femininity in me looking for? It's looking for a — "tough love spirit" activator spirit Motivator spirit Leader spirit Protector spirit Disciplining spirit Strong spirit Provider spirit And what's the masculinity looking for in me? Guide spirit Wise spirit Caring spirit Loyal spirit Comforter spirit Calm spirit So every spirit needs a complementary spirit to feel complete To create harmony with the inner self, you need to have a complementary spirit.

Entry69/17 Once again I don't know what it was. But I was running through cloud and smoke and it was after me, it was an entity. I felt like this entity wanted to rape me. It wanted to control me. I wake up in sweat and I feel like my whole body was trembling. Feeling cold, naked and scared. It's hard to explain how it feels. But this entity wanted to be with me. I'm not sure if the entity cared about me. But sometimes it felt nice. This happened to me during sleep. Did I want to be dominated by this entity?

Entry68/17 I don't know why I have all these conqueror fantasies but they seem to be stemming from my need to complete myself.. It's like I'm the one half that needs the other half to complete me. My half represents submission and surrender whereas the other half should be about domination and control and passion. When these two meet, I feel like it's fireworks. I only feel relaxed and fully complete when these two sides merge within me sexually and romantically. It's like I'm always looking for the conqueror archetype. Is this a specific female fantasy created through brain wiring or is it unique to me and you have never heard someone have these before. I want the guy I love to fully conquer and own me and make me his till the end of eternity. This romance or thirst to never end. I always wish to be in a state of mystic surrender emotionally, mentally and spiritually. Do you want your other half to be exactly like you or do you want the other half to complete you. Do you feel a natural thirst romantically. Are these fantasies only fantasies or do they exist to serve an internal purpose of spiritual and emotional fulfillment? Or is such fulfillment just a futile passion that's not pursuing/seeking? I know the questions and the thoughts behind them are very ambiguous yet fantasies themselves are such an ambiguous part of human sexual side, some people would want to die for their fantasies, holding them dear to death whereas some people dismiss them as futile imaginations of a hyper creative mind that would look good only on paper, not in reality, how much of life is real, how much of it mimics art and fiction, too many questions, too few answers. Fantasies represent a mysterious side of human phenomenon..

Are you happy and passionate with the work you're doing currently? What makes you feel good? For me personally I get extreme satisfaction after I complete a piece of art. Share what makes you feel good.

Entry67/17 I need to focus on my sexual fantasies. I like to be dominated. So I want the fantasy to consist of a weird dynamic where I have been kidnapped by the enemy of my clan, a rival gang and then held in captivity for days. During this time they feed me and take care of me and I'm supposed to sleep with the conqueror. This is a role play. There is humiliation, enslavement and masochist elements to this. In the end I surrender sexually And the conqueror takes care of me. I assume him to look like a Tarzan. My desires are kinda primal. The enemy gang takes care of me and I belong to them forever. It's like a love hate relationship and I find peace both in love and hate. Even if they hate me they don't want me gone. Everything works out for the better in the end. When I think of such things I'm able to love myself better. I guess love and hate are strong emotions and two sides of the same coin.

Entry66/17 Maybe it's my infantilism and neediness which is at the root of it that needs to be addressed Maybe I want a parental figure. Maybe it's repressed trauma. Maybe it's my inner child that is seeking to be dominated and probably treated badly.

Entry65/17 I felt so horny today and I fantasized being sexed up on the bed multiple times I could imagine my back being touched and then the whole process of making love. It hurt for sure. But it was an absolute release. Once again my sexual feelings were at a peak. I could feel my boobs being grabbed and touched. This was much stronger than the conqueror fantasies I had. I really want this to last. It's like I'm made to crumble into my absolute feminine self and I feel helpless, nothing but to give in. He makes me feel like that.

Entry64/17 I also have slavery based sexual fantasies. Like I want to be a slave. I want to be treated like a slave. I feel a sense of satisfaction when I'm treated like a slave. That I want to be kept in captivity and be raped. Yea those rape fantasies Back again. I want to be extremely submissive.

Entry63/17 He was /is like an angel. He came into my heart and stole me from myself. I can't even think straight. He is all over my thoughts. He was giving me such a hard time by being all over me

Entry62/17 By that time I had given into him.. He was being so loving. When he said he wanted to kiss me on my forehead, I instantly felt like he wanted to kiss me on my lips. And I was already drawn by the overwhelming attention he gave me. And when he went away I missed him pretty badly. And so I just gave up and gave in to his affections. I started having strong feelings for him. I felt loved and wanted. I also felt like I had no escape. A certain romantic helplessness. He had almost surrounded me on all sides by his power After a week, I had almost deeply fallen in love. I just could not understand what was happening.

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