Tyler Robinson

Recorded 3rd video. I was very depressed while recording this one. I made it 2 hours ago. I was crying discussing my mental health struggles.

Video testing

I have better resources now. One is video making which I always wanted to do for my ventings. And second is journaling extensively. I'm going to journal a lot more from now. I have understood that this is the key. A big fat journal. Also I'll participate in the forum but not too often. I'm also resolving a lot of confusion and conflicts along the way. *pats my back in honor.

All I see is a strong sense of low self worth. Your fundamental worth is not dependent on what others think about you. The moment you'll realize that the better things will be. In this moment you're giving way too power, value and importance to other people in a way that what they say is immediately threatening to your inner core, ego and sense of self. Work on your mentality. Also there could be a component of self judgement. You could be judging yourself harshly on the inside without actually realizing that you are doing this subconsciously. Release yourself, realize that being a human comes with a package of imperfections and flaws and being at the lower end of the social hierarchy is sometimes a blessing because life can be very simple at these levels with less competition and less fake people. There's a lot of psychopathic people at the top who crave sucess and money and do so in unethical ways. Also do gratitude journaling and see what you can be grateful for that you already got. Godspeed.

Today a thought popped up in my mind and it said — large journals. Large large journals.

When something intense happens in my life, that's exactly when life shows me a positive turn. Something upsetting happens and life shows a new door the same moment.

I was going through a lot of stress while recording the video above.

Recorded 3rd video. I was very depressed while recording this one. I made it 2 hours ago. I was crying discussing my mental health struggles.

Once again I want to be in a dream.. Once again I want to be in another world, another reality. Once again I want to escape the mess of everyday reality and go into a mode where my reality is reality and nothing more. I want to be away from the ugliness of life. I want to be poor. I want to be simple I want to be loved. I want to be like a child I don't want the pressures of life. I don't want hate.

Your body gets into emergency preparedness. It's a very very physiologically demanding. That chronic stress hurts you. Suppresses brain function. You'll develop cancer.

Because he is shaming my preference by calling it sexist. When I'm equally entitled to my preference just as he is.

Do your parents feel the same, as in they don't like it either? What about your siblings? Often our likes and dislikes are genetically influenced

What emotion comes up when you eat?

In my opinion, Ye's best creative piece is the song Heartless. Sung from his heart Shows a man's feelings when he is hurt by a woman. Made me cry lol. The lyrics are bomb. Heartless Song by Ye Lyrics In the night I hear 'em talk The coldest story ever told Somewhere far along this road He lost his soul to a woman so heartless How could you be so heartless? Oh, how could you be so heartless? How could you be so, cold as the winter wind when it breeze, yo Just remember that you talkin' to me though You need to watch the way you talkin' to me, yo I mean after all the things that we've been through I mean after all the things we got into Ayo, I know of some things that you ain't told me Ayo, I did some things, but that's the old me And now you wanna get me back and you gon' show me So you walk around like you don't know me You got a new friend, well, I got homies But in the end it's still so lonely In the night I hear 'em talk The coldest story ever told Somewhere far along this road He lost his soul to a woman so heartless How could you be so heartless? Oh, how could you be so heartless? How could be so Dr. Evil? You bringin' out a side of me that I don't know I decided we weren't gon' speak so Why we up 3:00 a.m. on the phone? Why do she be so mad at me for? Homie, I don't know, she's hot and cold I won't stop, won't mess my groove up 'Cause I already know how this thing go You run and tell your friends that you're leaving me (hey) They say that they don't see what you see in me (hey) You wait a couple months then you gon' see (hey) You'll never find nobody better than me In the night I hear 'em talk The coldest story ever told Somewhere far along this road He lost his soul to a woman so heartless How could you be so heartless? Oh, how could you be so heartless? Talk and talk and talk and talk Baby let's just knock it off They don't know what we been through They don't know 'bout me and you So I got something new to see And you just gon' keep hatin' me And we just gon' be enemies I know you can't believe I could just leave it wrong And you can't make it right I'm gon' take off tonight Into the night In the night I hear 'em talk The coldest story ever told Somewhere far along this road He lost his soul to a woman so heartless How could you be so heartless? Oh, how could you be so heartless?

I want to spend this time partying and dancing.

@Max_V because I look up to my man or potential boyfriend as my daddy figure. I want to see my daddy cry so I can know why he is crying and nurse him. But I don't want my daddy to be a loser and sit and do nothing. It will make me feel uninsured, helpless. Because my daddy is my pillar. (replace word daddy with man) It was the best way to explain how we women feel inside. Women are conditioned by birth, biology, environment and evolution to see men as a provider, protector, bodyguard, caretaker and a daddy figure. A father places his daughter's hand into the hands of the groom. It has a meaning to it. It means now her life is in the hands of the husband who is her Lord and caretaker. He wants his daughter to be in safe hands because he is too old to care for her. This responsibility is transferred to the husband. You might find this outdated but you cannot remove biological, cultural and evolutionary conditioning of thousands of years. A woman does not want to see that her bodyguard is weak and cannot solve his problems. It's like a child seeing their parents crying all the time. It can make the child feel terrorized and weak. Seeing a man break down signals impending doom, terror, fear, a falling pillar. A woman feels like she is losing her sense of support and survival, she feels scared and tensed, frightened and cannot cope with the feeling. She might not dump the guy but she will live in constant state of fear, she will not hate him but she might lose attraction. Her attraction to a man is fundamentally rooted in how protected she feels with him. She will no longer be able to dream of him as a protective figure. That kills attraction. It will be similar to you waking up one morning and seeing your girlfriend change into Big Foot Ape. Attraction killed instantly. Like that.

Yea this is how I would imagine it. I wouldn't want my man to dump everything on me because I also expect him to show some spine. At the same time he can be vulnerable with me enough so I can help him. But I will feel somewhat uncomfortable if he used me as an emotional tampon. It's like kids who expect their parents to share their struggles with them but at the same time they don't want the parents to lose responsibility as parents

You're the best example of misogyny. You have zero respect for women based on all trash threads you open to put down women. Dude. Women are the cradle of society. They give children to the world. They go through labor. They are the womb. She gives you milk for which you're forever indebted. And I'm a WOMAN. Listen to this song to learn how to respect women. If you can't be grateful to women, then you should never talk about women again. You have no right.

My God. I would have been absolutely delighted if my boyfriend was sharing his mental struggles with me. In fact my ex was shying and not wanting to share with me and it caused me immense frustration. Because I could not help him with his struggles, no opportunity for me to connect deeper. I also felt like I wasn't made a part of his inner world. I begged him a dozen to tell me what he felt but he just wouldn't. I can't speak of other women but I absolutely love a guy telling me what's hurting him. That's the only best opportunity for me to be able to help him and show him I care.

I feel like this is a low key virginity shaming.

I like the idea of someone saving themselves for me. Call me selfish. But it's damn cute.

Ok I'll try my best to explain this correlation with whatever is coming up in my mind right now. Intelligence comes from the necessity to know and understand the truth. It's the ability to see the truth in everything. Lies can be many. But truth can be only one. Intelligence is dealing with reality. Hate may win some battles. But love wins in the end. Dishonesty and lies may win the battles but truth wins in the end. Intelligence means having foresight. The ability to see what's to come. Intelligence will realize that dishonesty can only take you so far. Whereas truth is eventually going to be the winner since you cannot fight truth or go against it. An intelligent mind knows this through foresight. Intelligence involves open mindedness. The ability to entertain all perspectives to find the actual truth. This open mindedness comes with the courage to accept criticism, this too with the ultimate intent to know the truth. Courage means fearlessness in the face of backlash. An intelligent mind is not afraid of backlash because it's not concerned with ego, it's not concerned with being proven false, it's not concerned with being right, so it is without fear. We are dishonesty when we fear something like judgement or backlash. An intelligent mind does not fear so it is carefree and so it doesn't need to lie or be dishonest. Dishonesty comes from fearing an outcome, the desire to manipulate and impress. An intelligent mind doesn't see the need to manipulate, cover up or impress. An intelligent mind doesn't see the need to hide itself or any other aspect simply because such hiding and lying will cause confusion to the listener and create a lack of transparency between the speaker and the listener. Such confusion can cause the listener to arrive at the truth through dishonest means. When the listener will find that the truth they were lead to was based on lies and dishonesty, they will discard the truth after feeling betrayed and cheated. An intelligent mind will not risk the truth being discarded in such a manner. They will not risk losing the way to truth on a cheap lie. If a woman lied to you and later on told the truth, it will be difficult for everyone to believe her truth, even her truth will be taken as a lie. In the process of fooling others she has fooled herself. An intelligent mind is wise and will not fall in such traps and make such mistakes. An intelligent mind knows that trust is the foundation of everlasting harmony. In order to create harmony with the listener you need to cultivate and communicate trust. You cannot cultivate or communicate trust with lies and dishonesty.

Huge huge huge huge difference. I know you're looking at wanting virgins from a sexist perspective. I'm looking at it from a morally virtuous perspective. Leonardo wants it because of superficial reasons, he thinks only those women are beautiful. A Mormon guy who wants a virgin girl might not think the same way. He is not basing it on beauty but on moral virtue. For some people, not randomly sleeping with someone and preserving oneself for the one and only is a sign of commitment, loyalty and moral virtue and nothing to do with superficial cravings like Leonardo.

Why does it have to be always be a judgement thing? Maybe it's a projection to imagine that they are judging with body counts. Maybe it's just a matter of preference. Some people feel dirty having sex with something that's already been touched. That's a visceral reaction. It's an automatic response, not necessarily emerging from shaming someone. It could indicate possessiveness of someone's body. For example, take my example. When my ex bf told me that he had been with another before me and he had it, I felt automatic disgust and a bit upset. Because I wanted to be his first. It did not come from judging other men who have high body counts. It's simply me wanting to feel special as the first one. A sense of possessiveness that he should belong to me and everything of him should be available to me before anyone. It's the same kind of possessiveness and jealousy you experience when you see your partner flirting with someone. I personally think that wanting a virgin is not such a bad idea. If it indicates possessiveness, I like that kind of possessiveness in a relationship, it makes me feel wanted, possessed and belonged.

I also like the Australian National Anthem.