About three months ago I had an LSD experience that has left me a bit traumatized. I've tripped on LSD dozens of times on higher doses before, but this particular trip was the strangest. I took 4 doses and smoked a few blunts throughout the trip.
After about 20 minutes of taking the acid, I could feel a wave of unease coming. It was abnormally strong. So strong that I couldn't stand anymore and so I laid down and listened to some music. That calmed and relieved me down a bit, but the wave was still coming in strong.
During the peak of the trip, my reality was fluctuating between pleasure and pain. I was having visions and imagining a life of extraordinary pleasure and then a life of excruciating pain. I began to think that all of my friends old entities, old gods that were waiting for me to wake up.
The most unsettling part of this entire experience was the feeling that I was inside of a simulation. I kept thinking about life lines. I would have glimpses of really dark realities where I would be raped and tortured for thousands of years inside of a dungeon and then a few moments later I would have an unexpected sense of bliss where I would see rainbows and a future where I'd be creating music and spreading love.
Also, I would very clearly become aware of alternate realities, where the characters of my life would do very unexpected actions that they wouldn't do in my reality. The characters of my life all seem to blend into one energy. The idea of old souls come to mind. Everybody that was around me during the trip, felt like a very old entity who had taken form as my friends. My friends all felt really old, beyond their physical form. And i was realizing just how much physical forms we had all lived through. We had all gone through many many forms of life to end up where we were.
The entire trip was extremely unsettling. And I haven't been able to get it off my mind. Sometimes I find myself questioning what's real in my every day life. It's not a pleasant feeling. I feel like i might be delusional. I keep remembering the vivid emotions that encompassed that trip and i find it really strange. I have a deep feeling that there's something really weird going on but can't put my finger on it let alone explain it. I'm just been very in awe after this trip and would appreciate some guidance and experiences. I wanna know if i'm deluding myself or if i really did tap into something strange.
