Emerald

If a man looks like Quasimodo, he will have issues attracting women no matter how high quality his personality is. Harsh but true. Looks can be a deal-breaker for women too. But priority-wise, looks are generally lower on the totem pole for women than they are for men. If a woman is given the choice between an average looking guy who has many great qualities and a super-hot guy who's a hot mess; chances are the average looking guy is more likely to catch her attention. I say chances are because attraction in never guaranteed because it is based on emotions, but more likely. But if Quasimodo with a heart of gold, pocket full of money, and all the best personality traits asked a girl out, she's going to say no unless she is equally physically unattractive, has very low self-esteem, or is only interested in money or social status. Biologically speaking, the drive is to carry on your genes through future generations. Unattractive father = unattractive sons and daughters = less options for them to reproduce (especially for daughters). Nature is harsh like that. The best thing a man can do is to make sure he's well-groomed, nicely dressed, and on top of his life.

I fit this description, but I'm still in resistance to it. I have trouble with trusting my intuitions and sharing my sensitivities openly with people.

My threats to productivity are listed below in order of intensity 1. Too much time daydreaming/fantasizing/pacing/thinking - I spend a lot of time in my head playing out scenarios and ideas 2. Not setting a limit on internet time 3. Not keeping a to-do list or schedule 4. Negative self-talk regarding my productivity 5. Chocolate and other sugary foods 6. Vanity and excessive care about the way I look 7. Waking up at 8:00 when I have to get my daughter ready for school by 8:30. I should be getting up an hour earlier to get things done around the house before my family wakes up. 8. Thinking "I should really do this thing that will only take me 20 seconds to do... nah." I have a resistance to productivity itself.

On closer inspection, our experiences consist entirely of our perceptions of sight, sound, touch, taste, smell, and thought (and awareness itself, even though it is difficult to perceive). I'm tempted to put emotion in there too, but I'm pretty sure that is just a combination of touch and thought, giving the illusion of a single perception when it is really two perceptions experienced in combination. So, anything that we experience, happens within these faculties... unless I'm mistaken. In this way, reality is really simple despite the fact that the content within these fields of awareness seems very complex. These are also separate fields of awareness that have no empirical relationship to one another, other than the fact that they are happening in the same field of awareness. Where do I go from here? What else could I notice that I'm not yet aware of? Any contemplation questions, comments, or thoughts would be much appreciated.

All of these words are often labels used synonymously for referring to the divine mystery of creation. They are ultimately labels and metaphors for this phenomena that is impossible to convey through language. But they are also used in different ways too. Sometimes existence just means that something exists. Sometimes God means Zues, Thor, or a man in the clouds. Sometimes the universe refers to space with planets and stars in it. So, the words are confusing.

Thank you. I'm hoping that I'm at least pointed in the right direction of "the door" at least. When I was 15, I learned to draw realistically in somewhat short order because I was able to perceive my sight separate from my concept of what I was seeing. Up until that point, I might as well have been blind because I didn't ever see the world for what it was. I saw my concept of the world. I'm hoping that by applying the same process to my other senses and self-concept to see if it is enough to wake me up. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Thoughts come up from nowhere. I don't have to believe them because they aren't 'me' nor do I control them. They are just a perception.

@jjer94 Great article. I'll bookmark it for later to read the other parts. @Leo Gura I didn't think of either of these things. They 'seem' separate as though they happen in different "dimensions" almost. But maybe not. I will contemplate on this. I will also attempt to experience them separate from my notions of sense perception. Good advice. Those sneaky little mental constructs are going down.

- I experience other people visually as shapes imbued with colors on a flat screen of more colors with no delineation from other things in my field of awareness. Sound-wise they are just sounds that I identify as voices, footsteps, clothing rustling, etc. Tactually, they are just sensations that my thoughts associate label with their image. My thoughts imbue these things with meaning relating to my perceptions of who they are. - Sounds aren't coming from or going anywhere. They just are. They are just sounds. Words like vibration and energy want to pop up but that is a label. There is a lot of change in the sounds. No tone keeps a solid sameness. It's moving. Sounds aren't separate from one another, even if I can identify that they are coming from different sources within my field of awareness. The sound of typing, airplanes, television fuzz are all mixed together. There is no distance between them or delineation between them. My mind gives me a black image with little vibrations-things in it because it's trying to conceptualize. I have been considering that idea recently that I am the backdrop for all the content of my perceptions. The assumptions that come along with solipsism have been getting in the way though. It ignites my mind so that it comes up with many concepts and ideas that I get hemmed into. How do I move past conceptual understanding of this for a real experience? Any other questions to ask?

I'll use these for later contemplation but I'll answer them now too, to see what it yields. - I am in the content of my thoughts when I ask myself this. I imagine an idealized picture of me sitting where I am. I feel a tensing in my shoulders and chest in relation to my mind's image of myself and I feel an identification with that image. I feel extra tense when I imagine someone calling my name. A dumbfounded image of myself comes up. It feels as though my sight is myself too. Like there is a soul looking out through binoculars. When I shift my awareness to this space, there is no self in that space. - All of my sense perceptions are moving and maybe a bit static-like. The field of awareness itself has little 'dots' (for want of a better word) swimming around. This is true with sight, sound, and touch anyway. - I'm not sure if the external is real. All I know for sure are my perceptions in the present moment, because my experience of the "external world" is couched entirely in my inner experience. So, if there is anything external to me (which may or may not be) I am not perceiving it now, and thus it resides in the realm of thought-content and beliefs. -I'm not sure what you mean by others.

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Also, what she said. This applies too.

All people have masculine and feminine energy in varying degrees. No one is just feminine or just masculine. There are plenty of exceptions, but generally men are mostly masculine and women are mostly feminine. It takes both to make a whole person. Even an extremely feminine woman like Marylin Monroe, has a reasonable amount of masculine energy. Women who repress their masculine side are the way that you describe. But that is because the shadow feminine takes its place. The shadow side of femininity is irrational, fretful, stagnating, passive-aggressive, manipulative, clingy, bitchy, high-maintenance, whiny, self-deprecating, and soaked in victim's mentality. Men who repress their masculinity will have the same issues with shadow femininity. But this is less common in men. But all women have a masculine side in varying degrees. So, there are extremely feminine women who have an integrated masculine side, who don't have these issues. It's a matter of integrating one's natural masculine and feminine traits regardless of gender. Women tend to either cling to femininity and repress our masculinity or cling to masculinity and repress our femininity. This polarization is a reaction to social values, causing emotional distress and self-hatred from a young age, like trying to make a square peg fit into a round hole. Men who repress their feminine side have a different set of problems. They have shadow masculinity, which entails violence, aggression, intimidation, emotionlessness, disrespect for life, callousness, greed, unhealthy competition, exploitation, extortion, extreme hegemony, monopolization, and us v. them thinking. Women who repress their femininity will have the same issues. The most powerful people in the world have a BIG issue with feminine repression. So, fear not, feminine women can have high consciousness traits too if they haven't repressed their masculinity. But there are many women who are controlled by shadow femininity. So, for them, integration is needed for emotional and psychological health.

Low

Thank you. I'll definitely check out this list.

Only the ones who are extra sweet. Sincerely, The Sweetest Pineapple EVER!!!!!

The real question is, If pineapples didn't exist, would god still exist? Sincerely, Pineapple #2,375,175,986,965,876

I had two enlightenment experience (artificially induced) six years ago. Since then I've spent five years studying into various spiritual and psychological practices. I found Leo's enlightenment videos about a year ago and started studying into that as well. So, my knowledge comes from personal experience, contemplation, and research. Also, I used to smoke when I was a teenager, and I think I know the experience that you're referring to.

I would say that this isn't an enlightenment experience but that it drew your attention toward certain aspects of your reality in a different way than you're used to experiencing them. So, you probably were receptive to more sensory stimuli that your mind would normally edit out for ease of understanding, because of the different way of processing. So, it probably got past the conceptual mind in greater degree than normal, but probably wasn't an enlightenment experience.

As in, there is only now? I guess we'll never know.

This is good. My experiences have definitely prejudiced me in many ways and speaking to people on the forum has really started me thinking in that direction. In those moments, I "BELIEVE" I was experiencing truth. It was certainly a novel, spiritual experience, but more than that was an extreme degree of clarity and ability to see what had always been there. I had no fear and no self to be threatened, so I was able to be aware of a lot more because no truth could harm me. But now there is only a memory.. which only exists in the realm of belief and imagination. So, there is suffering, struggling, and grasping to get back to a remembered feeling. Trying to escape from fear and a rejection of the present moment for want of an enlightened future moment. Thank you.

I have had two enlightenment experiences, and they were nothing shy of Heaven on Earth. They just weren't permanent and were catalyzed by an artificial means. But they closely match the descriptions given from others who have had an experience of ego-transcendence. So, I'm no expert, but I do have experience to back up my assertions. But don't believe me... seek it for yourself if it's important to you. Or "stay in the park", if that is what you want. Either way, it doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. Do what is right for you.

I've wondered the same thing. Assumptions will come up, like I'm supposed to be listening for a little voice to tell me something. Then thoughts will come up trying to rationalize. Then frustration and resistance. Then panic at nothing coming up... am I wasting my time... maybe I should try something else... maybe I'm doing it wrong. My advice is to just keep asking it without trying to control the experience and maybe some wordless insight will break through or maybe that isn't how it happens at all. Try to clear away your assumptions and expectations and just commit to the meditation. Trust the experience, is my advice. Do as I say, not as I do.

So much this.

Well said.