Joseph Maynor

I’m sure you’re giving your goals a second look. That’s what happens to me around my birthday each year. Going from 39 to 40 last time was brutal for me. I think I grew more in 1 year than my whole life so far. 39 was my most growth year so far. The looming of 40 did something in me. Kind of a mid-life crisis thing happening in there too. There’s something about turning 40 that’s a real mindf*ck. Subconsciously, you realize you’re not really a kid anymore. You can’t continue to be one either! It’s a mandatory growth point. Or at least it functioned that way for me. It’s like the gods said — time to grow up now whether you’re ready to or not. Happy birthday haha. It’s profound huh? I can say that I’ve been happily 40 now for 4 months! In your 30’s you’re still given a little leeway to be a kid and to be at sea about your life. At 40 though you’re expected to have a few things figured out about life. Mother Nature will haunt you like a concerned demon to grow past childhood. It’s like she says — times up! School’s out! You’re grown now and you’re expected to act like it. You’ve pissed and frittered half your life away — now what are you really gonna do? Like that. It’s a wake up call — a forced transition from boy to man. Time to do whatever work you’re gonna do before you die. No more waiting around. No more time to piss and fritter away. No more slack being given to screw up like kids receive. You’re expected to be past that. You’re an adult at age 40. A real adult. And you’re expected to act like one! In your 30’s, you’re still given leeway to screw up and learn. You’re still sort of young in your 30’s. At 40, you need to act grown or it’s just contrary to nature. You’ll realize you’re gonna die a loser if you don’t finally shape up in certain ways. And that’s real, not something you can put off any longer. There’s no more time to waste! It’s now or never at 40. The training-wheels are released whether you want them to come off or not — and the bike speeds up too!

That was a good explanation. Thanks for posting it. Here's another great video

Realize that you are part of a large, non-linear, interconnected system of reality. And that system is always in homeostasis. Changing that system sustainably requires consciousness, awareness, and patience. Growth is non-linear. Make Personal Development and growth a side-hobby in your life. There are things you can do, but they’re different from what you think. Embrace the challenge of learning about and optimizing the system of your life.

Personal Development is more advanced than Enlightenment is. Enlightenment is merely a prerequisite to doing advanced Personal Development work. Not many people grok this.

That’s the fundamental question of personal development: I got a handful of nice goals but I can’t bring myself to do them. That’s what you’re here to learn. The answer is not simple. The answer is you gotta understand the system you are trying to change before you can sustainably change it. And the system doesn’t work like we think it does. The system is a very odd animal indeed.

That is a great video. I can tell Leo is growing a lot. It’s nice to capture stuff so others can review it. We all benefit from each other’s insights. https://www.actualized.org/insights/mindfucked-in-hawaii

Take your time Leo. Stuff will settle anew. 2 week solo vacations are great for growth! Next time go to a foriegn country that is totally different from the US and that will rearrange your mental furniture even more. I’m past due for one of those myself. I wanna go to India or Southeast Asia next. And make it a 2 week solo vacation just like you did too. https://www.actualized.org/insights/mindfucked-in-hawaii

Watch all Leo’s videos up to but not including the first one on Enlightenment.

Quine said that it's a pragmatic assumption he makes in order to preserve the causal system which makes Science possible. It's not that he denies subjective reality, he just takes a skeptical view of all stories about the mental. There's a lot of bullshit in our theories of the subjective. A lot of Philosophers remain touch and go regarding such theories. It's not that they deny the subjective -- they are just tentative with stories about it. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Willard_Van_Orman_Quine

Keep up the good work. You work hard, that's good. What you work on is what you improve. Personal Development is a lifelong path. Growth has no limit. You're a trooper! That's good. You're been growing right alongside me for as long as I can remember now. I pay attention to things that are going on. It's noticeable.

Right here!

Make sure you get enough sleep. That’s the #1 priority. Enforce it.

I like the first line of the Tao Te Ching. So instructive here. The Tao that can be told is not the eternal Tao; the name that can be named is not the eternal name. The Tao is that which has no name.

I don’t like the word. I find it unnecessary. I like the word reality.

You are the unchanging Awareness. Unchanging Awareness has no worry. What causes suffering is the false identification of unchanging Awareness with the changing Dream.

Starting to work on scheduling is what I would recommend. But look at it from a systems thinking point of view. What you're already doing is a system. So, what you want to do is start to refine that system, not toss it or pretend that it isn't there. Systems thinking is very powerful for scheduling. Your life is a system. A proper system will make sure your needs get met, and that elements of the system that are not so good can be replaced over time by elements that are better.

You need to slowly integrate some organization into the system of your life. That’s the way to do it.

I think a system always wants to reach homeostasis. Instead of fighting homeostasis, experiment with replacing less healthy ways to meet needs with healthier ways. Homeostasis is a given. What you want to do is change the elements the system is relying on to achieve homeostasis. Take a daily alcohol addiction for example. How can the system of your life achieve homeostasis without daily alcohol consumption? What is something that can replace the alcohol in the system? What is the alcohol doing to help achieve homeostasis in the system? That’s what you wanna locate. And this will be particular to a specific system.

Look at this from a systems thinking perspective. What you do is what meets all your needs. So, don’t try and radically change things. Work from within the system to try to wire in healthier replacements to what you are already doing. Work slowly. Don’t try to dump the table over. What you are doing already has a system homeostasis to it. You want to effectuate change by working from a bubble inside the system and slowly work outward. If you start to dump things too hastily, you’re gonna get a huge backlash.

Sultan has a negative connotation to me. I don’t know where that comes from. I think something like dictator when I hear it.

Enlightenment work is the cure for neuroses. Hands down. I still remember the day when I realized my neuroses died off and I was like -- woah! There's a post on here of me talking about it after it happened. One of the signs you are awakening is your neuroses go bye-bye. See? I wasn't joking! This was 10 months ago.

Explore it!

Just because you give up Ego doesn't mean your life has to become like some kind of monk. You will still do lots of things after you become awakened. You just won't be striving after them for egoic reasons. You'll be much more grounded and calm with life. You won't be neurotic about things. You're not gonna fall off the face of the earth after awakening.