Abi

I am an engineering student. I think that every semester there's comes a point where maybe you fall off the wagon with studying (for whatever reason) or the material just becomes too difficult for you to keep up and you become overwhelmed. In past semesters, I have been able to come back, but, admittedly, last semester I was not able to make up for it. I am afraid that that is going to happen again this semester, but the stakes are extremely high for me right now concerning my degree. The first few weeks of classes went amazingly, but about the past week or so I have found myself behind, unable to focus, and feeling too anxious to work. Do you have any suggestions on overcoming this and making up for it? (applicable for anyone who does knowledge work) Thanks.

take advantage of the fact that your life purpose is a creative work. why couldn't you integrate the two?

I have a personal question that I would like some opinions on, and I hope that the read will provoke some thought and possibly help others as well. I will preface by saying that am new to self-actualization. I have only seriously committed to self-development in this sense in the past month or so, but I have been challenging myself and thinking about improvement over the past four years, admittedly with little direction (external nor internal). In the past, when I have made great strides of improvement (terminating an abusive relationship, quitting the use of recreational drugs, etc.) it was done hugely by leaving the groups of people that I was involved with. For the present, I am considering taking what I am considering a "vow of solitude," although it is not a true vow of solitude by any means. I am considering terminating or relaxing the relationships that I currently have and avoiding the creation of new relationships for some period of time for several reasons. One, in the same way that in order to avoid harmful behavior you must avoid surrounding yourself with the people that you have built relationships with in the past that were based on the practice of such harmful behavior, I feel that improving in many facets of life (work, academic, and self-development) is quite difficult when I am surrounding myself with people who have little to no ambitions or drive. Please recognize, though that these are the type of people I feel most comfortable around, as I come from a world of low ambitions, addiction, mental illness, abuse, and poverty. (This information was include purely to provide the reader with context). Two, to build on one, in order to self-actualize, I understand that it is important that you surround yourself with people that have similar values to you and who challenge you to become a better person, as you do them. The issue is, I see a gap between these two states. I feel that I need to commit to, potentially, years of work before I will be prepared to enter friendships or a romantic relationship that includes these qualities. Three, I am currently a college student and I plan to spend some time traveling after graduation, prior to graduate school or entering the industry. This is another topic in itself, but I feel that having deep relationships (especially those that are unhealthy) will prevent me from following such passions (although I accept and am comfortable with the fact that any future plans I have are subject to change which, humorously, is another topic in itself as well). This "vow of solitude" will include the minimum maintenance of relationships with those such as those of coworkers and that of my immediate family. It will include the complete termination of social media (excluding youtube, which will be used purposefully and carefully for work and not for entertainment). The commitment to not have sex, build romantic relationships, or build friendships (again, I don't feel that I am presently prepared to build others up). Most importantly, it will include the commitment to entertain, comfort, and consult myself. This will be for some period of time, which has not been defined as I do not have measurable goals. I hope that the result of this will be better self-acceptance, a more independent being/spirit, the liberation of emotional concerns regarding partners and relationships (to clarify, I don't mean the liberation of emotion concerns regarding others in general, I mean specifically concerns about the existence and state of my relationships), the ability to enter healthy and deep relationships in the future, a comfort with myself and my mind, healthy and purposeful practices and habits, and the development of myself as an entity with values and passions. I would really appreciate some opinions from a few outside sources, especially those who are seasoned and have similar values to myself, which brings me here!

My environment (home and work) are the things that are keeping me most "stuck" and always have. I feel as if I start making progress and then am constantly interrupted and exposed to negativity and a lack of support. I am uncertain on how to get into the environment that I want to be in, although in August I am moving to a new city. (I know that my environment isn't necessarily the cause of struggles, but more my reaction to it is the cause. So I am nervous that this will not go away even with the move). Thanks.

Personally, I feel that sleep is extremely important. It is something that I struggle with, but, for me, not getting enough sleep causes me to have weaker self-discipline and willingness to experience discomfort for growth. Not to mention concentration, patience, memory, learning, etc. are all adversely effected with sleep deprivation. As an engineering student, I have come to realize that we all have the same amount of time in our day, and it is important to allocate it. You can include everything in a day that is important to you. I guarantee that you can find a way to fit the yoga and meditation back in with religious time management and schedule adjustments (if possible). Another thing to consider is to downsize the length of your morning routine, while still retaining it. I think that in order to get the most out of your classes and practices and to maintain good health, getting enough sleep is imperative. Note that "enough sleep" is different for every person. For me its 7-9 hours. For others it's 4-6. And for others yet it is 12-14. Know yourself. You can try to cut back on sleep, but I suggest keeping a journal or tracker where you can document how you feel mentally and physically as well as your performance in whatever it is you are working on and decide from there how important 8 hours of sleep is for you. furthermore, note that sometimes staying up for 3 extra hours to complete a task when you are exhausted is unproductive because you could have simply gone to sleep at a decent time, then gotten up feeling well rested and finished the task in 30 minutes. Also understand how sleep cycles work, you may be waking yourself up in the middle of deep sleep which is why you feel so sleepy with under 8 hours. Try to experiment with precisely when you go to bed and get up to find the optimal amount.

Absolutely. Thank you.