clytaemnestra

Not actually. I'd prefer having someone to listen to me when I feel emotional and to cuddle with me, than to have sex. When you're an attractive woman, it's super easy to find sex. But to have someone who would listen to your shit and whom you can open your soul - very rare.

Erm.. if I'd been cuddling with a guy in bed, I'd also be surprised if he wants something more in a sexual way, because I think it's not men's thing to initiate anything more. I find it disrespectful, because we know you're always up for sex, leave us women to initiate, so to avoid awkwardness of "erm, I didn't mean it that way, I love you, but as a brother". People cuddle sometimes as friends, give each other massage and so on. It's actually friendzone and it doesn't sound odd to me.

I also slept in the same bed with guys. Totally normal. That was my first thought, super cute dog.

Why's wrong to relax sometimes? Same like with the food, to prepare yourself delicious dinner once per week and enjoy it and have a chilly and nice evening? If he's obsessed, that's different thing, but I don't see any reason sometimes not to enjoy in a satisfaction and relief sex, food, nice conversations, hobbies whatever can bring to you.

Where did you read this sentence? I didn't say so. The guy was talking in general, we were talking about in on the same day when we met for the first time, thus with you part I don't see anywhere.

@Ry4n, thank you, but there has been an update in the story, I updated it recently in posts.

Well, I don't plan on enlightening him on what he misses.

Dudette!

No, I didn't even mention it, it was our first meeting. I agree with all said, I'm just thinking like, maybe he wants to be clear from the very beginning that nothing's gonna happen and I misinterpreted it. I mean, we girls change our mind very often when it to friendzone comes and since we have more options (at least it seems like to me) we kinda are not afraid of commitments, I mean like I've never heard any girl friend being afraid of commitment, so for me it's unknown field and it happen first time, so I'm still confused, but it's good anyways, I'm learning something new about men.

Yea, but that never crossed my mind as an idea anyways. I'll give time time and see how it goes. I guess.

Thank you. I actually never thought that it's an excuse to tell me that he doesn't like me for something more than FWB. Interesting point, I should think about it.

@Christian, @kyle barnett, @Toby, @Principium Nexus, @Life Coach, @Nahm, I just wanted to update with the situation two months after. First of, thank you for your answers, they've been very useful! I read it on time, but I was all over the place for a longer period, so it took me a while to get on my feet again. So, in short, I was still depressive, I had a shitty non-paid job, I got fired, my project collapsed, I was under a pressure by my family, friends, lived in a super-small place where everything reminded me how fucked up I was.. I talked with a friend of mine and he proposed me to move abroad just to change surrounding and due to better opportunities. It was a long way, in two months I sent over 50 applications, had 10+ interviews and I almost quitted, but somehow I just accepted that I'm a fucked up loser and the only way to go out of this state of mind is to work on my life, thus I was persistent and I believed I'll find something to start with. After 2 months of torture called trying to find a job, I got a job! It's astonishing that I found a job in a another country although I don't speak their language, the job was in my native language that's like useful for nothing and no one except expats speaks it abroad, but they needed one speaker and I was picked up out of many. And the job is account management, what I like doing and my R.I.P. failed project was in. Still can't believe it! I thought I'm not even qualified to wash dishes, but I ended up in a company where my skills are recognized and where I can grow. Then I realized how low opinion I had on myself, I worth a way much than I thought. I started working and I feel better than ever! Now it's funny to me how much I was worrying about some stuff I don't give a shit anymore. My confidence came back and I feel overall very good.

So, I just started working 10 days ago in a new company and I met very cute guy. We went to some drinks (company) and he was standing next to me in a tram and approached me. We met, talked a bit about work and company and the whole night we were talking together. We got into deeper conversations and he told me he's afraid of commitment, he's only up to friends with benefits. I asked him why, he told me, because he's afraid that he'll start a new relationship, realize that the girl is not "the one" and he'll hurt a girl by breaking up the relationship and it'd hurt him, because he hates hurting feelings of another people. That night we only cuddled and tomorrow and he said no strings attached. He told me he doesn't like being with someone just for fun and fooling another girls and he takes love very seriously. Tomorrow 3 of us met, we had a nice time together, we were laughing a lot and then two of us spent some time alone, but non-sexually. The more I get to know him, the more we both realize that we have a plenty of stuff in common and we're quite similar and have same viewpoints and values. Now at work we sometimes meet during the breaks and talk all together, but nothing special. I contacted him on Fb and asked on Sunday if he has plans, but he saw the message too late when he already got home from gym and apologized, said he's sorry for missing the hangout and told me we could figure out something during the week. It's week now, but he doesn't call nor contact me. We just during the breaks talk all together and that's it. Or friends-thing discuss. Can I get some male input in this story? I, as a girl, was never afraid of a relationship, I don't get it why is he (26y/o)? Is there anything to be done or just to forget about it? Does he only say it or really means that I have no chance and I should forget about him? OK, for me FWB is okay, but since we have planty stuff in common, I'm not sure that I could be so open and not to mind if he has another "friends" for sex or if he sees me just as any friend.. So, while I'm still at the beginning and not attached, what to do? To break the friendship or to see what comes next?

Once upon a time I was also into mastering sex and I can say, men I was with after I learned some tips & tricks, were respecting me more for it and were positively surprised that girls are not ashamed of their sexuality and not just sitting and waiting to be put in bed with legs in air and waiting for a man to finish everything. Exaggerating, but if someone has a lot of experience and every sex is the same, without trying something new, that's kinda it. Of course, I've met many conservative men (as my friends and family are) who think that they should be the second partner to every woman and that every woman was "saving herself" just for him, but I don't want to get involved with that kind of people nor they want with me. I think the best is to have more partners because every of them will teach you new style and you learn a lot about men there, and to have one who with you can learn a lot about yourself, what you like and what you don't like.

I'm 21 and recently I dated a man who's 34. It didn't lead to relationship, because he was less mature than me. He's still partying around without any intention to get out of the party phase and figure out what he wants of his life. Due to looks and behavior, I'd guess that he's 20 y/o student. So, as they say, the age doesn't define maturity.