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My thoughts on it. Imagine a military offensive aiming to kill all those that wish to self-actualize. Wouldn't there be those who are willing to fight to protect the right of others to have a chance to self-actualize? Is not killing members of the offensive equally depriving them of the chance to self-actualize? So both sides lose. The thing is there are offensives which just want something the other has, like land, or a valuable resource, and are willing to kill for it. The innocent, like our children, will be killed without a chance to grow up and see and accept the truth of this insanity. The real sad thing is that the governments use the innocent infants to do the killing. Ironically they are called infantry. As long as this world is greedy for validity of ego-self, there will always be wars. Always depriving others from awakening. I done six years in the RAAF. Got my instruments and avionics trades out of it. Luckily I missed any theaters of conflict. If one wishes to be in the military and avoid direct conflict, it is better to be an officer in the army, or a non-officer in the air-force. I took the later. The reasons are: In the army it is the infantry that fight, and the officers stay back and out of danger. In the navy, both officers and non-officers are in the same boat. There is no advantage here. In the air force it is the officers that fly the planes and non-officers stay back and out of danger.

Was able to figure out the dimensions of where the cable will run and the materials needed for making brackets to contain the pulley wheels. The towers are not yet secured to the bridge. Here I was just seeing how the towers will look in there place, and to check the gaps around the bumper rollers. I think it's looks promising.

One time only. Other experiences have taken its place since then. In the above case, the whole meditative approach was to cut out all sounds (first the birds in the trees, then dog barking down the street, etc, and my last cut was the traffic). Then suddenly in the silence, the veil and coolness went over my face and head.

@Salaam Your experiences with wind/gusts are many and different to my own. I am not sure what the wind/gusts are. My experience is only over my head, especially my face. It is as if my skin rolled off my body like a drape/veil. In its wake is a coolness. Much like slowly putting your head onto a pond of cool water. When this happens to me I then experience a state of mind where, as if, all questions, doubts, needs and wants become irrelevant. Some may call it nirvana.

The bridge span and boat will be moved by the use of pulley wheels and cable. I was not happy with the available pulley wheels, they are not narrow enough. So I decided to make my own by sweat-soldering washers together. I needed ten pulley wheels. This exercise brought back memories of me as a boy watching the neighbour doing some soldering in his backyard shed.

Hate to be a dull boy. But why not walk without distractions from your walking, seeing, feeling, smelling, hearing, tasting, the life you are walking through? I often go for a bicycle ride to the headlands to see all the activities of the port, river, ocean, birds in the air, lizards on the rocks, the odd snake, dolphins, stingrays, and turtles. Whales are now starting to travel north up the coast; trawlers coming in and out of port; people saying hello as I pass. And I also see people walking with earplugs listening to something and completely oblivious with everything I just wrote about. It amazes me how much they actually miss experiencing. It is as if they fear being with their own thoughts about the world they walk through.

Hello Jone. I am sure you will get some great tips from here, and from others as well. But don't forget to trust your inner Being of truth. Let yourself be led. Personally, I would not plan a whole year itinerary. I would just settle for the first part and see what unravels from there. Part of the opening up is to not hang on to a plan. There is nothing wrong in having a plan, but then let go of it. Don't worry about it, you know that you can follow a plan whenever you want to. But I believe it is best to not know exactly every step you take. About like-minded people? Don't worry about that either. It is also good to not find any along the way, it will resolve more clearly that you find to be true in your life (like a travelling hermit). Besides, you can always hook into the Internet and contact us. Start a journal here and share with us your experiences and changes in yourself.

Learn to listen, listen to learn.

@Loreena Simply, the mind is the byproduct of brain activity. Nobody can open the human body (brain included) and point at something and say "That there is the mind".

Completed the basic tower framework. I had to get some more 6 mm (1/4 inch) square timber to complete the job. Hard to believe, but over 11 metres (36 feet) of timber went into making the towers.

Fear of judgement points to the fear of being found out what you fear to know, or accept, about yourself. So the idea is to be become fully acquainted with, and accepting of, yourself. So that you no longer have any secrets, denials, or fears of exposure. Here are a few suggestions to achieving this: Get an school exercise book for writing in. Make a list of what you like about yourself. Write at least 10. This list will be your safety net. It needs to be completed before any other step. Then make a list of what you don't like about yourself. To search further and deeper for those we have hidden in denial and secret closets, write a short note history. Use one page for every year of your life. Spend no more or less than one day per year. That is, if you are twenty years old, be prepared to spend 20 days on this project. Write down every significant fear you have in your life (resentments, regrets, hates, angers, and any other fear related experience of significance). Only write a short note on each one (no longer than a page line). It only needs to jolt your memory. No stories needed. If you can't recall a particular age, think of where you were, school grade, job, friends, seasons, holidays. Take a pad and pen with you wherever you go, because things will just pop in your head while doing something else. Be prepared to feel negative, embarrassed, guilty, sad, angry, and all other expressions of fear. This is okay, this is good, because your secrets and denials are surfacing. You are the judgement of yourself now, so be merciful to yourself. After you finished your list, then be prepared to tell somebody else about it. Pick somebody you can trust or somebody that is prepared to hear your list...like a priest (even if you are not religious, it is at least somebody who will listen, and no longer have to see again). This step is vital. It gets rid of all your secrets. It is a very liberating feeling to have no secrets. Then burn that exercise book, because you no longer need it, for you already know what was in it. Also, it's content, read by a significant other who has never done such an exercise, could pass a judgement on their self, or you, and no longer wish to be significant to you. Divorces have happened with such lists. So get rid of the list after you finish with it. Remember, this list and exercise is ONLY between you, one other person, and God/Truth. This exercise comes from Step 4 and 5 of the Twelve Step Program. It is very powerful healer of held in fears. Step 10 maintains the clean house. I have done a few Steps 4 and 5, each one discovered more and more subtle fears within me. Step 10 is a daily Step 4 and 5. If you do this exercise thoroughly, then there will be no fear of judgement, because you know what is true about yourself. If someone makes a negative judgement about you, you can assess what is true. If it is true, you will either say, "yes I know", or "thank you for telling me something I have not yet seen". If it is not true, then you know it is most likely a misunderstanding, or a reflection of the person making the judgement. In either case, you are not afraid of being judged.

@Deepak sadhwani Fear of separation usually points to fear of being alone. If this is the case, then the relationship has a bases on not feeling alone. It is not unconditional. I am in the same boat. We are all free to do what we want, and take responsibility for it. Knowing this, I often ask myself if I can accept my best friend not wanting to see me again. When I hesitate I know I have invested into that person for personal gain (validation). I then see what I fear and let it go. Then I feel okay with that separation. After all, I have no right to claim that person for myself.

Fear of failure and fear of success go hand in hand. Fear of failure stops a person from attempting anything for fear of being judged as not being successful. Fear of success stops a person from attempting anything for fear of added responsibility (with being successful) which adds fuel to the fear of failure. It can be a vicious cycle that can stop you from changing for the better. Facing fears, like you did when you was about to do your last act proved that things can change. Use that experience as a reference of 'hope' that will help you to face other fears. Life is full of acceptances, accept your fear, accept failures, accept successes, accept responsibilities, accept change in LP, accept everything and all will work out better than you could have expected, because you didn't expect anything.

@OnceMore From your post it is obvious you are feeling a lot of shame. Lets look at that word. Guilt is "I made a mistake and I won't do that again." Shame is "I am a mistake so I can't change." Shame comes from fear of changing a mistake and therefore repeating the mistake until one believes they are a mistake. First of all nobody is a mistake. The reason for not changing a mistake is the fear of changing. So whenever you feel shame you are actually feeling the byproduct of fearing to change. You may find, like myself, many forms of fear towards changing. Perhaps the fear of success and added responsibilities, fear of failure and responsibilities, fear of judgement, fear of the unknown, etc. Any of these fears can stagnate a person. To overcome them one has to acknowledge their fear, and instead of running away you need to face it head on (a new change). Most of the time, when you face it, fear runs away. Life is like a series of experiments, some of them will blow-up in your face, when most will work out okay. So it's okay if an experiment 'fails' to meet your expectations - just don't do that particular experiment again, but do something differently. So ask yourself, and make a list, what you fear about change. Then act in faith that you can change it. Change it, and change yourself.

The bridge tower framework. Doweling the joints with bamboo skewers.

Nothing. If Pinocchio said "my nose is growing" then that would be a paradox, because if it did grow then it would stop because it was true, but if it didn't grow then it would grow because it was a lie, and so on. But by saying it will grow points to a future reference. So it does not have to grow at the moment to make the statement a paradox. IMHO.

@Afonso All is a fabrication of your own mind. That is what we are - thought machines. Now you thought something else, perhaps a glitch in your own matrix.

Full awareness engages everything (sensed) at once. There is no need to focus on a particular. To focus at will on one thing is to disengage from full awareness.

"Land Escape Dreaming" (1991) oil paint. At the time I was living in a Sydney bachelor flat with iron bars on the windows. I was poor and could not afford to travel out of the city to do a landscape painting. So I made one up which included my predicament.

Completed and painted the bridge span framework and operations hut. Computer screen shows what the real hut looks like. Both road and footpath railings are installed. I used matchsticks and split bamboo skewers. Found some narrow washers, in my toolbox, which fitted nicely over the LED navigational lights. Now they look like light beacons. I am very happy with the outcome. It is times like this when I question myself, "Did I build that"?

@Torkys Everything that comes to mind.

Had lots of fun adding the railings and mesh (fly screen). Started painting bridge span.

Try looking at work, and everything else, as an exchange of energy. Our body needs energy (food and medicine). To get those energy resources requires money (another form of energy). To get money is to work (another form of energy) for it. We get that energy from the employer (another form of energy), who pays us to do what the employer wants us to do, regardless how silly / mundane it may be. Also, it is better to be a writer because you love writing. Why not write for free, in your spare time (since you are not working), writing newsletters for members of non-profit organizations (or other). Though it does not pay, it gets you writing (what you love doing) and adds an element to your resume. That is, that you love writing, and have current publications for potential employers to peruse.

Hello beatlemantis. First of all, congratulations for finishing school. Just to let you know, many youngsters leaving school have felt the same way and even worse. So you are not alone with this experience. Life has turned a new chapter. Everything has changed. Routine of going to school, study, meeting regular friends (and even enemies) has ceased. To get along now requires money to travel and meet others at places that cost to buy drinks and food. Your friends are about to meet new friends (you may lose friends). They are starting a new life with new goals and interests. Learning to be independent is a must and somewhat uncertain. A new set of coping skills will need to be learnt. Coping skills checklist (off the cuff): Coping with.... Rejection (from job interviews, partners, peer groups, parents parenting) Financial responsibilities of earning money, budgeting, savings, paying bills, food and cooking, medical, insurance. Socializing into new groups. Meeting new people. Dealing with different personalities. Living alone. A job that bores you, or challenges you. A new set of unfounded fears about self and future. This forum is a good place to ask questions about how to cope with your new chapter in life.