hinawashi

I don't know why this keeps happening but I sometimes have to deal with this unexplained envy for lesser conscious people. I think they live quite an easy life without having to deal with self-actualization ever in their lifetimes. Sometimes it gets really bad that I start regretting my whole self-actualization experience. I know it doesn't make any rational sense to me right now, but I can't really put my finger on the reason why. My guess is that perhaps it's a lot of work? For example, mindfulness is one big area that I had to work on, and it's not like a one-time deal where I learn something and I'm good but rather it's being constantly awake and that takes immense effort.

@K VIL The video on exploiting people? It's really short but the key point is when you see people in a low conscious state, observe their behavior and examine yourself to see if you're committing the same mistakes. Though it's highly unlikely for you to repeat their same exact mistakes, you can still use it to examine other areas of your life. In a nutshell, it's all about using peoples to reflect upon yourself instead of pointing fingers at them. @Geromekevin Leo has another video about happiness as well. He compares hedonic happiness VS eudemonic happiness. Hedonic happiness is easy to get but it never fulfills you and you're basically craving for more stimulation, whereas eudemonic happiness it's a more permanent fix, though you are required to keep the habit of mindfulness. You might think eudemonic is somewhat "higher" than hedonic, but in reality it's just two ways of playing the game of life.

Actually there's another great video Leo posted. It's called "How to exploit people to grow youreslf". I watched it some time ago, but now I can't seem to dig it out on his channel. Anyways, the main problem with me was not looking under the hood. Turns out my envy was coming from inside and it's got nothing to do with other people, and the quick litmus test is basically admitting that this whole envy isn't going to make my life any better, and using Leo's resourceful mindset I can sort of look at people from a different perspective by actually using them as resource for introspection.

I never expected @Leo Gura to answer my question directly. Many thanks! It really answered my question that was burning inside me. The thing is, I never looked at it from that perspective, like actually jumping out of myself and putting myself in other people's shoes. It's surprisingly true that a lot of low-consciousness people engage in this suffering-stimulation cycle, but I've never been observant enough to see that pattern. It's so scary! I actually did feel like I woke up from hell ever since I started my self-actualization journey. I don't necessarily feel that I'm better than anyone though, but I genuinely feel sorry for those low-consciousness people deep down inside. To be in pain and being blinded by all the illusions is a horrible fate to suffer, really.

If you think about it, we really do live on the planet of apes, and we are the apes.

So I was meditating a few days ago, trying to follow Leo's advices and whatnot, trying to connect myself with the rest of the universe so to speak. Then I suddenly realized that there really is no "me" in this world, and everything is one, I am the entire universe, and everything in the universe is me. But then came the scary part. At the same time I made that realization, I felt extremely frightened, as if I'm about to die, like I know my death is coming. Almost like I'm falling off a cliff and I know I'm doomed to die when I hit the bottom. I started to panic and I had to snap myself out of meditation to get that frightening feeling out of my mind. I certainly don't want to go through that process again. That's too much for me to handle. SO I'm asking you guys here, is that feeling common when meditating? Or is it just me going nucking futs?

The Bible also mentions that the tongue (not breath) of humans can be pure evil that it gets its fire from Hell itself. Forgot where that's from but it's somewhere in the new testament. It is also one of the most deceptive, pouring out blessings on one hand and then immediately switch to cursing the same people God has created. That makes perfect sense, because Leo did say in his latest video that evil is self-deception. Guess it's better to be a dragon than a human then, at least that's what our reptilian brain thinks.

Not sure if I'm commenting on the title of the thread or the content, but here am I giving unwarranted advice again. Work ethics is great, but there is always the trap of being addicted to the progress. Here's a quick litmus test. Ask yourself, if you have nothing to do, perhaps on one of your off days, do you feel that you need to work harder in order to feel good, or be validated, or whatever. Do you ever have the fear of being viewed as lazy, lacking proper work ethics, or just insecure in general? Are there strings attached to your work ethics? Do you feel empty inside without anything to work on? As for setting up good ethics, like @SFRL said, start with small chunks first, then look for a pattern in the small chunks. Use that pattern on bigger chunks and you'll find a bigger pattern and so on. When you're starting, it's actually beneficial to ignore the big picture for the time being because the big picture can be so overwhelming that it could instantly crush your motivations.

I would like to thank Leo as well, but I don't see him as a father figure in our lives. Yes, I do appreciate Leo pouring out his entire lives to create all these wonderful videos and other material, but deep down inside, we made the choice of listening to him and that's ultimately what changed out lives. That's why I'd be cautious of saying that Leo "adopted" us. Guided us, yes, but adopted, no.

I can still re-integrate myself back in society. There's nothing wrong with it. The reason you feel like you're forced back is because you still have this lingering "hate" for the average peoples. I know that I've had this feeling before when I went on a 10-day meditation retreat to Nara, and when I came back to Tokyo I just hated the so-called "low consciousness" peoples around me. But then I realized that this hate is actually my ego still trying to hold itself at a moral high ground, so to speak. But think of it this way, how can you be "better" then them if everyone and everything is one? Once you get that feeling that everyone in the world is actually one... thing, then really that hate for the normal peoples evaporates away into thin air, and that's when you can re-integrate yourself back to the mortal world without feeling being forced to do it.

This actually has nothing to do with Leo personally. It could be anyone. Anyone can hate anything for any reason, or for no reason at all. If there's something that threatens someone's ego, they will react negatively to it. Another reason is that the ego never looks inwards. That's exactly the reason your family members fight each other and they're completely blind to that, yet they look outward and sees Leo, or maybe even you, as the source of this so-called "falsehood" that's ruining their lives. That's why they see Leo as "intoxicating" and you as simply "bad". Also, keep in mind that the reason ego never looks inwards is because looking inwards will kill it, or at least render it powerless in controlling your lives. That's the Achilles Heel of the ego, like the self-destruct button on the back of a robot. You press it and it goes boom. That's why the ego will sacrifice everything to protect that fatal weak point.

@TimStr I honestly don't know which technique I was using. I was simply clearing out of my own thoughts and start to see the world as myself, like I am the whole universe and everything in it is part of me, sort of. I really don't know how to describe it in words, but I was listing everything I could think of, and taking it in as part of me, both the good and the bad things. But in the end, it became so frightening that I had to stop and I really don't want to go back in there. I think I'll go read some threads from the meditation section of the forum. Maybe I'm doing it the wrong way and turned meditation into a complete nightmare.

Leo talked about this in his "what's wrong with ego" episode. What he's doing is that he wants to trick your ego into thinking "what's in it for me" because the ego only listens to its own language which is all about "me me me and me". You gotta give some benefits to enlightenment to the ego to make it listen and follow you, then the enlightenment kills it. Think of it like trapping some animal like a mouse. You can't expect the mouse to run up to the trap and kill itself on its own. You have to put a bit of peanut butter (not cheese, contrary to popular belief FYI) to lure the mouse into the trap, then the trap snaps shut on the mouse and it's dead. I mean when you look at the ego this way, it's basically like an animal, and Leo did say it's your "monkey mind", so there you go. Sorry for being completely off-topic though.

I think Leo mentioned about this topic in one of his videos. While he didn't mention being bored, he did say that people look for distractions because that's how they cope with the emptiness inside them. In my opinion, boredom seems to be closely linked to this inner emptiness. I could be wrong though. As some of you mentioned that when you become enlightened, the things that used to keep you from boring become boring themselves! So I have a feeling that whether you're empty or fulfilled inside actually dictates what you believe to be boring or not. It's probably all a matter of perspectives.

Yes, you've read my mind perfectly correct. This is exactly what I'm thinking. I used to say I'm not afraid to die, but when that ego death comes upon me, that really reduces me to a pile of quivering jelly. In my rational mind I know this is only a meditation and I'm not really going to die, but that fear of death completely overwhelms the rational side of my mind to the point that fear of death becomes real. Thanks for letting me know anyways. I wish I could overcome this fear and keep making progress, but right now I'm far from ready yet...

@Sukhpaal To be honest I was probably more neurotic than an average person, but I had an extremely strong urge to get rid of my neurotic personalities and break free, which led me to start this self-actualization journey and keep going at a faster and faster pace. What I would be like in 6 years? I don't know. That would be like going into some really deep uncharted territory for me.

Question: When does the inner transformation take place when you're self-actualizing? I'm asking this because I suddenly felt something strange happening to me. I'm feeling much more comfortable with enlightenment than ever before. For example, I no longer care about other people's opinions of me, I'm no longer vindictive and I don't feel the need to get even with anyone. I'm also exploiting other "unenlightened" people to constantly remind myself of not falling into the same traps as them, and really turns those I used to hate into a learning experience. There's still many more challenges down the road, like conquering my fear of the unknown and uncertain, but I know I'll eventually conquer my fears. I've been wondering, why does this transformation feel very sudden? Is it because I haven't been paying attention to myself? If I'm not paying attention to my own growth then how can I grow in the first place? Sorry if I'm asking too many questions here. I just needed to get my thoughts straight.

@Sukhpaal It took me 6 months to feel this sudden transformation, so maybe I'm lucky compared to you? I don't know. I think it's more or less a phase that we would have to go through sooner or later. I do agree with you that this isn't the end of the road yet, and I still have plenty of other areas to work on, but at least I went through the very first bottleneck.

Exactly what @Shiva said. The more I read I more I feel so stupid myself, and while I'm less inclined to talk about what I have learned, I do talk more about how many mistakes I've made in the past and how much of a fool I am. Perhaps that's the very reason I'm becoming less and less talkative nowadays.

Quick question here: Why are fans so fanatical? For example, there are plenty of My Little Brumby (Friendship is Witchery) fans out there, but apparently if you mention that you don't like those brumbies in front of them, they will treat it as an ad hominem attack for some reason. Although this seems quite pervasive on the Internets, but it's common outside of the online world (politics, for example). My knowledge fails to explain this problem, so I'm asking for some insight from the peoples here. Hope you know more about this than I do.

OK, but do we have to identify with something? It is possible for us to not be associated with anything at all? If so is that part of what enlightenment is about? This is quite difficult for me to understand because how can people identify with something that's not themselves? I mean I'm not a brumby, so how can I identify myself as a brumby? How can I be attached to something external that I believe that it becomes me? It's just mind-baffling to think about.

I tend to use the resourceful mindset rather than the scarcity mindset. Leo talked about this and what it boils down to is that everything in life is a resource. Even the bad things. It just depends on whether you can use them. Even when you're lacking something, I shit you not, you can still use that lack as a resource. It's hard to explain but let me give an quick example. Suppose you have no friends (like me) and you think this loneliness is a lack of friendship. But when you actually build your life upon solitude you'll realize that a good portion of time spent with your friends would actually go to total waste.

I'm an artist too. I do both digital and traditional art, on both my computer and on paper. Personally I believe the purpose of my art is to express myself, and show people the kind of stuffs I like. Whether people like it or give my any feedback really isn't anything I can control, so I tend not to think too much about it. As long I think I've put all my efforts on it, I'd give a "good job" to myself. In a broader sense, you can be an artist without doing any "artsy" stuffs, like shooting videos, because your life is a piece of art in itself.

In my honest opinion, I don't think it's possible to have unconditional happiness without enlightenment. Maybe there's someone who pulled it off but I haven't come across any. As for practical ways, I do it this way: Find ways to appreciate everything in life, even if at first glance it's not "favorable", and always find ways to learn from it.

@LorcanThe difference between you and the other young men and women is that you want to get out of it. Yes! It's that simple. You wanted to get out of the shallow-minded paradigm, but they didn't. People don't self-actualize because they don't want to. People are not happy because they don't want to be. People are shallow because they fear the deep end. If I'm not mistaken, Leo's videos have hundreds of thousands of views. But whether people want to change doesn't depend on Leo, it depends on them. If it's Leo's videos that made you change, good for you (not Leo, even though I give him credit for his efforts at shooting all these videos). Whether you want to change depends on you and you alone, because it could've been someone else who wiped off the dirt from your lens, and you'd still change without seeing any of Leo's videos. The most important thing is that desire to self-actualize. Remember this, as long as you have that desire inside you, you will keep going higher and higher.