I have been with my husband for 3 years and I have loved him deeply through everything we have been through. We are now at a point in our lives that we believe the right thing to do is go our separate ways but I'm finding myself second-guessing. I know either way I would be ok. The thought of living a future different than I imagined is scary but it would be fine. If I stay, it would be extremely challenging and I don't know if we would ever be right for each other but I know I would be ok. So my question is, what is the best way to make a decision and be happy with it?
Maybe it would help if I gave some specifics... Matt doesn’t know who he is or what he wants in life. He doesn’t know if he loves me or if he ever has. He feels resentment and hate towards me but cant seem to pinpoint why. He has a very scrambled thought process and isn't capable of introspective thinking so the harder he tries to think the more confused he becomes. I get frustrated when we talk because I have a more linear thought process and by the end of a conversation I always feel confused and overwhelmed. He is also disgusted by the effect 3 pregnancies has had on my body and wants to emotionally punish me for not having a porn star body. He has said a lot of hurtful things but I know I could forgive him if I work on my self esteem, I'm just thinking it might be easier to work on it without him around because he always casually reminds me about the flaws with my body. There is more but these are just some basic aspects of our relationship that have led us to the conclusion that divorce is probably for the best. I feel like we shouldn't be together, I just have so many doubts and "what-if's" and I want to know how to be happy with my decision
edit: I left out a huge key aspect....he is a pathological liar and never worked on bettering himself. every time I would catch him in a lie he would just try to spin a story he thought I would accept
