Ananta

The only thing that kept me tied to her regardless of the abuse and dysfunction is that deep down I knew she loved me. Even though she abused me. Very messed up, but my sister says the same. I think that she wanted to do good, but couldn't due to her alcoholism and mental illness.

@DreamScape There's the after effects, then the unexpected hit during the after effects. Just one big mind fuck after another, hence me pulling the plug many times, for years, to get a break.

Thank you. If you need an ear you can PM me. I understand.

@Roy It's not all men, not at all, I have no problems with normal men, but are women not supposed to speak out against red pill mentality men? We are just supposed to be quiet, because it's where these men are right now? ...I..don't...think...so! Many men saying they are into pick-up are really red piller's. Pay attention to how they talk about their relationship with women. It's cold and emotionless, distant to the fact that the women they are trying to get in the sack are human beings. They are ready and willing to stereotype and objectify women constantly. I wrote this to someone and it applies here- "Red pill is strongly prejudiced against women. One day, this will probably lead men that were once kind, to actually start being violent with women, maybe even raping them. There are undertones of anger and hate going on in red pill communities. It's pretty scary." So, I will speak out about it and about being stereotyped and objectified as a women, by some of these men. Our gender is inferior physically and it may get to the point where I'm afraid to walk down the road, because some man might decide to exert his manhood on me. Of course, as men, you aren't concerned, well as a woman I am. Especially after hearing some men on here and their mentality. The red-pillers of today, are the rapist's of tomorrow. Especially, when their pick up games no longer work.

@DreamScape It's so hard! My mother was a neglectful, emotional, verbal abuser my whole life. Thankfully, my step mother raised me since I was 5 when I was taken away from my mother, but mommy dearest had visitation every weekend. She was not only an alcoholic, but mentally ill and refused to take her medication, ever, so me and my sister suffered for it. I stopped communication with her several times, for years at a time, but she would somehow find a way back in my life. She died about two years ago. I have peace now.

Lol?

There have been complaints that there are too many PUA threads. Please post in one that's already open. This is essentially a duplicate thread in subject matter.

The alternative is approaching and when there's interest, actually try to get to know the human being you just approached. Instead of just trying to get them in the sack asap or your out, as you say. Which is really shallow. Also, the alternative is understanding that not all females fit into this stereotype you put women in. How about approaching some quality women once in a while ? Or is hanging out in bars more your scene? Basically, you were hurt in earlier years from being rejected and now that you learned game and are having some success you are just an angry man, revengeful, that wants nothing more then to use women at every turn and spit them out, feeling very satisfied at being able to do so. If I'm wrong, I apologize, but I don't think I am.

@Hardkill ❤

You can't think of anything a ltr provides, except sex? Your kidding, right? I think you're addicted to pick up. From the way you talk it seems like you get a dopamine rush from "seeking, finding, scoring, dumping" and it doesn't mean much else to you. The women don't mean anything to you. So, in that sense, of course you can't see, nor understand, nor appreciate the benefits of an actual caring/loving relationship. Maybe one day you will grow out of this, because at the end of the day it's not truly fulfilling, no matter how much you say it is. Just like an addiction isn't really fulfilling. It's an itch you can never quite scratch. All the sex in the world isn't worth it, if you live a life of never being truly loved.

I hate cardio! ??? I will start floor exercise/squat type stuff and with that little speech of yours, guess I'll start it sooner than later, hehe. Thanks for the kick in the ass! ❤

I just wrote a post and lost it, argggg! That's great! Wish I liked exercise, lol. When I lose a bit more I'm going to start. Eating before seeing your friends is a really good idea! This way if there are unhealthy foods there you won't be able to eat much of it, lol. Yes, quiting smoking/vaping cold turkey and never, ever having one puff again since is what has made me be able to quit. I was a smoker/vaper for many, many years and I loved it or thought I did, so it was painful to quit. To this day, I occasionally wish I could smoke or vape. Thank you! The thread has had some great feedback from ppl ! Yes, one reason I'm really liking this intermittent fasting is that between lunch and dinner I don't typically eat, then after dinner I'm done eating. So, I don't have time for emotional eating anymore, which use to be in the evenings before bed. If I do that I break my fast and I don't want to do that. ❤

I'm sure it's fine, but I'd be willing to look it over for you if you want. Well, that's good. ? How many interviews have you had? And how long have you been looking? Well, PT now requires a doctorate degree and the bachelor's leading up to it has to be in health sciences. Have you thought of a PTA program? Home care is good for nurses, PT, OT and their assistants for those that prefer or do best with one on one contact vs too much multi-tasking. However, you still have to get through the schooling. I was 34 when I started college and 37 when I graduated and got my nursing license. So, I know all about college at an older age. I had been an EMT and a cosmetologist earlier in my life. Nice! You don't hear that every day. Maybe make some voice tapes and send them to an talent agent. See, you have many talents! Yes. Also, I think someone mentioned it? But, teaching students with learning disabilities ? Do you live alone? Do you support yourself with student loans currently? Hang in there. Sometimes we go through really tough challenges in life, just to come out somewhere in the end that we couldn't have even imagined. A year ago, I quit my job as a home care coordinator and didn't have a job to replace it and then couldn't find another job doing what I wanted. After 4 months and going through thousands of dollars of my savings I took a home care nursing job where i was back in the field, just so i would have a job. Little did I know at the time that that job would lead me to getting a promotion within 6 months to clinical manager of the home care agency, which is my current job. ❤

Yikes! The guy is trying his hardest and you sorta just kicked him while he's down.? You mean like trying to be a teacher? Unfortunately, it's just not been working out, no wonder he is depressed.

That doesn't sound true, at all. On that note, time to lock it up.

This is close enough-

Not really, red pill is toxic ideology. You are free to go to "Red Pill Reddit " and discuss it ad-nauseum. From urban dictionary (first paragraph of definition)- Red pill "A small fundamentalist internet subculture of angry, thirsty, mostly white, conservative males who blame all their romantic and social failures on women."

I see, it seems you are trying very hard to compensate as best you can with the issues. Do you still need help with the resume? What type of jobs have you been applying for lately? Do you look the interviewer in the eye and shake hands, speak fluently when asked questions? Any problems with that kinda stuff? So, a few thoughts, if you don't want to try again with the teaching, which I don't know if you do or don't, but if not, what else could you do with the bachelor's degree you already have? Could you change majors with the masters program? Have you looked to see if you'd be interested in anything else? If you want to continue, then maybe you'd do better next time? Not sure, but like someone else said maybe a job doing teaching, one on one (tutoring) or not in person (on-line). You may have to get creative. Like I said earlier, I also had to get creative, because I couldn't tolerate floor nursing. I had to almost beg for my first home health agency to hire me, because you usually need to be a nurse a minimum of one year in medical/surgical and I had only 4 months. After my interview, I called every week for 3 weeks, until they said okay. After about a year in home health I had to start case managing and doing visits and I had a very hard time. I had a nervous breakdown basically and did something really stupid. I don't want to see you do something stupid, because of a job/career. I know you've put a lot of time into this and have money invested in this specific career, but you may have to find something else. Change gears altogether... Personally, I wish I would've been an accountant!

Thanks? Oh, I didn't know that! Wow, you've lost a lot of weight! Good for you. Did you exercise to or mainly diet? Sorry if you said that already. If ppl have ever tried to lose more then 5-10 lbs, then I'm sure they realise it's hard, its damn hard! It's hard to get started with something that will actually be effective, then stay with it. Yes! It's a mind set and ppl still addicted to the goodies don't like to see ppl that aren't also indulging. Same with smokers, last thing you want as a smoker is for your smoking buddy to quit the cigs. Btw, I quit cigs/vaping 3 1/2 years ago. It was a life long battle.

@Spiral I changed my pic. I think I look older in this one.

49 and proud of it. I take some decent pics, especially in the morning after some beauty sleep.?

Well, personally, I've been in the same relationship for 32 years.

@Roy Nice post! One more thing about my bus comment. Not that she really got hit by a bus (still never know tho), but about 20 years ago my mom was on her way to work and was crossing the street and "literally" got hit by a bus! She was laid up in ICU with a brain bleed and until someone cared enough to call her work they were probably thinking bad things about her not only not showing up, but not calling either!

@Arcangelo Cool beans!

@Arcangelo Maybe she got hit by a bus, ya never know.