@The White Belt When it comes to mindfulness, you don't choose.. Initially, it is ok to be mindful of breath and bodily sensations. But this has to be gradually extended to everything that happens in your conscious first-person experience without repressing or judging the thoughts including the thoughts which are judgemental about 'being judgemental of your thoughts'... And this has to be extended to every moment gradually, by being a complete, passive, non-judgemental witness of everything that happens when you are walking, eating, bathing etc.
Let us say this is your mind as you notice and the following thoughts are the thoughts which are arising:
Ok, I am going to be mindful of my thoughts - you notice this thought without analyzing, judging, identifying with it and let it arise and pass away
oh, am I doing this right? - you notice this thought without analyzing, judging, identifying with it and let it arise and pass away
I have to pee - you notice this thought without analyzing, judging, identifying with it and let it arise and pass away
and I really want to have sex with my new crush - you notice this thought without analyzing, judging, identifying with it and let it arise and pass away
(you feel guilty now and you notice this feeling as well)
(there is a slight pause in the thought flow now and you wait for the next thought to arise in a curious manner)
Probably after enlightenment I won't get such thoughts - you notice this thought without analyzing, judging, identifying with it and let it arise and pass away
(You get lost in the thoughts for 2 minutes, and you suddenly remember that you have to be mindful)
oh shit, I forgot to be mindful for a while - you notice this thought without analyzing, judging, identifying with it and let it arise and pass away
It is hard to be mindful, will I ever succeed? - you notice this thought without analyzing, judging, identifying with it and let it arise and pass away
It is too bad that I forgot to be mindful... I am not doing it correctly -you notice this thought without analyzing, judging, identifying with it and let it arise and pass away
I am judging my ability to be mindful now.. this is a game of ego - you notice this thought without analyzing, judging, identifying with it and let it arise and pass away
my legs are aching.. let me sit down a bit - you notice this thought without analyzing, judging, identifying with it and let it arise and pass away
...............................................................
This is the practice I did for about 12 years and it is extremely powerful.  You can download this infographic to understand some basics of it: 
 

 
 

Finished watching Leo's latest video. For what it's worth, there have been other enlightened people that dedicated their lives to teaching with the same ceaseless determination. Richard Rose comes to mind and by all indications he felt just as strongly about his life purpose as Leo does.
I don't know that I would use the word passion or heart, maybe I just have a very different idea of what those words mean. In the end all I know is that, yes, we're all impelled by impersonal forces and that's why I don't let anyone tell me what my path should be.
I'm sure those forces take different forms in different people, and what I get from the video is that this is how Leo feels about his path. So, hey... regardless of our differences about enlightenment, can't really fault a guy for sticking to his guns. Go for it Leo.
Btw. one thing I do agree with, is that the single biggest obstacle to both growth and truth is the materialist paradigm. There are many things to discover when that's gone, you transition into a new paradigm, but only by transitioning out of the old one. Unless and until you do that, you're pretty much stuck there.
 
(Note that extraordinary experiences are not a requirement for this, although they could undoubtedly help if you know what you're doing.)
 

I would say No.
Reality doesn't do any calculations behind the scenes. There is no behind the scenes. Reality it DIRECTLY being itself. There can be no metaphor for this. Which is why its so hard for people to grasp. The directness of it is incredible and bends the mind.
The whole trick to reality is that it's mystical and amechanical. Which is why science keeps struggling to map it.
What you are experiencing IS the mechanism!

This is how video games work I always wonder if consciousness and reality also works like this.
I'm assuming people will get what is going on with the gif.
https://media.giphy.com/media/l4pT7z45RHMALD1lK/source.gif

Yes, I know that dread quite well. But it's just the ego still clinging. Keep chipping away at it.
Fear of insanity is a real bitch for me. Sometimes I think I conquered it, but then one deep psychedelic trip and Oh boy, not even close. Those insane trips are the most challenging. It feels like a permanent decent into stark raving madness. It's disturbing as hell. Like literally entering a hell-realm.