Zenrik

Done any other psychedelics? You might have a tolerance that will ware off after some trips. I had to smoke weed 5 times before it had any effects on me. Don't know if this is relevant for psychedelics

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True. Edit: I just want to pont out that it is so much pointless mental masturbation. That is not grounded in direct experence. And speculation that death = enlightenment seems like a dangerous hypothesis for some of the emo souls on this forum.

No its not enlightenment.. Who knows what happends after death?

@Anirban657 To improve self love you need to practice self love. Look around for resources for cultivating self love and confidence directly. This video is a start. I would say you need to master self love to become a good DJ, not the other way around. You are worthy btw

@MiracleMan He might say some wack things, but the teaching has infinity value.

@MiracleMan hey! Sorry for my bad spelling. Anyways-->Your emotional bankaccount is all out. You need to practise self love, NOW!. You probably trying to get better by telling yourself you sould, and unfortunately our brain dosent work that way... Hey, if I could do all the things I tell myself I sould do, I would be an enlighten superstar. Meditation doesnt do you any good if you dont embody self compassion and self love. Your relationships will be crap unless you can be compassionate to yourself (If you can be compassionate to yourself its easy to be that way with others). By practicing self love you will get the empowerment you need over time. Dont expect getting better within a week. You cant expect feeling better within a week, but often it comes gradually. Your brain needs time to carv out new pathways. You might backlash, but commit to a lifetime of self compassion. So im going to refer you to a teacher called Matt Kahn, He has some wondedrfull mantras that you can tell yourself all day (its all about reprogramming): Here are some of them and some i got at other places. DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF THESE MANTRAS. and they will not feel authentic in the beginning. Try tell them in a compassionate way if you can. They work fine if you cant Mantras: I love you Its ok to be sad Its ok to be angry Its ok to dont know what to do Iits ok to feel hopeless Its OK not knowing how to love myself (start with this one if you feel like "I love you" is to much). I dont know how to be compassionate to myself May i be happy May i be at peace May i be free May i be safe May all beings be happy May all beings be at peace May all beings be free May all beings be safe And dont be afraid to make your own mantras. You might wanna start your day with this one: "Today im going to be more loving, compassionate and gentle to myself, for the well being of all" Repeat many times I dont have more time to write now, I might check in here later. Peace PS. Also try to find some guided "love and kindness" meditations

I present: Blueberry apple pie heaven - Smoothe Ingredients: 1 big banana 1 apple 1- 2 cups blueberries 1- 2 ts peanut butter some milk to make it liquid (I use 1,2% fat milk) some cinnamon (I use alot) and a tiny bit of salt You can also add some stevia and vanilla if you vant. But Zenrik! what about them greens? I just munch my greens (broccoli or spinach) while i mix the smoothe in the morning.

Enlightenment is just as real as lemons.

@Marks199 You seem like a damn strong guy. Your family is a mess, and you are trying to rais your consciousness with great forces pulling you down. Get at safe distance if possible, and work towards independence. I also recomend writing about you anxiety, get to know the details better, general anxiety is often not so general. Your mother seems alright, no need to abandon her or the rest of your family. Just get at safe distance, and dont expect to be respected. An unsupportive family is tough, and you have the character to speak up. Kudos!

In worst case I use binural beats. Its super easy to become dull and have scatterd attention when listening to music. I would recomend dividing enjoying music and meditation. But hey, im no fun.

@The_spanish_guy Just do what makes you feel good, keep meeting people and work out. Looking in to it just means getting to know your self more intimate. Write about it, talk about it. Also: This is an exercise from CBT, and helped me a lot. I had some of the similar issues in the past. Try this out: Write the things you are planning to do down, with who, and your assumed satisfaction in percentage. Then after the event write down actual satisfaction. Follow this format: Going to eat lunch with friend expectation: 85% Reality:90%?80%? 30%? Going for a walk alone expectation:70% reality: 70% ect going to the gym – E:60% R:60 ect Doing work /w colleague - E: 65% R: ... Hope you get it This may help you manage you expectations and help you se your self worth.

@The_spanish_guy It really sounds like social anxiety... Look in to it brah, you want to show you best side at the gym and make people se you and like you, so you get super self conscious, that makes you produce adrenaline that you dont feel until you are done exercising. I had the exact problem. Sorry for analyzing, i might be terribly wrong. But I encourage you to look in to it.