@The White Belt Well, life goes on. There's not much choice. Either you choose to kill yourself or you choose to keep living. If you choose to keep living, then you might as well enjoy living. In which case, you might as well set some goals for yourself that you feel will please you and help the world. And then you discipline yourself to work on those goals and enjoy the process.
That's life in a nutshell.
Even though I know it's meaningless, I still have certain things I want to get out of life, and certain things I want to create. The creativity is for its own sake. Start doing the things you find most fascinating/beautiful. Or, if you can't do that immediately due to financial limitations, then make a strategic plan to work towards that goal. Ideally, every day should be you doing your art and enjoying the process and enjoying life. You'll need a strategic plan to actualize that. But first you need to find your life purpose (the thing you find most fascinating/beautiful).
Yes, it's challenging. Some days are difficult.

@moon777light You do what feels best for you, if you want to feel full longer add more healthy fats Anette Larkins grows most of the food she eats so her food is far more mineral/vitamin rich than ones you buy from the stores, even organic food, the longer it sits are the store the less goodness/life-force it has left plus most of them aren't educated enough to create optimal mineral/nutrient rich soil structures needed today due to chemical warfare. Biodynamic farmers are more educated but it all depends on how you understand the whole mechanism of life the last 100+ years.
I know this from experience, i used to buy organic oranges then pick the ones from my tree and eat them directly, the energy and aliveness i felt from the ones on my tree compared to the ones i bought from the store felt like i was on a higher level planet eating their fruit.
I believe that is also the reason for Anette's vital health and youthfulness, plus she consumes a lot of raw sprouted foods which are very high in minerals and minerals are key to looking and staying young in my honest opinion.
Most fruitarians today don't look so well besides the ones who exercise daily, spend a lot of time in nature and can manage to consume about 5000+ calories of of quality homegrown or bio-dynamically grown fruit a day to get enough mineral/nutrient density. Fruit has abundance of vitamins, more than other foods but lacks minerals due to chemical warfare like stated above and depleted soil structures.
Fruit today is nowhere near as nutrient rich as it was 50-100 years ago, i also personally experienced this eating 3 apples from my grandfathers tree which is near 100 years old i felt full and full of energy from morning till evening and let alone the unbelievable nourishing taste and texture.
They say 1 apple 100+ years ago is as nutrient rich as 5 - 10 apples today deepening on source/care/education of the soil structure. The chemicals in the food, water, air supply and chemical pesticides and herbicides used in conventional farming has mass spread and lead to most nutrients depleted and adaption in poorer and poorer quality fruit overtime. then they create GMO to replace which is even worse for us to consume.
Its sorta like replacing a natural herb for a pharmaceutical drug, its man-made ignorance, it doesn't work its only temporary and causes more damage in the long run. Nature works but our society is so detached from nature it has lost its way.
Sorry for the long explanation, i get all this higher energy in the morning that needs to be expressed.
 

The day a guru's farts and shit don't stink is the day I will say they are cut from a different cloth.
Sweet ideas/theories and ability to speak well isn't a super power. 
I think people need to contemplate death more, imagine you're about to get shot in the head and what that means to you right in this moment, in my case it means i'm taking all this bullshit and nonsense too seriously and nothing is concrete or "real" in any definition.
This whole human experience is way too bizarre. I don't even know what all this is anymore.
The other day I was so exhausted my consciousness was so weak, reality felt exactly like a dream as I fell into non existent oblivion yet again.

This is a really great solution to this problem.
Also, psychedelics are very effective at disturpting the status quo, which is why they are banned by governments.
Also, ego backlash is not necessarily wrong or a bad thing. It is a sign of growth. Nature evolves through oscillation, like a wriggling snake. Reframe every ego backlash you have as: "Ah, another lesson to make me wiser."
The key to ego backlashes is to be mindful of them as they happen. Don't necessarily try to force-stop them. Use of force is actaully part of the root problem.
Mistakes and failures, when observed with mindfulness, are not mistakes or failures at all! And even failure at mindfulness isn't necessarily a mistake.

absolutely agree. But...do you drink it? In many US states it has been banned due to severe contamination. Same for many European countries I believe ( but not sure if that's still the case). 
So most of us would remain dependant on packaged pasteurised junk filled with IGF1 and riddled with leukocytes from the poor cow suffering from mastitis. 
that's because vitamins A,D,E,K are not hydrophobic by lipophilic meaning your liver needs fat to be able to metabolise them and that's why you can actually overdose and turn orange from excess Beta-carotene. So if someone eats a carrot on empty stomach in the morning, not a good thing but having it along with avocado, olive oil or few nuts, you'll digest it easily. It also helps to cook it slightly to break down the cellular wall and chew a bit more  

Are you shy around women ?
Because if you are I highly recommand to get a girlfriend and have lots of nasty sex with her.
Don't bullshit yourself on this it's too important to put it aside.

That's key the lesson of epistemology: you do not know who to trust. And you don't even know if you can trust yourself. Hence you must investigate all these matters for yourself from scratch with a totally open mind and see what your investigation will reveal. If you assume ahead of time that you know what will be revealed, that is a mistake. That's closedmindedness.
So, for example, if you've never tried a psychedelic and you think you know what it is or isn't, you've made an epistemic blunder. Because nothing can be know a priori without 1st hand investigation and empirical validation. This sort of mistake is extremely common even among the most intelligent of people.
You cannot even know that 1+1=2 until you sit down and actually do the math and see what's what for yourself.
Hence Actualized.org teachings are not to be believed, but investigated and validated or falsified by YOU, personally, intimately, using utmost care.

@StephenK Mouse and I don't really disagree on much. It's mostly just a difference in emphasis and style. He wants you to take a very narrow approach, pure neti neti -- because that's the approach that apparently worked well for him. There is value in that if your only concern is the direct pursuit of the Absolute and nothing else matters to you and you are 100% motivated to get to the Absolute.
For a few people that will work. But for most people it will not simply because they have a lot of psychological obstacles to deal with first and they won't resonate with neti neti. Each path has its pros and cons.
And then there are issues outside of the domain of strict nonduality, like epistemology or philosophy of science or mastering your emotions or how to be a good human being or what you should do with your life... none of which will be adequately addressed by neti neti or any other one method or teaching.
The fuel of all these spiritual debates is that one person tries to push his spiritual path onto everyone else because he feels his path is the best, assuming it will work for everyone else. This assumption is totally false. But that doesn't stop the person from trying because he's a firm believer in his one path. Because most people haven't seriously walked multiple paths and they have been radicalize by one teacher or another and turned into zealots.
There's nothing new about this. It's been happening since the dawn of time. Everyone believes their path is the best and should be adopted by everyone else.
You have to appreciate that reaching enlightenment is a totally separate matter from effectively teaching and spreading enlightenment. The greatest spiritual achievers are not necessarily the greatest spreaders and teachers. The teacher has to meet the student where the student is at. And many enlightened people don't know how to do that. In the same way that the best physicists are rarely the best physics teachers.
To whittle all of life down to neti neti is extremely short-sighted in my opinion. And as a teacher, it doesn't make sense to me. As a teacher, I have to be open to a variety of tools and methods. There are SO many amazing tools for raising consciousness and personal development that I would never want to abandon them all for neti neti.
Some spiritual paths are very narrow, emphasizing only the Absolute.
Other spiritual paths are very broad, emphasizing diet, right conduct, compassion, psychological development, paranormal abilities, right relationships, etc.
Neither one is best. There are tradeoffs to each and you have to choose for yourself which is right for you at which time in your life.
Personally, I employ both types of teachings, narrow and broad. I find both incredibly worthwhile.

"You want to be fully sober.  Lucid.  Its like, the world is made out of glass.   Not a single thought, not a single theory... just... total quiet"
- by Leo from 10 things you want that you dont know that you want
 
By far the most powerful experience Ive had in my whole life.  It rivals the 5 meo experiences but also I feel like they make a great combination.  One is a powerful blast of consciousness, the other is a a slow revving up that just rewires your mind.
The first few days were pretty bad, the last few days were heaven.
I got a taste of such silence, I saw it as my identity as all around that nothing/silence changed around me.
When I got out I had samadhi experiences with the people i had conversations with.  It felt like I was them.
Insights:
Getting rid of my phone and facebook account.  I dont need them, I can use email and skype.  Too distracting.
Need to meditate more, 2 hours a day minimum, 3 hours on weekends.
We are 100% responsible for our own suffering by our aversion and craving.  It was really clear.
Dont push yourself so hard that you generate negativity.  That happened to me in a couple of strong determination sits.  Need to always remember I am doing this out of love and compassion for myself and others
Slow down.  Try to do every single thing every day as mindfully as you can.
People do what they do out of ignorance.  If they try and hurt you its because they dont know better.  Sometimes you have to be firm in your communications but do it out of love and compassion for yourself and the other person.  The aggressor always suffers more than the victim believe it or not.
Cut down on the theory, amp up the practices.
 
And lastly... the point of this whole post...
Do one of these!!! Really!  If I just convince one person to do it than this post will be worth it.
Sorry to be dramatic and cliche but the experience was just too strong.
 
 

In your heart you know there is light at the end of the tunnel, even if your mind is thinking gloomily. 
Keep that faith in your heart alive. Sometimes the mind has to dance out its dance, and there is nothing you can do about it no matter how hard you try(and no matter how unpleasant it can be). Yes, even so unpleasant it can drive people to do horrible things, whether to themselves or others. But don't give into that.
The heart prevails in the end my friend. The mind is a sprinter, it's always looking for the quick fix, the quick answer in some easily defined concept. But the heart is the marathon runner which will beat out the mind eventually.

@Buba This state is the outcome of negative self inner talk. Likely due to past trauma inducing a strong sense of no control, and thus affirming a mental barrier, a wall of protection, to going within and discovering the self. 
In addition to at least 20 minutes breathe focus meditation every MORNING, practice 24/7 stomach breathing, practice your unconditional love 24/7 - as viscerally as possible - feel it - as much as possible, don’t effort, just get out of the way for it.
Shine the light of awareness on your triggers, the light desolves them. 
Much love, and good luck. Right now, you can’t even imagine how precious your life is becoming. Hang in there. It’s unbelievably, unfathomably, worth it to stay strong and do the practices. Mindfulness desolves all triggers, then all questions. 

Even Actualized can be too much, i am starting to notice myself. The only thing i have noticed you cannot get too much of or that we actually need much more of in today's world is nature and the natural flow of life(so to speak). The more time you spend in nature, the more yourself and the more whole and connected to source you become.
Even Helping others is very addictive, you tend to forget about yourself. When you forget about yourself your advice will not be as pure anymore. I use the internet a lot lately because i am at home although when i start traveling again i feel it will have a greater effect on spreading Light and more harmony can be achieved and shared in more profound ways.
I notice this with cannabis and psychedelics too, the more often i use them the less powerful the insights, where if i take a while off then they hit you like an awakening all over again. As all things in life, Balance is key.
Plant seeds, Move on.
<3

@Thanatos13
 
The ego can't escape it's own desires by telling itself that it's own desires are logical enough to escape it's own desires. that creates the desire in the first place! the mechanism that is creating the desire IS the mechanism that is creating this desire of yours! you can't escape it with your logic.
The question is NOT "Why not end it?"The question is WHY would you want to end it? Because you told yourself that it's logical? Your desire to be logical in order to escape yourself is it's own fallacy. You can't escape your desire to end it just because it's "logical". you're just creating the very thing that you're running away from! Actually, the better question is where did this desire come from in the first place?
just the fact that this idea popped up into your head and the fact that you posted it here on the forum created a desire in you. and what is your desire? Why are you here posting? To end desires! you can't escape them no matter how hard you try. that means if you put a gun to your head and pull the trigger and blow your brains out, before that happened you were just feeding the desire you were trying to destroy. Congratulations you killed yourself, before you died you thought you won, but you actually lost. 

Understand this. This is how the universe works and its laws.
See most people think because they met this girl fell in love and in this "romantic relationship" that the girl is the actual reason for your new state of being that is full of life, happiness and freedom. The person may be the trigger but it is not the entire reason you have so much love and happiness now.
The reason people gain this new state is because they are so giving and loving towards the other, you are finally being how the monks and yogis and spiritual masters taught you to be to everyone and every living thing but you are merely being that way towards 1 single person and by genuine loving, caring, being kind, compassionate and being grateful towards this person, due to these states of being you are expressing which raises your own vibration and the Universe (By universal law) has no option but to return the favor because what you give out you will receive in return (Law of Vibration).
When you throw a pebble in the water it creates ripples that eventually go out and come back, everything else works the same way.
Now imagine if you can be that way towards everyone and every living thing, now you can start to understand why these monks and spiritual masters are at such bliss and peace all the time no matter what is going on in the world around them they are in complete happiness and joy.
 

You stopped what you were mastering to free up time to work on yourself, but now you are looking for something else to master which is going to take up that time once again? 
I think you seek something more relevant to your growth right? 
All I can say is explore, explore, explore. All those things you thought about as a hobbie, do them. 
For a month at a time.
Keep taking notes and after about 6 months, choose one. 
Let me give you a big insight that will save you a lot of confusion though.
When you find it, you will still doubt it, you'll never find a 100% percent perfect fit. You'll be confused about whether or not it is it. No Angels will come from the heavens and congratulate you for finding it. You will still have resistance, you will be scared by the huge challenge you see ahead of you and you'll still have times when you want to quit.
Yeah it's exciting but nobody tells you that your mind will still be in doubt and try to keep changing it. So look out for that.

WARNING! Radical open-mindedness required (or at least preferable)!
 
Hi everyone. Today my spiritual seeking came to an end. Let's just get this out of the way so you will be more inclined to read the rest of the post.
What I want to do is provide you with a perspective on the path that will hopefully help you better navigate this terrain you might call the path to enlightenment, the Absolute, Truth, the natural state - however you prefer to call it. Like any perspective it should not be taken literally and it has certain limitations and blind spots, but nonetheless it is one that doesn't seem to be talked about here.

There are many words people use for describing enlightenment and one's existential nature. Do they point to the same thing? They may or they may not. It is important to clear up that not all "enlightened" people are equally free of ignorance, or conscious of Truth. Even though they may have different pointers for describing the same thing, some of the pointers may point to a state where subtle ignorance remains. Ignorance is the sense of there being a separate self.
 
 
 
Ignorance may fall away suddenly or gradually, but it doesn't seem to happen just any random way. The falling away of ignorance follows a certain succession of steps. You may skip steps, but you do not go through the steps in any other order. The steps I'm talking about describe one's sense of self and some key characteristics of how life is experienced. All steps except for the last are states of lesser and lesser ignorance - only the last one is free of it.

Interestingly, these steps correlate with the openness of the crown chakra. A person with a fully open crown chakra is free of ignorance. The more closed the crown chakra is, the more person's reality feels contracted. That's what the ego is - a contraction. It's not being selfish or being an asshole. People who are fully uncontracted can still act like jerks - let alone people who still have a degree of contraction. Even worse, these people may care less about their behavioral issues or even deny their existence. Enlightenment doesn't give you a flawless personality.
The openness of the crown chakra is measured on a scale of 1-1,000, with a thousand being fully open. People who have learned to measure this can thus quite accurately pinpoint a person's level of contraction. With contraction comes the sense of there being somebody behind the eyes and between the ears, and then the sense of owning a body. At this time I'm not going to say where the 1-1,000 scale originates from, I might do it some other time. If you're eager to learn more you have to do some digging. Even if you don't believe in or care for chakras, this model is still useful.
 
 
 
 
 
Now I'm going to present you with a map with the steps on the path to enlightenment, paralleled with the 1-1,000 scale, sense of self, and some key characteristics of experience. 
 
1. The Spiritual Person (500-559). This person is interested in spirituality but they're not seeking enlightenment. They're identified with their body-mind and don't know any better.
Examples: Ralph Smart, Teal Swan
2. The Spiritual Seeker (560s-580s). This person is seeking enlightenment or Truth.  They're identified with their body-mind but realize they don't know who they really are, hence they seek to find out.
Examples: probably many of you  
3. Self-Realization or No-Self (600s). This person no longer feels like they're the separate self - the sense of being the controller of actions the body takes goes away - it's like having no breaks. There's a sense of being boundless but that sense is still localized in the body (head) and does not encompass anything else. People in this state may intellectualize they're conscious of the absolute nature of reality but they really aren't. Another and the world still feel very real and there may be a strong urge to save them.
Examples: Eckhart Tolle, Fred Davis, U.G. Krishnamurti, Tony Parsons
4. Cosmic Self (700s). This person feels like they are the whole universe, and that the whole universe is inside them.
Examples: Ken Wilber, Mooji, Byron Katie, Genpo Roshi, Adyashanti (probably)
5. Unity Consciousness (800s). The nature of another is realized to be one's own self. The boundary of inner/outer fades - everything is seen as nothing. Even still, a sense of other and an external world being real remain. People on the devotional/bhakti path can remain here for a long time, usually people go through it rather briskly.
Examples: Shinzen Young (maybe), Saint John of The Cross, David Spero
6. Stabilizing In The Absolute (900s). The sense of other and an external world fades even further but is not completely gone.
Examples: Jan Esmann (until recently)
7. The Absolute or The Stateless State or Sahaja Samadhi (1,000). Everything is seen as the self. There's no other or an external world - making those projections becomes impossible. There is a sense of completion and finality, and you're free of suffering.
Examples: Ramana Maharshi, Nisargadatta Maharaj, Francis Lucille, Rupert Spira, Peter Ralston, Jan Esmann (very recently), Sat Shree, Sadhguru

Some Notes About The Map
I didn't really experience 3, 4, and 6 so I can't relate to those too well. The map is not perfect: some descriptions might be too inaccurate and some people may be a step higher or lower. Certain things I said could use expanding on.

My Personal Journey & Some Words Of Advice

Until today I had been seeking for close to three years. I have tried various techniques. My record of maintaining a steady meditation habit is 40 days in a row (3 hours per day of self-inquiry). After close to 2,5 years of seeking, I found a powerful tool and it took me from spiritual seeking all the way to the absolute (it is not a psychedelic or any other drug). I have chosen not to share it in a public forum post at the given moment. You can probably find it based on stuff I've said if you're an eager researcher. It's literally a cheat code. Then again, personal development wise my life is a mess, so make of that what you will (zen devil grin). 

Drop all concepts and ideas you have of enlightenment, or at least don't take them seriously. They will be inaccurate. In a sense, enlightenment is disappointment until there's nobody left to be disappointed. Enlightenment is not hard (practice can be!), enlightenment is not special, and enlightenment is not dramatic. Don't expect flashy experiences or drastic emotional events accompanying realizations. They can happen but don't have to. For me there was pretty much none of that. 

Most importantly, remember than you're going to need a tool. You're not going to become enlightened by "giving up the search" in the way some people understand it - otherwise most of the world would be enlightened. If that tool is going to be practice, do your practice and do lots of it. Practice also has the benefit of carryover to transforming your personality and habits. Otherwise, use some of the hints in this post to find the tool I used and just do that. It'll get you enlightened probably 100s of times quicker but don't expect it to do anything else such as make you money, get you a hot girlfriend, make you stop procrastinating, make you a good person etc etc. Yes, it will probably help you and certain psychological changes happen instantly, but you might be disappointed. Doing personal development while already at sahaja samadhi is probably more fun though. Your choice  

If you have any questions, feel free to ask.

@Slade There is a snowball effect that will happen.
You start with a little nugget of LP, like telling jokes, and as you work on it over the years, it will deepen, and as you contemplate the essence of what impact you're trying to make, and who you authentically are, everything will deepen in an amazing way.
Don't expect super depth from the get-go. It's like you found a diamond in the rough. Now you gotta polish it to see its full glory, which will take some years to see. Be okay with that.

Personally, I am being pulled toward deeper realizations of the illusionary nature of self and to nonduality. Much of this thread reminds me of The Four Agreements in which an "unhealthy" illusionary self is replaced with a "healthy" illusionary self.
I also sense in the thread an underlying assumption that some actions are "better" than other actions. And most of those "better" actions are within the classic social framework of "success". That is: dedication, give 110% percent, achieve, dream big, reach your potential, do extraordinary things. I've found ambition and perseverance can be a major distraction to inner Truth. I've run over 50 marathons and ultramarathons. I've done IronMan triathlons. I know the dedication of training day in and out - 1-8hrs a day. I've pushed my limits to the point of hallucinations, loss of cognitive function and physical collapse in which I needed hospital care. The experiences shaped me, yet it did NOT reveal my inner truth. I've also pushed my limits mentally. I worked 12hrs a day for periods as I attained a phd in molecular biology. I persevered countless hours in the laboratory to answer a burning scientific question. I've published dozens of papers and have been featured on scientific journal covers. I've given international speeches. NONE of this revealed inner Truth. Most of it was a major distraction where I was chasing something. Based on self. Yet nothing could fill it. It was never enough. Deep down, I was trying to fulfill a self identity imposed upon me by my parents and society: of what is "good", of who I "should" be. Deep down, there was a yearning to be accepted and loved. I was often consumed with thoughts of what to do next, what will happen if XYZ occurs, what do other people think of me, how can I achieve. . . 
For me, deeper levels of awareness have NOT come from living a healthy lifestyle. They have NOT come from dedication and perseverance to achieve extraordinary things. When tied to my self identity, it's all a distraction. The realizations have come through cracks in my ego and self identity. For me, living a "healthy" life and achieving does not crack my ego and self identity. It can actually reinforce it. "I am a marathon runner", "I am a scholar", "I am dedicated", "I am blah blah blah". The cracks leading to glimpses of Truth have come during times I'm forced out of my self identity. For example, I've lived with native tribes in Central and South America. Also, meditation retreats (yet it is slow and subtle). And psychedelics have been a powerful tool. 
In the thread there also seems to be an underlying sense of free will of the little "you". There is no free will for "me". I am not making all these decisions and actions to do healthy activities and live a "meaningful" life. I am not the author of my thoughts and actions. It comes from some mysterious nothing or something that I don't understand. I don't get to receive credit or blame. . . For me, I am being pulled toward "just being" and letting that mysterious whatever flow without resistance. If that means hiking Everest naked, great. If that means dancing in my kitchen naked to disco music, great. The ideas that I "need" or "should" do certain things are limiting concepts.
While living in Peru, I met a man who fortuitously became wealthy. He has spent most of his life traveling around the world. He had no dedication, ambition or agenda. He was open and free. To travel where the energy takes him. To meet people and experience things as they surface into his life in the present moment. He was pensive and introspective. He had a depth of awareness and love. He is one of the most fascinating people I've ever met in my life. His perspective was outside of the limits of my own perspective. It poked cracks into my self identity.
A couple weeks ago, I frolicked with the most beautiful butterflies deep within a Belizean jungle. The present moment. The mysterious energy/consciousness flowing freely from one moment to the next. For me, that "just being" IS "doing something" with my life.

5-MeO will help someone move from the unexperienced questioning of Yellow to the experienced understanding of Turquoise.
Absolute Truth goes beyond all philosophy, all description, and all conversation - and 5-MeO shows you that real quick. 
But the more important thing about 5-MeO was the disappointment I felt from realizing that it does jack shit for helping you get to the next level of life. That is, its most useful aspect was the feeling of 'okay, so I've gone to the ends of the Kosmos within and I still have all this bullshit to take care of -- let's stop fucking around with drugs and lets do something with our lives.' 
I kept denying the fact that no normal person understands the importance of 5-MeO because, to them, its just another kid taking drugs except now that kid has a huge spiritual ego who thinks it makes him a superhuman god and all he has to show for it is repeating the phrase "you don't understand -- it's infinite, you're infinite, we're infinite! It's all a Cosmic game!'
And look, I get that they're largely unawakened and don't understand the history of psychedelics in personal development, but they do have a point - if you're useless before 5-MeO, you're still useless after 5-MeO unless you take total responsibility 
Another way to put it is that, I realized that the difference between Turquoise and Coral is the difference between talking Truth (using one's voice as a way to inspire people at higher levels who already get it anyway) vs embodying Truth (using one's life to inspire people at all levels). As Frank Zane might put it, making one's outside as beautiful as one's inside and vice versa.
Again, 5-MeO will get someone to want to talk Truth -- but the only people who will understand what you're saying already understand what you are saying. 
Embodying Truth physically will inspire Truth in people at all levels. 
How many people on this forum need several years of study before they even begin to understand Eckhart Tolle? Mooji? Ramana Maharshi? It's not that what these guys are saying is wrong per se, but why is it that it takes so many people so many years to get it? They use the wrong medium, as talk is useless when it comes to Truth. 
How many people on this forum need several seconds to understand Bruce Lee? Ido Portal? Rickson Gracie? Laird Hamilton? For these guys living their life is itself a form of True Art - an expression of Truth meant to inspire others. Anyone who watches 5 seconds of these guys feels inspired in the same way that it might take the so-called spiritual masters 5 hours (if you buy their $600 DVD set). Thats the difference. 
The fact that first question you ask after reading the above list is the role of 5-meo, and not the role of any of the other things I did shows me you are asking the wrong damn questions. 
Ask about the role of discipline.
Ask about the role of accountability.
Ask about the role of quitting my addictions.
Ask about the role of finding a reality check mirror.
Ask about the importance of death as a physical practice. 
Psychedelics, NDEs, Holotropic Breathing - those forms of death are for babies.
If 5-MeO got me to where I'm at, then I would stop everything I'm doing, start selling 5-MeO and become the richest man to have ever lived in all times.
 
The MINDBODYSOUL will unlock its true potential only when pushed to its fucking limit in a real life situation that requires complex action for a simple solution, from one's own volition. It makes perfect sense from an evolutionary perspective, as animals only have to put in as much energy as necessary.
Of course you don't know enlightenment or ultimate power because you of course don't need it. you don't need enlightenment to sit around answering forum questions. you don't need enlightenment to make videos. you don't need enlightenment to fill out forms at a desk all day. So why the fuck unlock that power? 
What makes Ralston different from other teachers is not his ability to pontificate about nothing, but the fact that he participated in bloodsport of his own volition.
I'm talking about pushing yourself to the type of death that no one can question, from all angles, from one's own volition.
Most people can easily question psychedelic death. Most people can question holotropic breathe death. And most NDEs come as a result of an accident or someone making a mistake.
No one can question a rear-naked choke. No one can question drowning in a 50-ft wave. No one can question climbing Mt. Everest Shirtless - you chose that shit.
I am one of the few people who've tried both forms of death approach and I can tell you that there is a huge difference that goes beyond all philosophy, all argument, and all discussion - just fucking do it and you will see.
But as long as one sits there searching for an answer by isolating oneself or sitting around staring at a wall or imbibing yet another psychedelic, there's really no reason for the body to unlock itself. 
I will know you got unstuck the moment you start showing your self outside, moving, interacting, doing, and not just talking in your videos. I will know you got unstuck the moment we see you physically tackling your fears and getting yourself into the shape of a warrior. I will know you got unstuck the moment you stop treating physical play like just another thing and you start emphasizing it as one of the ultimate foundations of human development. 
Until then, you shall remain stuck. Worse, your life purpose will be capped off at level turquoise, which sucks because the world really doesn't need yet another turquoise mouth-yapper. And I say that in the most loving way because I feel genuinely helped by you and now I genuinely want to help you. There's literally no one else who is going to tell you that because no one else is aware enough and cares enough. 
So, for Everyone reading this, here's the shit that I did with my life that is way more important than 5-meo ever will be:
Quitting the PMO cycle Quitting Sugar Quitting all drugs, all alcohol, all junk entertainment Exploring new exercise regimens, culminating in the following schedule Monday - Powerlifting  Tuesday - Jiu Jitsu Wednesday - Acroyoga Thursday - Capoeira  Friday - Calisthenics & Sprints Saturday - Hiking Committing to wake up before 9 AM every morning like an adult Writing quality works. Not just journaling. Not just sketching ideas. Not just writing stream-of-conscisouness articles.  Making something that might become a perennial hit every time you sit down to write. Notice that my upvotes per post on this forum is the highest out of anyone with more than 100 posts - even Leo himself. That's not a coincidence. Quality writing is quality thinking - the process of editing for good and bad sentences is itself editing for good and bad ideas.  Put it this way, I wouldn't tackle a difficult mathematics problem without writing down the variables on paper. So, why would contemplating a life problem be any different? Life's problems have far more variables than mathematics problems. Write down your best ideas on the nature of love, the nature of life, the nature of consciousness. Edit them so that no one can touch your arguments when it comes to communication - then you will see that no one can touch you when it comes to dominating life.  Reading quality material, not random listicles Cultivating quality relationships, excising any and all people who hold me back from higher potential. Making sure my top 5 people will leave legacies - anyone that you know will not leave a legacy must be excised, no exceptions if you don't have 5 people like this in your life, find them. Your lack of people to trust is not a sign that you're an enlightened genius, but a sign that you're a boring asshole. Only you can stop you from being an asshole. So stop letting yourself be so lonely - start being the type of person who provides so much value, others come along. For real, the isolation I see around here is unacceptable bullshit. Wake up and provide value. Period. Getting a reality-check mirror - someone interested in self-actualization at my same level who could help me iron out self-derived principles Refusing to date anyone who does not meet the Trinity rule  If I see myself as badass as Neo, then I will only date someone as badass as Trinity. If I am not as badass as Neo, then I will make sure I am so that I am ready for my trinity.  Taking 100% responsibility for my life Writing down a vision for what could go right in my life as well as a vision for the chaos and misery that will ensue if I don't take action. Do this stuff before taking 5-MeO and you will be ready to take 5-MeO. Do this stuff after 5-MeO and you will unlock the most amazing life imaginable. 
5-MeO is an excuse to say you've gone as far as possible with psychedelics so you can move on with your life. Because if that couldn't save you, then life really is all about taking ownership. But it will be the direct proof of this fact that will help you. 
So, to be clear, I highly highly recommend people take 5-MeO. Just don't think it will ever replace the other stuff.

Well, you have to contemplate the very nature of life to understand this idea of "world peace" and "no more evil".
Consider that to be alive one must destroy and kill. At the most fundamental level, life needs to take energy from other life in order to live because it is one, and so cannot get energy elsewhere.
Even if you somehow miraculously made every human a sage, all those sages would still need to kill to live. Even if they all became vegans, human cities still kill millions of animals just with their footprint alone. So this "world peace" wouldn't really be world peace, it would be peace for 1 species out of millions of other species. The only way you could call it "peace" is by saying "no other being's suffering matters but humans". Which wouldn't be a very sage-like position.
The true sage understands that suffering, inequality, death, and "evil" are absolutely necessary, making his peace with that fact, rather than trying to turn the world into a hippie Care Bear kingdom, where nobody's farts stink.
Reality is brutal and impersonal. It will find ways to fuck your peace. What happens when robots rise up and exterminate mankind the same way mankind exterminates ants? Will you be at peace with that? It sure will be peaceful when all the humans are dead and AIs of much higher consciousness are running the show. But my guess is, humans won't think of that as "world peace", they will think if it as the greatest evil.

Realize that PMO is the highest correlative sign of depression besides maybe literally attempting suicide. That is, more than almost anything else, the more you PMO the more depressed you are. So, as you do anything to stop PMO, you end up doing something to prevent depression. 
Seriously, you need to understand this because its important: STOP PMO AND YOU STOP MOST OF DEPRESSION.
PMO might not cause depression, or it might not be depression, but it's one of the biggest check engine lights you might have. 
So, set stopping PMO as a high priority and don't let anything get in the way of that.
Moreover, you can't follow actualized.org if you don't take responsibility for your life. Period.
But letting PMO stop you shows a major sign of irresponsibility. You're letting your dick take over your life. It's pathetic. I mean, how do you expect to change your life and change the world if you can't even take responsibility for your own dick?
So, make a commitment. Envision the life that’s possible and then envision what happens when you don’t take action. Then, when urges pop up, just find new shit to do with yourself. 
Also check out Improvement Pill's work on the topic on YouTube. He has a whole thing called the Tamed course that's fantastic.
Also Check out the book the 4 tendencies. 

Hey guys. Hope you're all good. After my awakening and permanent self-realization in May, 2017 my spiritual interest died down a lot. My participation on this forum went down, my spiritual practices came to an end and my whole journey imploded. This happened because I found the answers and tranquillity I looked for when I started. The answer that awakening and permanent self-realization gives you is the vanishing of the question you posed in the beginning of your journey. Your whole conceptual world comes to an end (mostly) and you live, think and talk mostly spontaneously and not pre-mediated. That's quite nice.
In the beginning of this new phase I had to adjust my entire life to this situation, so I needed quite a bit of time for that. A lot of new experiences and perspectives opened up to me and I took my time to investigate those. Right now it's the end of 2017 and I am still stable in non-dual awareness and mostly not contracted in my body. I also start to deepen my self-realization and push it towards "God Awareness" to go on with my journey. So I figure it's time to let you in on the techniques I researched and developed shortly before I woke up and that helped me to wake up permanently.
+++ Enter Azrael's Awakening Anchor #1 | How To Solve Emotional Suffering +++
I'm a big proponent of meditation. It's a great practice and the basis of everything we do. If you cannot sit with yourself and enjoy it, how can you ever understand your self? However, as we meditate and go on with our journey it gets clear that regular meditation is too slow and mild of a practice to give us the transformation that we want. That's why we have to develop accelerators on top of this basis.
The process I'll describe in a second is such a accelerator. It was developed by myself in January - February of 2017 and is based on a few other practices I know. It's main purpose is to solve emotional suffering and contraction of energy in your body. One of the big reasons you are not enlightened and always go back to sleep after a temporary awakening is that your body and mind are full of contractions that keep your ego in place. It is the energetic anchor in the nervous system that makes your ego, persona and body feel quite real and connected. It also makes your suffering feel quite real.
The method was tested on myself, @Huz and a friend of mine. I used it maybe 5-10 times in a span of 3 weeks to get rid of a lot of emotional suffering and contraction in my body. I did it with @Huz and he did it on himself as well and it died down most of his social anxiety almost instantly. My other friend cured most of his anger and had weeks of temporary awakening experiences after we did the technique once.
In my opinion the technique works best when you do it on someone else. The shift that happens seems to be deeper and its good to have someone to lead the process. However, it is possible to do it on yourself and still have a lot of changes happening. I am thinking right now to give away 3 free skype sessions for you guys to do this process - led by me. If you are interested, let me know in the comments. Also, I'm thinking to make a product out of this and help people with this process over a couple of weeks + consultation (also via a series of skype sessions). So if you'd be interested in that, let me know as well.
+++ The Technique: An Interview With Your Inner Children +++
The process is rooted in the observation that all of the egoic and unintegrated roles that your ego plays arise from an contraction of your basic emotions
fear / sadness anger / rage happiness / inspiration love Every role that you play takes the raw energy of a subset of these emotions, contracts them in your body / mind and lets a thought story arise out of this contraction to express the energy. The problem is that these roles -> thought stories -> contracted emotions -> raw contraction of energy are anchored in your body / mind (aka nervous system) and get triggered all throughout your day. Because you have a lot these contracted roles and one role can trigger another role, you live in the illusion of a conceptual world of suffering.
if you were to experience a subset of these 4 basic emotions in their uncontracted normal form, you wouldn't suffer. You would only have an intense, emotional experience. That's why it sometimes feels good to be in anger / rage or to melt in fear / sadness. Although other times, it seems like it destroys you (-> contraction).
Based on this conceptualized observation, we need to find a way to unravel these contractions to let them out of your system. One very direct way to do this is to give a subconscious, uncontrolled emotion a conscious voice to express its situation and to understand its position.
+++ The Technique's Technicalities +++
The actual technique works in the following way (if you do it on yourself).
Sit down comfortably on a chair / cushion. Repeat the following steps for every basic emotion {fear / sadness, anger / rage,  happiness / inspiration, love} Close your eyes and visualize a moment in your life in which you experienced the current emotion very strongly. Let your whole body sink into the emotion. Let it arise where it typically arises in your body. Think the thoughts it triggers when it comes up. In other words: Let the damn thing come on. Interview the emotion. That means ask the emotion a question and then answer the question from the standpoint of the emotion. Your questions should aim to "get to know" the emotion, its purpose, goal, its relationships with people, other emotions, yourself and the work that it does for you. Find a way with the current emotion to work better together with it in the future. That means work out a solution so that it can flow freely and you can live with it uncontracted and free. Open your eyes, stretch, think about what the emotion said and how you can live with that and go on with the next one. When you start working with this technique you will have to "play" the emotion's role. That means that you ask a question and you have to answer it from the perspective of the emotion. After doing this for 2-3 minutes, the emotion will come on so strongly that it'll take over and it will feel very real. I had numerous psychedelic-like experiences doing this technique. You might also experience big shifts in consciousness / awareness + a big opening of your body.
+++ An Interviewer's Template For Each Emotion +++
To make the process even simpler, I'll share with you a template that I developed over time that works quite well. Use this in this order for every emotion you interview and add follow-up / deepening questions for your own usecase:
Question: Who are you? Possible Answer: I am fear. Question: How do you feel? Possible Answer: I feel quite ... Question: Where are you located in my body when you arise? Possible Answer: I typically arise in your ... Question: How and when do you arise? Possible Answer: I come up when ... Question: When was the first time you can remember that you came up? Possible Answer: When you were ... years old, I came up while you were ... Question: What is your job and main goal? Possible Answer: My job is to protect you from ... Question: Do you sometimes work together with other emotions? If yes, with which and how? Possible Answer: Yeah, I sometimes work together with ... Question: Do you have enemies? If so, which ones and why? Possible Answer: Yeah, I hate ...          [...]
Question: What could we do to live more integrated together in the future? Possible Answer: You'd have to ... I hope you get the idea. Your main goal here is to fully understand and characterize every basic emotion and through that integrate it. It's very important when you do the interview, that you speak as "I the interviewer" and "I the emotion" so that you fully identify with your current position. It'll be strange at first, an then it'll be awesome and deep. Trust me.
+++ Further Notes +++
So that's the basic technique. When you do it with someone else over a series of times there are more elements to it. But this is the main bullet that you need to do it with yourself. if you do it formally as I described it, close your eyes throughout the interview of each emotion an then open your eyes at the end of each interview and contemplate what just happened and what to with it. Then get out of your current state (as good as it might feel) and hop on to the next emotion.
Explore how they work together, where they come from, how they contract and how they are triggered. Get the most accurate characterisation of each emotion on the intellectual, emotional and energetic level that you can get. Especially the first few times you do it, get deep and take your time. You'll notice a big release of tension in each sitting and after it which will be permanent.
When you notice throughout the day that you feel contracted, you can also make a mini-interview and just ask yourself "Fear, are you that? Rage is it you? ..." and ask what is happening and why it is happening. That'll in most cases end your contraction pretty fast and bring you an even deeper understanding of your emotions.
--
Try it! Let me know how it works for you and ask any questions that you have. Are you interested in a one-on-one skype session with me leading this? Maybe I'll throw 3 free sessions out there, if you guys are interested and it works for you. Are you interested in me making a product out of this, where we'd have multiple skype sessions with consultations + this technique over a period of time to integrate your emotions completely? Let me know. I will think about that.
Anyway, I'm looking forward to make more of these Azrael's Awakening Anchors to share what helped me to wake up. Peace out and be good to yourself.
Cheers,
Az

I loved reading your trip report, it was very interesting.  
I've only had glimpses as well, but with every life changing experience, it followed with becoming very acquainted with death.  Sitting in the moment, seeing, smelling, feeling, breathing, and sinking so into the very moment like it is your last.  And knowing that someday it will be.
I believe one of the biggest preparations we can do for ourselves is to dance with death as though she were a faithful friend.  
Your trip sounds like facing Kali (god/death/infinity) with fear and the key is to approach her with love.  
Psychedelics can help with insights and catching glimpses of the devine, but from my experience mastering your death is also another route one can take.
Could you face death at this time with peace and love?

@Sahil Pandit Your problem is that you're only giving out love to get love, like a tit-for-tat. That's not real love. Real love is given without expecting anything in return.
The problem isn't that you love too much, it's that you don't love enough, and you put selfish expectations on it.
Love isn't about getting, it's about giving.
Real unconditional love isn't chimpery. Chimpery is conditional love, and trying to get other people to love you because you don't really love yourself.

Hi guys!  I am a guy who has suffered from depression since adolescence.
I remember it would come from lack of acceptance from the opposite sex mostly.
Then as I got older from lack of meaning in my work.
I would beat myself up for not being better and even for getting depressed and not being grateful.  
I would manipulate myself alot to be the kind of guy girls wanted to be with.
I have and still struggle at times with self acceptance.
 
After 3 ayahuasca trips and a 5 meo trip I can honestly say I don't see myself ever getting into a long period of depression ever again.
I wanted to share some things that might help.
 
The obvious stuff you already know:  diet, exercise, meditation, reading, sunlight, any and all personal development, social activities, trying to make decent friends, etc.
 
Also:  Ayahuasca is really healing.  Medicine for the soul.
 
Now a few things I think are key:
1.
Be honest.  Try and find someone that will listen and accept you in your state.  One of the things that I would do is not try to be depressed with people, or to stay alone to not “bring them down”   That is not really healthy.  Yes lots of people can't deal with your depression and will invalidate you or reject you, or try and distract you.  But certain people can be amazing.  They will listen to you, hug you, let you cry.  Basically accept you as you are and not need you to change.
That is what you need.  Just one person like that can make all the difference.
2.
Let yourself be depressed!  Soak yourself in it and don't try to fight it and make an enemy out of it.  Give your depression its freedom. You are lacking in love, both external and internal.  Let yourself be depressed while you do things that are loving towards yourself, whatever they may be.
Once I developed enough consciousness over my depression in my last heartbreak (there have been many)  I would even hear a commentary from my mind that would say “Man, poor dude.  I hope this guy feels better soon”  
Be that accepting compassionate person for yourself.
3.
Touch.  Get a massage, or any body work, ask for a hug.  Physical loving contact is incredible at bringing out the trauma, the hurt, and healing it.  
4.
Try not blame and take things personally.  It's the hardest thing to do.  We blame ourselves and others.  We make things really personal and feel a huge weight of the world on our shoulders.
There's a larger process going on, and for some reason your depression is playing a part in it.  There are many, many mechanisms at work, nobody really knows what's ultimately going on with life.
You did what you had to do, suffered what you had to suffer.  Now it's time to let go of the suffering little by little.
 
Good luck!  Hope this helps someone.