Hsinav

Exactly, thats part of why I wrote it!

So, you also liked the soup?

I added some garam masala spice and parsley, very nice!

I´v only had one breakthrough experience so far. It is hard to remember the trip but the glimpses I remember are enough for me to know. Like waking up from a dream. I became conscious of the fact that I was the life force itself and that nothing else exists for real. After the trip I look at other people/lifeforms different, knowing that the life that animates there forms are the deepest me. It was a chock coming down from the trip but in the middle of the trip there were just peace without any thoughts or questions. This experience have pushed me in the right direction and has helped me to know what to go for in my meditation practice. I go back to this glimpses of infinity almost everyday and that makes me calm, joyful and peaceful.

Good one for me too, had to give space for a lot of acceptance today, and the space was there!

I´m in sunday 1800 GMT ?

The sneaky thing with alcohol is that at first you actually get more conscious (thats my experience anyway) but that only lasts a short period of time, then you drink more trying to reach that state again (this is happening to the vast majority of people unconsciously) which is impossible and instead you will just get more and more unconscious in the exact proportions of the amount you consume. So at first when you drink you are rising a bit above thoughts, then after a while you are falling down to the "animal level" which life will hit you in the face for later on, the paradox is that many people wakes up this way, but this is the hard way and it is not necessary. To hang around people that drink and don´t drink yourself is very difficult, but possible.

Yes, it is all about you

@Martin123 Thanks!

I can now myself, confirm that this method of converting freebase to fumerate works!

Matt is unique, this is so profound,

Knowing your true nature is the only thing that can make you happy, really. Money can be (and often is I think) useful in that process.

One of the most beautiful talks i´v ever heard.

Great!

@Barna Thank you, just love your signature too!

Very wise!

This video is an absolute miracle!

The only experience with psychedelics before this is a handful mushroom trips, a normal day for me is busy with business, family, cats and all other things. Pretty normal western society lifestyle on the outside. Well I had this experience yesterday and today I just feel a little bit tired, tomorrow i´m off but on monday I´ll will have a monster week at work, so I can only take it step by step. I would probably be able to integrate this better if I didn't have to go to work, but who knows...I now know there is an infinite power in me, so I don´t see "normal" work as a big problem.

So I´v been sitting on my 5-meo not using it for months now , one reason for that is that I have had enormous respect for this substance and that I don´t want to leave anything by chance when tripping, even though I knew deep inside that´s not possible with this substance. So finally this week I had my first trip, my plan was to move forward really slow and safe with this so I tried to weigh out 10mg on my scale, turned into 11mg, had a hot shower, half a cop of coffee, half a spoon of honey, got myself together and snorted it up. I was expecting a hell of a burn in the nose but it was not that bad at all, just a little sensation. I layed down on the bed in my hotel room opened up my body and did some conscious breathing - inhale on 1,2,3,4,5,6 then micropause and exhale on 1,2,3,4,5,6, through the nose the slowest and deepest I could, waiting for the kick in. After 5-7 min I felt things started to happen, my heart was beating faster and faster and I just continued counting 1,2,3... Then after 12-14 min I knew I had made it through the come up and the plateau was coming. Very, very nice, I became very peaceful, still and happy. I have been so afraid for this! I thought, ok it was only 11mg but still...now I know how to do it. I looked out through the window and I saw some green grass, threes, a dutch truck with som orange and green colours, and birds. Everything was telling me - come play with us, it´s a play. I felt joy and warmth in my heart. Everything looked so still, peaceful and in a flow, like in slowmotion. After 1 hour I was back to base, happier than before and with no side effects from the trip. A very mild and positive first trip. Second trip, this time I took 18 mg with the same set and setting but in the nighttime. The com up went good this time too, when the plateau came this time it was very different from the first time, my sense of time disappeared, I layed down in my bed with closed eyes and it felted like a vast hole opened up inside of me from very it pored out light and fire, very beautiful and hard to describe. I knew that I had touched something that I´ve never touched before inside of me. Third trip, because i wanted to play this safe when last time was very powerful and mysterious I,ll do 13mg this time I and work on with my technic, I thought. So I weight out 13mg and it hits me that the scale didn't respond to the first grains i was putting in and it did look a lot more than last time, but since I had just calibrated this new expensive scale I didn't give it a second thought. (the dot that indicate that the scale is straight was totally out of position, didn't even know that there was a dot for that on the scale, the amount I had weight up was approximately 30-40mg I realized later.) Now I snorted this like a walk in the park, layed down on the bed and counted 1,2,3...after 10 min this hits me so hard and I just know something must have been wrong on the scale. My heart was beating like never before and I felt I was going far away, oh fuck I'm breaking through was my last thought. Then very mysterious things happen and I was in total bliss, even though I vas feeling very sick most of the time and on the edge of throwing up. This state that I used to hate more than anything, when you´re about to throw up! Now I didn´t even want it to be different, because I knew - it can´t be different. After maybe 30 min I went to the toilet, looked at myself in the mirror and laughed. So you finally made it, you found me I said quiet, knowing that I had access to an enormous power that had nothing to do with this body. There is no-one home in this person that i´m looking at, just a shell, everything that is worth something is flowing through this shell. This shell is just something because of the one life that is flowing through it. Nothing comes from this shell. Now, this moment God have found itself through this shell that was nothing but an empty shell all the time, what a play! At this point I had no questions, nothing could be more beautiful than this, everything was answered because I didn't have a need to know anything. The day after - I´m a little bit confused now and I will now work to integrate this in my everyday life which will be quite a task. 5-Meo has shown me my true nature. Looking back, the thoughts and fears around this substance that I had was way worse than it was to actually take it.

Haha The paradox is, you have to know they are difficult before you know they are not difficult.

Wow!

Lyrics Lightning crashes a new mother cries Her placenta falls to the floor The angel opens her eyes The confusion sets in Before the doctor can even close the door Lightning crashes an old mother dies Her intentions fall to the floor The angel closes her eyes The confusion that was hers Belongs now to the baby down the hall Oh now feel it, comin' back again Like a rollin', thunder chasing the wind Forces pullin' from The center of the earth again I can feel it. Lightning crashes a new mother cries This moment she's been waiting for The angel opens her eyes Pale blue colored iris Presents the circle And puts the glory out to hide, hide Oh now feel it, comin' back again Like a rollin', thunder chasing the wind Forces pullin' from The center of the earth again I can feel it. Oh now feel it, comin' back again Like a rollin', thunder chasing the wind Forces pullin' from The center of the earth again I can feel it. Oh now feel it, comin' back again Like a rollin', thunder chasing the wind Forces pullin' from The center of the earth again I can feel it.

Great one!

Until this point my life has been a fog. A fog that was so heavy I never realized it was a fog. The fog is still here but now I recognise it. Now when the light is coming through the fog, it gets so clear - I have been striving and fighting for things just like little childs fight for there toys. From an adults perspective it looks so silly but for the child, strong emotional feelings arise as it was a life and death matter. Just like that, it feels like I have grown up from adulthood and now watch the adults striving and fighting for things very similar to the child. Same mechanism as the kids but way more sophisticated. They know the alley in every game they play, not recognise it as a game. What I thought would be the best possible situation I could put myself in, was the opposite. Ultimate bondage in the disguise of freedom. Now I know, things will never be the same again

Papaji also was a great teacher.