Gladius

@studentofthegame Your 2020 sounds promising. I'm confident all this shadow work is paying off. Merry Christmas, actualization buddy!

2019 mistakes / regrets / improvement opportunities: - Wasting time on social media. - Not being authentic / honest to myself and others. - Daygame. - Money and time wasted in stupid self-help products. 2019 accomplishments: - Finally faced my PTSD via therapy and book-reading and made big improvement. Big shout-out to Pete Walker, Joe Dispenza and Nathaniel Branden. - Started a couple interesting creative projects with professional expectations.. - Had a successful date with an old crush. - Built a powerful exercise routine. - NoFap (No Porn and fapping once a week). - MDMA experience. - Started smoking and quit 4 months after 2020 goals / Wish list: - Paying the bills with my creativity. - Building a strong intimate relationship (girlfriend) - Working on financial health and money management. - Shifting to more fun and fulfilling ways to exercise (martial arts, team sports...). - Moving to a healthier and more comfortable hood. - Improving assertiveness. - Falling in love with all my clothes / Renew wardrobe. - Eliminating every fear / block regarding women. - Building a meditation habit. - Building a reading habit. Merry Xmas everyone!

@Austin Actualizing Thank you so much! Yes, I'm trying to avoid specially porn. This year I relapsed just a couple times, so I'm pretty happy about it!

Just read Breaking the habit of being yourself by Joe Dispenza. I usually like Dispenza's approach on self-development, but in my opinion this book is life-changing. I loved the part where it explains how the brain cells work and why they tend to produce same chemicals over and over again. The theory about how thought affects the quantum field we're living also makes sense. Whether it's scientifically accurate or not, I have no clue, but it's making me really aware of each and everyone of my thoughts, and being in charge of the feelings they generate. Hope this awareness sticks with me for a long time, because it feels great. This book is available for free online.

Sounds like a positive balance to me. The year's not over yet though Keep it up!

This "focusing on myself" motto is working. My neediness is decreasing and I can sense that from thinking level. Same thing until last year. Next habit I want to get back is meditation, but I'll review that after Xmas. - Hitting the gim 3 times a week or more if possible. - NoFap and Social Media: Bringing awareness.

@studentofthegame Not at all! I just love english language since young age. In spanish "lectura" means reading, that's where my mistake comes from

@studentofthegame About the books, I just read the Nathaniel Branden one and found it brilliant. I think Pete Walker gets a lot of inspiration from him and John Bradshaw. Absolutely recommended. Looking forward to your "post game" review and goals for the decade ahead.

@studentofthegame Sorry, excuse my terrible english. By recommended "lecture" I meant "reading".

Cool journal. Looks like you're really focused on self-love, and got it well handled. Keep it up!

Focusing on myself and setting healthy habits is definitely working. Goals for December: Back to basics. - Going to the gim at least 3 times a week. - NoFap. This is something I can improve. - Social media: Raising awareness about Twitter and Facebook use. Recommended lecture: "Six pillars of self-esteem" by Nathaniel Branden, and that gave me many "aha" moments. Have a nice day.

Good vibrations these days. I got a call from a guy I met a couple years ago. Seems he remembered we had a passionate conversation back then and asked me to join a small creative project of his. We're still in stage 0 and it's going to be a long road, but I'm so happy about it whatever happens. Even though my goal in my last post was having no goals, I do need / want to take care of this. Otherwise, same actions as stated: taking care of myself, putting the focus on the well-being of mind and body all the time. Have a nice day.

This is just a recommendation for those who suffer from depression or anxiety. I've tried recently these hypericum pills or "st. John's wort" in english. They're usually available in the supermarket, (at least in Europe), usually next to the vitamins place, since it's a natural product. I've been taking a couple of them in the morning for a week and it does stable the mood. Seems like a good natural alternative to antidepressants. so I thought it could help someone here.

@studentofthegame At the moment I'm not. I'm just going to the gim, but it's so boring. On January I might try a mugendo academy close to my place.

@studentofthegame That's exactly the point, in better words than the ones I used. Thank you, sir, your feedback is always key. No pressure

@Michael569 Sure. I guess I was too simplistic on my post. Never replace professional medical advice. I was talking about mild depression, that sadness state one can drag for months or years. For me it just helped to flip the table, plus all the other action I took.

@Raptorsin7 Of course that alone is not the final solution, but it really helped to light up my mood, so I wanted to share here. I also looked at the root causes of my depression and took action: Found a good therapist, looked for another job, read a lot of books, and so on, but you guys already know that...

Here we go, one more Thursday here. My goal of interning for a creative job has not been accomplished (yet). These last weeks, I've been a bit confused, chasing jobs and women with barely any order or purpose. And, spoiler alert, the results are not good. It's been exhausting. For the rest of the year I'm gonna focus on taking care of myself physically, mentally, and emotionally. That's probably a bigger challenge than any external goals I could set. Physically: Back to the gym, at least 3 times a week. Getting in touch with gym colleagues to train together. Trying to keep a routine despite shift changes. Definitely quit smoking. Keeping healthy diet. Mentally: Decreasing TV and screen time. Observing thoughts. Not rushing. Emotionally: Being selective about my social life. Setting boundaries with people who leaves me emotional hangovers after meeting. Connecting with family and friends who matter. That's it. I'm not forgetting my purpose of writing creatively somehow, but I need to rest a little bit, at least until Christmas. Next year we'll review that. Have a nice day!

@studentofthegame Cool, sounds a great way of exploring your fears. Martials arts are the best way of exercising: You get to move your body, working on strength, balance and cardio, it gives you confidence and you socialize with like-minded people. I did a couple years of muay thai and always looking forward to go back. Keep it up.

@studentofthegame Thank you my friend, I won't be too hard on myself but after new year's eve I'll review goals for sure.

No news, still here. Keeping same goals: - Looking for a creative job, regardless of the money. - Dating life: Met again with this girl. We're slowly getting to know each other. That's fine for me, I'm not overthinking about this. - Health: Trying to keep up. I barely exercised during last weeks. In my free time, tiredness and stress have taken over. That's life. Have a nice day.

The pitch was held a week ago. It looks like the audience liked it, but none of us have feedback from our project. This has been my main goal for the last year. It's time to move on, regardless of the results of the course. Job: Proactive daily search on job portals. Dating life: Hanging out with the girl I met a couple weeks before. Being open-minded about it. Health: Decreased carbohydrates intake, and feeling good. Exercising 3 or 4 times a week. Therapist suggested to keep support sessions once every 3 weeks. Good vibrations. Have a nice day.

@studentofthegame Sorry to hear that. For sure periods of illness or crisis triggers low-consciousness activities like porn or smoking. Keep going. Thanks for the advice on journaling!

My plan for this week is mainly to go back to the dating scene. I'm texting with two different girls I expect to meet soon. One of them, we met 2 weeks ago. I was invited by a friend of him at her birthday party. I sensed some chemistry, and after much alcohol, we ended up making out. The other girl, I met her online a few days ago. I'm already feeling kinda guilty to do this. I'm not sure how wrong is it for me or for them. However, I'm trying to not overthink stuff, so I'll just jump into it. I'll come back with some set of "suggested rules" regarding health. Have a nice day

@studentofthegame Journaling is a great tool. A simple trick I heard on a Ted talk is to remind yourself the best 3 moments of the day when going to bed, every single night for a month. It'll become a habit and it worked for me. Regarding therapy, a couple comments: - According to Pete Walker, a good moment to leave your therapist is when you find at least one trustworthy and reliable partner or friend who can be your new confident. As a rule of thumb, of course. - My therapist uses EMDR. It can be challenging and tough to face so much emotions in a moment, but it worked wonders. Keep it up!