MattP

@SoonHei Thanks for the reply! What you said makes sense. Just kind of sucks for some people. But there must be a reason for it. I try not to compare myself to others. It is hard sometimes, especially when i am struggling to find my 'real' purpose here. You see what others are doing, and you think: maybe i should be doing that? But anyway, i can accept that everyone is at different levels. And i am where i am. Thanks

@WelcometoReality I guess what I'm struggling with, is that i have to put forth a lot of conscience effort to improve myself and be a better person. More specifically, just treating people better, accepting them, and loving them. The frustration is that some people don't have to put in any effort. It just comes natural. And yes, i have felt like giving up on self development several times. But i won't. Thanks for the reply!

Does anyone feel that some people are born enlightened? Or at least have a predisposition to become enlightened with little or no effort? Have you ever met that person who just seems to have their shit together, and just seems to understand life? I feel that for whatever reason, there are people whom are blessed, and then those whom are not so blessed. Maybe this has something to do with intelligence, or a lack there of. It's like there are these people who don't need to do any spiritual work, because they already understand. And the rest are left to struggle and suffer through life, trying to find a meaning for it all. Someone made a comment the other day that made me think. They said "only depressed people meditate." I don't agree, but i had to think about it for a bit. Is spiritual/enlightenment work only for people who 'don't get it.' While there are people who 'do get it' that don't need to work on self development? I know for a fact that no matter who you are, you can always grow. I just think maybe there are some who were given 'the gift.' Maybe that's just how it's supposed to be.

@Maximus yeah, that sounds right. Lately ive been responding to the ego based fear too much. Its hard not to, when your identity is threatened. And i think everyone still has that ego somewhere, whether they will admit it or not. It just needs to be tested before it surfaces. Thanks

If it's all wrong. Then I guess it would all be right as well. And we could just believe whatever feels best to us. I'm not sure, i think there is a common purpose for all. There has got to be. Right? The questions i have in my post are pretty much unanswerable. But Leo has already been able to answer some questions i thought i could never get an answer to. That's why im biting on to the content taught in actualized.org. it just clicks with me, and makes the most sense. I will always have questions. I've had several enlightenment moments, but i have a long way to go. Thanks

@Sussso im not sure why it wont let me open a new text box, but whatever. Well that's good. Maybe you wont be as addicted to the other things, and they will be easier to transition out of. The void is a terrifying place because it resembles death. But if you can meditate through the terror of it, the void turns into a peaceful place. You can try that when, and if you are ever ready. Like 20 minutes per day of meditation. Doesn't sound like much, but even that amount made me less stressed throughout the day. Must be done every day though, for it to work. Not just one day here and there. Good luck. If you quit video games, then what will you do with all that time? Will it be something more productive than video games? If not, then there really is no point. Right? The hardest part is filling that void. Or thinking that you need to fill that void. You don't necessarily need to fill the void, but you might go crazy if you don't. Self actualization work is supposed to get you comfortable with living within that void. And for me, i have failed time and time again. I have quit a few addictions, (drinking, vaping) and honestly, i don't feel any better. I actually think i feel worse. And waking up to see the reality you have created for yourself may, or may not be terrifying. That's what causes people to latch back on to their addictions. Too hard to accept their reality. Playing video games is most likely a big part of your identity. That is what makes it so hard to stop. It is who you are. It is you. How do you just kill off that part of yourself? Well...keep listening to Leo. And actually practice some of the stuff in the videos. And keep at it. That would be my best advice.

So, i was just thinking. Like i usually overdo. I was thinking about "purpose of life." I have been following Leo since his first videos came out, (off and on.) I have managed to wrap my 'limited capacity' brain around much of the content. But i haven't really experienced a lot of it. I am by no means "enlightened." My inquiry is this: If this (life, people, everything) is ultimately a singularity, how do we ever get away from that in the first place, and why? What is the purpose? What i mean is; when we are born, we begin our journey drifting in the other direction. Becoming an individual separate from everyone else. Why is that? Are people just teaching other humans from infancy the wrong thing? Or is there more to it than that. Does the new baby immediately know that he/she has been cut loose from a much bigger entity, and is now free to create it's own identity and reality? Why is it ever given a chance? Seems that the purpose in life is to find your way back home. To the mothership. But still, how do we ever get away from it in the first place? And why? Is it like some test or something? If we are all "one" how are we so clever to trick ourselves into thinking that there are individuals separate from you and me? And if there are never any actual individuals tricking themselves, than who is doing the tricking? And once again, why? This is too deep to think about. So, we were once part of the singularity, somehow that broke, and a bunch of pieces went flying everywhere. Those pieces are all of us humans, and everything else in every universe percieved to be a self, or single object. Now our purpose is to go home? To be one with everything once again. Sounds crazy, but i'm trying to figure it out.

I recently quit drinking, and the worst part of it all for me was waking up to the reality i had created for myself. Alcohol is used as a mask, so we don't have to think, or care about our problems. So i was drinking to ignore certain things, and it felt good. So if you are serious about quitting, you have to be willing to accept anything you may be masking with alcohol. This can be very painful. Not sure if that is the case with you, but just saying. I want to drink every day because i am not happy. But i am toughing it out, no matter how painful it is. Hoping payoff will come soon. But man i want a drink! Being sober will allow you to start making corrections with your behavior towards others. You may start to notice your relationships improving. I have noticed, and it feels good. So that's the other thing. If you don't care about killing yourself with alcohol, think about others in your life who would benefit from you quitting. Thinking about that is what ultimately allowed me to quit. Quitting drinking will be painful, no doubt. Before you do it, be willing, and ready for a bombardment of reality. Just take it! And start making positive changes.

Good luck. If you quit video games, then what will you do with all that time? Will it be something more productive than video games? If not, then there really is no point. Right? The hardest part is filling that void. Or thinking that you need to fill that void. You don't necessarily need to fill the void, but you might go crazy if you don't. Self actualization work is supposed to get you comfortable with living within that void. And for me, i have failed time and time again. I have quit a few addictions, (drinking, vaping) and honestly, i don't feel any better. I actually think i feel worse. And waking up to see the reality you have created for yourself may, or may not be terrifying. That's what causes people to latch back on to their addictions. Too hard to accept their reality. Playing video games is most likely a big part of your identity. That is what makes it so hard to stop. It is who you are. It is you. How do you just kill off that part of yourself? Well...keep listening to Leo. And actually practice some of the stuff in the videos. And keep at it. That would be my best advice.

@cetus56 I've been chewing on your response for a while. Not sure if I have the capacity to fully understand. What I did take away is: Time is not really going slow or fast, it just is. I need to stop falling "to" something, and fall "through" something. Can I really understand singularity in this life? Furthermore, is this life "this life?" Or is it just an illusion? I'm confused. What are we supposed to do? In religion, we worship God, or Gods. Religious people can reach an enlightened state, and think they have it all figured out. Is "singularity" a form of religion? What is it? Is it just a belief? Like I said earlier, I do not consider myself to be enightened yet, but I have an obsession to know the real truth. How can we ever really know? Does it just hit you like a ton of bricks one day? Anyway, I have many hours of contemplating to do. Seeking the truth is a life long journey. I was really just hoping there was something I could do "short term" to give me the illusion that time is not going by faster each year. Maybe it's not that easy. Thank you very much for your response. It instigated some deep thought process for me. And I am still thinking. Anything else you can offer would be much appreciated.

I know I am not alone in the experience I will describe next. The experience has to do with the relationship of age and how fast time goes by. Why is it that with every year I grow older, time goes by faster? It is like a long fall. The fall starts slowly, but the longer you fall, the faster your descent. Is there a terminal velocity to be reached at some age? Or do the years just keep going by faster, and faster until death. If anyone knows how to halt, or reverse this process, I am all ears.

Wow! I don't even know what to say. Thank you so much for that post. That is just what I needed. The majority of people around me do not encourage me to seek out the truth, or pursue enlightenment. I've heard things like, "those videos aren't helping you, so quit wasting your time." Sometimes I believe them. I mean, they are right in a sense. You can watch as many videos, or read as many books as you want, all day long, but if you don't practice what the books and videos are telling you to do, they are pointless. I have had difficulty with the practicing part. I really appreciate your wise words, and thank you for giving me some encouragement to get back on the right track.

Biggest obstacles are: Staying on track. There are times when I feel there is absolutely no point in pursuing self actualization. I thought I found my life purpose, (to make other people better) but I am a failure. I think I only make people worse. Therefore, I get discouraged. Unworthy. I don't feel like I am worthy of a life filled with joy, happiness, and enlightenment. Maybe I deserve all of the bullshit and drama in my life. I subconsciously love to be punished for something. Don't know what it is, just feel like I deserve it. What did I do in my past life? Belief. Can my life really be better? Maybe everyone was dealt their hand at birth, and there is absolutely nothing that can be done about it. I hope not. I want to change so bad. I want to be a better person. I want to care. I want to love. I want to help others. I want to be self actualized... I don't truly believe I can do it.

@Lord Bwyra I love the way you think. The supplements I am after are ones that will keep me sharp, focused, organized and efficient. Unfortunately, like many other people, I am a slave to society. At this point my path to enlightment has disappeared. I am lost. I was hoping to find something that is clinically proven to boost mental power so I can function at the highest level possible without pursuing enlightenment. It's not that I don't want to, It's just that I have fallen off the enlightenment train, and it has left me behind. I could give lots of excuses, but you know what they say about excuses. I have already heard from several people that these supplements don't truly work. I still think that some do help; but I have came to the realization that there is no miracle pill. What I really need now is a kick in the ass to get back on the track to enlightenment. Just sucks that I don't have the patience, discipline, and will to better myself right now. I am the only one to blame for this, and I am the one who controls my life. Just have to really want to make a change... Maybe tomorrow. Have a good night.

Why are you so jealous of what other people are doing? And why can't you do the same thing as the people you envy? What is holding you back? Do you have a fear of rejection? I think the reason you are having this problem has a lot to do with how you were programmed as a child. Correct me if I'm wrong, but the people you judge, and envy are doing things you wish you could do. But you subconsciencly can't, because your brain was programmed to accept these things as evil, or unnacceptable. Therefore, you are stuck in a rut, and can never enjoy the pleasures of life because of the values embedded in you from an early age. To break free of this, you need to start celebrating for your friends when they are kissing hot girls, being the life of the party, and overall, being happy. Some are just being themselves, others have the ability to adapt and adjust. Become one of them. You are capable of doing that. Like you, I am a very analytical and judgemental person. Some has to do with my upbringing, some is a result of my personality type. Some people are naturally outgoing, others are not. You are most likely a very creative person, because you are always thinking. This is great! And I'm sure you can create wonderful things. Now, harness the power of your mind. Put it to good use. Do something good for the world. Help other people. But, shut your mind off once in a while and just live a little. Have fun! Nothing else. Celebrate, accept, and love the accoplishments of others; soon, those accomplishments will be your own. Have a good night.