ADD

Thank you guys! It was 2 day retreat. It feels like i felt great relief and joy, then suddenly the anxiety and fear hit me back to give me hell. I feel i just needed to share this with you guys, as i feel quite lonely with no one to talk to about my meditation practice. I appriciate your support.

So could you accept someone as your partner who is far from enlightenment? Is it so that your precense will force them to wake eventually?

Well i think nofap is good guide to teach you how to get women. If you fap, you lack the desire for women. You may have your perversions for getting pussy but not the desire for loving a woman. Those are two completely different motivators. Here's a really good video to realize the difference:

leo I actually find it very helpfull staying present while doing stuff like listening professor lecturing in university and feeling my innerbody at the same time. Feels so good. I'm able to focus better that way.

Tolle said that the movie groundhogday symbolizes enlightenment quite perfectly.

I don't count the days but fuck it feels good to resist the urge to fap. So much energy and confidence. I'm not sure if i'm imagining this but it seems like my voice is deeper when i don't fap. I feel manly as fuck lmfao.

I give less fucks about how people think of me so i could say that i'm less of a people pleaser now. That doesn't mean i'm rude to people, actually i like other people way more now than before i started my journey. For money, before it used to be my number 1 priority. Now i don't care about it anymore aslong as i keep my financial stability. I think less about money, i earn less, yet still i have more money than before i started meditating etc. This is mainly because i don't waste money on stuff that empowers my ego anymore. Like sportcars etc. Those things are just minor upsides compared to the greater realizations and waking up to see my weaknesses. It's definetly not been all sunshine and lollipops. Meditation has forced me to face all the shit i've been hiding from myself before. It's all easily worth it though.

Wow. That sounds familiar. And my previous ex-gf was otherwise very emotionally mature and wise. But often when it came to self-reflection she only did it when she was victimizing herself. Usually i was to blame for everything, and eventually it made me feel guilty for her unhappiness.

You are so fucking deluded. You don't see that the problem is in you.

I've tried but it wont work unfortuanetly.

This is true, that's why it's easier to stay completely away from masturbation than masturbating once a week. Just get laid once a week and all is well.

The problem isn't tinder, it's your need to own some person as your property. If you want to control some person as your puppet and keep her in a leash then yes it's more difficult than before. I think it's good that we have more freedom, if you truly love someone you don't spend your time trying to control them or be suspicious of them cheating on you.

3 failed relationships, 3 heartbreaks, well over 50 fuckbuddies/one night stands later i found out that women aren't here to make me happy. I still love women more than ever though.

All of those are symptoms of just ordinary falling in love.

Suffering, that's where most of us get the motivation from. @Shin Just out of an interest, why do you think tinder is bad?

How?

This is true, but you can sense a bit or it. But deep down you know it's fake because you forced it. So this is way more effective when you are actually freaking out for REAL.

Hmm..I'll consider this.

For me it works when i get fearful thoughts, instead of trying to fight them i give them like inner "yes". Then i feel the ego goes confused it's like "wtf you are not supposed to accept these?" And i just sit there with calmness, smile often comes on my face.

You know those muscles you tense when you are in a rush to a toilet and holding it off not to pee in your pants? Practice to control those muscles. If you tense them correctly your dick should move slightly. Do 100 reps per day and after that try to hold the muscle tense for as long as you can for five times. Then when you are penetrating her and feel like you are about to cum, use those muscles to prevent the cum. You may still cum slightly but you will stay rock hard and are able to continue and cum again later if you so choose.

@Hardkill Wow that sucks, you are a grown ass man. You need to set boundaries for your mom. Maybe try to get some job and move out from your parents house?

Do you have any good book suggestions how to increase masculinity? I happen to have a very strong feminine side myself and i don't really know how to change it authentically?

You are making getting laid too difficult for yourself. Do you ever even talk to women? It's very easy to get laid once you get comfortable talking to women.

I don't watch Leo's videos anymore, but when i was completely unconscious and just starting my self-development his straightforward way of saying things really made me stop and see that i'm fucked up. Atm. i'm learning to love myself fully and Leo's style of teaching is not really helpful for that. I'd like some new Leo's vids about fingering girls though.

I think it's healthy if he doesn't NEED one. He didn't say he doesn't want one.