Violet

In the past year, I have made vast strides in furthering my corporate career. Originally, I was at a job where I wasn't challenged, people disliked me professionally and personally, I had a challenging almost psychotic boss, I got very little raises (which made sense) so I figured if I improve all that, I would at the very least feel less stress and anxiety. Fast forward and frankly, I have very little to complain about in my current role. I'm thriving, taking on cool projects, getting paid more, and have people supporting me. Thus, by all accounts, I expected to feel way happier but a year in, the nagging feeling about purpose is creeping back in. I'm sure there is something to my personality (constant need to improve also equals constant dissatisfaction with what is). The scary part is that I can see how I can get to new heights but I'm not sure if it will really give me the peace, fulfillment and joy that I'm looking for. There isn't any pressing urge to make decisions but I feel like I'm not necessarily moving in the right direction and that by procrastinating, I'm doing a sense of injustice to myself. Although, it's not very clear what those actions are or maybe I'm fooling myself playing mental gymnastics. Welcome your suggestions and approaches!

Maybe you are encountering your own resistances? I find the body has different ways of manifesting stress and coping mechanisms. On a spiritual level, it could be a kind of "purging". Or, you just need a break but I think if you are questioning it could mean that it is a significant sign for you.

Accepting things as they are: I find I can't seem to accept and move on. This ranges from a variety of circumstances. For example, I have a hard time accepting that my friends will make mistakes and it's futile to persuade them to see the consequences of their actions. I still harbor resentments from events long ago that has no relevance in my life despite trying multiple ways to heal them (e.g. books, psychotherapy, introspection). I feel like I have been digging at this aspect of my personality for years and I just want to make more progress than I already have. Relax: I feel like I'm always go-go-go. This seems contrary to some of the posts here saying that they find motivation difficult. I'm trying to move away from "forcing" myself to do things because even though I end up doing them, I'm not happy in the process and I'm sure my output is not as good as it could be. I feel like my goal oriented approach makes me define myself by "doing" rather than "being". So I try to pack as much as I possibly can in a day with working, learning, exercising and compromise on other areas such as mindful eating and presence with other people. I worry that if I stop being this way, I'll "fall behind" on this arbitrary timeline I have. Courage: The things I know how to do and is familiar for me, I have little resistance. This includes working out and continuous learning for my corporate career and spiritual development. The things I know I should be doing but are not doing is another story. For example, I know I can be better at planning for daily/weekly achievement, reflect on my day, practice certain visualization exercises, eat mindfully, do my physio exercises, preparing for the transition out of corporate, and on and on, but I face so much inner resistance that I just kind of throw my hands up and delay it. Then another week passes, another month, and then looking back I get really pissed. I want to get out of that cycle. Mind-body connection: Similar to "Relax", I have certain pains for years that I think are more psychosomatic in nature rather than physiological. For example, I have this knee pain that I struggle to heal despite having no injuries and seeing 20+ health care professionals. When I'm in Vipassana retreats, that area flares up along with hips, which based on my research, stores negative emotions. I'm finding more motivation and commitment to do my physio exercises which has led to some improvement. I'm curious to hear what Leo has to say about achieving better health. Thanks for starting this thread, Leo!

I think I was always pretty honest and frank before but ever since embarking on a spiritual path, I find it harder and harder to keep quiet when my friends asks me for my opinion. Someone would tell me about their relationship problems, or money problems, or general career problems, and I can't help but get so emotional. and probably aggressive, when asked for my opinion because I have been there, I care too much and my need to control for outcomes. However, most people haven't really appreciated this kind of insight and I can see how it becomes criticism in their eyes. I have gotten a general feedback that while they appreciate the insight, they don't like the fact that I pointed it out to them. I find I can tolerate less and less of behaviours in my friends such as making excuses, and complaining without action. I have inner work to do in this area but I was wondering how I can think and act differently so I have more inner peace and less riled/annoyed by these interactions? Many thanks for your input!

Given that amount, I would purchase a few Udemy courses or a month of Lynda. Or head to the book store to buy books from Leo's recommended book list ;). Or rent a car and go somewhere in nature or explore somewhere you haven't been before. Or eat a meal that is very different and you haven't tried before.

With 2017 just around the corner, I have been thinking about the process I should take in investing my resources, time, energy and money, to accomplish my goals. There is so much information and courses out there and it's not always clear to me what benefit I can derive that would further my progress. For example, reviews may not always be available, I can't always predict what behaviour I might actually be successful in adopting, and I can't always tell if it's even a worthwhile effort. To expand it more broadly, this could apply to how much I want to invest into relationships, health, career, and spirituality. How would I figure out what is most important to me and which would yield more impact in moving me forward? How do you make prioritization work for you? Thanks!