puporing

@Devin Would you be open to connecting with a therapist who may be developed enough to more fully connect with you? (Even this might take you some searching). That was one of the only ways I found outside of intimate relationships. And honestly I don't feel the need for an alternative (unless it spontaneously happened). Sometimes you just want to cut through the bullshit and talk through some things. Currently no longer in therapy but I'll still go if I really need to talk to someone face to face about a particular thing. Once you've had that depth connection it can set you free from seeking (as much).

Deepening your connection to universal intelligence . "Throw the monkey off your back and let the divine monkey enter." - Shunyamurti

Imo "life purpose" is simply the path inching you closer and closer to your "full potential". Through that process, you're also discovering who you are. And what you may think it looks like "in the end" right now could be very different from how it ends up being. But the growth have surely happened along the way and that transformation itself was the pursuit all along.

@Someone here yeah that makes sense. Just make sure you're also thinking about the kind of work that it might help you find too. Because many of those paths lead to dealing with people also.. speaking from experience .

I see.. and you have to attend university? For work? It may also be you're in a very conformist culture. Here you can get away with not mingling much.

@axiom That's very interesting... I definitely get the sense that mushrooms have a mind of its own and I have to fight it off or get past the flavors it has that can color the truth behind it. On the other hand, what is a psychedelic? Maybe you can become one .

It would be helpful to sex workers for it to be regulated, protected, as well as legalized. There're a lot "at stake" on that point to resist this: Perceived threat to existing relationships/structures. Fear of how that might change the status quo. Force people to examine how much conditionality is in their relationships. It would radically change how we think about sex and face that sometimes it is "transactional"/highly conditional. Ie we still prefer to delude ourselves in thinking that it is/should always be free from being highly conditional, yet conditional love is the dominant way people are approaching relationships right now, it's just varying in degrees.

People are good at making stories, bullshitting, projecting, creating sides, filling their mind. I completely understand why someone prefer not to be around that when you see right through it or your default is total silence. It's because you don't want to live in constructed reality. The attempting to share this with people as though you're "teaching" is almost a desperate attempt at genuine connection free from falsehood, cut through the bullshit and just relate through pure love, the "sameness", everything else is secondary.

@mr_engineer I get the point you're trying to make. It is simpler with more conscious people, coz you've transcended language and need for overstimulation/dramatization and story making. It just takes two. And I think men or women will have trouble finding someone who are very present, acting from heart/purity, are capable of connection in silence and subtle gestures. The issue is more finding such people I feel.

Lol you can throw another body count in there.

@Marten98 Love your insights. Thanks for sharing! I've thought similar... Everything is interconnected. The unconsciousness helped you move towards greater consciousness. (Also highly recommend Matt Kahn's work too for healing work like this one: https://tickets.brightstarevents.com/event/angel-academy-season14-masteringthevibrationalscale)

What have you tried? Is it true in your experience?

I adore Matt's teachings/transmissions. He's completely egoless and here to serve, a rare soul in the time we're in where much healing is needed. He has also indirectly helped me through some more difficult trips (as an anchor). His strength is in healing and holding a space of total love. I often draw from the strength of his love during difficult times (esp trips) which can flip a trip full of darkness and turn it into light if that makes sense. (Fyi, I think I've seen the video before but didn't rewatch the whole thing in this reply). I recommend his material for dealing with trauma too, he goes deep with that.

People often think there's a big difference but the way I've seen most guys approach casual sex is to treat the woman like a prostitute. And I've heard this complaint from other women too, who just feel like they're an unpaid prostitute. Pretty sad state of affairs for some of these things. So you can even argue that the girl selling sex is treated better in those kind of cases where a guy is just using her body for a time and do not care about her anymore than he would a paid sex worker. I'm probably going to offend some people, but what's the real difference between paying a therapist so someone can console/meet your emotional needs temporarily vs paying someone for sex so you can get a relief for your emotional/physical need temporarily? It's just we've made the distinction in our mind that it's "very different" but theres actually a lot of overlapping emotional dynamics at play. Those have been my thoughts but I think strange things sometimes.

Funny you're trying to tell me to socialize more . I prefer deep connection and/or complete silence and nothing in between (the in between would be loose/with "strangers" which can still be enjoyable in small amounts). Do you think deep connection is what you're missing?

If you don't have a choice. What is it that makes you recoil or depletes you? You can set some boundaries and have a looser connection with people, or embrace being a bit of a weirdo..

Probably at an early point when he naturally tried to get his caregivers attention to the pain/injury they ignored him or made him feel really bad/guilty about it. That's what happened to me and I haven't mentioned health problems to my parents for almost all my adult life now. It's nice that you're picking up that something isn't quite right..

@Devin I appreciate it. It's alright I can feel plenty of connection even over the net. Everyone you interact with for a time was/is a friend, and you (I can't help with that one).

@Devin I don't know if that's the issue or not. Isolation is inevitable with this work at current time. Maybe one day they'll make awakening part of school curriculum. Most people I tried to interact with over the years are very stuck in ego and projecting, like I mentioned before in another thread I am seen for my appearance not for what I convey and what I convey is easily dismissed if not antagonized by general population. Most people simply want to control how I live/how I think/be and box me into something they imagine is acceptable, and I don't want anything to do with this at the moment. This is not nourishing or desirable. Not to mention most people give very little if anything, they want to take alot of my time and attention but give almost none. It's really exhausting after awhile. So yeah I'm just accepting how things are when it comes to that. I have not much issue with the isolation right now.

The last 2-3 years. Got the fibromyalgia diagnosis but they don't really understand it. My gut feeling tells me it's related to my lack of will to "be here" as an ego, but who really knows.

I can't even if I wanted to these days. My body feels like it's slowly "dissolving". Like I'm barely holding onto it. Don't know what's happening to me. I feel like fainting even after a light swim. Anyway basically working smart became a necessity.

That's your clue. Sounds a bit like passion/adventure is lacking in your life currently (or whatever it is you're seeking). What are some things that would make your life awesome? (Perhaps even things that are conflicting with your current way of life, but you should consider them too if they bubble up).

This is something I've been contemplating about and I found some clarity on the subject in this video: He has also briefly shared his take on how to approach psychedelics here. (FYI The pyramids he was talking about were also discussed in channelled work RA: Law of One) "Throw the monkey off your back and let the divine monkey enter" .

I use the Aveeno Sensitive Skin SPF 50 zinc oxide one. There aren't many like this but they're out there if you search mineral sunscreen or zinc oxide. (Titanium Dioxide is the other mineral one). The idea is to get as much coverage as possible but is something you'll actually use/not react negative against (eg, some folks with darker skins don't like mineral sunscreen because of the white cast). And also taking environmental considerations into account.

^Thanks for the shares : ) There are too many for me to list but here's one that's kind of unique/reminded me of sharing: It just seemed so "simple" yet communicated incredible emotional depth (lyrics in the description). And this one