Infinitesimal

I apologize for my misunderstanding. I really enjoyed the video, thank you. Not my will will, but the hearts will be done. I'll try that as my mantra going forward to see how it works out. "practicing acceptance can still be a way to lessen the ego." Is a very concise version of what I was attempting to get across I believe, or at least it is how I view things now. Thank you for the improvement!

Is removing the control of the ego not an improvement in ones life? Is self change or self improvement impossible? Why?

That's an amazing point. I hadn't thought of it that way. I appreciate you improving me. Does it follow then, logically, that acceptance and unacceptance are both constructs of the ego in the first place? Since there can be no "me" to accept or not. What is the way?

His point of attaching reward centers to the brain to existing had me taken for a moment. Then I remembered enlightenment work is painful.

Acceptance can be a way of life and a thought pattern, but even in that state, true acceptance of the full nature of reality remains impossible for an ego, but the whole point is that the ego can adopt the former to allow the latter to appear in the egos place. Am I wrong? Your comment is somewhat confusing to understand your stance on the idea.

Of course, absolute infinity is far and away much more grandiose and greater and etc than "infinity" as the ego can imagine it. If nothing else it makes sense poetically that an imagined infinity can assist an imagined ego to disillusion itself enough for absolute infinity to shine through to the awareness experiencing the ego.

I disagree. I was thinking of infinity in the context of infinite options. As an ego with illusions of free will, you must accept that you have infinite options available to you if you do in fact have the ability to choose. This being the case, you have the choice of ANYTHING that will improve your existence. Ironically in this case the improvement of existence will kill the ego, but as a higher form you can allow your ego to die happily, and as an ego you can die happily knowing your "true" self will be happier without you. Infinite choices leads to infinite openness in your mindstate, and you can accept your defeat and death more readily. That's my argument at least.

I think that fully not moving at all is the best for you, since through meditation you are trying to shed the existence of your physical body and the ego attached to it to become aware of your inner self. The outer self should be ignored until the timer dings.

The ego cannot comprehend true infinity, but we can see the course it takes in other egos, and can attempt to emulate them. We can logically deny ourselves that power that the ego believes it holds. Think of the true one universal infinite self. All we must do, as egos, is allow our minds to freely move without us attempting to clutter it all up with the monkey mind etc. So all we must do, is become more like infinity. To become like infinity we must open ourselves up to more options in our finite world, as egos we can only exist in a finite world, so we must accept everything in it, without exception. Once we have acceptably released our desires as an ego, but accepting the reality of all things we can see, we can truly see the futility of our egos existence, and can shed that shell. This process is meant to make the ego more easily shed, since it will be on the same side of the war against itself, if that makes sense. I've been attempting to follow this way of being for a few months now, and it is working great for me. Whenever I have any serious issues, I look to "infinity" and decide what is best to do from that point of view. Usually it is to stop all higher ego function and relax, then the body can take over naturally. What are your thoughts on using this strategy to help you in your life? Is it all crazy? is there a huge flaw in this plan that I am missing? Or is it halfway worthwhile?

I would say happiness is the carrot on the end of the stick that pulls us through the meanings we create. If we can change ourselves, we can change what makes us happy, and therefore we can obtain happiness doing whatever we want to do.

I realize now that I became "enlightened" or "aware" at a very young age, but I did not understand what it was at the time. Because of mental illness and subsequent therapy and repression and denial and etc... I was aware at a young age that there was an infinity that was me. I mistakenly labeled it my own insanity, and began my duality with ease. I played the ego spectacularly, directed by my insanity and the "true me" inside my brain. Which of course was an ego in it's own right, so none of this matters... right? When I was 23 I had a trip on acid which resulted in my ego attempting to process the infinite consciousness. I saw level after level of higher and higher beings with higher awareness up to the point where I literally couldn't handle it. My brain overloaded and all the high level consciousnesses decided to go back to sleep so the body would survive, meanwhile I was trying my hardest just to relax. After this experience I was born anew as a fresh consciousness with no labels or patterns or anything, I was aware of the ego I had and understood I would continue to play that part for the ease of my life. I relearned what my values were and became a new person. A few years after that, having seen Leo's first infinity video where he describes his own trip, I had another trip where I was able to understand that those higher levels of consciousness I had experienced were simply infinity without need for containment or creation of higher understanding beings or egos to simply exist. The egos do nothing for it. The distrust of ego I got from this experience has made some aspects of enlightenment work come to me somewhat easily, but I understand I have far to go. If anyone has any advice for me I am happy to hear it. Especially you Leo. Much Love, Infinitesimal