Life

@andyjohnsonman I am still curios, did your really take 50mg Vitamin D or just 50mcg? I wouldn't consider 50mcg a mega dose, but with 50mg we are surely approaching real dangerous territory.

Also be mindful at the units of your blood test. ng/ml is the most typical one but a unit using mol e.g. nmol/l isn't that unusual either. some examples: 20ng/ml = 50nmol/l 20nmol/l = 8ng/ml 80.9 ng/ml = 202.25nmol/l

I noticed that some of you mixed-up the units (mg vs. mcg) pretty harshly. @andyjohnsonman if you really took 50mg Vit D that would be 2,000,000 IU. Around Nov19-Feb20 I took 12,000 IU Vit D daily (+K2 and some other supplements). In February my D3 level in my blood has been 80.9 ng/ml - which is pretty high but still far away from a toxic level.

@Leo Gura I think your advice is very practical in order to have success (in the stage Orange style). But I have the feeling, that some of your advice in this thread is partly in contradiction to the advice you give in and I am especially confused about the "No serious talk until you sleep with her at least half a dozen times" part, because this advices to withhold some potential critical information for a rather long time. After some intense sexual adventures the woman may have fallen in love with a fake persona but not the more authentic person. Am I getting something wrong? Probably stage orange pickup - even the version you criticize in your rant - is totally legitimate and of high value if you are at a low development stage regarding success with women (like being an involuntary virgin).

I have a hard time channeling my sexual desire, I do a lot of masturbation - fortunately not so much with porn, but thinking of past sexual experiences or thinking about girls in high heels. Do you have any advice on how to do the channeling?

I am wondering lately whether it's a good idea to invest some time an emotional labour into pick up. Some background: My main pick up phase was between 2014-2015 (24-25 years old). I started off as a rather hard case (virgin and no kiss until 23, rather unsocial, nerdy and very logical guy). My first pick up phase gave me huge personal growth and I progressed from a terrible shy level to okish level. My main motivation had been overcoming the emotional pain of never having a girlfriend and on the positive side crazy sex experiences and experiencing intimacy. After having Sex with around 6 new girls I entered my first relationship in end of 2015. I enjoy the first weeks extremely but soon realized that she is not my dream girl (especially in terms of looks, she was cute and the sex was great, but I saw girls which turned me on much more frequently and I felt that I am betraying myself somehow). I broke up with her after a year and some days in end of 2016 - my emotional reaction to the anniversary showed me brutally that I had to do this step. After that I tried to approach new girls here and there but I never got back my old momentum. Up to now I just had sex with 2 new girls (+2 hookers and 1 gay guy from tinder because despite my fears I am curious of extreme experiments). In the phases I tried to gain momentum I gave up very soon and the same pattern repeated multiple times: I can date girls which I am very attracted to (hotter than my ex girlfriend) but as soon as I kiss them things get awkward and I am out. This along with the other frustrations (e.g. getting flakes) costs a lot of mental capital for me and I give up to pursue pick up until after some time of forgetting these frustrations a new cycle begins. I also have the feeling that my motivation in 2014-2015 was much greater, I feel that I had "much less to loose" and also hold the believe that an intimate relationship would be the holy grail and the missing piece to my live, soon in the relationship I was disillusioned about that. Right now I am wondering wether I should start a new cycle but I fear to fail again and to waste a lot of mental capital: being frustrated about missed approach opportunities, failed dates, flakes, rejection, anticipating massive approach anxiety, thinking about what happens if colleagues from work see me approaching, dating woman with dangerous friends (e.g. ex hookers - which I would find sexually extremely interesting). Though I am on a good track with my career too much distraction wouldn't be great. Should I outgrow pickup by doing it again and obtaining the levels I feel to miss (having sex with the girls I am extremely attracted to, and playing out more my fetish for high heels) or should I do it somehow else?

@kyle barnett Could you clarify a bit on that? Up to now I did't come across Leo telling not to show actualized.org videos to ones girlfriend. On the other hand I have the impression that many of the personal development concepts teached at actualized.org are targeted to men and if a woman would apply them one-to-one she would loose parts of her femininity.

Thank you for your opinions. I might overthink it, but it is such a huge turn on for me, that I get frustrated if "my" girl is not into wearing high heels. This might be also partly (maybe 10-30%) a reason why I broke up with my girlfriend recently -- for my rational mind this seems not to be healthy.

@clytaemnestra I wrote that wearing heels implies confidence. From that you can not infer the opposite direction, that wearing no high heels implies no confidence. I made no claim about this direction

Hi everyone, throughout my youth up to now (I am 26 years old) I feel an extremely strong attraction for girls who wear high heels especially during every day life. I am not sure how to deal with that and what the root issues of this kind of fetish are, though I have some initial ideas: I as a very logical and practical man have a hard time to understand why a women would wear high heels in every day life, especially if the heel exceeds a certain height, but on the other hand this irrational behavior is exactly what excites me and triggers extremely strong sexual fantasies. I also associate with this behavior some provocation (especially in the case of overknee boots) and high confidence -- a girl with low confidence would not choose these kind of shoes. So here a root issue might be that I am a natural introvert who often lacks to express himself freely, so sexual fantasies with a girl who does not lack this expressiveness might be a short cut solution for my own lack of expressiveness. I would be very thankful for some comments on my ideas. I would also appreciate some tips how to deal with my desires: Should I approach more girls who wear high heels? And should I tell them that I especially recognized them because of their shoes? I would feel a bit creepy and superficial (even if I don't say anything about their shoes) -- I am not yet comfortable with my fetish, although I tell all girls I slept with about it. Unfortunately none of them was really this high heel type of girl Best wishes!