Ajax

In my opinion you should seek an actualized life. It is nearly impossible to commit 100% to enlightenment. There is just too much going on in the world and if you have even the slightest attachment to the material world and you pursue enlightenment, those attachments will hold you back for many years and you will waste so much time. So enlightenment should only be pursued if you really, really want to do it. If you are divided, don't do it because unless you are willing to take very drastic measures, you won't attain enlightenment for a very, very long time and the road will be unnecessarily challenging.

You're progressing just fine. If you recall Leo's description of the 4 stages in his victim video, you will remember that the 2nd stage is the fighter stage. The next stage is the creator stage, so just focus on that one. Keep meditating, reading, thinking, practicing and whatever else you do...you will graduate soon enough. In the meantime, appreciate the accomplishments that come with overcoming the victim stage.

Here is a basic fact about humanity: They like what they understand and they don't like what they don't understand. The reason they don't understand is because they have certain fixed viewpoints and limiting beliefs about something. Now these things are only resolved by self realization and trying to talk about it or explain something will be pointless. It a "teacup is overflowing" kinda deal. Course you gotta realize you can't empty their teacup for them. Therefore, if it bothers you... don't bother trying to explain. Just use the only weapon against misunderstanding that you can, Communication. Of course you know communication is sending and receiving. If you are sending communication sufficiently, then the problem is on the receiving end. Therefore any attempts that you try to communicate should be directed toward discovering the obstructions at the receiving end. This means that instead of talking, you must practice listening. You should be asking probing questions, asking for more details, better explanations, seek clarification, etc... This will accomplish several things. First, it will allow you to see the obstructions for what they are. Therefore you will see that they are based on assumptions. Therefore you won't take their stabs at you so personally. Secondly, it will force them to question their reality and therefore will possible open their mind to new possibilities or at least make them more self conscious about even bringing up the subject with you because they don't want to face the fear about questioning their own reality. You see the reason they are doing this is not because they are malicious... It is because they have this stable reality about life that they constructed by their considerations(fixed viewpoints). It is a false reality and deep down they know it. Therefore, they live in fear that if the truth was revealed, their fragile world would blow apart into a million pieces.(it might be a good idea to rewatch leo's video about lies). Since you know that they are living in fear, you should realize that the things that they do are out of fear. Things done out of fear are not sane, they are insane. Therefore from this angle you should understand that they are acting out of insanity. Reacting to insanity is not a sane thing to do. Hopefully this has helped, my friend

Yes, there are multiple paths that eventually converge at "Truth". I have chosen a path that is considerably different. The basic problem is the same on both ends. The distortion of perception. This distortion is what is preventing us from seeing more truth and becoming free. Let's call this distortion "falseness" Therefore the goal of both of these paths should be eliminating falseness. To the degree that your thoughts and activities depart from this goal, you are off the track. There is a specific thought process that can be used to tackle this problem, but I won't share it because I will not violate the guidelines of this forum and promote a product. You may contact me, privately, if that is your wish.

The mind distortion video is by far my favorite. I recommend that you keep trying to understand it. Here are two videos that really like:

UH, No..they..don't You don't need money to believe in yourself, you don't need any money to exercise and little money to eat decent food, you don't need money to talk to people and you have access to more information and answers than even the greatest geniuses before the 21st century and you are telling me you can't find your life purpose. Life purpose is something from within a self expression, you don't necessarily need money to discover it. You may need money to pursue it but not to discover it. I will repeat a trite old platitude: Excuses are like assholes, everybody has one and they all stink!

@Tomek To have and eat a cookie, one must be willing to make sacrifices that they might not want to make. For instance, you may need to give up capital, to find someone who can take care of your affairs. Additionally, you may find someone in the big city that may be willing and desire a smaller life. Or, you may find a business student who has finished their studies that might want to take a break before they enter the "real world" and managing their business could be an opportunity to manage your business. There are many, many solutions.. Additionally, do you have a plan to create some sort of business in the big city? Or are you so focused on keeping your passive income that you haven't the energy to start creating something new? If you could discover a great opportunity you could find a way to make money doing something you enjoy on a grander scale so that you can drop your previous opportunity. This a " trading your cookie for a better cookie" approach. This may take challenge and sacrifice but if one focuses on the end result, they should be happy. I would have been in a similar situation that you were in, but fortunately. My mother, who taught me everything I knew about business... was happy to take care of my business for me while I lived in the big city. I then created several different opportunities for myself in the big city so everything ran smoothly for me. I had to make sacrifices at first, for instance I lived in a house with many people renting, but the rent was only about 200USD total. I may have skipped a meal or two a few times ... but in the end, it was worth it because I got what I want. I think the secret is having a long-sighted vision.

Thank you, @cly your kind words are most touching. I have learned that one should not only learn from their experiences and try not to repeat them but they must actually look even deeper for hidden truths. It is actually these truths that subtract or add quality to your life and many of your experiences are actually repeats from lessons learned or not learned from these very subtle but powerful truths that are hidden from view. That is how you shave years off of your experience. I wish so much love and blessings your way, cly... take care.

I was thinking of ways to explain paradox a bit more to you, I was tired yesterday and so I don't think I explained it as well as I could have. Imagine holding a ball in the air that is half-blue and half-red. There are there is Joe to the left and there is Sally to the right. You ask, "What color is this ball." Joe say, "red", Sally says "blue". So who is right? To them there is a paradox, because it looks red to Joe and it looks Blue to Sally. Since you see both sides of the ball... it is not a paradox to you because you see the colors and where they fit. Just like the ball, Life has many multi-colored multi-aspect facets to it that change just by perspective. If you can understand what I am telling you then, you understand paradox. Life is not uni-dimensional it has so many dimensions and aspects that only a narrow mind would be could say that it is either one way or the other... See now why Leo is so critical of Rationalism? For your paradox of fixing flaws/accepting them... It is good to view things in this way: Some flaws can not be changed, some flaws are not actually flaws themselves, some flaws are actually advantages in disguise, some flaws require other flaws to be addressed before they can be taken care of, etc.... You see when you look around and try to view the various aspects and view it from different viewpoints, it doesn't quite seem so much like a paradox anymore, does it? I hope that makes some sense to you, vin

@Vinsanity Watch the first 5 minutes of the paradox again. Basically, if something isn't working... adapt and work around it. Try something else and then try again later just like a puzzle. For example, if you are not funny, don't try to force it, work on an aspect that you are better at to compensate such as telling interesting stories or otherwise being a good conversationalist or being a good listener and giving wise advice.

I have known people like you who feel the don't deserve something or someone. It is usually because the have wronged some people and did things the are not proud of. Here is a truth to live by: "when you deny your conscience, you deny your self" Your conscience is not something you have it is you. When you do wrong, you hurt more than others, you hurt yourself, more specifically you crush your ability to be happy and your ability to believe in yourself. First thing first, you must admit that you robbed yourself of your happiness. Then you must develop a high level of integrity which mean you have to create a code of honor that is good and decent and stick to it. You must also nurture your ability to dream and have a vision that you are willing to follow. Finally, knowing that your happiness is determined by your actions directed toward yourself and others, not by what you have or what has happened to you. If you can keep these things with you, I imagine you will be just as fine. Good luck my friend.

Yes, I agree with the two above me. You don't want to be a yo-yo going up and down. Cut the string. Or you will continue to feel the pain and uncertainty. Uncertainty will make you go insane... you need to separate and heal or you won't get better...you will get worse.

actualized1: Assumptions are the devil. You haven't the slightest clue what enlightenment actually is. It doesn't make sense to make up ideas about something you know nothing about. What kind of crazy conclusions can we come up with if we have incomplete/incorrect data about something? How about the world being flat? How about the sun travels around the earth? Even worse, what about the incalculable superstitions that were/are running amuck around this wobbly planet? Real discoveries are made by people who disregard potential ignorance and are not afraid to explore and venture into the unknown despite what may happen. Are you one of those, or not?

Just like Extreme27 said... I shall also part with a poem from mother goose: For every ailment under the sun There is a remedy, or there is none; If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it.

By The foundation of science is to be totally unbiased... of course the more that it knows, the harder it is to do so. The idea was to have complete and accurate observations so that it may make inferences from those observations. However, when models are made... many observations fall short of is original goal. Let me introduce you to a quotation by Thomas Edison: "At the time I experimented on the incandescent lamp I did not understand Ohm's Law. Moreover, I do not want to understand Ohm's Law. It would prevent me from experimenting." My point is the easier you can disregard the theory that the brain is the source of thought, the easier it is to consider new ideas. Try this: Ask yourself, " How exactly does the brain think a thought?" Do you know? Does anybody know? If you have an answer keep asking why and how until you get to the answer "I don't know". Then you realize that since you don't know, it might not be wise to be clutching to an answer that you don't know. Socratize yourself! So that you can open you mind to new possibilities... To answer your question simply and directly: Watch leo's videos on enlightenment in sequence and do the exercises that he tells you. Pay full attention and try not to miss a thing. That will be time consuming but it will be the best way to at least attempt to experience it. He gives pretty specific directions.

Borrow some thoughts from Einstein: "Any intelligent fool can make things bigger and more complex .... It takes a touch of genius -- and a lot of courage -- to move in the opposite direction." And: "When the solution is simple, God is answering." Explain it as simple as you can, in a few sentence or less... preferably 1 sentence. Then write any modifications that you may need to do to clarify the statement. Put it together and simplify it the best you can. Good Luck

I will let Albert Einstein answer: “If most of us are ashamed of shabby clothes and shoddy furniture let us be more ashamed of shabby ideas and shoddy philosophies.... It would be a sad situation if the wrapper were better than the meat wrapped inside it.” Personally, I want a woman I can trust... a person I can totally be myself around so that I don't have to withhold aspects of my personality. Someone who is kind, accepting, and maintains a high integrity who is open-minded and values wisdom and virtues. Such a person will make the quality of your life better and make you happy. If hotness is your major qualification... then make sure you don't fall in love or your just asking for heart-break.

First thing I think about when I get up... it is either: "I gotta pee.." or " Why the hell does someone always have to be in the bathroom when I gotta pee!" Actually I think you are missing out on the beauty in the fact that life has no purpose... Imagine life as an empty canvas and you as a painter. With a vision in mind you can use certain techniques and strokes to paint a picture for yourself and others to enjoy. The secret is in realizing that Life is suppose to be fun! The idea that you should buy into is that you are simply an artist that is there to create whatever it is that you wish to create. If you are not having fun in life it is simply because are not creating your own design or you are not using the proper techniques to align your creation with your vision/purpose. Take care, My friend.

http://www.actualized.org/blueprint Good Luck my friend.

I see a limiting belief! In the course, Leo said quite a bit about limiting beliefs, fears, negative values, etc... I would recommend that you review them a few times. No one can do that for you. The best tips we could offer would be coping strategies but it could not undo that limiting belief.

Leo explained it quite well: people are not actualized. The answer is simple enough but there is much more to it than meets the eye... it is the Master Key: "Allowing another to be themselves without insisting that they change to become or continue to become acceptable." If this rule is sufficiently observed it will hold needy-perception at bay. To answer in one sentence: One should strive to achieve the highest ethical/moral standard and look for it in others while maintaining the superior value of Non-judgementalness in heart and mind at all times, ensuring that your partner at least has that value as well.

Live with the Golden Rule: If you wouldn't want someone to do that to you, then don't do that thing to someone else. What if she was in a relationship with you and became interested in someone else? I imagine it would be heartbreaking if she decided to cheat on you instead of breaking up with you. If she decided to leave her boyfriend for you, that would reveal a flaw in her character. Just something to consider...

That is totally true, the reason that you can't do it is because you believe one or more things about the situation that are not true. When you believe in something that is false, your misunderstanding and misconceptions cause you pain. Consider this, you are not the only one who had your problem, there are many others that not only solved it but conquered it but... but you with your limited experiences, viewpoints and considerations are a slave to it because you are so stuck in the middle of it that you can not see alternative paths that are readily available. Take me for instant, my wife recently got pregnant with another man... such a thing would spiral most people into a state of anger, confusion, pain and even wrath... however the second I found out I smiled, kissed my wife on the cheek and told her that it was over. The next day, I booked a plane ticket and went back home to live near my parents. I realized that I needed to make some changes in my life. I took Leo's life course and finished it under a week. I was fortunate enough to easily find my life purpose and have been fervently working on it consistently... and I feel so much more peace, happiness and liberation than I have ever ever done. I even have been speaking to my wife lately and advising her and comforting her when she feels down.. This has all happened in this month of April, 2016 BTW... Therefore I know you are encountering problems@Mary because you are suffering from a distorted reality. ***Edit*** I see that you wrote something while I was making a post so I am adding this bit, Mary... Well the truth is that it is an assumption if you lose a year. If you fail, then that is an opportunity to gain an extra year of experience if you think about it like that. If you work extremely hard then you would definitely have an advantage the following year. What is a year? It is nothing in the big picture of thing... it is your impulsiveness and impatience that is causing you distress... a distortion a false reality.

Well, it really depends on how much time we spend here and how much time we spend making shit happen!

@zasa joey The answer is simple enough, but a challenge to implement. You have way too many barriers in your life that are bringing you down. If you have access to knowledge to remove those obstacles... And you should as you have the internet that has the answers to just about any problem... The problem lies with you. Specifically your level of Ethics. We can get into a great theoretical conversation about ethics, however I am going to use a simple and practical definition that I use daily. "Ethics is the actions that you use to align yourself with your top values." So then, we have a very specific outline about what to do. First identify your top values and perform daily actions to align yourself with them. That way, you are moving yourself up in the world. The more you do this, the better you will feel about life. If this is not working, it is because you are 6either not taking meaningful action or the values you chosen are not high quality enough. Here are my Top 10 Values. 1. Personal Growth 2. Ethics 3. Truth 4. Attitude 5. Drive 6. Health 7. Communication 8. Freedom 9. Creativity 10. Contribution Bonus value: Recognize and eliminate limiting beliefs. I have the values listed on the wall, on my desk and other places to ensure that I am constantly review it. Then, I form a check-list everyday that include very specific tasks that aid in my development in these 10 values. The stronger I am in these values, the better that I feel. So the main idea here is to continually reassess your ethics and if you are still confused it is only two reasons: 1. Your lack of action. 2. Your limiting beliefs. So now we know what the problem is, you must decide what you are going to do about it.