avk123

I see a huge loop here lol

Good point

Hmm it seems that meditation is not really good or bad in itself, nor is the person acting upon it. If you want to get drunk you drink, if you want to feel hunger you starve, if you want to feel at rest you sleep, If you want to feel something you do something, If you want to feel less tense you meditate. it has no significant meaning in itself or in the person acting upon it. Think of paradoxes We are only chasing the feeling it gives us.

Good day fam, I have been raised by my parents to be a minimalism person, however I dont really see the pleasures that come it as when I enter into materialistic societies I see that the rate of pleasure so much higher in being materialistic. Now from my own personal knowledge, I know that everything has a cost (or so I think) and thus being minimalist is basically the best way to life a "healthy" life but really is it ?

I lost the same amount of weight in order to be "attractive". Whats ironic is that after losing weight I got criticized for losing muscle weight as well so I had few people suggest that I build muscle, I went into that and on my training I injured myself and could not continue exercising for months, I felt really depressed, why ? because I related my value in the way I look to other people or to the social norm, you know what, even to myself... I went to countless hospitals, physiotherapists, MRI procedures, another bunch of doctors and on and on for the sake of training and building a persona plus looks for myself Now that my injuries have partially healed and I continued training I try not to connect the way I look or my weight on the scale to my own value, because values go up and come down, and eventually they dont really exist, but its hard always reminding yourself that especially with the ego boost you get because your "fit" or because how much you have accomplished. I recently researched man shaming topics and how men are shamed for not having a killer six pack, or looks like this or that, but if you notice major characters in history who were portrayed as leaders and value worthy people they portrayed what looks good and not according to the way they personally look. Anyway, yes we can accomplish so much on the outside and the inside is still the same, we think that we are broken and we think that we need to "fix" something, only so that in the end you realise, there is and there isnt something to fix. Im still struggling with the issue because im deeply and sincerely looking for approval and love, and looking good is my only way to attain it. So its hard for me (Living in a very materialistic community)

Im not going to give you advice, we are all facing crap on our own and we are not professionals. Best I can advice is seek a professional counselor if you are really serious about the relationships you have in your life. It can be a therapist who can help guide yourself to what you really want. Best of luck,

Speaking frankly, Im a collector of video games and action figures, and everytime I leave my premesis I always feel "scared" I would come back and find them stolen / damaged / taken away etc... Yes the more materials you have the more attachment you have, and the less you have the more mundane you become to yourself. I guess you have to find the equilibrium between having and letting go. For each person its different.

Hmm, I kind of relate to that, after opening the door of emotions in my life I became a women on the inside in some aspects, I look after myself more often, I speak more tenderly to people, I feel situations differently, It becomes easier to relate.

Nobody has the answer, not for ourselves and not for you diffidently. However, statistics have shown that vulnerability is a major factor in living a sturdy well being life. The rest is up to you OP.

Well the point of this thread is not to turn it into some sort of dating Q & A , my focus would be to question and discuss without projecting shit into it. Anyway, im going to further discuss the notion of the "badboy" that is honestly affecting our minds, we usually look at the notion of the "badboy" as the ultimate notion to attain sex and love. But honestly what are looking for behind these words ? why am I on a self actualization form discuss these issues with a bunch of strangers who again I never met or dont know what they experienced ? I honestly start to think that the notion of what the "alpha" man should be is an imagination that affects both men and women alike...

Whats ironic that nost most of the points you mentioned are subjective - I can be a nerd and do all of those things yet someone women will still see me as a "nice guy" I honestly think it all boils down to perception and thoughts - kind of like music - not everyone likes the same music we all view music genres differently but we all love music.

Good day fam, So I started watching the Walking dead for the first time yesterday, and I'm really finding it fascinating, it isn't really about the zombie parts that fascinate me, its the whole deconstruction of society that happens when things change. First of all please DONT post any spoilers in this thread and focus on the perspective behind the fictional story. What I noticed is that people change when social constructions are removed, your mail delivery guy can turn into a savage alpha leader for a gang with no sort of ethical repercussions, the person convicted of murder or rape can turn out to be a decent man with ethics. It really just narrows down to how illusion social constructs are, not to mention how we take everything today for granted, our food, shelter, relationships. The whole idea of individuality starts to break down and you notice how there is no "Who I am" there is only what is happening. Its quite eye opening.

I understand, However given that Morality is really an illusory concept, it is hard and effort taking to battle the majority of the world on a concept. I personally struggle to keep reminding people that concepts such as patriotism , beauty. religion, and other aspects dont exist. I understand that for many of them its a way of survival, but the problem occurs really when they frame of the world starts to break through yours. I see the world of thoughts and thoughts and frame of frames being thrown from different individuals upon the next, and people with similar views end up being what we refer to as friends. Take this forum for example, it basically lays out the external of what we can define as reality as it is, however if your going to enter a political forum or a religious forum, most of the information being posted is considered irrelevant, not to say that which is right and wrong, its just a situation of the matter, and each viewer is trying to perceive what in his mind gives him the best levels of happiness and survival. I really who wonder, who the fuck framed us in such a dysfunctional way ? who made us feel pain and fear ? I know its a question that may never be answered but I think it is a question that would help, who do we blame for making us feel both sadness and happiness ? who is out there ? if there is such a concept, please give me the answer what is out there ? speak to me lol

I am still on the second season starting now, Well I realize that alot of the actions and reactions of the individuals portrayed in the series are a projection of the writers of the story, however it still projects an immersive thought reaction to "what would people do" given the scenario of survival. It really just fascinates me that ethics and morality are absolutely subjective, it depends on what given scenario at what given situation sort of to speak. What Im trying to critisize here is the whole concept of absolute morality that has no factual basis, example, in today's world of social media, give the huge intersection between different cultures of thinking, we get alot and alot of perception on a single given scenario, if for example I post a picture of a puppy with his head cut off, you would find alot of reaction going haywire, however ofcourse it all depends given the situation. Maybe im facing my own sort of inner struggle here, and I really appreciate the fact that im being so vulnerable about posting online to a group of strangers I never met, but I realize that there is no really a solid white or black in this world. Ugh, anyway I guess im justing ranting my own inner projection on this thread now, so let me go back to the top. People would do anything to survive, and it seems ethics are just there to comfort both parties heading in the same direction of perception of survival.

Again dont focus on the zombie and the action scenes. Focus instead of how the character's self identification and persona change, how ethics and things we see day to day infront us in the social paradigm dont actually exist. Its quite fascinating

Well relatively speaking, I have started my own group via an app called meetup called "Socrates Cafe" where we discuss very intellectual topics ranging from death,social construct, economy, and dating. However what I find dissatisfying and Sadly that in my area is that most of the incoming members age between 40 and above. for me,luckily I got to make a friend or two out of this initiation. If you have more ideas of things you are referring to please give me a reference to where can I get a better understanding.

How ?

Find a professional counselor in your area.

I see that this thread is going very wide in terms of the information being provided, so I hope we can stay in track here. Are women looking for men with big egos? Any of you have sisters and mothers ? have you tried asking them that question ?

You know whats ironic, be it 15 years old or 35 years old (my age) You will always find something that is bursting your shell of peace in life, embrace imperfection, enjoy what you can. If you have certain goals you want to achieve, work on this step by step. There is no race, the only race you have is with yourself only. Start from the inside first (by meditating) and then work on the outside (being vulnerable and exposed to different experiences) is what I tell myself, maybe it wont work for you, but im just passing by with me advice.

Personally speaking, whenever im feeling grateful .., it means I have achieved happiness. That's it for me.

What if you wake up late in the morning and you have to do something urgently ? Do you cast out meditation ?

People have hard time liking their own self - you think it will be easy for them to like you ? Once you realize that all people suffer from: Sadness, Anger, Jealousy, Envy, Shame, lack of confidence, fear, disgust. It will open your eyes that everyone you see is on the same level as you, everyone is lacking inside themselves. There is no Mr. or Mrs. Perfect. in this world. So whatever frame of life (Way of life) you choose to be, nobody can judge you on it and critisize you except your own self, which is the toughest. If your a teenager, you out to know that teenagers are the most lost people in terms of self awareness they are trying to find an identity to be loved and accepted, the mind hasn't matured to a level of self recognition so as a teenager you try to hold on to a concept that gives you that social self worth and acceptance. Its biology in the end.

I personally don't think about belief or none belief, Everyone on this forum goes through different experiences and emotions in their life, your brain is wired to love/hate - believe/disbelieve whatever it can in order to continue its existence as long as possible whether through reaffirmations, meditations, self awareness ...etc

Wrong ? Right ? Let it be - don't let it be To OP, Just live we are all together facing our inner gremlins, we tremble , we fall, we cry. I hope you find what your looking for in whatever cave your path is leading.