SmartFixer_OceanJjb

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Everything posted by SmartFixer_OceanJjb

  1. I Feel That I'm Lost. My Age's 40+.

    SmartFixer_OceanJjb replied to SmartFixer_OceanJjb's topic in Mental Health, Serious Emotional Issues

    @Ann Brown I thank you for sharing your experience. That's right; car accident can happen . . . Life . . .

  2. I Feel That I'm Lost. My Age's 40+.

    SmartFixer_OceanJjb replied to SmartFixer_OceanJjb's topic in Mental Health, Serious Emotional Issues

    @Ayla I've been wanting to let it go. I searched "sedona practice to relieve old patterns" in YouTube but didn't quite hit the right videos. Could you show me which one?

  3. I Feel That I'm Lost. My Age's 40+.

    SmartFixer_OceanJjb replied to SmartFixer_OceanJjb's topic in Mental Health, Serious Emotional Issues

    thank you for telling me that my stories are sloppy. I understood now. Another thing is that, this "getting old" stories are not accepted in younger people. The 'sense' dont quite come real to them, which I understand. I need to look for some space where I feel comfortable writing my stories and concerns. I thank you for your honest comments.

  4. I Feel That I'm Lost. My Age's 40+.

    SmartFixer_OceanJjb replied to SmartFixer_OceanJjb's topic in Mental Health, Serious Emotional Issues

    @abrakamowse Yup we are wiser, muhahaha . . . . Actually nope. I aint wise. If I were wise, I would know what's right thing to do and I must be doing it. But I don't. I'm confused & lost with this old age. Therefore, I'm not wise. I'm dumb. I got to start from knowing myself & being brutally honest to myself. <-- I got this right, I guess. Thanks for your reply tho.

  5. I Feel That I'm Lost. My Age's 40+.

    SmartFixer_OceanJjb replied to SmartFixer_OceanJjb's topic in Mental Health, Serious Emotional Issues

    !!!!!! "You should genuinely feel like you can go on, not just saying you must go on." <-- This is Darn Hard for me!! The "grateful journal" thing . . I've been doing it for 2+ weeks and . . . I don't know . . . I think I got a little tired of it, but better stick to it. Yes I will re-start today. I don't know my "happiness" factor. I really don't know. Yes I have a roof when rained. I got food in fridge. I got 1st world problem. Do you know your "happiness factor"? . . . if you don't mind. Thanks for your reply.

  6. I Feel That I'm Lost. My Age's 40+.

    SmartFixer_OceanJjb replied to SmartFixer_OceanJjb's topic in Mental Health, Serious Emotional Issues

    @Argue You are right --> I got to stop negative self-talk. I understand it logically, but psychologically I'm somewhat conditioned to it due to my upbringing -- I'd been depressed growing up. That's why the character will come with me all the way to my death. That's what I understood talking to my counselor. So I Reeeally try to change my psyche. I need to Really work on it. I got a journal to write: today's victories, what I learned today, how I loved myself today, how I love/give today, what I was grateful for, etc... I've been doing it for 2+ weeks and . . I guess I got tired. oh no . . Yup I got audiobook for some of books . . which cost $$. Thank you for your reminder! I just keep playing it then. I thank you for your effort writing the reply. Sincerely.

  7. I Feel That I'm Lost. My Age's 40+.

    SmartFixer_OceanJjb replied to SmartFixer_OceanJjb's topic in Mental Health, Serious Emotional Issues

    @abrakamowse I thank you for trying to make me feel better. You must be a nice person. However . . I don't know . . anyway we are waaay older than most of people here. I accept the fact as-is. muhahahaha.

  8. I Feel That I'm Lost. My Age's 40+.

    SmartFixer_OceanJjb replied to SmartFixer_OceanJjb's topic in Mental Health, Serious Emotional Issues

    @Ayla When I was just 40, I was fine, busy working. You got panic attack . . . That's hard. Thanks for sharing your background. Yes I trust you. I got to be mindful -- Need to be present. I understand. But my husband will die sooner than me. Due to my job (I'm not going to specify here), I know how people decline. I just saw too many. It's a loooong exhausting process for care-giver. I have no kids, no family. I'm introvert. Expecting the days that I got to take care of husband . . expecting that I'll be dying by myself . . Those days are coming for sure. Just expecting those gloomy days don't get me any solution. But if I don't think about it and if those days came suddenly, I'll be depressed Real bad. So I guess, now, I'm training my psyche for coming gloomy days. And get depressed. Sounds pretty stupid of me. So, at least, I better save some money. Then, I should get a job. But the motivation is very weak: I need to get a job to prepare for coming gloomy days. I need to be happy at this moment. <-- I understand logically, but psychologically? spiritually? I can't get the stage yet. I need some reset button in my psyche. Sorry for my another long sloppy English. Again, thank you for your comment.

  9. I Feel That I'm Lost. My Age's 40+.

    SmartFixer_OceanJjb replied to SmartFixer_OceanJjb's topic in Mental Health, Serious Emotional Issues

    @TheFrown You are right --> I got to keep on moving. Sometimes even sunshine is too much for me. but you are right. I got to keep on moving. Thanks for your reminder!

  10. I Feel Fucked Up!

    SmartFixer_OceanJjb replied to zasa joey's topic in Mental Health, Serious Emotional Issues

    Hi! I was going to write almost same kinda thing. I lost my motivation to go on. I just wanted to tell you that you are not the only one in the situation. Sincerely.