Butters

You guys are gonna die when you see this:

Day 14: Recovered by being home alone with my 'autistic pains'. Honestly there has to be a word for it, it just means I get overstimulated in public to the point where it hurts and I just want to be home. Yesterday I had reached a pretty extreme version of that over-stimulation and I'd like to avoid this. Now shall I be completely honest? I feel that many people in public spaces want a part of my energy. I can just 'feel' people somehow reacting to my subtle movements, I can 'feel' girls energy like they're micro flirting with me. There's no way around this, I'm almost always hyper-aware of the people around me and their micro movements, and this costs me energy. The only solution would maybe be these glasses: Only €0,94 on AliExpress that's a steal! The solution is obviously not just sitting at home. Being in public doesn't just cost me energy, it also brings me energy. So on the one hand I'm completely wasting my energy by being out in public, on the other hand I'm gaining energy, confidence and overall happiness by being in public. Maybe the solution is to only go places that make me money, that add to my arsenal, instead of just random places to work on my laptop. Had a coaching call yesterday morning which just disturbed my flow. This was some serious stuff about my childhood and whatnot, I haven't been able to really focus on my work since. But I HAVE to focus on my work, I have no money in my bank account right now and no income so that's why I need that action-bias. I have to admit that I'm also quite disturbed by the fact that I don't have a romantic relationship. Just a girl who understands me, cares about me and I care about her. But most of my interactions are superficial and I have no interest in getting to know people. As I said here before there is a caring part of me that is completely underutilized right now, and starting an online business does not tap into that part of me. So how the F do I tap into that? Offer life coaching? I'm annoyed by my own indecisiveness right now, that's literally what I wrote under trap #1. I was doing fine on Thursday, you have no idea how good Thursday felt. So I shouldn't fall into this trap of believing thoughts that come to me on a low day like right now. Just stick with the program. Trap #39: External validation Made me think of this as another trap. I go out in public, many people look at me or want part of my energy, but on a day where fewer people look at me I may go "hey what happened? my energy must be off". So it becomes external validation. On the other hand; when fewer people look at me my energy might actually be off. But don't let this external validation lead me. Update: I just went for a little walk in nature and I realize that I'm simply dealing with some ego backlash here. Which brings me to the following... Plateaus: What if getting to my €10k pm income is a lot easier than I think? What if there's only, say 3 plateaus to get to that €10k I have to break through? For this example let's say there will be these three plateaus. First: starting my online coaching and consulting and content. Creating videos, funnels and getting clients. This is my current plateau. Second: expanding this into IRL seminars. Third: investing all my money back into the business to grow it. Yes these are kind of hypothetical but my point is what if this whole journey is simply breaking through plateaus?

Yeah the girls weren't attractive to me either. Some of the advice on Tinder and Instagram was good. The underlying problem with the whole video is it's still just driven by his need to impress or control narcissistic women, and I don't think men on this forum will resonate with that. You can also just go to a club, find a cute girl, dance, take her home, no need for all that fluff. He doesn't seem to want or understand genuine energy connection with people.

Plot twist: it's the same home!

Warren Buffet eats breakfast at McDonald's every day and he's a stage yellow billionaire so.

So glad you survived to tell the story ❤️

Watch Leo's video on stage turquoise.

OMG

No babe, YOUR body is God 😘

Day 13: I'm doing well this week but I am starting to notice a pattern. On Tuesday I was high energy, Wednesday low, Thursday high, Friday low. I need to figure out how to better conserve energy because this doesn't work optimally. So yes I need massive action right now but also this requires some contemplating; why do I seem to lose energy in public? So many people look at me and want a part of my energy, perhaps I delude my energy. I feel so shitty today, just my skin hurts like autistic backlash pains.

You're missing the point. He's suggesting having an actin bias, which is good cause most people are in their heads too much and the fear of experiencing will only increase that way.

Yeah I meant in some other field but similarly "genius" as a child?

So Leo were you like that kid Jake?

1. Get better at finances, you should have enough left to pay off debt while saving. Try to negotiate payments if necessary, and don't make more debt. 2. Think long term. You're making 6k pm from home you said, that's really good. Choose the pain of discipline today over the pain of losing that entirely. 3. You're over thinking a lot it seems, that's not going to get you anywhere. Even if you end up finding some LP that makes you totally happy, you're still better of maintaining the business and income. You can read my journal on this forum because I'm going through the same thing right now, but I'm in debt with almost no income so you have it really good actually.

Day 12: It's an interesting journey when you come from a seminar and you're all fired up but then reality kicks in, that's where the rubber meets the road. Monday and Tuesday I was ready to take on responsibility and took on my finances. I also visited my dad who is still recovering from the accident. I run into more traps and challenges and it's interesting to identify them. Also there's construction happening outside my house which is annoying and therefor I can't work from home. On the plus side this forced me to wake up at 5AM today, do my morning routine in quiet and then leave the house like an actual person, it's kinda cool cause it was sunny. I've decided to look for money making opportunities so I created an account on Upwork and applied for some Etsy related jobs which is where my expertise is. I want to build this out and create a persona as an Etsy consultant / coach on social media to land clients. This goes hand in hand with doing e-commerce on Etsy and Shopify and it's just a logical step. Also if I use Youtube to get clients it allows me to be creative and work with video which is also helpful for my stand-up. Fantastic video by Owen that inspired me: To help me with freelancing I found Deya on Youtube who is excellent: It's all about ACTION, nothing else gets me results at this point. So other than the fluffy stuff I've talked about so far, let's list the actions I've taken and haven't taken so far this week and why: Actions taken: Looked at my finances and put all my spending of this year into a Google Sheet Spoke on the phone with my municipality about money Did Uber Eats twice this week Created Upwork profile and applied for 2 Etsy jobs Emailed somebody about buying an old Print-on-Demand Shopify store I'm still looking to sell Wrote jokes daily and applied for spots Emailed a local comedy club for spots Brainstormed my Etsy consulting business further, came up with a brand name Next actions: Create a Fiverr Gig Continue applying for jobs on Upwork daily Create a Freelancer profile and a few other sites Create a brand Instagram and do some cold outreach to Etsy store owners who could benefit from my services Identify existing Etsy coaches and consultants and copy their pricing structure When I've identified those people I can perhaps find gaps in the market Create FB group for Etsy From there, create a brand and regular video content for Youtube and Instagram, and maybe TikTok And I've identified more traps: Trap #25: Supermarkets I found out that I've spent €690.59 at the supermarket this month and I used my card at the supermarket over 100 times. These are small purchases I make for comfort. It's both comfort eating because of stress but also just the feeling of having some control over my life by buying something at the supermarket. Even after I've identified this trap I still fall into it every day. Trap #26: Looking down on people So basically looking down on "normal" people because they don't do personal development, they're not interested in truth, they're not aware of any of this. Well, most people work hard to feed their families, what do I do? I'm single, I don't have a family to feed and I'm unwilling to work for a boss. How the hell can I complain? Trap #27: Fearful thoughts Or more accurately: taking these thoughts seriously at all Trap #28: Self-shaming Self shaming for having sexual desires mostly. Trap #29: Glorifying NoFap Just another distraction from not taking action. Whether you fapped or not, take action towards your goals, that should be the North Star. Trap #30: Mental loyalty Loyalty to old friends or my dad, or old ways of doing things. I think what happens is I play a mental movie of talking to an old friend and then to want to "please" them I emulate a certain behavior. So this is immature behavior, like I'm trying to impress old friends in my head or try to fit in. This is all just a mental movie. Trap #31: Taking life advice I know goddamn well what I want and I'm working on it right now. I call this rightly placed confidence. If ignorance gets me to my dream life then fuck yeah let me be ignorant af. Trap #32: Thinking the universe owes me something Cause I have such good character. That's not how it works. Take massive action into areas that make lots of money, don't expect it to just come to you because you're such a good guy at heart. Complete horseshit, very destructive. Trap #33: Putting responsibility outside of myself I am responsible for absolutely everything, including which thoughts I take seriously. And of course my situation in life. Note: watch for subtle signs of creating seperation and doubt in myself or my abilities. Trap #34: Autistic paranoia and downtime I might have a fantastic day where I'm in a "rush of excitement" over my future and whatnot. This was on Tuesday. I also traveled. Then at night I had fears and doubt set into my mind. The next day I felt bad, couldn't focus. Then at night I already felt better and this morning woke up feeling great. So I need some downtime on my own after such a busy day. Also I get paranoid sometimes, I think these are both a little autistic. Trap #35: Irregular sleep Waking up early just work better Trap #36: Checking email No need to check email all the time Trap #37: Traps I will fall into them, that's why they're traps. Not expecting to fall into traps is a trap. Trap #38: Stage Orange This one is interesting. I sometimes fall into a "Stage Orange Rush" that doesn't suit me. The trick is to embody Orange while remaining chill and not taking it too seriously.

Day 9: To say it in self-help terms: this weekend was absolutely transformational. On Saturday I went to the Tony Robbins seminar and on Sunday to the financial seminar, both by the same organisation and both were 100% free. These seminars were both so excellent that I've made the decision to start my business up again. This won't be easy - in fact I expect this to be very challenging from my current position, but it's better than the alternative of not being able to run my own business for the next 18 months while being in some government program and focusing solely on comedy. I am both a comedian and an entrepreneur, I can't do much about that. The conflict between those two is the issue itself. What I learned at the Tony Robbins seminar is that windows of opportunity open, but those doors only stay open for a short while and you must make the change within a few days of the seminar or you'll go back to the old. So let's do that, today. Towards the end of last week I was feeling pretty shitty, but now I feel so much more empowered and confident in my own abilities that I'm willing to give my online business another try. A real try. The toxic positivism and wishful thinking got in my way this year, so let's face all the challenged head-on this time and expect things to be difficult. Really fucking difficult. Let's recap the events from this past weekend: Tony Robbins Seminar: These are just some notes I took. I don't have time to properly write everything out here so if you want the full experience I highly recommend you go to a similar NLP even near you. Regular text = seminar Green text = own insight People get stuck in their bad behavior that originally had good intentions in childhood. They go and stand for the problem of their parents. So this girl was suicidal, and Tony found out that her suicidal talk came from her wanting her parents to stay together, and if she's suicidal they will have to stay together. We just watched a video, Tony Robbins wasn't there lol. People's needs are: #1: Safety, security, certainty (feeling of) #2: Variation, uncertainty #3: Significance #4: Love / connection I noticed in myself I have some insecurities around women, which then turns into small narcicistic games where I "punish" or "correct" her behavior for wanting control. I have to let this go. So the first decision I made at this seminar was I will go out more and do some pick-up because that's another area in my life I've been neglecting. What Tony does is he changes people's perspective, and that is all. Quote: "There are no incompetent people, only incompetent states of being". State = everything What would excellence look like in my field of work? I noticed the thoughts that came up in my head during this seminar. They were about going out clubbing, having sex with girls and starting up my Shopify PoD business. I realized I shouldn't ignore these thoughts or choose one over the other, but acknowledge my desires and start fulfilling them accordingly. So work on my business, go out on the weekends. The only difference between successful and unsuccessful people is the made up glass ceasing "cannot" - limiting beliefs. When the speaker started his business he had no money, he had lots of debt from his previous business, but he had creativity. The bigger your goal, the bigger the price you pay, so more growth is required. Sidenote: he invested all profit back in his business. Successful people always ask; "What can I do for you / them?" instead of "what can another do for me". You just need to be more creative. Seek and you shall find, but seeking is an active thing. The answer is already there, right now in this moment. The moment you can change something, a door opens, but the door won't stay open for long. If you don't act fast, your state will revert back to the old and the door will close again. That applies to the state you're in after such an even, so take action. Then he talked about NLP and changing the state associated to trauma. What am I afraid of / stressed about? THAT is the thing I must go through, because all the juice is behind overcoming those fears. Behind your biggest fear is your greatest win. Start the day with grattitude. After the seminar do 1 thing that scares me (in my case the finances). Conclusion: After the seminar I felt strongly about starting my own business up again. It was constantly on my mind. I didn't know how but I might as well give it another shot. Financial Seminar: Now here's the real juice because finances is my biggest sticking point, which is why I started this journey thread. I will summarize my notes here and after that I will start working on a plan for myself. This plan will include a financial strategy as well as a business plan for my new Print-on-Demand Shopify store. If you eat candy for one day, you're fine. You eat candy for a whole week, you're still fine. But you eat candy every day for 10 years and you'll be horribly ill. It's the same with your finances. It is a daily habit where you'll see results overtime. I had to rate my current financial situation and my work. I rated financial at a 1/10 and my work at a 7/10, where I choose work to be my stand-up comedy and online business combination. So what does a financial 10/10 look like? €10.000 per month net after tax in passive income so I can travel the world and focus on my stand-up comedy, my relationships, travel and personal development. I also have €150.000 in savings which I see as a comfortable amount. To me this equals no more worries about not having enough money in my life. I told my goals in front of the group and the speaker said this is a good start but still incomplete, because you also need to be able to handle money well. This is exactly my sticking point. Then we had to write down our regular expenses (fixed charges like food, electricity, rent etc). One of the first steps to passive income is to have a source of passive income that covers these basic expenses. I would feel totally free if I had a passive income working for me that covers all my basic needs. To get there, I must change my behavior. He explained that nearly everyone in the room could already be financially free had they had the right habits in place. I agree with that. I have bad habits and negative emotions around money. Here's how to get there: Step 1: know what you want Step 2: make the decision that financial freedom is an absolute requirement for me in my life (many people have not made this decision firmly) Step 3: start creatively seeking out opportunities towards financial freedom. Nobody said this was easy, and it doesn't just come to you. It is an active process. So why am I in my current poor financial situation? Because I made the decision to not be smart and responsible with my money. Financial freedom begins in your own state, your own beliefs, in your own head. What are my core values in life? Artistic / creative freedom Love Free thinking / freedom of thought Honesty Do these conflict with my financial goals? Absolutely. But this is just a story I tell myself. Next we had to find our limiting beliefs around money. The goal here was to be pessimistic; the version of you who is tired at the end of the day. What does that version of you think about money? Money Association Assignment: Can you start to see why my financial situation is so bad? I have tons of negative beliefs around money. Next I had to give a number rating (1 through 10) for limiting beliefs on that sheet of paper. These are very common, and I will list the ones I rated a 7/10 or higher: Can you see why I'm struggling? I have over 40(!!!) limiting beliefs around money! So what I need to do is work on these, actively, from now on. I will do this by changing my surroundings (the people I hang out with) and doing NLP exercises. This chart from Robert Kiyosaki shows active and passive income sources you can have: Ultimately you want to move to the right-side columns as much as possible. You can even move to Investor (I) from Employment(E), it just takes longer because people in Self employed (S) typically have more to invest. Business owner (B) is only for a certain type of person, but I see myself getting there. [table] [tr][th]Income[/th][th]Now[/th][th]Goal[/th][/tr] [tr][td]Active[/td][td]1000[/td][td]3000[/td][/tr] [tr][td]Passive business[/td][td]0[/td][td]10000[/td][/tr] [tr][td]Passive investment[/td][td]0[/td][td]2500[/td][/tr] [/table] Action point: make a plan for my income goal Here they explained that by delivering greater value doing something most people can't, you receive more. Cleaners bring tremendous value to society but because society deems their jobs as replaceable (most people can clean) they get paid minimally. Brain surgeons are rare and deliver value, so they get paid more. Action point: Find out where people pay good money and how can I apply myself there? What are my skills? What will be my strategy? How do I think about it now? Next we talked about different jars you should have, these are: Self-development jar Wealth and freedom jar Fundamental expenses jar (includes debt payments) Long-term spending jar (saving for bigger purchases like car) Charity jar Fun jar Discipline yourself to manage your money in this way. That means only use the jars for what they're meant for. If you can't do this with €10, you're not gonna be able to do it with €10.000. The important principle here is: pay yourself first. If tomorrow you get taxed an extra 10%, you'll be able to live. So you will also live with 10% less that goes directly in your savings. That is a lesson on compound interest. Let's say you invest €1000 at 10%. The only way to make more from that is to either increase the amount or the return %. There's multiple routes to there: Route 1: learn compound interest Route 2: real estate Then they talked about trading. Trading is where you buy a share for €100 and sell it for €102. If you do this consistently and successfully 7/10 times, you'll make a great return. Next they talked about real estate and trading, which I won't go into here. The rule with real estate is that slow and steady wins the race; it's a long game. Next they talked about changing your social circle. You have friends who you outgrow, you have friends just for laughs, but you can also make friends who always talk about growing their wealth and their portfolio. I need to create a social circle in this area of life as well. You'll either feel the pain of regret or the pain of discipline, but with the right people around you it will be easier. To stay on track they showed this model: APMP This stands for: Access Plan Mentorship Peers Having Access increases your chances of financial success by 10%. Having a plan by 65% and having the right mentorship by 95%. Those are my notes from the seminar. Books: Rich Dad, Poor Dad and Holy Grail of investing. My most important point of action now is: Overcoming my limiting beliefs around money by taking massive action. Next steps: After both seminars, here are things I'm going to do: Start each day with gratitude Find people to be around who are also making money Actively seek out opportunities for growth Make a plan for my finances and business Budget Do pickup on the weekends Trap #19: Toxic positivism Why did I not see those limiting beliefs earlier? Because looking at my finances, looking at my limiting beliefs around money put me in a bad mood. Earlier this year I was stuck in this toxic positivism and it wasn't healthy. Trap #20: Not doing hard things Only doing what feels right cause "that's just me man". No, stop that. Do the things right now that I'll feel good about in 24 hours. Trap #21: Not hitting the gym for 1 week+ No matter the excuse Trap #22: Overeating No need for me to eat during the day. Also: eating a lot before gym even if its low carb. Maybe just a light salad at most, or some eggs but no beans or yoghurt or anything cooked with lots of butter of fish. Trap #23: Conceptualizing Conceptualizing self and career, and thinking too much Trap #24: Not doing pickup This leads to all sort of stupid problems for no reason, ends up cluttering my mind.

Day 6: I think I've identified another major obstacle in my life. Two weeks ago my dad was in the hospital and we thought he was going to die. So for about two weeks I was in touch with family and friends of his I hadn't seen in years and I was taking care of him. This situation gave me a tremendous amount of rest and I was very calm and collected. When I started this thread saying I don't care about money, what I think I meant was I am not fully selfishly motivated. Putting my dad's needs before my own gave me something valuable. I really became a better version of myself; reliable, mature, caring. Closer to what a man looks like. Now that he's doing better this has kind of faded. I know that when he's not in the hospital he still needs help but is usually unwilling to accept it. My caring side, putting other's needs before my own is something I never utilize. Perhaps five or ten years ago I was fine just being alone and working on my business, but this becomes harder and harder to do because the motivation is simply not strong enough. I still need a lot of time on my own, but having something higher than just my own needs that I can care for while respecting my own pace is important. How do I get this? I have no idea. Maybe I really need a girlfriend, or a pet. I don't think the pet works because it's just a pet. What I do know is that when I conceptualize myself, my life and my career I become neurotic just sitting at home. The social aspect of life is missing here and fixing this financial stuff seems near enough impossible from this position. Humans are social animals and we're motivated by social dynamics, not by thoughts in isolation. Unfortunately the comedy scene doesn't suffice for all my social needs because it's still just career. Business and motivation: I just spoke to the institution who can help resolve the debt, it's a long process and I won't go into the details for now. Basically the next step is to unregister my current business and go into the process with them. I would then ultimately have to find a type of employment and can start another business 1.5 - 2 years from now. I'm not sure how I feel about this. The other option would be to rejuvenate my current business and have a profitable, growing business again within weeks. I will have to make this decision before Monday. I'm attending a Tony Robbins type of seminar this weekend so let's see what kind of inspiration that brings. Is it technically possible to kickstart my business again? I believe so. Businesses don't fail, people do (in a business setting). But it technically being possible doesn't mean much. If I were to now start a print-on-demand store on my own Shopify domain and start doing marketing, it could be possible, with some connections maybe, to make that work. I would sell a high-margin product like the one I showed earlier or a high-margin product off of Printify. Then I would approach influencers and give them a promo code through Shopify's partner program. They get a commission when somebody buys through their code and I get customers. This way I can kickstart a business without need for capital. So what's stopping me? Well, what stopped me from doing this 4 months ago, 12 months or 3 years ago? I've always known rationally that I shouldn't just depend on my Etsy shop and start my own Shopify and do marketing. So why didn't I do this? I think I enjoyed the comfort of my Etsy shop and it somewhat tied into my artistic desires. All I had to do was create designs in Photoshop, then upload them to my Shop and customers came and I made money. But my own Shopify would require marketing; something I deem as not artistically expressive. It's almost like a more REAL form of entrepreneurship requires proper accounting, bookkeeping and marketing which is fucking boring. That's where I run into motivational issues. Intrinsically I'm motivated positively, not negatively. I guess I just don't give a fuck about business. Yes it's interesting, yes I like the idea of having the income so that I can do my comedy, but I'd only somewhat enjoy the business if its going well. If things don't go so well it would already deter me. So any form of resistance or stress coming from the business would steer me away from it and further into doing comedy. This will create more division in my life. Trap #16: This journal Because overanalyzing every little thing also isn't healthy. My life is supposed to flow naturally, that's the place I want to live from. Trap #17: Jumping to conclusion Reading back, I also shouldn't jump to conclusions too quickly. There must have been other aspects I did enjoy. However under the current pressure of debt it's just hard to make inspired decisions in this domain. When I started this journal on Monday I came from a different place than right now. It's important to recognize I cannot make the right decisions from a low place. Why am I lower today than Monday? Not a clue. Could be diet, could be financial stress, could be PMO, could be something else. Could also be the fact I started this journal and started thinking about all these things which then ruined my flow. Flow comes from living for a higher purpose, not frantically focusing on my stupid little financial problems. Nobody cares! Question then becomes: how do I work on these things WHILE NOT TAKING IT TOO SERIOUSLY? How do I do this without attachment? How do I do this joyfully with complete faith? Independent of outcome? Trap #18: Rational thinking In addition to wishful thinking, getting overly rational is also bad.

Oh great answer, thank you.

Guys like this had lots of stage red in them. If you watch Dragon's Den you'll find people who are very financially successful that are pure Orange, sometimes with some Blue tendencies (strong family values). That's a lot healthier. What you think?

Leo said in his traps video about martial arts trap but then he didn't explain.

Day 4: I'm planning to do a complete post-mortum on my 4-year print-on-demand business that I ran from 2020 to 2024. I will post that here. Before I can start a new business, I must identify exactly what went wrong and how I can avoid the traps in my next venture. Only once I have done that can I start my next business. If I just start my next business on a whim, I will make the same mistakes again and waste so much time. I'm convinced I can make this work and reach 10K pm in profit after tax, I just need the right approach. The cool thing about a post-mortum like the one I'm working on is that by knowing exactly what I did wrong (in exact detail), it should automatically draw out how to start my new business. So by carefully analyzing my mistakes I'm basically getting top-level, accurate, personalized mentorship for free. A little preview of that post-mortum: my biggest mistake was not knowing my numbers, not looking at them at all. I could have made plenty of other mistakes, wasting time in different areas of my business, but the one mistake of financial mismanagement was deadly. In order to succeed at this, I must get better at my finances. And what better way to learn than from my own financial history? I have everything logged, I just need to study my own numbers. I couldn't learn all this from a book, it's right here under my nose! I've also updated my previous post with more traps. Unfortunately the forum doesn't allow me to edit that post anymore but once I identify more traps I will add them. Will post the full post-mortum here soon, hopefully that will be interesting to you guys as well.

Let's say you can create a little space between you and your thoughts by meditating. This gives you some peace and clarity. But what if you create a LOT of space? More space = more peace? What about INFINITE space between you and your thoughts? Just a thought.

Just got around to watching this, wonderful! In between his responses you can see, nobody there 🤷‍♀️

Traps: It is important I know my personal traps. I've "failed" at my business earlier so I must avoid certain traps. Let's look at these one by one. Trap #1: Wriggling Being indecisive, making a decision and changing it quickly. For example I could think "oh this business isn't really who I am, I'm a comedian and I should focus on that". And then the next moment I go "no I'm also a real entrepreneur". This back-and-forth can be deadly. Solution is to be patient, and once a decision has been made, stick to it. And of course; never lose the goal out of sight. That's why I hammer so hard in this thread that the PURPOSE OF THE BUSINESS IS TO FUEL MY COMEDY. Also the impulse to quickly shift between business models "oh this isn't for me, let's do something else" or "this isn't working". Trap #2: Finances Poor financial management, not willing to look at my financial situation, seeing money as unimportant, glorifying money, identifying negatively with money, "struggling" with money, strong negative emotions around money, seeing money as something that would save me from my (bad) current situation. The whole subject of money seems often tied to my fight-or-flight response. Another example: receiving money, then immediately think of paying bills and thinking "it's not enough". Solution I think is gratitude and accepting reality on reality's terms. I'm still working on this. Trap #3: Impulsivity Ties in with traps 1 and 2. It's just work, it's just money, leave your emotions at the door. Solution to impulsivity: taking time. Nothing can really happen to me, I'll live. Also stoicism. Also planning my days. Trap #4: Influencers Love this trap! So basically I'd start watching some hardcore millionaire entrepreneur on YouTube and try to emulate his whole style of work. He might talk about monk-mode or hustling really hard, or perhaps following some strict diet or regimen for success. These kinds of things don't resonate with me, and once again, a split will occur "maybe this is what I should be". Yeah, don't think so. Once again, here I can create a duality between my "comedian self" and my "hustling entrepreneur self". Unnecessary, bullshit. This split may indicate a lack of confidence in my abilities as an entrepreneur. Trap #5: Taking it all too seriously Love this trap too! I'd start taking myself so damn seriously, it ruins my quality of life. Who cares!? It's just work. Jesus. Ironically by not taking it too seriously and staying true to my core values, I actually have way more success. Picture a comedian being at home alone doing monk-mode on his online business because some influencer said so while not making any money. Now that's a good joke. Trap #6: No balance Ties in with all the above. What I mean by this one is an obsessive behavior in a toxic way. I will completely isolate socially and kind of stop being myself, all because I MUST make this business work, and THEN I can present myself to others. Or whatever. So it's putting my real self into the future, or something like that. All because I am DISHONEST about my actual situation while living in fantasy-land where I'm a millionaire 'soon'. Then of course I become defensive once the fantasy gets attacked. This has to stop. Thankfully with my business failing this has stopped, lol. Trap #7: Stress Doubt and worry creates more doubt and worry. Quite literally. Such wasted energy. In my old state of mind, the business SUCCEEDING would actually be the worst outcome. Having money would be worse than not having money, because not having money you have nothing to lose. So if I want to have a nice income, I better not be emotionally attached to it. It's just money, it's just work. Family, friends, comedy, a blooming flower, all things that are way more important. If my next business succeeds but then fails again in the long run, I'll be fine. I'll be fine. I'll be fine. Seriously, that's the irony of it all. If you worry, you're not fine. If you don't worry, you're fine. The worry ITSELF is the fucking problem you idiot. Trap #8: Alcohol, cigarettes, drugs Had some drinks last night at a comedy show and the next day I definitely notice more ego than usual. I'm a bit less serene, a little less at peace with reality. Something about alcohol that does a number on my intuitive feeling. If I want to strive, I'd have to give up drinking almost entirely. At comedy shows I will be tempted constantly to drink, so I'm gonna have to learn to say no. I can imagine regular drinking completely ruining my nice intuitive and peaceful states of being so let's not even go there. Cigarettes are also ridiculous for many reasons, mainly: fucks up my health in the short term, makes me catch flues makes my mind obsessed with smoking instead of focusing on the task at hand gives me weird tingles from not getting enough oxygen in my blood (I think) expensive af, and since it's addictive I'll spend money on it constantly while smoking obvious longer term health consequences it stinks I'm not going to discuss harder drugs but they're just a more hardcore version of the alcohol, creating more ego and basically misery. I've a bit of an addictive personality. So how do I avoid this trap? Instead of simply saying "stop drinking" I could make a rule not to drink at comedy shows, because that's where most of the temptation will be. Let's make that rule now; no alcohol at comedy shows. Well, for me at least, God forbid the audience stopped drinking. That covers alcohol, because with alcohol I can be loose since I've never really been tempted to become a daily drinker. With cigarettes I need to be more strict, there is no casual smoking for me. So also; a cigarette-free existence. Trap #9: Not doing comedy Not applying for spots or not writing out of some fear or neurosis. Solution: daily habit of writing, daily habit of applying for spots and never canceling a show for no good reason. Trap #10: The comedy scene Funny how this is a trap in and of itself. This one includes: Getting caught up in drama Taking the comedy scene too serious Thinking I'm gonna 'make it' and identifying as such Comparing myself to others Being jealous of other's careers and progress Thinking or speaking badly of other comedians Giving away personal power in exchange for 'career help' from narcissists Expecting things from others in the scene Any form of judgement of self or other I've spoken to experienced comedians and often these guys are very humble and interested in another, they don't have their own heads up their ass. How else would you make it? Unless you actually suffer from NPD, you will need to genuinely cooperate with others to keep doing this. But at the same time, everyone is in it for themselves so don't think of anyone as your true friends. Each individual and institution within this scene serves a specific purpose. It's a very stage Orange environment. This trap is multidimensional and very tricky, because I could go ahead and vilify the scene now based how it functions, which would be yet another trap. Funny enough, thinking of the comedy scene as being selfish and not having my back, is in itself selfish. The solution here is to stay true to myself and understand who I am; not just a comedian, but also someone who's into self-actualization and business, and has his own values and beliefs. The comedy scene is not worth sacrificing the self for, but I should not push against it either. Be like water. Trap #11: Balance I could write a whole entry on just this. I'm a guy who really needs balance. I'm an individualist but I need to also function in groups. I'm a thinker but I also need to let that go. I'm a taker but I also need to give. I'm still trying to find this balance. My personality is usually obsessive, lacking balance, which breeds stress. Recently it's going better. See also: letting go, having faith Trap #12: Conflict Oh boy! This ties in again with earlier points. This is such a bare ego thing. My ego wants to push off against the 'other'. These are all thoughts. I've spent years resenting my dad, resenting the comedy scene, resenting certain people, even resenting kind of random people. I've even had a period where I thought everyone was a 'narcissist' and out to exploit me. And for what? Just wasted time. Let it go. Trap #13: Arrogance and superiority Again, ties in with earlier points. Arrogance and superiority are also forms of self-harm and are ultimately a waste of time. Accept life and reality as it comes. Trap #14: Intuition I should follow my intuition more and be a peace with the consequences. If I really want to go out and party, then go out and party. Then accept the hangover and empty bank account the next day also. Burn through the karma as much as you please with a positive attitude. Don't judge it. This is my life, so live it. Don't become dogmatic about these traps or this journey, it's a waste of mental energy. Trap #15: Pedestalizing outcomes See also: putting happiness off into the future. Don't link happiness to outcome. This moment right now is as good as it will ever get.

Day 2: So, once again, the business must serve as fuel for my comedy. The moment I forget that, I go down a road I don't wanna go down again. So if I'd have to cancel an open mic or have less time to just be completely free with my creative thoughts, I'm fucking up. This does not mean I cannot put dedicated focused time towards the business, but it must never take away from comedy. Ever. Not mentally or time-wise. I watched some videos on funnels yesterday and it annoyed me. Even the word marketing makes me wanna vomit a little. So becoming a guy who sells marketing services perhaps isn't the right way. What business models do fit my criteria? YouTube channel(s) Shopify; dropshipping or print-on-demand Selling digital products through my own website Amazon FBA or similar Affiliate marketing (funnel) Etsy is not on the list for several reasons, mainly that it requires you to reply to customers within 24 hours and is much less scalable. If I were to start something like print-on-demand again I'd wanna sell through my own website, which is then also an asset that can be sold. Let's go over each one: YouTube channel: So I currently have this spirituality / law of attraction Youtube channel where I make faceless videos with Elevenlabs. You might think this is fast but it takes a lot of time for me to make a video. Flippa is a website auction marketplace that now also allows you to sell established YouTube channels so if I can build this out to be a bigger channel I can not only monetize it but also sell the asset in the long run. I do enjoy making these videos, so I will continue doing that. I just need to figure out why my videos got up to 5K views and new ones that I upload get almost no views. So basically; learn Youtube. That's a good skill for me to have as a comedian as well, so I will continue with this channel. Shopify: If I were to start another Shopify store it would be a high-margin Print-on-Demand product. For example, this die-cut metal sign from Teelaunch: This has a $50 or higher margin. I would not sell t-shirts or anything like that on my own Shopify because the profits are just too low. I would add a personalization app to my Shopify store and offer customized signs or other products that people buy as gifts. This is similar to what I have experience with on Etsy, so I kinda know the market and everything. I have very little experience with PPC ads, social media or any form of marketing a business like this. But if I choose the right product I'd be happy to learn. Really, the key is choosing a high-margin product. Imagine the difference between waking up to 2 sales totaling $10 profit or 2 sales totaling $150 profit. Big difference in motivation. For this I'd probably choose influencers to help mostly with the promotion, but I would ultimately split between PPC ads, organic social, influences and SEO / Youtube SEO. Digital products: Not a clue what I would sell as digital products through my own website. I have no intention of putting together a course on anything. Selling ChatGPT prompts or something is going to get old really fast and probably won't even exist anymore in 18 months. I could sell digital assets that people could use for their Etsy shops but I already do that on my Etsy digital store right now. This would again be very small amounts, I don't see the point and seems like a lot of work. Actually if I were to do that last one it could work with YT shorts / TikTok and promote them as Etsy supplies. But mostly SEO for low-comp high-search keywords. Amazon FBA: Never done it. Requires research and upfront investment. Does seem to have high potential, especially when I combine it with a local competitor that is similar to FBA. Affiliate Marketing (funnel): This could be anything. I was once in a live webinar where they sold a $1500 online course on making money. I ended up pirating this thing and it was just hypnosis tapes. Imagine creating a funnel and making $500+ per sign up for something like this. The money really seems insane, especially once you have a solid PPC campaign running. I could also do this for local self-help seminars. === All in all, for now, my mind goes towards creating the high-margin print-on-demand Shopify store. I have experience with print-on-demand and having a Shopify store that does $5K profit per month you could sell for 18 - 24 months of profit on Flippa or through a broker like Empire Flippers. So even if this is not something I want to continue with 3 years from now, I could still sell it for $5K*24 = $120K. Just a hypothetical of course. But that's the cool thing about having your own asset instead of an Etsy shop; it actually has value. I could also end up with a combination of income streams, but when I start this I should focus on just 1 and really build that out with patience and consistency. Note: if you're wondering why I don't try to monetize my stand-up on Youtube for example, is because I don't want to contaminate my art with commerce. Sure I might have podcasts or stand-up on Youtube once I get a little better but this shouldn't be for the money. So I kinda want to be financially independent so I can pursue my art properly without financial motive.