Nahm

Sounds to me like you like him quite a bit, and that you need to slow down a little. Keep the PD going. Is he into or open to PD? What was the gift??

everything is behind the scenes

That seemed like a great epiphany. That's awesome! ?

Einstein imagined flying on a beem of light as a child. He references it as his inspiration to pursue science and the speed of light. He wondered if the beem would appear to be standing still.

Don't think about what other people think, they probably love you. You're losing energy thinking about some of the stuff you mentioned. Use all your energy for what you want. If your thoughts stray, meditate daily. Write what you want to accomplish on the wall, and write as many WHY's next to each as you can think of. Get your prefocus game going. Empty your room out, then make it an environment that primes you toward what you want. You get what you think about. Your thinking and how you feel are the most important thing, - choices are made from here. Attitude is everything, and yours is currently not pointed in the same direction as what you want to accomplish. Start making lists about why you want what you want. Focus on it. Hard work will also do all of this for you.

It is almost like you excercised your free will or even made a decision to stop adding to this thread. ??‍♂️ Almost. Just kidding!!!!!! I choose to learn about playing chess and the board. I could never fill the actual capacity of my brain, so there is no reason for me to limit my learning. More data = better decisions. I mean, what's the point of personal development if deep down you believe you have no choice? I honesty did not know you were upset by this. I really do think I have free will, so I assumed if you liked other subjects or posts you would simply choose them instead, like I do. I do apologize if I have made you upset. So even if you tell me you have experienced the everything, that you understand you are God, and God therefore has no free will, I would still be the @Neo Fun is more categorical for some than others. I respect your interest in talking and I respect @I_Like_Thing 's interest in not talking. @Vanish I think you have it backwards. Please feel free to respond and please feel free not to respond. If I have already offended you I apologize.

That is sooo funny!

@Steph1988 Sorry man. I was trying to be pushy in the color of 'wake up'. I've been wondering how you are doing? Have you written down anything you want? Any progress with the change at work you mentioned? Whatsup?

@Bodhi123 I hear that. I have lived that way before. What would you say to the idea that rather than proceed and do something you don't want to do, that you could change your perspective and want and enjoy the doing of it, or pick something else to do? Since everything is one connected causation, you don't have to connect too many dots to see the value or benefit in things. What if 'work' is just a concept? For a few years, I did dry wall and roofing. We had a great time. Crazy talk? What if your emotions have been telling you the truth all along?

@blazed Yes. Randomness is not free will.

@Neo It's not the free will proof that matters to me, nor what we believe, nor whether I am right or wrong. It's the learning experience itself that I enjoy. I like learning about the topic and people, whether they are loving, decent, kind, ignorant, genius, insane. The more variety the better. To me it's more experience and builds a larger frame of reference and capacity. When we reach our capacity of thought, we become aggressive and belittling. I like pushing the limits of my thinking as much as I like nonthinking meditation. Both result in more capacity to be connected and blissful. I don't find anything undesirable about a person who simply likes to play chess. I don't find anything undesirable about someone who wants to learn how the pieces are made. I'm interested. It's not the topic or subject matter. It's like fun. It's not found somewhere. We make fun. We make interest too. It does not behoove me to limit either. It feels awesome to expand either. For example, if you were talking with someone about quantum physics and they start using parables and analogies to elude the subject, there is something to be experienced and learned there as well. It's not good or bad, or right or wrong. It's not personal. I of course trust everything here is voluntary, no one is being held captive to having to read or comment on certain topics. It's all for fun, experience, and personal development.

@I_Like_Thing Probably hard to believe, but one man's skeeball is another man's free will inquiry.

@PetarKa "A Paradox Of Life - If There Is No Good Or Evil, Then How Can We Say That Self-actualization Is The The Goal Of Life?" Good and evil, goals, are preferences. Some we easily agree on, some we don't. So there are 8 billion versions. Outside of those preferences, all is what it is. The question is, what do you prefer? You are free to make that preference your experience. Letting go is very relative to your life experience and current situations. You may need to let go of things that I have never experienced. Generally speaking though, there are 2 of me. The higher self / everything / God...and the ego, which chooses not to simply sit on a hill and bask in the bliss of everythingness. I love being both. I lead a very high energy full life. As careful as I am with my perspective, outlook, health, etc - I of course still accumulate resistant thought and emotion, like I assume everyone does. I do not proceed with it though. I have found a letting go process that works for me and has sticking power. When I learn new things, face challenges, etc, I feel a slight impurity or disharmony, so I do my letting go work to get empty again. Here's what I have found works for me: Sleep: Before you fall sleep, increase your awareness that we all wake up everyday with zero thought momentum. Waking: When you wake up, notice how you awoke with no thought momentum. Admit to yourself, that if you immediately fill your head back up with yesterday's thoughts, that is a choice you are unknowingly making. If this sounds foreign to you, give it a few mornings and you'll start to notice the choice. I have a piece of paper placed so I see it when I wake up that says "DO NOT THINK WITHIN 1 HOUR OF WAKING. DO NOT THINK BEFORE EXCERCISING". Your paper would probably say something different. Whatever works for you. I implement a mental / verbal excercise so that I don't think in a wandering way. I take deep breaths and focus on what a fucking miracle it is that I can take a deep breath. I notice the sweetness of it. The good fortune. The deliciousness. I play the 'my favorite' game. Everything I see (on the way to my coffee maker) I say "You're my favorite". - "You're my favorite blanket" "You're my favorite light switch" "You're my favorite steps" "You're my favorite cup" "You're my favorite coffee bean" It sets the state of mind I want. Then I have my coffee. (Which is really a cappuccino but I don't want to sound all cappucinoish) Meditation: Then I meditate. I focus on my breathing and let the thoughts, if any, pass right on through. I don't write them down. I don't try to remember them. I let ALL of them pass right on through. I don't identify with them. I am the everything. This non thinking meditation is easy because I have practiced every morning for twenty some years, and I have primed myself for it since the first second I woke up. I relax every little muscle from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet. I feel the wave of relaxation move through me. I do this 4 or 5 times, deeper and deeper, until I feel the tiniest muscles in my spine relax. Muscles I didn't even know were flexed. Day: Then, throughout the day, I notice in very black and white - someone's energy is higher than mine or lower than mine. (Not the person, the energy) If it's lower than mine, I am mindful to use compassion, never empathy. If it is higher than mine, I am mindful to use curiosity, humility and attention. This 'way' if you will, prevents most of the resistant thought that would later need letting go of. Next day, repeat. *Realizing how long this is. I hope it's helpful or at least worth reading. Godspeed.

@Loreena What a great post!! Have you tried cardio & meditation every morning, vs workouts four times a week? I have found I keep in a consistent higher energy adding those in daily then I did when I was alternating days. Just a thought though. Your overall rituals are awesome and very well thought out! It's nice of you to share! What about the deeper nonphysical energies? This post is in the self act section vs the health section so I', thinking it's ok to go there and would really love to hear your, or anyone's rituals for connection.

This is a great thread. Thank you guys. Everything is already so well said. I'll contribute an 'actionable' that I use sometimes. I think a great excercise in mindfulness, is to go through your day not talking. Just observe. You'll become more aware of when you would have reacted. Just notice those reactions but don't say anything or react. After a while, you become free to choose pro actions.

@BobbyEmily My pleasure, and much love to you!!!! Here's another thought that comes to mind. One's 'life purpose' comes from all their experiences so far, one defines the other. To put it very simply, if you grow up with an angry dad, part of your life purpose involves living with peace of mind. If you grow up wth a sick mom, part of your life purpose involves good health. So the answer is inherently in you. You can ultimately transcend the cause and effect of your upbringing and then have the mental freedom to choose anything. When you reach that point, you wouldn't be looking for anything anymore. You would be it.

I could be completely off but I get the impression what you realily want is to make changes and you are not sure why it is hard for you. I suggest less thinking is better because your thinking might be what is keeping you from progressing. (Thoughts - bad emotions - no motivation) I suggest DOING something different. Get out of your head. Almost anything different. To 'wake' you up. I would make a list of suggestions, but it could be distracting. It's the doing, not the learning that is the change. Learning is of course helpful, but I get the impression you are beyond ready for a change. Pick something really small that you want to change and do it and let us know what it was and how it felt. That quote is just something you're reading and talking about while someone else is changing what they want to change. Stop looking for answers. The answer is you doing something different. Get a large poster board and a black marker and a wall, and write down what you want. You'll see it everyday, and that is a big change. Over time you are priming yourself, influencing yourself by changing your environment.

This typically breaks down because people can't do what you describe when they are angry. What about liberating from anger, so you don't have this classic perpetual marriage dilemma?

"Be like water" one of my favorites.

@Bob84 YES! Emotions are telling us so much. "So clear but so unheard".

be direct with your words and u will begin to think that way. an excercise would be to write "i want ________" over and over with different things u want. could be a big house, could be clarity. the excercise will get u focused on what you want vs thinking about the hows and whys and blah blah blah

thats a great post. thanks for that. it is asking a lot of someone to go from not knowing they can make decisions and effect their day to realizing they are God. you're right, just a big jump

stillness speaks is simple pure wisdom power of now is a little more instructional or contemporary

seperating from the ego is dropping beliefs. there is no substitute for meditation. put the horse before the cart regarding meditation and being too tired. i worked a full time job while i was in college full time and had two part time jobs on top of that, and i still meditated every morning. you can do it man. write it on the wall with a permanent marker.

To me, your strengths are only what you've got going so far. I think we can all develop what we want. Given the strengths you presently mention, accounting, computer analytics, the military, and actuarial come to mind. You certainly don't 'have' to be self employed or anything else to enjoy the path of PD or enlightenment, or whatever. I have a feeling about actuarial.