Nahm

@Prabhaker and it sounds like that is not what you desire...?

Living in America, I would say an attractive woman is one who is not petty, eats healthy and keeps in shape, does not victimize herself, doesn't have anxiety, doesn't have control issues, doesn't have daddy issues, doesn't have worthiness issues, doesn't have a closet drinking problem. Probably sounds like I'm setting the bar low, but American woman are in a pretty rough place right now. Slim pickins..

@Loreena I was asking in a literal sense. What do you mean when you say receiving love?

@Prabhaker Your introvert extrovert assessment is pretty off man. That makes me really curious, do you consider yourself to be an introvert or extrovert? Either way, a nice opportunity to let go of some beliefs. I hope you take that positively. One of my favorite things is discovering beliefs I can let go of. Liberation. @Revolutionary Think I love where you're headed. I often think 99% of vg's are just the same damn thing over and over. Why this media is not used for things like PD (for adults) is beyond me. Also, I think you're referring to Battlefield in your post....am I right? There's tons of research showing vg's are bad for the brain, and tons showing they are great for brain development (uncertainty). Myself, I believe they helped me with critical thinking, analytical thinking, team work, problem solving, etc. Then there's Minecraft..holy shit...anyone play that? Very creative family fun. Have you tried the PS4 VR yet? Way cool. Needs more games. If there was an action Buddhism / PD game for it, that would be the sheaaat.

Self honesty. Everything stems from this.

@Alex K You only have to be ok with now. It will only ever be now. If you need to eat differently and excercise, minimize the big picture to 1 or 2 tasks you can do right now. Perhaps plan it out now. Thinking about the future, or years from now is a slippery slope and this is where suffering enters the pictures. However, the answer is yes. I was very overweight 25 years ago, taking multiple depressions meds, terrible attitude, nothing helped and I made it worse by shitting on people who tried to help me. Then I started excercising and eating healthy, got in great shape and then very easily had a great attitude and outlook. I have never taken a medication since. So again, YES, the default, or baseline, or typical outlook / mode / attitude is drastically better. So much better in fact, that I couldn't have possibly comprehended it from where I was back then. The question about pleasure....no offense, but do you really care? Just start. Make how you feel the most important thing. Commit to it now. Down the road you will see there is a world of pleasures right in front of you that you never knew existed. Godspeed! If I can be of any help, you know where to find me!

@PureExp question about this seeker thing. Are you a seeker? If so, what is it you are seeking? If not, what is it you think others are seeking when you refers to them as seekers, that you have obtained and therefore are no longer seeking? Or were you never a seeker to begin with? Is it just a term to seperate? Just curious. Thanks! @Shin IME, it's very relative to all other things. What I eat, mindfulness, awareness, excercise, sex, negative or positive media, reading, etc. Allowance vs resistant thought is the biggest piece for me. I am typically in a state of equanimity. I meditate 30 -60 minutes every morning. I have noticed that resistant thought is the key variable. I couldn't sleep or meditate enough back in my days of resistant thought to obtain equanimity. Now, I sleep 5 hours and feel great - don't get tired. Just my 2 cents. Hope it's helpful. @Bob84 It's LRyan. The guy who's post this is. He's referring to his ego and or personality. @LRyan If you get to the state you want when you read, etc....and then drop out of that state within a few days, why not practice daily?

@Loreena ADmittedly a touchy subject, but please help me understand how we 'receive' love.

Is money earned?

When you learn that fire burns your hand, does it not become 'obvious'. Is it obvious that we feel based on our attitude?

Eating chocolate does not bring me pleasure. I understand it tastes good. I also understand how sugar effects my mind and mood, and so effects my life. I understand addiction and withdrawal. No thank you. "You need some money to exist, survive and sustain. Beyond that the money that you earn is only a number" I beg to differ. Personal development, growth and expansion can be done with no money, but can be done more enjoyably and efficiently with money. Money is not bad, attitude can be bad. An attitude that money is bad, or even useless, is the justification of the monkey ind itself. It does not benefit me to assume that someone with millions of dollars is "chasing" anything at all. I find it more accurate that they learned not to chase anything, which freed them from their fears, and directly led to them doing what they loved and thus they made a lot of money. How can the second half of what you said be true if the first half is true?

I am curious, who you have listened to, to get the idea that your mind can not be completely turned of at will. Zero monkey mind. It does take time. I think you and I must have very different connotations of 'expansion'. Is yours benefitting you? Desire does not bring suffering. Monkey mind creates attachment by repetitive worry, and thus suffering. When monkey mind is resolved, desire most assuredly does not equate to suffering. Escape the paradigm that obtaining something resolves desire and monkey mind. This will never work. Your rituals and commitment to practices resolve monkey mind. Let it be simple and apply acceptance. Do the practices, know they work for everyone without exception. It is the ego which that 'I'm the exception" traces back to. The very thing that is producing the 'me' monkey mind. With all the love - life is feeling EXACTLY like what you've been eating, doing, thinking. Change those and you change how you feel. thought, then emotion.

@Loreena I understand. What do you mean by luck? COuld you break that down for me like I'm 5? Always been fascinated by the minds application of luck and randomness. You rock Loreena!

@Callum A just love for you. and this is the unbelievable efficiency of this forum happy for you

@Callum A what led you to post it? Spot that. You're actually doing the thing your post is suggesting awareness of.

Books are great. Imagine the home / environment of someone who doesn't take the steps back. Would their kitchen be wrapped around healthy? Would the center of their environment be a TV or excercise equiptment, yoga mat, etc? Would they meditate daily and choose to maintain their higher state, even when hearing from someone going through 'problems"? Would they know the surest way to solve a problem, is to create it?

There is a discovery that you are nothing. IMO, this is where most people stop going deeper and start giving advice to others about how they can become nothing also. Some people keep going and discover that they are everything.

This sounds very backwards to me. SOunds like you are trying to experience love, etc from others, when it is within you to be experienced already.

Who is stopping you from doing anything you want?

So many extremes here. Is it not enough to feel good for the sake of feeling good. Just enough money to survive or a slave to money? What about traveling, experiencing new things, giving and helping others? You can certainly completely be rid of monkey mind. Then what will you do for continued expansion and development? Retreats? Vacations? New hobbies?

I don't know how long it will take, more than it has I guess. It could take a minute, it could take another year. It's up to you. It always has been. You can find happiness. The entirety of your experience of her, all happened in you. You're not going to go from where you are now to that kind of exhilaration in one day, but over time, you most definitly can feel like that again, without her or anyone.

@username Just give it time. Take your vitamins. Do fun stuff.

Enjoy all seasons