Nahm

@Revolutionary Think Yes. I agree with your assessment. There is a large scale movement underway with a few potential solutions; homeschooling, online schooling, charter (corporations) schools, etc. I meant it in a positive way for you. That the issues of the world play the role of fulfilling purpose for certain people. There will always be opportunities to make everything better. I commend your focus and efforts and wish you luck. The school system does need reform.

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I've done decades of ego removal and I have tried in recent years to take that to the personality level, it seems to me from my experience, that the personality is not removable.

@Scholar you can help someone else with their pain, but not their suffering. That is self inflicted, they must stop doing something to stop suffering (a belief, overthinking, keeping out of the now,etc) You can tell them how, but you can't help them to do it.

Have you heard the story of the disciple and carrying the spoon of oil? Mindfulness. Keep mindful of the silent backdrop, the underlying no sound. That all is illusion.

Like most emotion pain, there is a belief you hold that prevents you from seeing more accurately the mechanisms of the relationship. IMO it is the knowing you have of this inaccuracy, but the unawareness of it that leaves you with this deeper pain. You have probably ruled out that 'letting the past go' didn't help or 'fix it'. The belief would be that those emotions are coming from her/him.

You're wrestling with the nonphysical (mind). Stop. Make it physical. Make a dream / vision board, it works. Hang it where you see it everyday. In meditation, when thoughts arise, return your focus to your breathing, it works over time. Buy clothes that are the size you want to get to with your weight loss, and hang them where you will see them everyday. Watch videos about what you want.Whatch excercise videos. If you want to stop eating sugar, watch sugar documentaries, etc. This is all easier than how you've been going about it I think. Let it be easier. Good luck!!!

One additional idea, to the good stuff already suggested - It is easier to help a friend then ourselves. Do you have a friend that you could ask something like... "I'm stuck on this, what are you stuck on? I'll start for you what you're stuck on, and you for me"

What experiences have you had so far in income production? What do you know you don't want to do?

The ego is not static, it's plastic.

Just let go of the belief that some work is laborious, then do other work. You're expressing dissatisfaction with your limiting beliefs, so expand. There are many jobs.

@Vikram ss It's impossible to lose what you are. You've merely lost your focus.

@eskwire The whole show. You are the whole thing. You're the perceiver. The lens. The resolve is not within your brother or the world or the past. The resolve is within you right now. The resolve comes from letting go, not adding to. "The undercurrent" is something you created. There is no 'tool' to fix it. It must be let go of. Empty the ego, and love fills in.

@Echoes 'they' are observing, you are your whys. We are the patterns & laws. Many people, even enlightened people, have yet to realize what you are talking about / realizing right now. They project their beliefs unknowingly from ignorance. We all do. Where that line is, is actually up to each of us, since we are each the observer in the 'equation'. Many say 'there is no other', 'all is one', and they accept the paradigm of enlightenment, and therefore, never explore the paradigm of choice. Yes, I realize this is not a popular view. The ego loves nothing more than to say 'I've found the line' 'the final enlightenment'. There is no such thing, because we are the choice, the content of the choice, and the chosen. There is no such 'line'. Just choices. How can you be sure - it's inherent in the cycle or loop. You can observe people, and you can see that when you offer information that reveals to them a contradiction in their 'line' wisdom, their ego will be fuled and they become angry, or they will quietly refuse to assimilate that information, and bow out. The ego is comfy in it's line paradigm. Another observable facet of this....look through old threads, notice that they all end in this exact place. Choice denial.

Careful, the universe will only present you with more opportunity for connection. This is coming from you.

@Christian Ignorance is a very strong force. Try less, say less and you'll communicate more. Accept them genuinely, and in their expereince of your acceptance, they are awakened to their own discord and more aware it is not to be accepted.

Ego, separation. Oneness, connection.

There is this level of awaking to the dance. There is yet another level of awaking to the choice.

Sounds like expansion of observational beauty capacity. I think it's the same physiological experience as when you see something beautiful, and you get filled with an emotion that makes you hold back the tears. You are emptying ego and being filled by the love of the one. It's a great great thing. Keep breathing through it. Watch tear jerker videos and breath through the emotion (don't suppress). I think you'll soon be seeing an entirely new level of beauty in all things.

All science, religion, etc, is all analytics of the waking state.

@Mondsee Do breathe-through stretches while believing the stretches will free you of the 'pain', and it actually will.

Food beliefs are much deeper than personality beliefs. Either could be a viable course of solution though. There are ample examples of people who believed they were 'introverts' and then after cutting things like eating late, eating sugar, carbs, etc - then identify as extroverts.

Processed gran sugar is cocaine without nitrogen. If you eat sugar daily, I feel safe saying you can chalk up 99% of any undesirable emotion to it. Imagine a 4 day cycle a cocaine addict goes through. The craving, the high, the low, the withdrawal, the blame, the anger, the craving of resolve to the anger and blame, then the high again. What makes sugar addiction unbelievably hard compared to cocaine, is the widespread identification of this cycle with 'illegal' cocaine vs the widespread ignorance of the 'legal' sugar, Breaking the sugar addiction, on a positive note, with bring you insight to a paradigm of social denial. You'll have an increased compassion (I hope) because you'll be able to see how much suffering people unknowingly bring upon themselves with sugar. http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/sugar-has-similar-effect-on-brain-as-cocaine-a6980336.html http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-3412497/Sugar-new-crack-cocaine-Doctor-warns-growing-addiction-sweet-stuff-dangerous-drugs-alcohol.html

Great post! have you tried shakes with this stuff yet? https://www.amazon.com/Garden-Life-Organic-Greens-Protein/dp/B01A7N9KPK/ref=sr_1_2_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1489247712&sr=8-2&keywords=Raw%2Bchocolate%2Bmeal%2Bwith%2Bgreens&th=1

Congrats on your still aliveness.