Nahm

@mamad That God, Allah, is deceptive is a colossal misnomer.

@Thought Art In answer to your question, I see it literally, right in front of me, on my dreamboard, and then in the flesh. Concepts are great too, not knockin em, I just love seeing this being that, or is it that being this. (Vs future) Dunno really. Doesn’t seem to actually matter, in the sense there is really neither a dreamboard nor a flesh.

@Thought Art Amen. ?? It’s all interpretation. When I see a heart, I see two which unify into a pointing below two, back to that which appears as two… when I see maslow’s pyramid, self actualization is what it points upwards to, or, that which that which is pointed to, Is.

Great question! Who could do that though? You? How can you drive to where your car is? How can you walk to where you’re standing? If you seek the definition, google it. If you seek the connotation, you’re already experiencing it. Inherently then, it seems to be whatever you believe it is, for you. Yet, evidenced by the question (healthy, and you should be questioning in such case imo) the knowing of what these are is not present.

Perhaps the greatest realization that could come from therapy is the distinction between one’s thought of what a thing is or will be like, and the actuality of the direct experience.

@Thought Art Self actualization is a goal? Who’s?

The means of taking life for granted is not recognizing you don’t actually know what you’re talking about. You don’t have a clue what life is. The means of taking yourself for granted is not recognizing you don’t actually know what you’re talking about. You don’t have a clue what you are. You have nothing. Your parents have much. You take them for granted because again, you believe you know what they are. You do not have a clue what they are. That you have everything you want in life is a belief. You’re experiencing jealousy, which reveals what you actually want, but you’re suppressing emotion because again, you don’t know what it is. You have no clue, what emotion actually is. You have no clue what you actually want. Making a dreamboard makes this incredibly easy in the most literally right in front of you manor. This is like a cycle. Because you don’t know what guilt is, you identify by it, you firmly believe it’s about you. Then at some inevitable point, certain thoughts cease, and there is no longer the experience of discord. “After the guilt”, is actually “when I am no longer focusing on thoughts x, y or z”. Again, because you don’t know what you’re talking about yet firmly believe you do, you weave the belief that a you feels a happy. Presently, in accordance with your experience, the clouds are always present, and it is the clear sky which comes and goes. This changes meditatively. There is nothing being forgotten. There is nothing being veiled by the thought activity. But this is being ignored. Not purposefully, not deceptively, absolute innocently. Why would anyone desire to justify guilt? The emotional scale is very helpful for understanding the emotions you experience. There is no implication here that you should already know anything you don’t, or that you are doing anything wrong, or going about anything the wrong way. There is only the message, the end of suffering.

@Moksha ?

Survival of the fittest.

Contingent on what “pick up” means to you. It’s connotational. Imo, drop the term altogether. Objects can be picked up. Maybe you seek an object, maybe you seek more. There is no such thing as “the true thought”. If you want to know what a woman is seeking, simply ask. Conversationally of course, for the fun of the experience, not point blank. Consider, are you looking for a relationship or just sex. You are experiencing what you’re looking for in all cases. Do you enjoy being deceived? If you are to be influenced, raise the bar in terms of what / who resonates. Imo, let the “win” perspective go and abide in good conscience. Having sex isn’t “winning”. It could, but it’s very short term. Inevitably said man realizes value is a facade and self referential thought deludes. Talk to her. Find out. She’s like you. Sometimes wants wild and crazy monkey sex. Sometimes what’s a hug. Sometimes wants to talk. Etc. Go about it lightly, with no need whatsoever for sex. If that’s difficult, be aware of reaction to thoughts, by relaxing and witnessing the reaction, without reacting. Freely explore not attempting to feel better by fulfilling impulses. It’d be easier, effortless, imo, to just drop the lens of “pick up” altogether. If the lens of objectivity is employed, then indeed the need for confidence arises. But if there is no con employed, there is no con employed.

Before you get to what people say or think, how does acting stupid and silly feel for you? Maybe the discord is there, and not as related to what other people say or think. ‘Fresh start’ is not a property of a place or situation, but of letting limiting beliefs go. Hence the insight of the old saying, ‘wherever you go, there you are’. We can bring our beliefs anywhere. Don’t ‘take it in’. See that it is theirs. Also an old insightful saying, ‘sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me’.

@Charlotte Yay. For. You. ? As well, apply to any arising thought, of which there seems to be the experience of, fear. Works amazingly, but, you didn’t hear that from me.

Being a separate self is content, thought. The sense is not of there being a separate self, the sense is precisely revealing of the discord of the belief. Perfectly revealing. As in, to the degree there are beliefs in being separate, there is the discord of said beliefs / thought activity. More thought activity therefore will not do, but relaxation, meditation, the letting go of said beliefs and thought activity, will do, yet of course, these are not ‘doings’. There indeed is the experience of conditioning, but there is no actual experience of your conditioning. That is the conditioning, that is the discordant belief. “It” can be pointed at btw. “It” is the thoughts: “the ego”, “your”, and “it”. There are no things there. There are only those thoughts ‘there’. @OneHandClap Chinese finger trap. Priceless analogy! ?

Yes, absolutely. At a point the judgements & motives are realized to be ‘yours’ so to speak, not objective, collective or someone else’s. ‘Inner work’ is letting those discordant perspectives go. Inner work brings up that seemingly missing unsaid piece, what the motive is, why you feel it’s unjust, precisely why it doesn’t resonate, how the motive was created in an effort to understand emotion / feel better, how it doesn’t pan out, and then what inspiration is / why it feels as it does, unfettered by the judgements and motive(s). It helps one realize why one was desiring to transcend physical sexual attraction in the first place, and how & why it became seen as a problem. Anyone isn’t relevant. How you see things, or, experience, is relevant. If people are judged, who’s judging? Have you ever actually seen judgement, or only experienced it, as thoughts and beliefs?

It’s awesome. Makes everything so much easier.

What is really desired, is to feel amazing. Because you are the feeling of amazing, the ‘way’ is letting all beliefs to the contrary go. These beliefs are easier to spot than you might think, because you feel the discord each time they arise. And again, what you really want, is to feel amazing. Some beliefs, don’t. As they say, first ‘empty your cup’. These beliefs seem pretty tightly wound and adhered to. Meditation every morning unwinds. You can also consider the very opposite of each belief, and its easiest to do this on paper so you can visually see what’s being thought & believed. The emotional scale is a very helpful tool as experiences like doubt are more clearly realized to be, experienced, vs indicative of or about you. Give meditation and the emotional scale a couple months, then reconsider this inquiry of this thread. Without the beliefs being quite so, believed, and with mental & emotional equanimity, you might find you don’t even have these questions anymore. If you experience any tension of emotional discomfort which arise as you relax into meditation, talk with someone to express what arises, or use an expression journal. The key is allowing whatever arises to be honored, expressed and understood.

@BenG And here we are.

Love. If it were a state, it’d be like a state of exuberance & disbelief of winning the mega millions, but unending, perpetual, completely impossible and yet all encompassing, and of course love rather than money or things. If it were an attribute, it’d be unimaginably pure absolute innocence. If it were a facet, it’d be facetlessness. If it were a catalyst, it’d mystify all things, thoughts, perspectives, ideas, creations, dreams, beings and relationships. If it were deconstructive, it’d demystify all things, thoughts, perspectives, ideas, creations, dreams, beings and relationships. If it were convincing, it’d be that you are awesome no matter what arises, even if what arises is that you aren’t awesome, it is obvious that arises in that you are awesome. If it were situational, it’d be that it is impossible to share, while it is impossible not to share. If it were perplexed it’d make sense, if it made sense it’d be perplexed. But no one actually knows what enlightenment or awakening feels like.

@Moksha ?

Nothing’s funnier than meditation.

@7thLetter ??? Awesome! Therapy’s a great idea. I’d go there and empty / express everything. Any worries, fears, weights, concerns, gripes, etc. Go there, empty it there, and leave it all there. HEALING OF TRAUMA IS THE PATH! I’d continue taking a break. But also, things are working perfectly. Meditation calms the mind, the body mind starts emptying, and meditation is often set aside for a while. If the question was why, the best answer would be to talk with a therapist. It’s all ‘working’ so to speak. I hope you can see / feel some of that. You’re doing great man. Keep your head up!

It’ll always be something else, until it’s thought attachment, meditation, and expression. A mind ungrounded in it’s source is an extremely rogue & defiant way to go about co-creating your life. Lots of things are tried in the effort to circumvent the aversion from feeling, while only feeling, only the source, only you, will do. Attached to thoughts, identified with the body, tattoos are an effort to feel better from how you look. If you don’t know if it’s linked to trauma, it is. Therapy, healing modalities, practices, expression journaling, etc, these do work very well. You are most definitely not alone in this, there is no such thing as a human without trauma. You’re experiencing 99% thoughts about yourself, and 1% your actual self, and none of the thoughts are actually true. Not a single one. The path changes all of that. Flips it entirely. The thought activity is - in & of itself - the veiling. Very literally, you keep focusing on these thoughts, they keep arising, and it gets nowhere. A solution will never be found in thought, because there is no problem. You’re fine. Your life is fine. Your bodymind is fine. That belief that something is wrong is what can be let go. That belief is from having identified with experience (likely a trauma), and or related to sexuality. Only in letting go, in deep relaxation, in meditative practices, is there the peace of mind, clarity and creativity you’re desiring. There was experience in your life that was akin to eating something which did not agree with you / your stomach. The bodymind has been trying to release (barf it out) it all along. If the suffering is sexuality or gender orientation related, there might be self judgement and or worrying about being judged going on. And it might have been going on for so long you adapted to it, leaving you perplexed. But again, meditation and expression are the way. Harming yourself or anyone is not the way. For a megadose of alignment, grounding, and reconnection, spend ample time away from screens and the 10,000 things, in nature. If spending time in nature is or sounds foreign to you, connect the dots.

Can you feel contentment right now? Letting past and future go, letting conditions held as to how anything needs to be different for you to feel contentment go, just for this moment? Emotion doesn’t need a response per se, it is the response.

@Jakuchu Simmer.

6 - 7 hours… 15 mins. Classy