Nahm

@fridjonk I hear you there. It’s kinda crazy, but funny. Crazy-funny I guess. Any modalities that have “clicked” with you? @Raptorsin7 The deliciousness of synchronicity indeed. Love it! I know reiki & psychedelics resonated with you, any others so far? Any insight you’d give to ‘one of those critics’, those who have yet to experience directly, the healings?

@Nadosa Because the brain does not produce intelligence, intuition, feeling, nor love. Another way to point... if you are asking, you can be practicing. A day comes when there is no question, and no practice. Yes, ‘that day’ is now. Is it conceptual, or otherwise, might be a good consideration.

You already see how a duality is being created in thought to ‘sneak around’ practices. Yes, definitely both. And 1 on 1 guidance, and as many healing modalities as you are open minded enough to try.

Self-love, “dead” or “alive”. “It's all the same, only the names will change - (Yet) every day, it seems we're wasting away”

@lostmedstudent If you inspect that frustration, you’ll find an underlying belief about yourself, one that does not feel good because it is not true about you. One that did not feel good the first time you believed it, and still does not. Having worked through that belief and seeing the falsity of it, there will be less monkey mind and inherently then, natural focus. You’ll find the reason you can orgasm alone easier than with someone else, is due to monkey mind / overthinking of what people think of you, which is to say, your own self judgment is stuck on ‘repeat’. Need to be more, ‘shuffle’. This will change that ‘got bored of each new thing’ issue. You can change the things, and it can work for a time. But when you change, well, that’s orgasmic. For any arguments which ensue, simply stay at the realization, that you both want the same thing.

Acceptance and understanding are you. Just as a thought can be experienced as you, or as the content of the thought. Actuality, and experientially. You, Love, never moved, never ‘went’ anywhere. So you, love, are ever-present. This is why some thoughts feel good (aligned with you, love)...and some thoughts do not feel good (in discord with you, love). Dream board, thought & feeling aligned...’creating the life you actually want’. Because you created this and am this already, the inward path, is actually (from this relative experiential vantage point)...backwards. Takes a minute to ‘wrap your head around’, but when you do, things start making a whole lot of really, really great...sense. ‘Take it to’ subtle town. Notice the feeling difference between, for example....the one who accepts, the one who understands...to the very plain & ordinary obviousness that....acceptance is within you, understanding is within you. Let this be in the plain sight as it already is. You are aware of these, within you. This is already the vantage point, already the case. Nothing is ‘wrong with’ ‘this equation’. That thought does not feel good. Inspecting that thought/feeling alignment...is picking up the breadcrumb on the path back home. Due to the ‘backwards’ fact of ‘the path’....there is seemingly many, many “traps” such as “I am the understander”. Creation...outward movement. The Path...inward movement. How can you believe it? You’d be creating the belief.

@Endangered-EGO Very nice!

@tsuki Awesome, great to hear! No, but the first few times you use it, it’s really helpful to have written the thought down. When you come across an emotion that releases, it’s easy to return to the scale, and work that thought to the top. Heck ya. Sounds like self honesty to me. Careful not to be critical...but we can also clean our thoughts up a bit more...I’d think of it as how I feel right now, rather than “I’m lower on”. It’s about working one thought up the scale. Overtime this changes, aligns...thought & feeling. “It seems like all of these emotions on the scale are actually love, but this love is covered up with thought stories/delusion to create all the other feelings all the way down to fear. Is this description accurate?” Yes.....I would explain it as Love is the absolute basis of all that is...and so love is the absolute basis of feeling (the wifi which is Everywhere, or ‘that there is sensation’....from there....sensation (Love) + thought = emotion. We just slow down and have a look at things, and see that we create emotion right under our noses. But now, we do it on purpose. We become conscious of what we were ‘going unconscious’ of before....and we can do it on purpose, with the life we want to life in mind, one thought at a time, and the quality of relationships we want to have in mind, one thought at a time. Yes. Notice, this is already the case. It’s less about “doing this new thing”, and much more noticing how this reality has been ‘working’ all along. Feeling let’s us know, as creators, how each thought resonates or doesn’t with our source, love. Aligned - we can ‘stand up next to a mountain, and chop it down, with the edge of our hands’. Jimi knew this well...and was, ‘bold as love’. YES. Such is the reference....would you rather be right, or feel great? A flexible, liquid mind. Thoughts come, thoughts go, no problem...because I understand, I’m conscious of how the thought feels, and I can use that scale anytime. In short, it’s cause I’m as handsome as those bean muffins. I think you’re right on...anytime you question anything from the basis of....”how am I attracting this?” ”Explaining things”....no problem when the thought and feeling aligns. Thought becomes DELIGHTFUL. Creating! It’s always been that way. The scale is for working one thought. If you have a ‘not good feeling thought’ about someone else, work the thought up the scale. (Not the person). Great to hear all the ‘clicking’ into place.

@Dragonfly210 That’s it! @Consilience ♥️

@Sizeable Oof You might consider, rather than how fast you can get somewhere, how did you get, here? You already went through the looking glass, but it’s such a mind bender, that you don’t even realize you did.

‘Love’ isn’t good enough?

Can’t really be ‘on conscious’ if you’re aware (conscious) of it. I actually read the report, and was wondering what you found concerning as I found it to be favorable to psych’s. Nonetheless, I believe users here would comment honestly, just to help you with any concerns. Aside...you actually don’t know how anyone else thinks. I get it, it seems like it, but it’s actually what you think about how people think. You also don’t know how anyone else feels, that’s still what you think about how other people feel. Also, I don’t find this post to be “selfish and dumb” at all. It’s good to know what the heck one is doing with ‘one’s brain’. Feeling better is a pretty easy take away here...and also if you read the report. @Serotoninluv Very insightful getting your take on that info. Much appreciated.

@Llight What is the specific concern you are finding on the reports? It might be more productive for folks to weigh in on that with their direct experience.

@tsuki Amen brother. this scale is so useful. If you’re interested, write down the thought on paper, with brevity. Then ask, how do I feel about that thought? (Anger) Then express it. Be fucking angry, it’s ok, it’s natural. Then ask, can I feel that I am discouraged? Then express that feeling about it. Then ask, can I feel blame? Hell ya I can, lots of people did lots of terrible thoughtless stuff. Indeed this is their fault. Then, do I feel worry about this? Etc. As you ‘work the thought up the scale’, keeping the focus on expressing, on feeling....you literally experience that “locked into anger” perspective...actually was Joy/Love the whole time. If I can help, I’m happy to. Want the best for ya man. Been there, and it’s no fun.

Without imposing duality, there is just, Joy. The flu example implies another duality & I agree with you, it doesn’t make sense. Your “right” is only that. Psychiatry also has a proven record of not actually helping, and causing side effects and other ‘damages’. Marital counseling has a proven track record of putting the practitioner’s score keeping / reputation (keeping them married) ahead of the well being of the individuals.....is that opinion “right”? “Using all resources available”....how do you know that there was nothing helpful in a resource you ruled out, without directly experiencing it? That seems to be required to sustain the belief an opinion, is more absolutely, “right”....the very ’thing‘ to be seen through, the suffering of the righteousness. Bombs are dropped on kids, literally, because it’s “the right thing to do” (one person’s opinion). Sounds like you are at that point, “getting the joke”, already. It is wonderful to hear that you are happy on a consistent basis and that your life is headed in the direction that you want.

The beauty of their message, the helpfulness, is that there is no intention whatsoever of it being helpful.

@Ibn Sina In your love, rather than judgment for him, there’s no problem at all. Look at Eckart Tolle and Jim Carrey. Even just Jim Carrey, fantastic example. The silence and the noise are the same. We are all each other‘s entertainment, there’s no use denying it. Even the denial of this, is entertaining to some.

In essence I’m trying to convey that everything ‘needed’ for any of what you’re going through is readily apparent, here & now, in plain sight. References to the true self, love, infallible. Reference to a “subconscious”, and any other write off, or ‘puzzle pieces on the other side of that wall’, ‘in the past’, what is not present....I’d really scrutinize that line of one-at-a-time, unrelated-to-each-other, thoughts...as well as anything in thought which is resistant to the infinite intelligence that the body is, emptying itself.

@billiesimon “Psychedelics” is a seemingly unique word, as it’s intention it to label something and reveal it does not actually exist, much like “firmament”. The “breakdown” you’re looking for would lead to prior to you which is looking for the breakdown.

Write down whatever is on your mind. See that it sustains this impatience, this rushed, hurried ness, which results in a boredom, having reduced this experience to a means to an end, over and over. Play it ALL the way out. Think that which hurries you now, all the way out into death. What was the point? What is there actually to worry about? Is there?

In light of what was previously said....you didn’t have to view it this way. Perspective is not rigid, it’s spontaneous, it’s creation, which is only now. That perspective you expressed is almost entirely through a separate self perspective, which then of course, appears to “need to be defended”. This won’t ever feel aligned, because it’s just to off from the truth of who you are. “You” did not see it, that way, sans first a layer of believing you are the separate self. But that idea, being defended, is not actually you. Pride, in this separative manor, is an extremely sneaky suffering. Have you not witnessed this on the forum a thousand times? Perhaps you did, yet still, unsatisfied. Perhaps compassion is being looked for, without, yet is only found, within. If you believe this is true, and refuse to open up to perspectives in accordance with your own feeling....are you surprised no one can ‘get in there’ and do it for you? In recognizing you created that, liberation, the possibility for a different choice, arises.

Does it strike you as completely nuts, when I say that what you actually most want, is to love the cleaning of that kitchen, and the loving of the selflessness and uncondition, the now-ness, of doing so? The nuttier that sounds, the more it is drawing out the thought story, the underlying misunderstanding and misalignment, which is ‘feeding’ or perpetuating the anger, which would be the natural response to his, especially repeated over and over. Understanding of how one is creating emotion is key to this, as is the understanding of how thought, feeling and source ‘align’ (are already aligned / recognizing the discord between them). Without seeing clearly the relationship between thought and creating reality, it all remains circular suffering. One way to say this, in lieu of actually having a discussion together...if you had one day left to live, would you spend it in therapy? If not, what would you do? And more importantly, why. That kitchen would look, a bit, different. Given my assumption she too has some similar misunderstanding of self, her ‘unresolveds’ and yours would just keep each other’s going. A push & pull mess the therapist might be adding to, rather than inspecting and dispelling. Another way to say this, you’re experiencing a thought loop, which is only ‘broken’ or ‘ended’, with feeling, and I’m assuming she is too, and it seems they are intermingled to the point of appearing to not be contingent upon the other, or at the very least, having something to do with eachother, which they don’t. Hard to say. Keep in mind, McDonalds is not in the business of making healthy nutritious food, they’re in the business of making money. I’m also assuming the therapist doesn’t see this in themself, and so doesn’t see it in other people, and so is only working at the thought level, trying to resolve thinking with more thinking, mistaking a thought about the past, for the (feeling wise) past. This can be helpful, but can also be, in a way, keeping someone stuck via their own ignorance (the therapist’s). Thought attracts. Vibration attracts. Birds of a feather flock together. Is it odd to consider that someone commenting on this thread, in a manor of ‘speaking for you’, can not resist doing so, as they are defending their position, vicariously through your situation? This is attraction at work, which is always one’s own. @TheGreekSeeker Not tryin to rip on ya. If the ‘pride & guilt’ misunderstanding initially stings a bit, the healing is found precisely in the understanding of the nature of the sting. To say this lightly as a pointer, thinking & feeling have a ‘disconnect’ with one another, and also a ‘disconnect’ with their source, which is truth, they literally are. Aligned, none of what you’re sharing could possibly continue, as it only ‘transpires’ at the low end of the emotional scale and how it relates directly with the rest of the scale. The suffering would be seen coming a million miles away (in feeling), well before I create it. The therapist is likely attempting to understand (and help you guys understand) experience / circumstances / behavior, with references to experience / circumstances & behavior. It sounds overly reductionist for me to say in one way, but that’s no more than thought loops, which ever so suddenly become a dogma, a ‘group think’, (attraction at play). If the therapist was aware you’re each creating your own reality, feeling would unequivocally come first, as it is that which all else appears from,, with experience of outside circumstances, and behaviors, a distant second. If reality is unfolding via ‘next thought chosen’, and this is not seen, this single factor makes an enormous difference on how this (or anything) will go. Creating now, with the mindset still heavily influenced by ‘past thinking’, is fundamentally ‘asleep’. In seeing this, suddenly then, ‘where this thought is going’, seems very obvious, and very malleable, in the seeing of the thoughts’ relationship with feeling. Keep in mind, I only have what you’re saying to work with here, your recap of things. I hope the comments are of use, but it’s like commenting on someone’s life story only having a newspaper clipping to work with, while knowing the clipping doesn’t have any influence at all (yet acknowledging it sure seems like it does...because of the lack of proper inspection of one’s self.) “She can't speak English, I would have to translate it for her.” Use google translator or any similar tool. You greatly underestimate the important of her healing and understanding, not coming from you in any way. No offense, this is just very important to start seeing. “I see that these two are connected because the root of this anger is fear and it was instilled in the past. I/the wounded child was abandoned emotionally and this part of me lives in fear and protects itself by swallowing all of the inner space when threatened. When it does, there is no detachment from feelings or thoughts like it is right now.” “This part is tricky for me. The "wounded child" story comes from our couple's therapist and it definitely relates to the past. However, for me, experientially, it is directed from the present moment towards the future, as in: "I can't keep living like this", "it's too much!" or "if we keep going in this direction, we're gonna crash", etc. The root is not fear. The root is love. The ignorance that the root is love, is creating of “fear”. If the therapist is unaware of this, they’re literally enabling via the creating of more ignorance, more fear. If I believe the root is fear, everything I could say afterwards, about it, is from the place of my own delusion - ‘my own fear’ / ignorance. It’s very understandable how this could be bringing the majority of the confusion. Notice how different it reads, when we put the one part before the other. Using the past & future, which are not actual, other than as actual content of thoughts, arising now, keeps a whole lot of thought stories about separate selves at play, and actually prevents, suppresses, the release & healing. It keeps the focus on addressing a story that is literally being made up, right now, about a “past”. A story of fear, ignorance and suffering, via a “divided self”. You might say, the beginning of the recognition of the thought story I’ve been telling about myself, is the beginning of actual healing from within, of, who I actually am. Where does the therapist think this healing comes from? The therapist? Eachother? I can only assume given their training that their overall intention is your expression, release & lasting clarity, but it’s such a convoluted ass backwards way of trying to arrive at actuality. I wonder if in the conversations, what is plain is what is talked about. By that, I mean that the feeling resonance of an arising thought now, is here and now in plain experience to be looked at and discussed, that they feeling or rather the misunderstanding of feeling, can be understood. If a thought about the past, is taken, in terms of how the thought feels, to be actually the past, then one is trying to “feel in the past”, which will obviously never add up, because feeling is only ever, now. This approach stands to take you so “out of the now”, that even doing dishes is experienced as a micro nightmare. The better feeling, the feeling that is healing, the understanding or higher intelligence...arise literally within feeling. But, this means no more thought story about me, no matter what Any “authority”, and or, ....in spite of the sneakiness others may be asleep within. I’m not saying one shouldn’t talk about and understand one’s past, but that the ultimate answer to feeling better, is directly addressing feeling, how it works, with thoughts, and who you really are. A note which might be helpful for you... If anyone else is reading this, and feels ”triggered”, rather than assuming it’s because ”Nahm” is a __________, simply have a look at the feeling itself. Express it, feel it, understand it’s message. I’t message is The Message, not “me”.

@tsuki Sorry to hear that man. I had some thoughts on a couple other things in your response, but if and when the time is right HMU. Love & healing to you brother, I hope there’s clarity and relief for both of you asap.

Swallow what?

This is kind of a hunch, but I suspect, that you have an underlying belief, or really, an expectation, that first someone else must think like you do....then they can communicate with you. This is often referred to (if you want to google and read about it)....as “needing to be understood”. That is the single biggest relationship killer there is, because of it’s underlying falsity. And speaking only on your behalf, it’s so taxing. It’s like carrying 100 lbs of armor with you, everywhere you go. Mentally, this is exhausting, because rather than just experiencing the one thought at a time simplicity of living, a whole construct “must” be employed, just for anyone to talk with you. It’s heavy suffering, indicative of a history of suppressing, rather than releasing.