Nahm

Just stopping by to share two things, lots of love, and that helpless & anxiety are conceptual. Not emotions. For the win, understand what you are feeling, vs believing the conceptualizations you’ve been believing. Ok three things, believing the conceptualizations vs understanding what you’re feeling can most often support a hypochondriac like mindset of one way or another “something’s wrong with me” which “needs to be fixed”. This mindset (imo from what I’ve seen - not specific to you) results in dis ease, and therein, getting sick / illnesses a lot. I love you please don’t throw anything at me. ? We are in a time when our immune systems and well being are paramount, that’s where I’m coming from and hope that’s how it’s received.

Have fun everywhere you go, everywhere you are, not least of which when you’re alone. Has nothing to do with other people or specific locations or environments. Fun is greater than all of these. There is no fun anywhere without you bringing it. Imo, don’t do anything, don’t be tryna add anything. Just have fun. If there is resistance, its self referential thoughts, which are resolved by understanding the emotions you are experiencing. As a bonus, everyone at every party is also experiencing these ‘pesky’ emotions. There is much much connectivity and inclusiveness inherent in understanding emotions. Much more is ‘seen’ and much relaxation ensues with much understanding.

Ok with who you sneaky devil! Isn’t the real interest why they don’t call again & what can be done about this?

This is what I’d call ‘Basic’ meditation. It’s pretty much what you describe. Two cents, if one isn’t able to sit with a straight spine, however one can sit or lie down will do, but if one can it is worthwhile. Inevitably the body starts emptying and any symmetry is ideal for this. Similar to body loads & releases in trips, and standing with arms out stretched, shoulders rolled back, palms open, etc. But in terms of cessation, the returning of attention to feeling breathing from the stomach is imo the way to go.

???

A high quality man is good for “politicians”.

God bless ya. ??❤️

‘Deep rooted issues’ is a concept, a thought, which arises only now. That isn’t feeling, that is an interpretation. Feeling is now, and is of the interpretation. You are not feeling a past, you are feeling your own interpretation. That also is a concept, a thought, which arises now or not at all. What you want is to feel amazing all the time, and you can. The interpretation, which you believe is true, specifically about you, actually isn’t. This is why it feels discordant, to you. The feeling amazing you seek is present now, and only now. As you mentioned, you tried getting it from everyone and everything, and that did not pan out. This is because you are the source of feeling amazing. Like a cork held underwater and let go, amazing feeling arises of it’s own natural accord. This is not something you can do. You must learn how to ‘get out of your own way’, and feel that the cork, the true nature, arises within naturally. To ‘get out of your own way’, is to let the habit of conceptualizing go, and understand the emotions you are actually feeling & experiencing. The emotional scale. The old habitual conceptualizing will arise, simply focus again on the emotional scale. Express each emotion simply & earnestly. It is not complicated, there is no ‘big aha’. Each higher emotion feels a bit better, and momentum builds as you go up the scale. When you’ve expressed each emotion up to contentment, you’ve let the cork go. If you aren’t truly feeling at peace with this moment as it is (contentment), honor and express what you are thinking and feeling, and go to that emotion on the scale, and proceed upward again. Then the cork naturally arises as hopefulness, because (from the direct experience of using the scale) it is now realized you can use this scale anytime you want. In going forward with your life, this is good to know because there will be challenges, there will be difficulties. But - there will be the scale, which you can use to help you ‘empty’ by expressing, and thus feeling, contentment. You can do this anytime you want. This makes the outlook, thoughts of the future, optimistic by default, and you feel eagerness in knowing this, and joy and freedom in experiencing this.

Keep inspecting.

Be knowing what you are wanting, and be getting ready for it (her or him) to show up.

The more the emotion of doubt is understood the less there is doubt or that “it”. (There is no “it”. “It” is the experience of the emotion of doubt.) Beliefs in the way will empty. You can’t see this because you have not the direct experience. Yet, I hope. ??

‘Hope’, ‘Life isn’t magical’ & ‘helplessness’ are concepts, not feeling(s). The feeling would be in regard to how those thoughts feel. The help, hope, and magic, would be in noticing this.

Not sure what you are talking about there. But you don’t know that. You think or belief that. You don’t really know. They might think or believe that, but there is no actual direct experience of it. Nonetheless, that’s a great orientation though. It sheds light on what you really want, which is not to be understood, but the feeling of being understood. You could inspect that. Is there a ‘feeling of being understood’, or is there the thought of being understood, which feels good? That ‘seeing eye to eye’ very likely involved expressing, and not expecting.

@Happy Lizard Sorry… I should’ve said human race, or mankind.

@Vibroverse Oh then yes, thanks. Indeed. This is infinity.

Therapy isn’t confusing. It’s for expression. Therapy is experienced as confusing, like any other relationship, by trying to make people do anything. Doubly confusing, if the trying to make people do anything is really, so you can feel better. Doubly, as in, expressing in therapy is the very means to feeling better. Therapy isn’t about the therapist understanding you, it’s more about you understanding yourself, so to speak. There has never been and never will be one understood by their parents. It’s impossible.

Idk what ouroboros means, but yes, there’s consciousness appearing as the thought objects. There’s no objects.

@Happy Lizard Not “shame for the human to win”. The human race ‘win’ is, no more shame.

@StarStruck “My intellectualization” is one thought. One thought, repeatedly believed, a belief. It is like armor, or a protective mask which seems to hide judgment of this that he she it me etc. But it doesn’t. The discord of judgement is felt every time the thought(s) is focused upon. Your discord isn’t someone else’s problem. This is not possible because ‘problem’ is no more than one thought you as awareness experiences. Intellectual, judgement, and problem, are beliefs. The root belief so to speak, is value. Entwined with the belief, ‘identity’. The last person in the whole world one should manipulate imo, is their therapist. Kudo’s for seeing one though. Many don’t get that far so to speak, in letting go. There is nothing wrong with you. Therein, there is nothing which stands to be beneficial from ‘someone understanding you’. It amounts to “agree with what is discordant for me”, which equals not letting it (whatever is discordant) go. Source already and has always understood you. That is all which could ever truly be said to be needed. Already. Two cents… next therapist you see, don’t walk out with that belief. Committ to not leaving there without having emptied entirely of that discord.

Un-secrecy, un-suppression, un-value, un-purpose, un-meaning = un-shame for the human win.

You have to believe the very first thought (in separation), to then believe the “outcome” “true result” “right”. Imagine what you’re describing is seen in a movie. All of it would therefore not be actual, but of the movie. Similarly, thoughts. If you typed your op word for word backwards, it’s equally as true, or right. See the ‘depth’ of justification?

I’d put how you feel right now, and how and what you are consciously creating right now, first. Sounds like your life purpose has become a condition, a contingency, upon this right now happiness. Sounds like it is also being used to create discord with your family, whereas without that pressure expression & communication might be easier, and feel more readily available, less triggering. “I’ll be happier when…”. That when never comes. Thoughts about feeling in a future are false. Feeling is always & only ever now. All thoughts about, arise only ever, now. Happiness is always now. Clarity (in regard to what you want to create) therein. I’ll be happy once I attain x, y, or z. Don’t let your whole life go by in that concept. What you want can simply be, what you want. You can have it, be it and experience it, without any unneeded pressure upon yourself of a purpose.

You’re missing that your expression in response to her asking about how you feel is what is groundbreaking for you experientially. Expressing has brought up a deeper belief, about woman, and the belief in “problems”, which resolves in feeling, or, understanding the emotions ‘behind’ the continued holding of the beliefs. This is being projected onto her, and really onto woman in general. Notice the conflict in perspectives, you could solve your problems too, and you can definitely let go of the perspective there are problems too. Problems & solutions are thoughts. Thought does not resolve thought such that the result is feeling better. That is rumination. Emotional expression does. I’d look for a therapist who can help you see the conflicting perspectives more clearly, and who can help you to express more deeply & understand the emotions. (Not go round & round with you in thought(s)).

This is belief, that there is a you or ‘separate self’ in the body, which could leave the body. Again, I’m not against psychedelics, but this is a belief, the activity of thought. I’m all for responsible breakthroughs trips, but the thought activity will resume until meditatively addressed. If there were a magic pill, I’d (and many, many other people so to speak) be handing it out all day everyday. As well, nothing taken personally I hope.

@BipolarGrowth I don’t think you mean to, and I think it’s a yet seen having bought into authority & conjecture therein, but you’re kind of (dangerously imo) glorifying the falsity of awakening”s” primarily via the conjecture / belief in “levels”. (Not in regard to you if you will, but generally speaking…) It is not a triumph or achievement to do such little introspection & honest expression, that one requires ‘hundreds of awakenings’. This is misinformation in regard to awakening, as these are substance experiences, which do not increase “one’s levels”, “baseline consciousness”, or “add up” to being anything other than aversion, thought attachment, or, monkey mind (as in you are not your thoughts / you are not a monkey). Of course, this is just an observation & opinion. Nothing personal meant whatsoever. In this view if you will, this is all unchecked ambition brought into spirituality as if there were a competition or something. Much love for ya here & I hope you know & feel that as Well.