Nahm

@JohnD Babies can’t walk. We can.

Toxicity doesn’t ‘work’ the way you’ve mislead yourself to believe. A mind confined as such would not recognize it if the entire universe weaved of itself the greatest possible gift for itself. The utilizing & clinging to this falsity is fear. Fear is the avoidance of feeling. This is like vacuuming the floor, not even noticing it’s not plugged in, and assuming it’s the vacuum’s fault that vacuuming is not possible. This is like believing “we are unable to interact in a healthy way”, and missing you’re creating that belief. The belief is there is toxicity, and other people are toxic. The truth is you are the source, and there is no toxicity, just the occasional innocent judgement. It is good that there is feeling, so this is readily recognized. These are the words of an awakened being. By awakened, I mean one who recognizes the distinction between conceptualization & direct experience, and as such is a source of wisdom. If I were you, I’d spend a day reading this: “Why not use that as clarification to be the Dad you wish you would've had? You don't have to sacrifice or give up any of your life dreams for your kid. Don't use your life dreams as an excuse to skip out on your kid and don't use your kid as an excuse to skip out on your life dreams. Either option is fear talking and making excuses. The kid might help you clarify the shit out of your life plans though. It might seem like you're making sacrifices. You've been given a gift. You can have your cake and eat it too. Really. You cannot ruin anyone else's life without their permission. Let yourself off the hook, drop this fear and then you'll be free to act from the heart. Also likewise your ex and her influence cannot effect you without you giving it permission. Is it easier to cut someone off so we aren't affected by them? It seems that way in the short term but that's only kicking the can down the road. We'll inevitably run into the same kind of thing down the road with another partner in some other way until we learn to face the issue.”

Mind: There’s a past. Feeling: No there isn’t.

Consciousness arises as people, people do not have consciousness to raise. When something doesn’t resonate, instead of labeling the heart of consciousness “depressing”, simple listen to it, and let the conceptualizing go, create, you already are.

2 “Concepts don't define who you are.” - Gesundheit If you really leave conceptualizing yourself out of the picture, there’s no more reality. Meditation is ‘reality’ where there’s not yet a concept of a me. Yes. Conceptualizing, not direct experience.

If you can be a way, other than you, how would that way, not be you, when you are being, that way? If that way is not you, what is it? If there are infinite ways of being, and you know this, how did you arrive at this conclusion? Did infinite ways end, such that you concluded this? If you’ve experienced other ways, how are they excluded?

Perplexing.

@4201 It sounds like thoughts arise which do not feel good, and you aren’t realizing you’re attaching / believing them, until you’re already believing the ‘bigger’ thought story. Blowing it out of proportion so to speak, life sized, my whole future, etc. Often, but not always, I find that is due to a self-belief. Something someone thinks is different about themself, and or their preferences, which they consider to be ‘wrong’ or ‘unfortunate’ or ‘unacceptable’. Such a belief is credited to the world, or ‘just how it is’. So there is a loop...bad feeling....(thought:) it’s just how it is’ / ‘it’s just how I am’....bad feeling....thought again...bad feeling.... Shorter term... What I believe would most impact this is a cathartic experience. Something like a trip, talking with someone who can help you inspect what’s going on from a different perspective so you can experience some ah ha’s and releases, or if it’s applicable, forgiveness or yourself or another, or acceptance of something you have yet to accept, about yourself or another. Longer term... In more of an ongoing day to day manor, I think Concentration (single pointedness) Meditation would be ideal. It makes it incredibly easier to let a thought in discord go, and also to have clarity around it. Anytime, 24/7, no matter what you’re doing, ‘dial into’ seeing, hearing, feeling, breathing. Put attention there. It by default removes attention from thought, making it easier to ‘see’ what’s going on, and be less attached to thought, and therefore the belief has some space to come up & out. What these all point to is the release of a blockage, a belief about yourself relating to life, which isn’t true. This of course is the challenge with beliefs. It can be very hard to spot because one already believes it’s true. We can more easier see what is in front of us, then in our thoughts. Writing about how you feel right now, in the moment, without going to a past or future in thinking, helps presence, and emotions to clear & release. If you feel bad, you are already focused on what you don’t want. Stop, and write. You’ll realize what it is from seeing the writing in front of you. It’s more 3rd person view, than inner world.

@InterruptReQuest Try this. It’s likely the sacral chakra and solar plexus (at the least) will be that direct mystical experience. ‘Dial into’ that, and ‘bridge it’ or ‘extend it’ with / via feeling outwardly from the stomach area to throughout the entire body, and in continuing to maintain awareness / presence of the feeling, continue outward beyond the body. Might not hallucinate per se, but you might have a deep sense this is a hallucination.

Can you be a way other than you? What way are you?

To who?

@Javfly33 ? Silence, and of course, not even. If nothing else, listen to that video at 1:55 for twenty seconds. Maybe you find it as funny as I do. Notice perception is actually silence. Also, this Having An Inner Smile meditation and this ‘Feeling Of Me’ version of Self Inquiry strike me as simple easy gems for ‘amping up’ where you’re at. Not to imply there actually is a you anywhere, or that you need anything, yet, ‘connect while it’s hot’, so to speak, you bottomless being. ?

@AminB501 I’d do some untangling of that part about ‘need to almost empty all the time, because of stressful demands’ by scrutinizing how you’re filling up what you’re emptying. Potentially a bit of an emotional rabbit hole, but I’ve have been pleasantly blown away many times over at how different experience as a whole can be, specifically in terms of stress & energy, from such scrutiny, or untangling of interpretation.

Bottomless.

?

Do so as it calms the mind and fills the body with feeling. The thinking ‘to awaken’ is counter productive to awakening. Awakening already is, and is covered with misunderstanding, beliefs, misidentification, and misinterpretation. When all else is let go (that’s what meditation & yoga are for) only wakefulness, or being, remains. Then it is the most obvious ‘thing’. The thinking, or, making the primary point ‘to awaken’ reinforces the belief paradigm of the separate self. (Careful not to go down the thought story road of there is a ‘you’ which will awaken, or that there are ‘higher conscious’, or ‘enlightened people’, etc) Make the primary point what resonates, which can not be from anyone else. Deconstruction, inspection, investigation...not obtaining, achieving, becoming.

It’s already within you. Opening, or, open mindedness is the way. Self exploration & expression is the way. There is a psychological dualistic paradigm which sounds like ‘there is a process & understanding’, which I don’t have / know, and so I am lacking, and so I need to learn ‘how’ (need being related to identifying with the previous thoughts from which lack was derived). That ‘I don’t understand’ is an assumption founded on ‘that there is something to understand’. Make a dreamboard. Write everything & anything you want to do, be, have and experience in this life. Don’t ‘seriously contemplate it’, just add stuff whenever it pops up in thought / feeling. Let thoughts that don’t feel good to you go. Try this each morning, the earlier the better. The better you feel, the more that ‘pops up’. As days pass you’ll experience a vantage point that you have never experienced. You’ll see what you prefer, like, love, desire in a completely new way because it’s in front of you, and not swirling around in thoughts resulting in ‘lack’ etc. It is likely the mind is going to the absence of practical explanation...let that thinking go for now. One step at a time. Having millions of dollars is not as valuable as days filled with all that you love. And of course, there is a absolutely no reason you can not have your cake and eat it to. If I were to give you ten dollars for each dollar you gave me, you’d surely give me all the money you have. Such is letting a thought (the ‘dollar’) in discord with feeling go, and receiving ‘ten dollars’ (insights, passion, epiphanies, excitement, eagerness, jubilation, inspiration, etc). If the mind is occupied in the busy work of voluntary thinking, correcting lack, self improvement, etc, etc, etc...where can the insights arise? Let go. Feel. Express. Watch it come together on your board - watch it ‘show up’ in your life.

☺️

Notice (your) reaction arise, pause, and choose to respond in accordance, alignment, with feeling, with what feels good to you. You’re not responsible for doing this for anyone else. The ‘emotional support’ is always readily abundantly within you. Connect, and you no longer believe the thought that you need emotional support. Be attentive to what you have been inattentive to, reactionary behavior / unaligned being. In doing so, you liberate. This might be just the thing. ?

The common sense.

Billy Elliot. Trolls. Blinded By The Light. Small foot. Life of Pie. ?

AWARENESS OF THOUGHTS MEDITATION By learning to watch your thoughts come and go during this practice, you can gain deeper insight into thinking altogether (such as it’s transience) and into specific relationships among your thoughts and your emotions, sensations, and desires. This practice can also help you take your thoughts less personally, and not automatically believe them. Additionally, this meditation can offer insight into any habitual patterns of thinking and related reactions. Observe your thoughts as they arise and pass. By “thoughts,” we mean self-talk and other verbal content, as well as images, memories, fantasies, and plans. Just thoughts may appear in awareness, or thoughts plus sensations, emotions, or desires. Sit or lie down on your back in a comfortable position. Become aware of the sensations of breathing. After a few minutes of following your breath, shift your attention to the various thoughts that are arising, persisting, and then passing away in your mind. Try to observe your thoughts instead of getting involved with their content or resisting them. Notice the content of your thoughts, any emotions accompanying them, and the strength or pull of the thought. Try to get curious about your thoughts. Investigate whether you think in mainly images or words, whether your thoughts are in color or black and white, and how your thoughts feel in your body. See if you notice any gaps or pauses between thoughts. Every time you become aware that you are lost in the content of your thoughts, simply note this and return to observing your thoughts and emotions. Remember that one of the brain’s major purposes is to think, and there is nothing wrong with thinking. You are simply practicing not automatically believing and grasping on to, or ‘clinging’ to your thoughts. When you are ready, return your attention to your breath for a few minutes and slowly open your eyes. Optional: There are various metaphors and images you can use to help observe your thoughts. These include: Imagining you are as vast and open as the sky, and thoughts are simply clouds, birds, or planes passing through the open space. Imagining you are sitting on the side of a river watching your thoughts float by like leaves or ripples in the stream. Imagine your thoughts are like cars, buses, or trains passing by. Every time you realize you are thinking, you can “get off the bus/train” and return to observing. Please be gentle with yourself if you notice that you are constantly caught up in your thoughts instead of observing them. This is both common and normal. When you realize that you are thinking, gently and compassionately return to observing your thoughts. If the content of your thoughts is too disturbing or distressing, gently shift your attention to your breathing, sounds, or discontinue the practice. Remember that you are not trying to stop thoughts or only allow certain ones to arise. Try to treat all thoughts equally and let them pass away without engaging in their content. This practice can initially be more challenging than other meditations. As you are learning, practice this meditation for only a few minutes at a time if that is easier. It can be helpful to treat thoughts the same way that you treat sounds or body sensations, and view them as impersonal events that arise and pass away. Some people like to assign numbers or nicknames to reoccurring thoughts in order to reduce their pull and effect.

Karma is not conceptual, it’s direct experience. ‘Picking a bone’ with it is creating more of it. It can be held off but it is felt & known by the holder, though one might not understand what it actually is, how it clouds them, and how to release it. Karma is also individuated as well as collective, and transcendent of time.

@28 cm unbuffed Interesting. Just two cents, but I wouldn’t equate the void to the thought loops. Imo, this is the message yet received, of too little foundation and inspection & too much substance. ‘I’ am ‘in the void’ now, and it is a perfect peace and love. No “thoughts”. No thoughts of escape, or running. It is quite noticeable that nothing can be said here, on behalf of a we. By that ‘I’ mean there is no direct experience of a we, and thus there is no possibility of projection, lying, convincing, deluding, escaping an ourselves, no horrifying void, no entities, no matrix. Just this peace & love.

@LfcCharlie4 Fo sho.