Nahm

@Muhammad Jawad @flume Interesting. I’ll look up that video. Thank you’s!

There is a paradox you’ve got to appreciate from a place of being lighthearted & humble in regard to what you’re thinking about, even though you can not understand what that paradox is right now. The more you focus on thinking about death, or existential thoughts, the more you’re heading to stress, if not already. The paradox is that you can’t “figure this stuff out” by thinking because that’s always just more thoughts. Your true nature, what “death” really is, is the right-now-awareness of the thoughts. Awareness is veiled by the very thoughts. More thinking equals more veiling, not more self realization. It’s like a flashlight looking for itself in the light on the wall, it’ll never “find” it, it has to realize what it is by not believing it will be found on the wall. When you adopt a practice like daily meditation you are slowly over time letting go of the attachment to thoughts, and your true nature automatically ‘rises’, as expression and conditioning empties from the body mind. If you are in a hurry to self realize, to know truth, and you are feeling any resistance of that hurry, do yourself the self loving favor and listen to that resistance, and slow down.

@Nate0068 Sounds rough, sendin good vibes your way. If it’s helpful or useful information...too much focus on conceptual & existential thinking for too long without a foundation of some body / awareness grounding practice, and some emotional expression, can lead to skewing everything perspectively for the worse. I wish you well, and the difficulty of this will pass. Do your best not to ‘dig in’, keep letting go. Relax into the body as much as you can, let thinking & concerns go. Take the day off from any ‘figuring out’, or ‘future ruminating’. Maybe a few days. Take a day or so off of any screens etc. You’ll feel better naturally, by default. Amazing but true. You’ll have a lot of insights from this when this passes. Just keep letting any troublesome thoughts go, you’ll feel better soon. Take grounding, body awareness to be first, most paramount on the path & in life in general, and you’ll be feeling better, much better perspectives will return, and the path & your future will be of joy. If that sounds impossible at all, please take my word for it to whatever extent you can. It is not only possible, it is your future and this is a part of it. When people say ‘life is amazing’, etc, etc...be most careful not to deflect that onto them, like ‘they’re just like that and I’m just not like that’. Let that message in a bit. Those people made it through rough stuff too, and the miracle is how life is beyond these challenges. Here that message. Gotta let thoughts that don’t resonate go - swiftly. Gotta be grounded in feeling. Rough to learn this way so young but you gotta know this to recognize these things do work. It’s not as tall of an order as it might seem today either. A little bit each day, and you feel better each day. And you got all of us here to help. Express, let anything you want to out. ? Also, on the dad / work front, I can really relate. My dad was very similar. What I learned in going through it was that the initial ‘sting’ I was feeling was the conditioning of this I unknowingly adapted, resonating when around him. Took a minute to humble down to recognizing that. I also was triggered by specific things he’d say in regard to work, stress, etc. In recognizing that, I was able to catch my reactions, and from conscious stomach breathing, slow down and take time to process the emotion. At first I’d not say anything, just basically looked at my ‘inner mess’ transpiring. Then it became less intense, and I could respond without it being influenced by the reaction. After a while it ‘flipped’, to where I recognized the trigger situation, and felt delight in noticing the emotional reaction was no longer there. Then I felt a lot of appreciation and compassion for him. Pain does reveal Beauty. In hindsight it was clear that’s how he interprets and experiences the world, and many insights as to how & why that is filled in. Here’s some meditations to consider if & when. Really, just reading them can bring about a pleasant change in mindset and outlook.

+1

This is happening in my experience, not a lot, but not rare. Not with countries, just buildings and houses. If you happen to have any insight arise in this regard please share. Appreciate it, thanks!

Pick a better feeling thought about it. Try to refrain from judging feeling. Let a thought in discord with feeling go instead. The thought doesn’t resonate. Don’t accept thoughts that don’t resonate. Choose a better feeling perspective. That is what is meant by “on the path”. If there is resistance to willingly, swiftly letting a discord thought go...now you know what is meant by “ego”.

I”m gonna be a stickler and go a layer deeper cause I’m respecting the hell outta your intention and integrity in inspecting ... You don’t need. Period. Recognize the true freedom in that, accept, feel, recognize - you want. You have experienced, you have preferences. Let others have theirs so you may more clearly know yours. Desire is not a thought, and it is an infinite bottomless well of visceral inspiration. Sure, that’s great. Truly, (down the road perhaps but hopefully some realization right now) there is no need for a silver lining. There is no problem. There is the experience of me saying there’s a problem, and me feeling the discord of my own assessment. It’s a real energy drainer because it ‘leaves’ truth, source, unconditional love, the creator of all you desire to create. Everything is only ever working out for you. Let judgments and expectations go for the real thing, for actuality, for what is now and right in front of you. Even death is a joke. Appreciate, contemplate, what an infinite sense of humor could be. Careful not to underestimate that, and how funny you are. It deflates tension, stress, blame, etc. Laugh at yourself on the daily. Be silly. Keep loose. Be mindful what that does for focus. Write down the smallest step and take it right now. Notice that feeling amazing is being on the path you desire, and is not a product of accomplishments. A single step is all it takes. Recognize so much ruminating, understand it is the cover story for avoiding feeling. Cry, and feel God’s presence. You let go, God fills in. God don’t care about your accomplishments, but God is loving you and supporting you no matter what. (Imo). You. Can’t. Lose. Proceed. Too much conceptualizing. YOu get one thought at a time and you feel it’s alignment or discord. That’s it. Only surfaces. Nothing more. Allow this to point to the ineffable value of daily morning meditation. If you don’t have the time or patience to meditate once a day, meditate twice a day. Nailed it. Release it. That is transcendence.

@Nani In your corner man, you got this. ?? Free will and determinism are just thoughts btw. Try to feel em, try to point to them in perception. Just thoughts. Reality is made of spontaneity. Thoughts are made of reality. There is only this present appearance as it is. No past, no future, no time. It’s only the surface you see right now, and nothing more.

One way to rephrase that....If I stop listening to thoughts, believing there is separation, humans, etc...if I stop comparing and measuring what is actaual with my thoughts...what was that question about again, I forgot already.

You are likely justifiably thinking in terms of coping as a reaction to the behaviors of other people. That is a totally valid experience, but it is not the only way of experiencing. You can’t really be expected to know this already, but it can be discovered that you’re coping with your own perspective which isn’t resonating with you. It’s a game of balancing one’s own unseen un-inspect counterbalancing, and unchecked that could go on for a while. This changes the game in that it repositions you in regard to what and how you’re focusing, as compared to what you’re thinking about and how you’re thinking. You might think in terms of emotional responsibility vs assigning causes of how you feel to other people. That is a certain handing over of your God given empowerment. As an example, there are millions of people experiencing just like you, and there are a handful that will consciously choose what they focus on, create companies online, talk with people & connect online, etc, and that creates the life worth living, the one you came here for, the one that makes sense of this whole place, the one which is the dream in your heart you brought with ya. In letting them be them, you’re giving yourself permission to be you, and if there’s one thing we could all use more of round here, it’s more of that authentic you. Got to be you. Get to be you. The present. The game is already afoot. This is it. Dial into yourself deeper. Let that surface stuff go. (And it’s all surface stuff). Know what motivates and inspires you. Get it in front of you. Paint your environment with that. Focus on that. Let everyone else be everyone else, by acknowledging the reality that they are. That’s precious focus you’re spending. It has an expiration date. Make a dreamboard. Know what you honestly, actually, want. Feel why you want it. (Way, way, way prior to what you’ve already mentioned here). Imagine it is already effortlessly the actuality. Let go of all the conditioning that arises. Let it up and out. It’s a crazy twist which must be directly experienced...but you’re exactly like your parents, conditioning wise. The views you are bothered by in them, are actually yours. That’s what bothered you, not someone else. They’re just teaching you this by being them. Perspectives, beliefs, conditions, resonate like a guitar string in proximity to a struck tuning fork. You can inspect them and release them, and you’ll see for yourself that vibrational resonating doesn’t occur anymore. It is instead met with your being. With love, peace, compassion. A connotation of authenticity is not allowing myself to blame...and instead expressing evermore genuinely, until I strike the gold of the grail. If it’s helpful...stop accepting ruminating, stop accepting a lack of appreciation in your heart. Stop accepting waiting for understanding.

What is the value of self respect? How fundamental is it as a lens of the whole of experience? What is the worth of one’s relationship in real time, alive & feeling, with our source? What do you think people want? What do you actually want? What do people actually want?

@zeroISinfinity “What’s with all this trying to understand each other?” - Love

It can be helpful to acknowledge to yourself that you feel the resonance of your thoughts, and she feels hers. It’s not as grey as it appears. You can not stress enough to relax someone, you can not get inspired enough to motivate someone, you can not get consciousness enough that someone else realizes anything. But you can be an example by living the life most authentic to you. And you can drop your narrative if you want, buy her some flowers and thank her for loving you and caring for you, in her way, the actual way, not your idea of a better way that isn’t actual.

? Best question in human history.

Rupert has a great video on that as well. If memory serves he references Ramani Maharishi.

@4201 Great inspection work man. It is amazing how exploring the subtle nuances can make such changes to the overall experience.

@infinitenrgy Just a difference perspective for consideration.... If you haven’t directly experienced dying or death, it can’t transparently be said you’re afraid of dying or death. You might then say you’re afraid of the unknown, but if you haven’t actually experienced the unknown, that doesn’t hold water either. You might then consider it’s not really dying or the unknown which is feared, but really, how you’ll feel in a future experience (the trip / breakthrough). This brings you full circle back to feeling being paramount. Feeling will never be in a future, but you are worrying as if it could. The good news is how you feel is up to you, and you can inspect thoughts which don’t feel good, and inspection naturally dispels beliefs, resulting in equanimity. Mental & emotional equanimity for a trip is like taking a cross country trip in a limo vs on a thirty year old unicycle. You haven’t actually directly experienced ego, death, ego death, or breakthrough. So it is not possible that these are the cause of the fear. You have directly experienced the thoughts; ego, death, ego death, and breakthrough. These thoughts have been focused on repeatedly and have become beliefs. Let these thoughts go via the daily practices of body awareness and grounding. It is a more enjoyable & lasting alternative to ‘fighting through’ or ‘pushing through’ the breakthrough. (Which hasn’t worked and sucks to experience really). In oodles of feeling, when these same old thoughts arise, they are experienced as if they are a mile away and moving in slow motion. They don’t hold any power to disturb your grounded equanimity. Most subtly speaking, making breakthrough a goal is the creating of the very resistance to the allowing of the breakthrough desired. The breaking-through is actually a letting go of the thoughts which do not feel good to you, but those thoughts have seemed to hijack feeling, and so those thoughts are said to be fear. But the so called fear is actually the feeling response to those thoughts. That which these thoughts do not resonate with is the very no thing ‘trying’ to break through to you as well. When a thought doesn’t resonate, inspect it. Scrutinize it’s validity, it’s actuality. Run it through the filter of: direct experience, or a thought about what is not and has not been directly experienced. Label those no-actual-direct-experience thoughts monkey mind, as to recognize they have no ground in what is actual. (You are not a monkey). Run experience ‘itself’ through the filter of: thought, perception, and feeling. In bringing about this clarity day to day, your trips will be a completely different, enjoyable, smooth, fun and fascinating experiences. No one else is involved in your trip, interpretation is wholly up to you, and is best on a foundation of clarity, or, having done the inspecting. Addressing (confronting really) this “monkey mind” on 4g’s is like inspecting a fire up close you’ve been throwing gas on for years. Addressing this with some plain old homeostatic inspection, and maybe a pen & paper, is really an effortless nature of self-curiosity & self-understanding. The trips stand to then reveal the true nature of your everyday homeostasis, which could rightfully be said to be the very pinnacle, or holy grail, or breakthrough which is sought. Going into a trip with expectation (speaking only from direct experience here) paradoxically is the creating of the resistance to the breakthrough. It is bringing your conditions on a trip to the unconditional. Going into a trip - just for the experience right now of the trip - then you are oriented to allowing whatever unfolds and receiving whatever insight & wisdom arises, and dare I say...you’ll breakthrough. Bring love, appreciation and presence to the trips, and you will be met ten fold in kind. Be careful not to feed thoughts that this implies you should already be ‘there’ in regard to seeing through the fear. It’s a process, a self exploration. This is just an offering of a perspective. Let me know if there is anything I’ve said that I can clarify & trip Well my friend. ?

The key in a sense is that there is no thinker to begin with. If you stand in front of a dry erase board, thoughts arise about what you want, and about goals and timeframes. It’s effortless, like meditation. The potential ‘issue’ is the attachment to outcomes & expectations, which are also thoughts, which are not thought by a thinker. Which is why attachment feels, off.

@4201 Great to hear. ??

@LostSoul The ‘substance’, actuality, or reality of the human and car is awareness. “Human” and “car” are thoughts. Awareness forgets itself being the very experience of human and car. In forgetting itself, awareness believes there are ‘thoughts’. A human is not a separate thing which has awareness. Awareness appears as thought, perception and feeling...and derives ‘human’, and ‘car’. Awareness can ‘go home’, or be knowing of it’s true nature and infinitude, by deconstructing what is actual in regard to experience (aka ‘shining the light of awareness’). Also, this is the (relatively speaking) “value” of meditation. Letting all thoughts go... home, or, the true nature, ‘rises’ of it’s own accord, or, that it is. Life in the knowing one can ‘be home’ anytime gets exciting. The more thrilling and wild the ride the better, since nothing (awareness) can not actually be lost (because there is no one which ‘has’ it). Driving is really un-inspected deriving.

@Ensho Been there, it is horrible, and I feel for ya. Could be diet related. We all respond differently to different foods. The Loophole Shake is the staple of my diet and works really well for me. Give it a try. It’s inexpensive, easy to make, and is packed with nutrition. You might also consider getting a blood work up done at the doctor, and or taking basic vitamins. The definition of vitamin is that which is essential to the optimal functioning of the body mind, but which the body does not produce. Lack of meat would not necessarily cause this, but lack of something in meat like iron, etc could play a role. I don’t get the feeling it’s very diet related though, as you sound pretty diet conscious. I think it is perspective / outlook related, and an understanding of how thoughts, emotions and feeling align would change your life experience for the better even more than you might be able to currently imagine. Expressing how you feel, such as you are now with this thread, is ‘doing the work’, and you should feel good about that. It is going to get better. The mentioning of isolation & enlightenment as a way out is an indicator of long repeated thoughts which are in discord with being. Bringing understanding to this is synonymous with bringing clarity, peace, joy & happiness to experience. In working for a family member, it’s important to recognize you are presently dependent on them financially, this very much can, and likely will at some point change. It’s important, and resonates, to be as open minded about opportunities as possible. In utilizing a Dreamboard, opportunities just...show up, and not necessarily in ways you might have expected. The Shaman can be helpful. Like anything, there is a broad range of quality, and you can only know it’s helpfulness in clarifying experience, by experiencing it. I hope it is very helpful. Talk therapy can also be very, very helpful. I would not limit your expression to their understanding. I would ‘empty both barrels’ expression wise with every session you have. Get it all out. Maybe mention to the therapist “you might not understand all of where I’m coming from, but I gotta express and get stuff out”. I am not a clinical therapist. My wife has a master’s in it, and many of our friends re from that industry. I can appreciate the help it provides and agree with you that it does have it’s limits. I am very familiar beyond those limits, and also offer what usually gets called healing energy, long distance reiki, shaktipah, or RASA. I am more interested in you reaching your own discovery of this within yourself, and my direct experience with this transmission of energy has proven to be exceptional to psychological limitations. I feel that I understand where you’re at on your path in regard to the defending and not being able to crawl out of it. I have been there myself, and have not been there in over twenty years. You can align with your source such that even becomes hard to grasp or imagine. I have the upmost compassion and empathy for what you’re going through and hope the notion of that comment is encouraging and hopeful. Someone who is feeling numb as you mentioned is really my sweet spot, my specialty, the center of my wheelhouse, the ‘why’ I am doing these sessions at all. I was there long ago, and resources like Leo’s videos & forum, and “sessions” were not even a thing. Naturally, this became my calling, or life purpose. If you want to schedule a session here is a link to my website. It’s the same link as below all my posts. Also, I have put together a list of meditations which are oriented exactly to what you want, to how you want to feel, here’s a link. I feel I’m at risk of overwhelming you with information...so maybe consider this post something you can digest a bit, and come back to anytime. Here is a link to a version of The Emotional Scale that I feel adds an important distinction in regard to the benefit of talking with someone. It might helpful with putting what you’re experiencing into perspective, with self-understanding. This page has an explanation as an example of how using the scale plays out that might be refreshing and helpful as well. I hear you on the ‘cry for validation’ and the ego. We could say that it is, but that wouldn’t bring any understanding, clarity, peace of mind, joy, enthusiasm, nor alleviation of your suffering, and I favor those very much and desire to help. When I went through depression etc, my eyes were opened to utilizing every resource available. Though this is not a perspective everyone shares, I imagine a world in which it is. Keep expressing, letting it out. I wish you the best. @mandyjw @allislove Appreciate you guys very much. Thank you. ?

The Emotional Scale (with reference to The Ten Ox Herding Pictures) (By Abraham Hicks) The scale is not about you, you are love and love does not need ‘work’ or ‘taming’. The scale is about emotions experienced, right now. Never in a past or future. Only now. Recognize it is not what anyone says, or ‘how the world is’, etc... which ‘throws you off the ox’...it’s what you’re thinking. In the recognition a thought isn’t resonating, isn’t feeling good...use the scale to choose a better feeling thought. Notice pessimism is a releasing, relieving emotion...in comparison, or relative to....frustration. It simply feels better to express, and then reach for the next higher emotion, by reaching for a thought in accordance with it. Might sound like “ok, I see, I’m creating frustration, by focusing on this thought which is pessimistic”. Then reach for a thought of boredom. This might sound odd initially, but feel it. Boredom feels better than frustration, and better than pessimism. Then reach for contentment. “Can I feel content with what is? With what is actual...with where I’m physically at right now, with just this which I am seeing & hearing, right now? Feel satisfaction in recognizing contentment. Then reach for hopefulness. “If I can move up the scale anytime, to contentment...and I understand that I can do this...well...that makes it much easier to be hopeful, to focus on a thought about things working out.” By choosing, reaching for the thought, and feeling hopeful...it is much easier to then choose an optimistic thought. “Maybe this will work out...I can let thoughts which don’t resonate go, and feel better, and do x, y or z about this”. Then reach for, move into...positive expectation. Because I can move up the emotional scale, because I understand this relationship between thought and inner being...I can believe it’ll work out, and that feels good. Since how I feel is always up to me, I can expect to be able to feel good. I can always use the emotional scale”. “...Well, then it’s not such a big stretch to reach for a thought of being eager about my future to come, about this life and the experiences I’m creating. I get this. I got this. I’m enthused”. “...and this sure feels like tapping into some passion!” “That makes sense now!” “I get how to move to passion...via choosing thoughts which resonate”. “...The experience of this passion...well...I can’t even tell the difference anymore between the thought and this great feeling, this inner being...and that, that which is always available, ever present, always right under my nose, which I know how to ‘get to’....sure feels a lot like this “joy” folks talk about”. “This joy is viscerally empowering, resonating in my mind and body. Perhaps this Joy is more than just emotion. Hard to say wether I love it, or it’s loving me. Doesn’t even matter really, in this joy, this love.” ”...I’ll be damned...it’s pretty easy to appreciate even the smallest of things in this joy and love. It’s empowering. I kinda wanna express this as much as I can, as often as I can”. “...and I can! because I can always move up the emotional scale!” Another version or interpretation of the emotional scale that might be insightful or helpful, given ‘where you’re at’. Meditations oriented in love & loving.

The Emotional Scale. The scale is not about you, you are love and love does not need ‘work’ or ‘taming’. The scale is about emotions experienced, right now. Never in a past or future. Only now. Recognize it is not what anyone says, or ‘how the world is’, etc... which ‘throws you off the ox’...it’s what you’re thinking. In the recognition a thought isn’t resonating, isn’t feeling good...use the scale to choose a better feeling thought. Notice pessimism is a releasing, relieving emotion...in comparison, or relative to....frustration. It simply feels better to express, and then reach for the next higher emotion, by reaching for a thought in accordance with it. Might sound like “ok, I see, I’m creating frustration, by focusing on this thought which is pessimistic”. Then reach for a thought of boredom. This might sound odd initially, but feel it. Boredom feels better than frustration, and better than pessimism. Then reach for contentment. “Can I feel content with what is? With what is actual...with where I’m physically at right now, with just this which I am seeing & hearing, right now? Feel satisfaction in recognizing contentment. Then reach for hopefulness. “If I can move up the scale anytime, to contentment...and I understand that I can do this...well...that makes it much easier to be hopeful, to focus on a thought about things working out.” By choosing, reaching for the thought, and feeling hopeful...it is much easier to then choose an optimistic thought. “Maybe this will work out...I can let thoughts which don’t resonate go, and feel better, and do x, y or z about this”. Then reach for, move into...positive expectation. Because I can move up the emotional scale, because I understand this relationship between thought and inner being...I can believe it’ll work out, and that feels good. Since how I feel is always up to me, I can expect to be able to feel good. I can always use the emotional scale”. “...Well, then it’s not such a big stretch to reach for a thought of being eager about my future to come, about this life and the experiences I’m creating. I get this. I got this. I’m enthused”. “...and this sure feels like tapping into some passion!” “That makes sense now!” “I get how to move to passion...via choosing thoughts which resonate”. “...The experience of this passion...well...I can’t even tell the difference anymore between the thought and this great feeling, this inner being...and that, that which is always available, ever present, always right under my nose, which I know how to ‘get to’....sure feels a lot like this “joy” folks talk about”. “This joy is viscerally empowering, resonating in my mind and body. Perhaps this Joy is more than just emotion. Hard to say wether I love it, or it’s loving me. Doesn’t even matter really, in this joy, this love.” ”...I’ll be damned...it’s pretty easy to appreciate even the smallest of things in this joy and love. It’s empowering. I kinda wanna express this as much as I can, as often as I can”. “...and I can! because I can always move up the emotional scale!”

@Javfly33 Excellent work my man! To #3...might sound silly at first...look at the air. See the air....and look for ‘seeing’. But you can practice through the whole day! In the form of being more focused, practicising concentration, surrender to the moment...etc + regular retreats. Doesnt need to be meditation particularly. ? Beautiful.

@Shiva99 Must. Discover. Letting thought go. Source is looking for every possible angle in. Must. Let. Thought. Go. ?