Nahm

The key in a sense is that there is no thinker to begin with. If you stand in front of a dry erase board, thoughts arise about what you want, and about goals and timeframes. It’s effortless, like meditation. The potential ‘issue’ is the attachment to outcomes & expectations, which are also thoughts, which are not thought by a thinker. Which is why attachment feels, off.

@4201 Great to hear. ??

@LostSoul The ‘substance’, actuality, or reality of the human and car is awareness. “Human” and “car” are thoughts. Awareness forgets itself being the very experience of human and car. In forgetting itself, awareness believes there are ‘thoughts’. A human is not a separate thing which has awareness. Awareness appears as thought, perception and feeling...and derives ‘human’, and ‘car’. Awareness can ‘go home’, or be knowing of it’s true nature and infinitude, by deconstructing what is actual in regard to experience (aka ‘shining the light of awareness’). Also, this is the (relatively speaking) “value” of meditation. Letting all thoughts go... home, or, the true nature, ‘rises’ of it’s own accord, or, that it is. Life in the knowing one can ‘be home’ anytime gets exciting. The more thrilling and wild the ride the better, since nothing (awareness) can not actually be lost (because there is no one which ‘has’ it). Driving is really un-inspected deriving.

@Ensho Been there, it is horrible, and I feel for ya. Could be diet related. We all respond differently to different foods. The Loophole Shake is the staple of my diet and works really well for me. Give it a try. It’s inexpensive, easy to make, and is packed with nutrition. You might also consider getting a blood work up done at the doctor, and or taking basic vitamins. The definition of vitamin is that which is essential to the optimal functioning of the body mind, but which the body does not produce. Lack of meat would not necessarily cause this, but lack of something in meat like iron, etc could play a role. I don’t get the feeling it’s very diet related though, as you sound pretty diet conscious. I think it is perspective / outlook related, and an understanding of how thoughts, emotions and feeling align would change your life experience for the better even more than you might be able to currently imagine. Expressing how you feel, such as you are now with this thread, is ‘doing the work’, and you should feel good about that. It is going to get better. The mentioning of isolation & enlightenment as a way out is an indicator of long repeated thoughts which are in discord with being. Bringing understanding to this is synonymous with bringing clarity, peace, joy & happiness to experience. In working for a family member, it’s important to recognize you are presently dependent on them financially, this very much can, and likely will at some point change. It’s important, and resonates, to be as open minded about opportunities as possible. In utilizing a Dreamboard, opportunities just...show up, and not necessarily in ways you might have expected. The Shaman can be helpful. Like anything, there is a broad range of quality, and you can only know it’s helpfulness in clarifying experience, by experiencing it. I hope it is very helpful. Talk therapy can also be very, very helpful. I would not limit your expression to their understanding. I would ‘empty both barrels’ expression wise with every session you have. Get it all out. Maybe mention to the therapist “you might not understand all of where I’m coming from, but I gotta express and get stuff out”. I am not a clinical therapist. My wife has a master’s in it, and many of our friends re from that industry. I can appreciate the help it provides and agree with you that it does have it’s limits. I am very familiar beyond those limits, and also offer what usually gets called healing energy, long distance reiki, shaktipah, or RASA. I am more interested in you reaching your own discovery of this within yourself, and my direct experience with this transmission of energy has proven to be exceptional to psychological limitations. I feel that I understand where you’re at on your path in regard to the defending and not being able to crawl out of it. I have been there myself, and have not been there in over twenty years. You can align with your source such that even becomes hard to grasp or imagine. I have the upmost compassion and empathy for what you’re going through and hope the notion of that comment is encouraging and hopeful. Someone who is feeling numb as you mentioned is really my sweet spot, my specialty, the center of my wheelhouse, the ‘why’ I am doing these sessions at all. I was there long ago, and resources like Leo’s videos & forum, and “sessions” were not even a thing. Naturally, this became my calling, or life purpose. If you want to schedule a session here is a link to my website. It’s the same link as below all my posts. Also, I have put together a list of meditations which are oriented exactly to what you want, to how you want to feel, here’s a link. I feel I’m at risk of overwhelming you with information...so maybe consider this post something you can digest a bit, and come back to anytime. Here is a link to a version of The Emotional Scale that I feel adds an important distinction in regard to the benefit of talking with someone. It might helpful with putting what you’re experiencing into perspective, with self-understanding. This page has an explanation as an example of how using the scale plays out that might be refreshing and helpful as well. I hear you on the ‘cry for validation’ and the ego. We could say that it is, but that wouldn’t bring any understanding, clarity, peace of mind, joy, enthusiasm, nor alleviation of your suffering, and I favor those very much and desire to help. When I went through depression etc, my eyes were opened to utilizing every resource available. Though this is not a perspective everyone shares, I imagine a world in which it is. Keep expressing, letting it out. I wish you the best. @mandyjw @allislove Appreciate you guys very much. Thank you. ?

The Emotional Scale (with reference to The Ten Ox Herding Pictures) (By Abraham Hicks) The scale is not about you, you are love and love does not need ‘work’ or ‘taming’. The scale is about emotions experienced, right now. Never in a past or future. Only now. Recognize it is not what anyone says, or ‘how the world is’, etc... which ‘throws you off the ox’...it’s what you’re thinking. In the recognition a thought isn’t resonating, isn’t feeling good...use the scale to choose a better feeling thought. Notice pessimism is a releasing, relieving emotion...in comparison, or relative to....frustration. It simply feels better to express, and then reach for the next higher emotion, by reaching for a thought in accordance with it. Might sound like “ok, I see, I’m creating frustration, by focusing on this thought which is pessimistic”. Then reach for a thought of boredom. This might sound odd initially, but feel it. Boredom feels better than frustration, and better than pessimism. Then reach for contentment. “Can I feel content with what is? With what is actual...with where I’m physically at right now, with just this which I am seeing & hearing, right now? Feel satisfaction in recognizing contentment. Then reach for hopefulness. “If I can move up the scale anytime, to contentment...and I understand that I can do this...well...that makes it much easier to be hopeful, to focus on a thought about things working out.” By choosing, reaching for the thought, and feeling hopeful...it is much easier to then choose an optimistic thought. “Maybe this will work out...I can let thoughts which don’t resonate go, and feel better, and do x, y or z about this”. Then reach for, move into...positive expectation. Because I can move up the emotional scale, because I understand this relationship between thought and inner being...I can believe it’ll work out, and that feels good. Since how I feel is always up to me, I can expect to be able to feel good. I can always use the emotional scale”. “...Well, then it’s not such a big stretch to reach for a thought of being eager about my future to come, about this life and the experiences I’m creating. I get this. I got this. I’m enthused”. “...and this sure feels like tapping into some passion!” “That makes sense now!” “I get how to move to passion...via choosing thoughts which resonate”. “...The experience of this passion...well...I can’t even tell the difference anymore between the thought and this great feeling, this inner being...and that, that which is always available, ever present, always right under my nose, which I know how to ‘get to’....sure feels a lot like this “joy” folks talk about”. “This joy is viscerally empowering, resonating in my mind and body. Perhaps this Joy is more than just emotion. Hard to say wether I love it, or it’s loving me. Doesn’t even matter really, in this joy, this love.” ”...I’ll be damned...it’s pretty easy to appreciate even the smallest of things in this joy and love. It’s empowering. I kinda wanna express this as much as I can, as often as I can”. “...and I can! because I can always move up the emotional scale!” Another version or interpretation of the emotional scale that might be insightful or helpful, given ‘where you’re at’. Meditations oriented in love & loving.

The Emotional Scale. The scale is not about you, you are love and love does not need ‘work’ or ‘taming’. The scale is about emotions experienced, right now. Never in a past or future. Only now. Recognize it is not what anyone says, or ‘how the world is’, etc... which ‘throws you off the ox’...it’s what you’re thinking. In the recognition a thought isn’t resonating, isn’t feeling good...use the scale to choose a better feeling thought. Notice pessimism is a releasing, relieving emotion...in comparison, or relative to....frustration. It simply feels better to express, and then reach for the next higher emotion, by reaching for a thought in accordance with it. Might sound like “ok, I see, I’m creating frustration, by focusing on this thought which is pessimistic”. Then reach for a thought of boredom. This might sound odd initially, but feel it. Boredom feels better than frustration, and better than pessimism. Then reach for contentment. “Can I feel content with what is? With what is actual...with where I’m physically at right now, with just this which I am seeing & hearing, right now? Feel satisfaction in recognizing contentment. Then reach for hopefulness. “If I can move up the scale anytime, to contentment...and I understand that I can do this...well...that makes it much easier to be hopeful, to focus on a thought about things working out.” By choosing, reaching for the thought, and feeling hopeful...it is much easier to then choose an optimistic thought. “Maybe this will work out...I can let thoughts which don’t resonate go, and feel better, and do x, y or z about this”. Then reach for, move into...positive expectation. Because I can move up the emotional scale, because I understand this relationship between thought and inner being...I can believe it’ll work out, and that feels good. Since how I feel is always up to me, I can expect to be able to feel good. I can always use the emotional scale”. “...Well, then it’s not such a big stretch to reach for a thought of being eager about my future to come, about this life and the experiences I’m creating. I get this. I got this. I’m enthused”. “...and this sure feels like tapping into some passion!” “That makes sense now!” “I get how to move to passion...via choosing thoughts which resonate”. “...The experience of this passion...well...I can’t even tell the difference anymore between the thought and this great feeling, this inner being...and that, that which is always available, ever present, always right under my nose, which I know how to ‘get to’....sure feels a lot like this “joy” folks talk about”. “This joy is viscerally empowering, resonating in my mind and body. Perhaps this Joy is more than just emotion. Hard to say wether I love it, or it’s loving me. Doesn’t even matter really, in this joy, this love.” ”...I’ll be damned...it’s pretty easy to appreciate even the smallest of things in this joy and love. It’s empowering. I kinda wanna express this as much as I can, as often as I can”. “...and I can! because I can always move up the emotional scale!”

@Javfly33 Excellent work my man! To #3...might sound silly at first...look at the air. See the air....and look for ‘seeing’. But you can practice through the whole day! In the form of being more focused, practicising concentration, surrender to the moment...etc + regular retreats. Doesnt need to be meditation particularly. ? Beautiful.

@Shiva99 Must. Discover. Letting thought go. Source is looking for every possible angle in. Must. Let. Thought. Go. ?

Money must be seen as important, and equally of no importance. Your own money psychology is paramount, and attachment (over focusing on thoughts about money) is counter intuitively nonproductive. Abraham Hicks (YouTube) is the best resource I’ve found for spiritual money psychology. If you find yourself thinking about money in any troublesome way...switch to imagining yourself with oodlles of it, feel all the things you’ll do, have, enjoy & experience. It is the feeling, spirit, which is the source of all the ideas, inspiration, energy, and the money “itself”. This comment might serve as a more literal example, in that I am a man, and am not at all a man (so I’m commenting, by not commenting). Denial of either aspect would still be exclusion, denial. Did I disrespect your excluding of males...or bring inclusion to your party? Notice, it’s alwaysup to you. And so it is with money as well.

@ivankiss So Well said. ? Truth always ‘sets you free’. Absolutely reliable.

When dreaming I'm guided to another world Time and time again At sunrise I fight to stay asleep 'Cause I don't want to leave the comfort of this place 'Cause there's a hunger, a longing to escape From the life I live when I'm awake So let's go there Let's make our escape Come on, let's go there Let's ask can we stay? Can you take me higher? To the place where blind men see Can you take me higher? To the place with golden streets Although I would like our world to change It helps me to appreciate Those nights and those dreams But, my friend, I'd sacrifice all those nights If I could make the Earth and my dreams the same The only difference is To let love replace all our hate Up high I feel like I'm alive for the very first time. Set up high I'm strong enough to take these dreams and make them mine. So high I'm strong enough to take these dreams and make them mine. Can you take me higher? Let’s ask, can we stay.

”With everybody looking at you funny...you got to hold on”.

There is one of you, in the most obvious sense, you’ve never experienced “being two you’s”. The words don’t even resonate or make sense. Insights are thinking based appearances with a little feeling experience. Breadcrumbs of the path. Notions there must be more to this. You could experience zero, a hundred, or millions of insights. They’re specific to topics, and are the relinquishing of an overlay, filter, or essentially, of a most innocent and unavoidable self misunderstanding. Insights come & go, appear and disappears. They’re delightful, delicious, yet are only appearing & disappearing in direct experience. To draw out the difference in regard to intuition, notice you don’t actually experience intuitions, as in plural. Intuition is ‘far less’ appearance, or, is directly of The One. This may or may not ‘land’... Imagine me and you are sitting in college and I ask you “how’d you get into this place?”. Your answer might be “paid tuition”. So you might consider being in the college, is being in tuition. Tuition being your ticket into the college...and now you’re in it. If you are infinite...and find yourself in an apparent finite world...and wonder “How did I even get in here”...you can follow the trail so to speak, the trail of breadcrumbs of the tuition you paid - the knowing of your own infinitude! ...which is THIS! And is now, in experience, referred to as “intuition”.

@Intraplanetary ?? I like the phrase, “the other side of that wall is a thought”. (In regard to whatever wall is ‘in front of you’) Seeing through this thought has the power to bring a new consideration to mind. When it is recognized ‘the other side of that wall’ is a thought, and not actually the perception of an other side of the wall...it can ‘click’ that I am infinite being appearing as that “wall”. Thus, what I fear, that which could be said to be uncertain, or that which is “the other side of that wall” appearing as that wall - is actually me. “The wall” is actually made of what is absolutely, unequivocally, indisputably, undeniably, certain. Just like, exactly like - you are most certainly you (just forgot your infinitude). It is also relieving and enlightening to scrutinize, to actually try to find, an actual separation between the wall, the seeing, and the knowing of the seeing.

@Intraplanetary See if you can allow this to be the most profound wisdom. ever. The context I’m offering it in can be ‘triggering’. If so, notice the correlation between the thought & resistance / tensing ‘ contracting in the body. It might be more surface level, light a tightening of the neck, hands or waistline. It might be more deeply repeated, and felt as subtle emotional distress or turmoil. Then utilize that knowing of the relationship between certain thoughts and the tensing of specific area(s), parts, muscles, or even organs etc of the body. You can ‘work it’ backwards. By being aware, mindfully relaxing that body area, the mind also relaxes and let’s go of the repetition of the body-tensing-thought. This utilizes triggering rather than suffering from it, allowing the healing of Well Being into this area of the body mind. Likely, some deeper emotional misunderstandings are released form the body.? If this doesn’t make sense or isn’t clear enough please let me know, thanks! ☺️

It’s not possible since you are yourself. It’s a matter of thought attachment, and you can notice the specific theme which ‘feeds’ this is claiming things as yours. Awareness and non-reaction of these thoughts is the unwinding & surrendering of these thoughts. What remains is simply just Goodness, without qualifications, validations, or any details really. You can make self-love oriented Meditations your ‘go to’ (rather than thinking) which is most efficient.

@Muhammad Jawad Iknowright! So Good! ♥️?☺️ @zeroISinfinity ...what for it....wait for it...

‘You’ must go prior to understanding as it is still appearance. That is a pointer, and of course not something that can be understood. Only the experience will do, and even ‘experience’ only points to what is prior to experiencing. Notice, when you say ‘they don’t exist’, you are still acknowledging a ‘they’ but just disregarding this with the thought ‘non-existence’ (which there is not). This is subtle thought attachment. What each one is ‘trying to overcome’ is not collective and is in actuality what each is one is trying to let go of from one’s relative experience / appearance / life / past (which is actually made of the ‘substance’ of one’s self). Consider perception is not ‘yours’. (That’s a thought about perception...which is best ‘experienced’ without filters.) Meditation, yoga, retreats, trips, loving everyone & everything, etc. Experience, rather than thinking.

@Muhammad Jawad ☺️♥️ Thank “God”.

@Muhammad Jawad Hey. Welcome home.

Absolutely. You don’t have to worry at all, about anything. Letting go is an art & a process. Sounds like a great experience! The experiences and insights are delightful of their own accord, and don’t per se need to mean or predict anything. That tends to veil the presence sought in the first place. Memories are great experiences too! That there truly isn’t anything you have to worry about is similar to that there is no need for certainty (something to rely on). Plurality. There is no limit to appearances (insights)...but just one intuition.

@gggkkk Very nice. Love the solo retreats, couldn’t agree more.

Awareness is aware of the thoughts “I think yes”, “I lost this”, “I had it”. The thoughts appear & disappear, just like clouds. Awareness never appears and never disappears, just like the sky. Truly, awareness is aware, of awareness. Clouds & thoughts are made of awareness. Are awareness. There is no such thing, as awareness.

No.

A different perspective to consider...in case it resonates... I find absolute security in a social environment... ...because I recognize I’m feeling the resonance of my own thoughts, and others are feeling the resonance of their own thoughts. This is direct experience. Paranoia disregards direct experience, believing one is feeling based on the thoughts of another...but one does not know the thoughts of another in one’s direct experience. Even when another verbally expresses their thoughts...one still does not know another’s thoughts...only one’s own. Next time you experience the anxiety, breathe in a four count...and breathe out an eight count (twice as slow as the in breath). Allow your entire body to relax, and gently tune in to seeing, hearing, and feeling...while repeating the four / eight breathing. I believe if you practice this each morning for a few minutes, the tide of momentum will shift such that you forget what the paranoia experience was even like.