Nahm

@PurpleTree You’re imagining there are “insights” & “visions”. By definition this is delusional.

The only way this can be a dream is if there is not a this or a dream. (Imo) Investigate every single one of those inquires. Don’t settle for conjecture. ??

Reality’s so preposterous.

@Someone here Great realization.

@Albert Roiterstein The double slit experiment. Convincing others would be conflictual though, as there is a ‘deeper’ implication (and hopefully revelation) in regard to the findings of that experiment. Also, look into ‘quantum erasure’.

@catcat69123 ?? @fopylo Also comes to mind… the approach of “the secret”. Sometimes when we haven’t yet accepted something about ourselves we make a secret out of it in a way, and feel ashamed, and don’t want anyone to ‘find out’ or know our secret and judge or not accept us. This can make it seem like we have to be overly critical and always on guard so no one finds out. But no matter what, if it is, whatever it is, it is something to embrace, love, & nourish. Often, the more unique / rare / or specific whatever the aspect could be, the more we ‘keep the secret’. But in truth, the variety, the uniqueness of us, both in our preferences and our experiences, is the greatest.

Care more about how you feel than what other people might think. Notice that’s always what you’re thinking, and in owning the judgment it ‘come into the light of awareness’… and the emotions and specifically doubt are clearer. As in, you begin to realize how you are creating how you feel, and you lean toward not judging yourself via what you think other people might think. Inspect the fear on paper, not ‘in your head’. Write about what you’re afraid of. If you do this thoroughly what you were afraid of disappears / is realized to only have been what you were focusing on / thinking. I’d also write about relationships with parents etc growing up, and look to discover and realize things like where the focus on needing validation or approval began. That can also help unravel it. Also you mentioned when talking with people it’s hard to focus on yourself. Try not trying to focus on yourself. Be curious, inquisitive, interested in someone while talking with them. Ask them questions about themself or their experiences, or simply how they like this or that. Use that engagement as a break from focusing on yourself, and feel the relief of doing so. Also, don’t use other people’s concepts like authority, authenticity, survival, realness, etc against yourself, or, as your means to create doubt or impatience. Use the emotional scale, it works. Start with whatever emotion you’re experiencing, like fear or doubt, and express that you are feeling it, and then express that when you feel that emotion, you feel the next one higher on the scale. Finish the scale each time you use it / go all the way to the top. And don’t skip any emotions on the scale. Also comes to mind, from Byron Katie, there is your business, their business & God’s business. I think that is a clear way to frame up experience for you presently. Gotta let other people’s thoughts & words be their business. You could also try exposure. Bring to mind what you’re afraid of someone saying to you, and have someone say it to you. You might feel the trigger or reaction. Then relax the whole body and feel breathing from your stomach, so you can see & experience that the reaction comes & goes. You’ll see more clearly how & why it’s triggering. Repeat that until you’re not triggered, but feeling lighter and hopefully laughing as it clicks that there’s just no use in trying to control what you have no control over (what anyone thinks or says). And there is much use in controlling what you do have control over (what you think, focus on, and say). It’s a bit like having a fear of bee’s, and then just purposefully getting stung. It stings, but you realize it’s not as bad as you were making it out to be. But you gotta do / experience this stuff. Just thinking about it doesn’t change anything.

Infinite can not know finite.

@blessedlion1993 The difference between focus on escaping X vs creating Y seems subtle but is not. It is actually thee difference. Focusing on escaping is focusing on the absence of, or the no longer experiencing of, what you don’t want. Not that I’m trying to push any specific avenue, but the stress doesn’t come from the managing, but from the lens, from what and the way one is interpreting & focusing.

What seems to be thought about (infinite being) isn’t thought about, but is appearing as “thoughts”.

@Kalki Avatar It is at first, but simply for how it feels, one tends to ‘go less into it’. Like an event is experienced in such a way there is emotional discord for days. Then later, maybe a day. Then an hour, then just minutes, then in real time, aligned.

No ya didn’t. I understand you believe you did, but you didn’t. Lol no it wasn’t. No it didn’t & wasn’t actually. No, ya didn’t. ? no it doesn’t. Actually it totally did. Not even possible!

That’s nuts.

I hope the rest of this day is the best day you ever experienced.

Didn’t lift a finger, didn’t do anything at all, literally. Simply sat on the cushion like any other morning. But, I never heard any of what you mentioned above, so there was no story about me, God, dying, etc, etc, playing in my mind, which was perfectly empty from the daily meditation. Empty your cup. Try to actually notice none of that stuff is actually happening. It’s literally just thoughts about. Like a narration of a movie. Super simple… same ‘answer’ / ‘solution’ every time… just return attention to feeling breathing from the stomach. You could turn making a paper airplane into a college course at this rate. ? Lighten up and have a laugh… “who exactly am I even talking about which is selfish?!” … “Why am I even thinking that, focusing on that, thinking that way?!?” (And laugh) That you’re giving up anything is a thought. Meditation is most ideal for thought attachment.

??

How you sleep is fine, how you feel when you wake up is fine, where you live is fine, whatever thoughts arise, it’s fine. Take every bit of focus on that it isn’t, and focus instead on the feeling of having what you prefer more. Your experience will become that. There is no other possibility, as this has been the case since day 1.

Thanks, appreciate it, but… I didn’t have anything figured out, and I never adopted the lenses of toxic or luck. Yes, loa, dreamboard - vibration. ‘Beneath’ a direct belief of the outward (perspective one is aware of), is an indirect implication belief of the inward (emotion one is aware of). For example my dad had his issues, anger, blame etc, but I didn’t choose to see him as an abuser because the indirect implication is I’m a victim. If I had, and I realized that, I’d have changed the belief via the realization, and what I attract would change in kind - in parallel - simultaneously. It’s always how one see’s oneself so to speak. The relationship if you will between you and source. ? Perception & thought are obviously convincing, but it’s never actually about either. It’s up to you and how you think about freedom. As an extreme polar opposite example, some people mentally hold that they are not so free because they didn’t have kids or a family. Again, that’s between you & source, not you and someone else’s opinion. It’s most beautiful in my experience. Easily above all else. But again, you gotta be true to you and where you’re at in life & on your path. Sounds like you are getting clearer by the minute imo. When you put the toxic lens down, like magic there are no toxic “others” anymore, never were actually. This does however bring shadow work to the surface to be let go of, but, that’s ideal ime. Consider, somewhere there’s someone to whom you are toxic. Wild, no? It’s really just unchecked judgement.

@B_HAZ By noticing nothing actually happens when your ‘needs’ aren’t fulfilled, you’re free of them (the beliefs), thus realizing they’re wants, not actually needs. If you need intimacy, you hold yourself captive to neediness. If you express your wants, you infuse desire into your life and what you want shows up. You can introspect and write on paper whatever thoughts or emotions arise, as to when you first ‘learned’ to desire a man which is not available to you. It is likely someone key in your childhood did not make themself available to you, and you’re subconsciously seeking to ‘fix’ that - so you can feel better. One way to let that go is to understand the position they were in, and how they thought, and why they were the way they were… to the extent you realize you would have been exactly the same way if you were in their shoes. When you then feel this understanding & compassion, there is that ‘better’ feeling that was desired in the first place. It is then realized it was there all along, just a bit veiled by the need beliefs.

Don’t frame it as something you have to deal with. Just experience it, while relaxing the body & feeling breathing from your stomach. See that the impulse arises, and then passes, and that you’re totally fine. The mind says ‘do x, y or z to feel better’, but the absolute goodness right there within you would think that’s funny. Inevitably, you’ll get insight as to what makes this whole merry go round go round, and you’ll liberate of the cycles & see reality as it is.

@Rinne The key is feeling the relief of the slow change in your orientation, in your aligning. Not expecting one big change from one big thing to occur on one day. Not expecting ‘results’, but recognizing that it feels good to you to focus more & more on what you want, more (more than pmo). It’s a momentum thing. Presently, you’re experiencing the accumulation of many years of momentum. The momentum that got you there, wherever or whatever that is, is the very same momentum that will get you where you now more so desire to be. So know what that is which you are now more desiring. Creating a dreamboard makes that pretty easy because it’s right in front of you, can’t miss it or forget. Then the change over… now you have you ‘why’, or, that which you want more which is the reason there seems to be a problem with how you’re spending your time in the first place. It’s only relative. If there wasn’t experience you wanted more, if that desire hadn’t arose within you, it wouldn’t be possible to desire change. Slow changeover… when you are experiencing the thick of the situation, which would be seeing what’s on your board, and knowing you want that more… but yet being drawn to porn & masturbating… remember the slowness of the changeover, and feel the peace & relief in not expecting great change all at once. When that momentous impulse for immediate short term gratification arises… at first just spend literally 5 minutes before going to the screen… on what you want more. Your mind will be more settled, knowing you’re about to experience the short term pleasure in just five minutes. Then next time make it ten minutes, then fifteen, and so on. You’ll find yourself realizing there was never, and is not right now, a ‘problem’. That that was the previous perspective. Life will get more exciting as what you write on your board really actually does start ‘showing up’, and your focus will naturally (slowly over time) shift toward that. Internalizing, or self judgement probably plays a role in the inner world in this regard too. When you experience such thoughts, which are basically about feeling bad for the pmo, take pause and ‘reach for’ a slightly better feeling thought. You might say an overall shift is coming, from loving yourself, to Loving Yourself. If you choose now to focus on a good feeling thought, then it’s already underway.

@Kalki Avatar Focusing on protecting against judgement is kind of automatic (conditioning), until you’re aware of it. Then you’re aware you’re focusing on that perspective(s). You don’t have to focus on thinking or worrying about what people think or might think about you. You’re feeling your thoughts, they’re feeling theirs. Presently, you believe to some degree you’re feeling theirs, or some kind of effects of theirs. But you’re feeling what you’re thinking, about what they might be thinking… without ever having any actual experience, of what they’re thinking. Focusing on thoughts that don’t feel good to you is the energy drainer. Not ‘dealing with what other people think or say’. Order spaghetti at a restaurant and dump it on your head. (Or something of that nature). See how this ‘embarrassment’ really feels. It’s not as bad as the worrying about it is. Better to get stung than to live a life afraid of bee’s. Get your hands dirty in this life thingy. Get in the mud of it. Really live. To be without the seriousness… just be serious on purpose.

Falling in love is very much like awakening. Seems like you’re the thinker, and the thoughts, strategizing, planning, etc all matter. LOL but they don’t. It’s all a facade. The thought narrative about you doing isn’t actual, it’s apparent. Thoughts which are a smokescreen to the fact you are presently love in love. Sounds conflicting if you think about it.

It’s preference, opinion, not wisdom. Been with my wife since 21. Wouldn’t change a single thing. Greatest, happiest, most fulfilling relationship, family and life. More so than I ever could have possibly imagined. These things you’re addressing with your threads, very key and very impressive that you’re looking into this. Without changing themselves (beliefs & perspectives) people seem to miss their connotation of relationships, marriage, family, etc, will play out just like their childhood experience… and without changing, either they avoid it via dismissal their entire life, or they proceed and experience their own self full-filling prophecy. At age 46 now, I can tell you that 100% of my friends & peers which did not have a family (specifically kids) regret it. And of all which did, they very much do not regret it. Not to imply you should, or need to. Just sharing some actual local demographics (round 100 people or so). Again, good for you girl. No rush imo, and ‘earlier’ is relative, also just opinion. Getting yourself situated in all ways solo first is probably most ideal. You’re unknowingly internalizing / making it about you. When people do whatever, it’s not about you. So it’s not inferiority. It’s jealousy. Jealousy is a great gift for a creator, as it reveals things you want that you maybe weren’t aware you wanted, and or makes you more aware and more inspired.

@somegirl No one can withdrawal love. That’s a bogus belief. No one can actually withdrawal attention either. She just chooses to put it on something else. Trying to control someone else’s behaviors vs loving them unconditionally is fruitless. If you believe you can’t be happy unless someone does x, y or z… that is your condition you are voluntarily holding. It’s a mindset of powerlessness, and a veil of your actual power; love, happiness. Yesterday I talked with a woman who at age 62 found out through Ancestry.com her mom and dad are not her biological parents, and she has been filled with anger and resentment because her dad (mom died when she was 12) never told her the truth. Her belief was that he didn’t want anyone to know because of his pride. Raised her from day 1.