Maya_0

You watch the desire to it's death. So you watch it when it arises, and then continue to watch it until it passes. Everytime you don't act on the desire, it weakens the habit forces in the mind. So the desire loses its grip more and more with time. However, if you do act on it, the habit forces become stronger in the mind and the desire becomes more deeply rooted.

By surrender I mean that you relax into the fear. You love it. And what is love but absolute acceptance of what is. Only then can you overcome it. All the stuff on your plate is really just a distraction from nonduality and enlightenment work, even if you may not see it that way now. It's a life you've but up from your survival programming and fear of death. But it could be that it isn't the right time to begin the journey. If you ever reach the end, it will be the end of your life as you know it. So you have to be ok with that. Or maybe your not and so you'll remain in the dark.

There is no coping mechanism. It's just fear of death. It's true that dabbling in spirituality will provoke fear in the ego. The whole aim of spiritual path is to rub your ego down more and more until there is nothing left, which is enlightenment/ total selflessness. So spirituality is a death process. You're afraid of the process in the same way you fear your "physical" death. Though in time, following the path, that fear will dissipate and will you see there is no such thing as "death", and was only your fabricated idea. If you want to get started with psychedelics, you can take small amounts (as I see you have already done) You won't have an ego death on anything under 100ug. Or you can try mdma to start (I always recommend that as a starter to altered states of consciousness). You have to have a burning desire for Truth and to see God. That is what will allow you to move past the fear. Surrender to the fear to move past it into Love. ❤

@Kushu2000 Since Infinity is endless and unlimited, even 5 Meo won't take you all the way. With the little glimpse I had, I could intuit the full picture. (Even if I didn't experience the full picture)

Personally I've come to those realizations about Reality from the classical psychedelics (mushrooms, LSD)

God is absolute acceptance of everything and so that is the enlightened perspective. Ego is a resistance to what is happening.

You're right , it won't reduce it. The point is to be aware of it and not react to it.

Sorry to tell you but you don't understand it. If you did, you wouldn't be sad. It's not the ego that is all alone, is you, God that is Alone. You're all Alone but it's not lonely because it's only ever you! Loneliness implies two.

Pretty normal somatic reaction from a large amount of energy that is received. Martin Ball talks about these energetic symptoms a lot. It's the ego getting flushed/purged out of the body.

Death is right here. You die everytime a thought comes to an end.

Mdma is a good intro to altered states. It's very predictable an consistent while being forcefully uplifting. Hard to go wrong. But if you have a tendency for addiction, it might be wise to avoid since it is not without some addiction potential.

I thought about this a bit and came to understand that rebirth/reincarnation doesn't really make sense because you were never born to begin with. Nonduality states there is no individual you/ego, so there cannot be a being that is reborn. The real question that should be asked is if Consciousness will continue to create and identify as form after the ending of this particular form as a body and world.

Try not to be hard on yourself if things aren't advancing. Spiritual integration isn't always a smooth slope upwards. You just have to be kind to yourself if you find yourself backsliding. And if you don't have one already, I recommend a daily meditation practice. It will train the mind to stay calm and focused on present experience.

No one knows what happens after death of the body. Consciousness continues, but consciousness is not really any thing in particular; it is both existence and non existence. Many of the popular spiritual traditions have felt a similar sentiment towards existence, that existence is a burden and rebirth again in an earthly form is undesirable. The main aim of enlightenment was actually to escape the cyclic rounds of rebirth. That is done through stilling the formations in the mind. If you can uproot all desires and unwholesome formations in the mind, there will be no residual energy left that could form into another rebirth after this body dissipates. However, that is only what the teachings claim -- no one has been able to attest to he truth of that. I think the idea is worth considering though.

I have heard the real secret of life is to die before you die, to find out there's no death.

@Leo Gura Ego cannot understand it from it's limited POV but shouldn't the ego's POV have some merit, it being an aspect of God? I just feel the ego's perspective of existence being Hell shouldn't be dismissed so easily by saying "It's all Love" . It is true that it is all Love. But from the egos perspective it looks a totally different way.

I've encountered otherwordly beings on psychedelics, including DMT. As startlingly real as they are, I believe what Martin Balls says about them, which is that these beings (and all visuals you see on psychedelics) are just projections of your own mind/ego.

@Onecirrus It is crucial because all of humanities "problems" stem from the inner neurosis of the mind, the assumption of being a separate individual self.

If you've never done something like this before, it's going to be a real challenge to just sit and do nothing. There will be lots of resistance from the ego and that is what it sounds like you're currently experiencing. I would recommend you take up some sort of spiritual practice though like mindfulness meditation, self inquiry, or yoga. I think one of those should help aid the spiritual purification process along. Eventually after a long period of spiritual work, you'll be able to sit on the beach all day long and be totally content, blissful and desireless for your old temptations.

You don't know yourself yet. It sounds like you have some level of realization but it's far from complete. Your ego is still very much alive and well. I recommend a good meditation practice so you can develop an awareness of the thoughts in your mind. That is the source of your misery, identifying with your mind.

There is, bhikkus, that dimension where there is neither earth nor water, nor fire nor wind, nor dimension of the infinitude of space, nor dimension of the infinitude of consciousness, nor dimension of nothingness, nor dimension of neither perception nor non-perception, nor this world, nor the next world, nor sun, nor moon. And there, I say, there is neither coming, nor going, nor stasis, nor passing away, nor arising: without stance, without foundation, without support. This, just this, is the end of suffering.

Yes enlightenment is the end of the fear of death, which is the root of all fears. Keep striving to awaken.

This question may not be appropriate for Leo's forum, since Leo seems to be gung-ho on self actualization and remaining inside the dream. I haven't heard anything from him on how to attain total liberation. Total liberation was really the goal of Enlightenment traditions throughout history. By total liberation I mean, consciousness stops creating worlds and taking identification with finite forms (e.g. bodies). We can see that awakening leads to liberation in this life, as the mind has seen its insubstantial nature, and the real identity is rightfully understood to be Awareness/Consciousness. But there doesn't seem to be a definite answer to what happens after this life because no one has returned with knowledge of that. So we only have beliefs and speculation.

Yes I am awareness. Awareness is like the screen and form is like the movie playing on the screen. How to stop the movie and just stay the screen?

Reincarnation / rebirth is a hot topic for me. It's interesting because I've had a number of awakenings but none of them seemed to settle an answer to reincarnation. In researching about it, I haven't yet come across any evidence that was totally convincing. Next I'm looking into people who claim they have memories of past lives and people who have had NDEs.