Xpansion

The word enlightenment seems to be thrown around a lot round here. I suppose when you are starting out on a spiritual journey it can be interesting and exciting but you soon learn that enlightenment is not just another thing to accomplish, attain or achieve. You also realise that it's not just some kind of fun easy goal that anyone can get to if they follow steps A B and C. From what I have learnt Its not something you get to by following a linear path set out in a book. There's not even anywhere to get to. Needing to get somewhere is just more attachment. Its a mistake to get attached to or expect enlightenment. It will hinder your practice. Meditation is a continual letting go. It's a very difficult road, and many give up when they realise that they aren't attaining blissful heightened states or the so called "enlightenment". In my own experience meditation has helped me to see very clearly the ways in which I have been deluding myself, the suffering I have caused my self and just how attached I am to so many things ie it has helped me to really see things as they are and that's not always pretty. It has been a painful journey but also rewarding. I have reached Samahdi only a few times over the space of about 5-6 years and only when on retreat. Each time was very joyous and blissful experience but I really had to let go of these experiences as they became a hindrance for me ie they are very moreish and can become a source of distraction when sitting because you can start to want and expect them like a drug and this is not the purpose of meditation. I don't even care or think about enlightenment or awakening. Its really doesn't even matter. They are just more words and concepts. It's like a carrot on a stick really. Keep chasing it and it will always be beyond your grasp.

In what way is it a treasure? This sounds like a Christian view. It's neither a failure or a treasure. It just is what it is. One day you haven't had sex and so your super curious to find out what all the fuss is. The next you realise its way over rated and it's just another drug people are using to distract themselves.

Sex is over rated. The older you get the more you realise it. I actually find it quite repulsive a lot of the time.

You're bored because basically you are not being mindful. You are lost in the future. You are thinking that there is some better moment somewhere else, doing something else instead of accepting what is in this moment. You may also need to connect with others. We can become bored when we need connection. Every single moment will never happen ever again. When we slow down and are truly mindful then we see what is happening right now. It cannot be boring.

Yes it's all subjective however when you live in abject poverty and squalor and sell your own child into prostitution so you can eat or when your family are blown up in a war or your sister gang raped etc etc I'm pretty sure it's not going to feel very subjective. Things happen in the world that cause a lot of pain. Ultimately yes it is up to us how we interpret such things. If we choose to stay stuck and wallow in the pain or if we can somehow integrate what has happened and keep finding a reason to live. Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. I'm not there yet. I'm nowhere near there. Are you?

Sounds like perfectionism. Maybe you are setting your standards too high and looking too far ahead. Set the goal then Just do the next step and forget it. Enjoy the process because you never get there. There is nowhere to get. The goal posts move all the time. The most successful people in life are often effected by the impostor syndrome. They have limiting beliefs that they are hacks or phoneys. The truth is nobody has a fucking clue what they are doing. We are all just muddling through this thing called life. Ride lightly in the saddle and enjoy it. If your perfectionism is crippling seek some help.

I wouldn't say there is no joy in the world. If there is sadness then there must also be joy. It's true that there is nothing in this world that can ever bring any lasting or permanent satisfaction or happiness because everything is impermanent however this is not to say that we cannot appreciate and enjoy things while they last, including happiness. The trick is to do it with non attachment but of course humans get attached to things very easily and so we end up suffering when we lose what we love. The Buddha taught of the three marks of existence - Dukha, Anicca and Annatta or unsatisfactoriness, impermanence and not self. This is really helpful in understanding the nature of the conditioned world. He also taught of the three poisons by which we are all affected and which also cause us so much suffering - greed, hatred and delusion.

Lorcan I have to say I am really impressed and amazed by your wisdom for such a young person. You are only 14 and you are doing so well. Good on you. When I was 14 I didn't have clue. The internet didn't exist though so the information was not freely available like it is today.

I have proscrastinated chronically for decades. You can quite literally waste your life this way. Awareness is great but just observing when you do it isn't enough to change it because of the nature of procrastination. You can't sit and do nothing to stop yourself doing nothing. I think investigating why you do it is key. What are you avoiding? Rejection? Failure? Being busy? Being not good enough? Feeling uncomfortable? There is a reason or reasons why you are avoiding. If you don't think you can change it alone, it's important to get some help. I have therapy and have begun exploring the root of the problem. Unless you get to the root and understand it then how can you change?

This is just your belief. Just another concept.

A very good free online book that has helped me on the journey - Essentials of insight meditation practice And this is a good basic instruction - How to practice vipassana meditation

Leo is very big on having cause and purpose and helping people find these. I'm finding what he has to say about this very helpful. Nobody wants to go through life caught up in petty low paid meaningless work. However I can't help but think if everyone was to have some amazing fulfilling work that is their life purpose then who is going to do all the very tedious menial jobs that need doing? They still have to be done by someone. There is garbage collection, cleaning etc etc.. These jobs may be seen by some as petty and mediocre but they are actually very important jobs that need to be done. Without them we would live in chaotic filth. Is it really realistic that everyone should have meaningful fulfilling work?

Ive noticed Leo uses language sometimes that comes across as quite aggressive. In particular he throws the word "should" out there a lot which can be damaging to our self relationship and relationship with others. Some people may need a tough speaking coach to give them a boot up the arse but generally I find the style a bit sanctimonious. Having always been rather anti-authoritarian I dont appreciate the aggression in some of the talks. Heres an interesting article from the huff post on why we need to use the word "should" a lot less. Stop saying the word should

Agreed. There is a lot of really great stuff to take on and the stuff that doesn't resonate I leave. I come from more of a Buddhist perspective. Kindness and gentleness towards self and others is very important. I get that some people feel they need a boot but it doesn't work for me personally. Makes me rebel more. I prefer a gentle but firm approach. Having said that I am enjoying the life purpose course so far.

Hi doubld, ok here's the thing - you are 18. And you want everything now. Life just doesn't work like that. I understand how much you want to change and that is a really great thing which will take you far but there are no quick fixes. Meditation is not a fix, spiritual retreats are not a fix. I actually think you are a perfect candidate for Leos life purpose course because you want to change so much. You sound like you have a strong sense that there is something for you that's better than where you are. This will drive you to persist with the work required. I have just signed up and I am finding it enormously helpful and inspiring. I am 30 years older than you. Imagine if you signed up now and begun on this journey. By the time you're my age you are going to be so ahead of the game. But you need to start. To take the first step. Im in my late 40s and I had a very disfunctional upbringing just like you. Actually it was worse. I was not only physically and emotionally abused by both parents but I was also severely bullied and ostracised at school. This led to all sorts of problems for me including drugs. What has helped me over the last 5 years has been Buddhism. It has helped me understand so much about why things are the way they are which helps me to let go. To recognise unskillful thinking and craving which leads to suffering. Don't get me wrong, I am still a work in process, still have problems and shitty days but I see things more clearly now. I don't want to preach to anyone because we must all find our own path but if nothing else is working for you maybe have a look into Buddhas view of life. If it works for you great if not you have lost nothing. Here's a link to website where you can read up and do a free study guide. Let me know how you go. I wish you all the best and hope you find the true happiness and deep peace you are seeking. Buddhist teachings

Not offended just not really into the authoritarian thing. I get what you're saying but just don't personally subscribe to that view.

Totally. This guy needs to seriously get a clue and actually listen to what is said before going on a rant.

This may be true for you but it doesn't change the fact that cities are destructive polluting machines. Products of a disconnected capitalist throwaway society obsessed with the economy. They are designed to disconnect and enslave people to keep them producing and consuming. As soon as you can no longer produce ie the elderly, the disabled, the homeless, the mentally ill, you will be discarded like a worthless piece of trash. We must all take responsibility for our own lives and if we are unable to change a situation we are unhappy in then we can change our minds and make the most of it. 'Wherever you go there you are' and 'it is what it is' but let's not deny the damage we are causing on this earth. We don't need to live in massive concrete megalopolis' We have been funnelled and lured into them by the hope that we can make money to survive. I don't see any other reason for their existence.

Im with you frog. The city is like a cancer on the land and we are the ones causing it. The sad part is that we are/have lost touch with nature. It's like we are disconnected from it. We think it's something to conquer, something to rape and pillage rather than something we are a part of. I too have a strong urge to move into the wilderness. Cities are like mobile/cell phones. People have forgotten how to live without them. Forgotten that it was not long ago they did not even exist. Now they are iPhone zombie wage slaves wandering mindlessly in a concrete cage.

I'm not sure there is an answer. People can try to answer or explain but its not something that can be understood through thought or reasoning. By the way I'm just repeating what others have said in books I have read.

Intellectual understanding is not the same thing as deep insight. We can all read a book and think wow yes I get it. But to have deep profound insight into the nature of reality requires effort and practice. For some people it can come suddenly especially as the result of a massive crisis such as it did for Eckharte Tolle but for most of us it requires work. I have had several awakening experiences in which I have glimpsed the true nature of reality but I am not enlightened. I don't meditate because I think I need to anyway. I meditate because I experience the benefits it produces.

For me if I can just find a way to want to get out of bed and feel excited about the day ahead because I am adding something positive to the world, being creative, and in the process making enough money to look after my needs, save a bit and donate a bit then I will have found my purpose. I am so not there. I don't even have a job and have been financially dependant for so long on my partner that I have lost any interest in even looking for work. Currently laying in bed writing this with my usual "cannot be bothered" attitude. I have signed up for Leos course so I'm hoping it will help me snap out of it and change. I know there is no such thing as miracles or an easy quick fix but I think the talks will help me see things a bit differently. I'm late 40s now and when I was younger I had dreams of being an entertainer but I never made them happen. I tried, not hard enough but I did try. I even did some gigs and recorded an Ep but I lacked the confidence, motivation, social skills and so I never followed through, honed my craft, built connections etc. The only reason I can think of why I have not made my dreams a reality is because at school I was severely bullied and ostracised and then my home life was abusive and chaotic also and so I developed severely maladaptive defense mechanisms. I begun to see the world as something I needed to protect myself from. I trusted nobody. I became socially anxious and the fear of rejection was so great that I let it dictate my actions. This is not an excuse but a reason to try and understand where I went wrong. My self esteem and confidence was so low that the slightest rejection felt life threatening to me. My 17 year relationship has now broken down largely because of the way I am. I have been what feels like half dead for many years. It feels comfortable now. Im scared. I don't want to die a depressed unfulfilled person but unless I do the work and change its going to happen.

To get rid of him? What exactly do you mean by "get rid of"? Sounds a bit extreme.

I have to say that after watching the video I feel so much more clear about what has been happening to me. I have meditated twice daily for over 5 or 6 years now. I have also attended some silent retreats. I have felt so lost and have visited many forums asking people why I don't feel happy and where I'm going wrong. But nobody has ever explained it to me as clearly as Leo did in this video. Now I know it's ok and that everything is as it should be.

Have you watched Leo's video on depression? And the also the stop being a vicitm ones? They really really struck a chord with me and touched me very deeply. In fact it was a the boot up the arse I needed. Just listening to him speak of these issues has made something change inside me. What you're saying reminds me of myself. This is kind of how I have been seeing myself also. Through a negative filter. You don't realise you are doing it. But you are. You don't need to anymore. It's time to awaken. Start to see yourself as you truly are and life as it truly is. You are not this story you are telling yourself. You are so much more. Find out how to live a meaningful life with purpose. You can do it. I know you can. If I can, you can. If Leo can we all can.