ajasatya

the love i experience is an intense happiness due to the fact that i am alive right now. it's impossible to experience it if you haven't subjected your mind to a training process yet because the unconsciously conditioned mind is attached to the past and/or the future. thus you experience neediness, loneliness, remorse, fear and anxiety. if the mind is consciously conditioned to pay attention to what you are right now, then you will be content and peaceful. anger will be transformed into tenderness and neediness will be transformed into contemplation. if you ask me what to do, the best thing i can do is tell you what i did. i subjected myself to a rigorous zen training. meditation (zazen) routine, present mind practice throughout the day, lots of zen readings and retreats. thanks, @Loreena. suffering + pointers like the ones i'm giving saved my life.

you want me to list things that i should expect from a relationship and that's the problem because i don't expect anything. i just want to express how affectionate i can be. i don't want to get anything FROM it. i don't even NEED a relationship. it's a bonus in my life because i'm already complete. in fact, everyone is already complete but people are convinced otherwise.

insanely beautiful words.

my relationships, including my intimate one of course, are means to my deepest expression of Love, which goes beyond thinking and words, reaching gestures and acts. relationships as means to reach Love are egoistic and entail suffering. Love must be the ground foundation and relationships arise from it.

@Rebecc yes it can be lonely for a while until you learn how to be your best company. then loneliness transforms into solitude, which is the ground foundation for peace, emotional maturity and deeper learning.

@TJM1959 we're here to invite you to master yourself without attachment to your self. it's normal to feel anxiety everytime we notice things that we're better off dropping.

i mean work on YOUR OWN happiness. the best thing you can do is being an example. maybe an inspiration.

@AlexB wake up completely.

@Life Coach it's not for me lol when people i know get closer to me and start to see how my daily happiness flows, they become inspired to engage in a meditation habit and work towards liberation themselves. we can't say that studying the daily practice of someone else works for everyone but it does work for many people.

@blacksapp ask things you ask yourself and things you want to know about her. ask then listen. ask then listen.

@Psychonaut it happens because you're not practicing mindfulness properly yet. you'd have to be able to appreciate every moment with complete delight. expand your meditation practice.

@tyy personally i don't think it helps in any way towards liberation. when i practiced it, the mind tried to associate its egoic patterns (my personality) with the behavior of some wild animal, which is just another form of attachment to a limited identity. you see, the whole problem comes down to calming the mind's activities. and this is all you really need in order to find peace and compassion. i'd recommend zazen instead, which is solely about experiencing no-mind. my ultimate suggestion is that you find a zen sangha where you live, because zen practitioners actually know what they're doing. i've checked your profile and it says "ontario". ready to follow the trail?

@OhHiMark you're still carrying the attitude of a people pleaser with you. you're always trying to attract or please "others" and this desire/discontentment entails tensions. this constant discomfort about yourself can be sensed by "others". it sounds like you have a lot of work to do towards liberation from narcissism and pride. i wish you the best.

anatomy and yoga iyengar's guide for yoga practice (no pictures) pdf for iyengar's book (with pictures)

@Alex K this is what i did: i threw myself into the pool of yoga. asanas, ayurveda diet, ancient scriptures, singing mantras with hare krishna devotees, studying anatomy and the science of hatha yoga. now i'm a healthy person.

@John Flores some past traumas live in the present moment without us noticing it. they exist as suppressed emotions, blocking the healthy flow of feelings that we, human beings, are supposed to experience. thus, it is an ignorant attitude to deny their existence and go on living carrying that memory registered in our body in some form of tension. let the boy do his shadow work toward complete relief while he's young. the older we are, the more shadow work there's to be done and the harder it is to reach the pain we need to let go of harsh experiences. @Afonso you're doing a great job. reach complete presence and let go of the past. walk like a clean crystal. only Love arises from that state.

good job. this is the real work that everyone tries to avoid. keep going and have a clean life.

sincerity CANNOT be faked. if you actually start practicing complete honesty in your life, you'll see the same phenomenon happening to you. it has nothing to do with being better or worse than someone else. it's about having the courage to always confront one's own bullshit.

@aryberry yes, it's ok. i feel good when there's nothing to do, but i don't care about what people think/say about me. i am completely mediocre. my life is slow. i have a simply life. my body is healthy and my mind is steady. i just need a job to buy food and pay for a place to live.

dear @barry, i'm going to resume 2 important points that were already said by @Evilwave Heddy and @Guivs . you can practice meditation anytime, even when you're not sitting. cleaning the floor, drinking tea, washing dishes, brushing teeth, walking. be present and simply do what you're doing without thinking about something else. watch your body sensations and do everything mindfully. be presence itself. this is the way of zen. there's no place for self-inflicted suffering if you train with your heart like this. consistency is more important than plenty time sitting in meditation in one go. there's nothing wrong about increasing the time of your sitting meditation practice. but make sure that you do it everyday and expand your practice throughout the day in other activities as i already said. when your life becomes a giant meditation practice, no matter what you're doing, that's enlightenment. freedom and presence at any state. complete liberation. don't think of us as advanced meditators. the proper mental attitude comes from the eternal beginner. there's nothing to carry.

@Phil we're welcome

@Orange i have. the healing process consists on starting a meditation routine and getting in touch with that pain. don't think about the reason. don't justify yourself nor play the victim. just feel the pain. be the pain. stop running away. it's the perfect moment to grow up. loving someone else is impossible if you cannot find the source of love within yourself.

it is most people's need. it's just another way to strengthen the illusion of a self. people try to fill an empty void with what's not there (and cannot be). it is a massive illusion. it requires suffering to be kept alive and leads to more suffering when it all falls apart. if your happiness depends on that you're pretty much screwed. my recommendation is that you should drop the pursue for external sources of happiness. there are several ways to do it. the practice of zen worked (and works) greatly for me. it's very simple. if you cannot find peace in solitude, it's impossible to find peace.

@Rocky the only way for you to have your question answered is by going through a profound purification process, which would take years. maybe decades. until then you'll be trapped in this line of thought because that's just you being sincere about what you really feel right now.