AlwaysBeNice

It just triggers feelings that are still suppressed in the subconscious, the sound/visual data is just shaping a neutral movie.

If you look right you can sometimes you can see kids, even babies, being completely aware of other people's ego's at such a deep level and mischievously playing with them, meanwhile the adults have no clue a master is playing with them

Allow the panic, that's when breakthroughs happen, that's when you can see all the fear and see it for the illusion it is, it's not uncommon for people to awaken that way.

Being reminded just of the fact that YOU and EXISTENCE exists can be immensely confrontational. Because you are not really happy, you don't live in the natural state, in unconditional love, but being completely used and identified with a normalized character burdened under it's own emotional suppression we almost all learned through our parents, friends etc. So congratulations, now do the workless work consistently and become infinitely more happy than you could have imagined.

Awakening can be described an instant recognition, a massive insight that shifts you permanently. Enlightenment in my view is when one has also cleared all his old baggage and embodies and radiates that light to a high degree (literally physically, electromagnetically, I've seen some teachers have amazing effects with this). They go hand in hand, when you have no baggage you can let go super easily and when you awaken you can let go of baggage more easily. Edit: As to why, you can't answer that.

There are soo many. But I like David Spero a lot. ('stuck' is not some fearful term used here btw)

Nice songs Maybe we can make this thread into one of with songs with lyrics only OP? (a mod can change the title also I think) Because there is already a huge thread of music but so many people have posted their favorite nice sounding ambient tune which I think made it not as good as it could be, because all music is spiritual already generally somewhat, but what tends to separate all music and music for this vibe are it's lyrics (though I must admit, some lyricless music can be super deep as well).

Because life is also fucking exciting, a thousand times more so when you can be your natural self

It's not so strange, the breath is the subtle bridge to the inner body and mind/emotion are always connected to it, so when you let go, it returns to it's natural rhythm which means purging out anything that's unnatural (suppressed emotions), so yeah held in fears and stuff will come up and you have to learn to welcome them again. Maybe just switch to self-inquiry or what ever and switch the practices when it becomes too frustrating, and of course set a timer for each practice and just do it for x amount of time so your mind doesn't weasel out so easily.

It's same mind. I know what you mean, altered states can be hard to remember sometimes but the more you open your mind sober the more higher states and memories thereof are accessible.

No deaths have been reported on 5-MeO aside from someone mixing it with maoi. It's not really dangerous for your breath to slow down to big degrees for a few sec, you can hold your breath for minutes. In my experience it's not an anesthetic at all by the way.

I've had 2 hellish kind of mushroom trips in the past, and while they were terrifying at the time for some time that you think might or will probably last forever, it's also in a sense not at all so bad as to how it sounds, because it was just a fictional story of your mind that didn't turn out to be true.

They both lead to being here and now.

Surprises are a part of life and enlightened beings still experience, same for excitement. But it's true that the neurotic needy will experience less magic, because they can't go with the flow.

Finally, after having been primarily known only unhappiness, lost-ness, unlovedness, unworthiness, most of my life a sense of profound discovery of my heart is has started, to discover that I am wonderful and sweet inside, and that life is actually a sweet wondrous place, that I am never alone but always held in divine playful loving intelligence, and I am just getting started.

Yeah, the established state should be one of perfection, which may be called 'bliss', Adyashanti also has a cool quote on this: 'Who cares if you have bliss when you have love'. David Spero also speaks about it nicely:

Nice, but getting the intellectual part is the easy part, important, but only so much of the story, if it doesn't come to integration through emotional/insight practice, it can, and often will, inflate the ego that was already based on delusion/suppression, and Kanye has his fair share of that too. I've seen quite a few celebrities are waking up too, Kesha a bit, Katy Perry, seen some big actors talking about it recently of which I can't remember the names. And so the fire spreads, because celebrities will not only wake up massive amounts of people, but also their celebrity friends (many of whom probably crave it given they will see success isn't making them too happy), whom will in turn wake up many.

Trap of falling into worship?? 'God created to the universe to worship itself', love is the highest gift, use it.

Allow emotions, put your attention on feeling/being the self, the witness rather than onto fearful thought streams as best as you can while being compassionate towards yourself

And then you regenerate

Some follow up of the two 5-MeO trips (one a few days ago as seen above, one a few weeks ago, 2x10 mg and 1x 20mg, interestingly enough the 10mgs were almost stronger than the 20mg as I let go even less in my little dorm room, but still very strong and insightful). I have also been meditating or practicing mindfulness diligently for almost the entire day aside from a few hours of internetting a day, am on unemployment welfare, 21 y/o. - Meditations have gone noticeably deeper just like last time but not as much yet. -Third eye has opened up more (clearer vision, saw a dancing white light in nature in the corner of my eye the other day, saw some puffs of some white smoke that kept appearing in front of my during meditation even when I looked at it, I could not trace it to any plant or what ever, and just a more dmt-like vision during the day (been seeing stuff slightly for years but it's now actually coming on). - Had very vivid lucid dreams, one very personal awesome dream with my father, one just weird one, another just weird one that went on for hours, was very vivid very lucid, could experiment with letting out my hurt ego, was nice. -More very trippy moments in dreams, like 'uh wooooww', for a moment, like experiencing a little bit of ego death or very psychedelic state - Weed was definitely much stronger and also made some noticeable impact on the acceleration on all of the above. - Great insights as to my pysche/fears, as how some trauma of my father manifested itself as a deep fear of God and created a neurotic mind towards it and towards other people (needing to be a certain way), I feel like I'm very close to letting go of this deep knot (manifested as deep constant physical tension around my root chakra too). - Had one dream tonight wherein the 5-MeO was just as strong, if not stronger as the 20mg of last time and I almost let go, it's not leaving me alone, at all! (I've practiced lucid dreaming for a few years between 16-18, and let it go on automatic ever since, which is why I am a little more aware than most people by default, but sometimes I don't remember dreams at all (which means they were mundane or perhaps too deep), so yeah) But the third eye/dream stuff is not really important at all compared to emotional healing and Self discovery and it will follow automatically through spiritual practice, though being conscious of it and practicing WILD adds a new nice layer to things, but it's pretty challenging to practice WILD, and aside from that, there's not much to do aside from remembering them when you just wake up.

Not consciously enlightened, but what I found to help a lot is to understand the negative ego (or part of it): it's just a protective system you designed as a child to deny emotions that we've learned to suppress because they were too real for this world. Learning to find your emotional side, nurturing it and learning to express it again can really open you up. So don't try to fight the negative ego, accept it and release it. These suppressed parts are also at the root of distraction thinking/fake personality/action patterns. Suppressed emotions tend to crop up during the letting go process of being the Self in my experience, so realizing the Self and doing this healing work seems to go hand in hand. (This also explains also why young children are naturally happy (the natural state/emotionally open) and why 3-4 out of 5 suicides are done by men in the west (stronger taboo on emotions). Also all the suppressed emotions can be found in chronically tight muscles along the spine that hurt when you press them).

meetup.com

It also happens naturally as we stop our distracting thinking/doing patterns, meditation. But.. so what you can't see something or whatever, they are no there to judge you and even if they did, does it matter?