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Maybe i'm missing your point, but the difference between thinking and being aware of thinking is quite simple and not very hard to understand. Being aware of thinking = thinking, but mindfully observing those thoughts as they arise and pass away. Thinking = thinking and not realising you're thinking, and then often getting lost in those thoughts. I don't understand how you can forget how to be aware of your thoughts. Just sit silently and put your attention on your thoughts as they arise and pass away.

He's not aggressive, he's just playing around. Although I did feel a little sorry for the guy asking the question haha.

Why was it only 45 minutes of meditating? Most of the time its pretty easy to stay focused for 60 minutes. But if you do loose focus before the end, rather than just 'sticking it out', take a deep breath, correct your posture and try to resettle back into the meditation technique. If you're not actually being mindful and observing your thoughts and feelings, or whatever your object is, during that last period, then 15 minutes of 'non-meditative resolve' is a waste of time in my books.

SDS is not about grinding your way through a meditation session. The key is to remain mindful throughout the whole experience, particularly near the end when thoughts about quitting, the timer etc, and intense physical pains start arising. When those those sorts of things arise you've got to remain as the equanimous unattached observer, meaning you're not judging or favouring any experience over another. Noice the aversion and desire to change what's occurring. Just sit, maybe smile a little, and just watch the thoughts and feelings arise to the best of your ability. If you start having feelings of boredom or restlessness, observe and notice them, don't be controlled by them. Then re-settle back into your meditation. Take a deep breath and re-focus your attention. Another tip is to intentionally make sure that your timer is correctly set before starting the meditation. For example, I use my phone for a timer, and always make sure it's either charging and/or has a lot of battery. Then I also watch the timer start for a few seconds. Very simple, but it makes a big difference because you know for certain that you set your timer correctly and that it won't stop half way through.

@SaltyMeatballs If you don't experience any intense physical pain then there should be no reason why you can't sit for 2 hours, if that's what you really want to do. Not saying that it's easy by any means. Very few normal people are capable of that. But it's definitely possible, particularly if you've been meditating for a number of years. The body is more than capable of sitting in the same position for a long period of time. It's just the mind that is restless. So you need to think about how to prepare for that. Try just going up in small 5 minute increments. Seeing as your best is 75 minutes, commit to sitting for 80 and set a clear intention to do so. Anticipate the resistance and the excuses to quit that the mind will come up with, and be prepared for it. You don't want to be grinding your way to 2 hours though. Mindfulness and equanimity is key, not unconscious resistance.

Only way to overcome social anxiety is to expose yourself to more, preferably uncomfortable, social situations. If you spent the next month talking to a group of strangers one-on-one every single day then I guarantee you would not have the problems you describe. I have very similar issues at the moment, but thats just because I spend most of the time on my own or with close friends and family. I rarely meet new people, so when I do the social anxiety goes through the roof. But I know that it's not a fixed or permanent characteristic. It fluctuates depending on the amount of practise I have. So it'll be the same for you. It just takes work and effort to overcome it. In the mean time, here's a interesting article/video with some useful and practical advice for people with social anxiety. Starts at around 30:43 https://www.personalpowermeditation.com/social-anxiety-advice-from-scott-adams/

@Slade Interesting report. I eat a whole-food vegan diet, so I always get a little triggered when I see people talking about raw meat diets but i'm not here to criticise or hate. I'm always open to new information and opinions. If your body feels good from eating more meat then go for it. It's becoming quite clear to me that some people just don't do well on a plant based diet. A fully plant based diet is not for everyone unfortunately. I'm unsure exactly as to why this is. I'm sure the huge varieties in body physiology, quality of foods, environments etc around the world will all play a part. I assume atleast some people who start a plant based diet just aren't eating enough calories and/or getting the required nutrients/vitamins. But there's certainly some people who even if they are eating a sufficiently healthy plant-based diet, they still don't do well. Clearly you are one of them. Maybe some people just can't extract the necessary nutrients from plants as well as other people. Saying this, I doubt that a fully raw animal food diet is the solution. Just introduce some organic free-range beef or some organic chicken into your diet a few times a week. Surely that is a more sustainable, healthy, nutritious, and importantly tasty diet? Are you telling me you'll never eat a fresh ripe mango, or a freshly picked vine tomato ever again? My god, I couldn't imagine it. Here are my immediate concerns (albeit assumptions) with a raw animal food diet: Surely there are some serious long-term negative health effects? It's highly unethical. Are we really built to eat raw animals foods? I'm skeptical, but I could be wrong. Surely the raw meat and god forbid the rotten meat tastes like hell?

@okulele Dayum, that sounds intense! I imagine just the dark room retreat alone would have been a powerful experience, but ending it with a LSD trip as well! Sounds like you handled it well though, and got a lot of out of it... or rather let a lot go. Thanks for sharing.

Firstly, it's a tricky question because enlightenment is not just a black and white thing. It's very complex and multifaceted. So in that respect it's difficult to come to a clear answer. By what criteria is an animal or person enlightened? Is it simply a lack of ego? Or is there much more that is required? It also depends on the animal. A lone wolf or bear probably has much stronger sense of self than an ant which is part of a huge colony. Don't assume that animals don't have an ego. They may very well have an ego, but it's likely not anywhere near as highly developed as the human ego, purely from the fact that their brains are not nearly as large or complex. They still exhibit many self-survival and egoic behaviours which you could argue suggests that some form of ego is present. But even if it is only humans who have developed an ego, would a lack of ego in an animal make it 'enlightened'? I don't really know. My guess is no. Are animals directly conscious of what they truly are? Do they walk around in a permanent state of non-dual awareness? Are they even capable of being conscious of whats True?

@Charlotte Do you have any idea where I could learn about dosage? Cross reference information from all of these websites: TripSit, PsychonautWiki, Erowid, Disregard Everything I Say, Reddit, and reading Trip Reports. Looks as if it will take some research to learn how to use it. Am I right in purchasing this one? No research is required. Instructions provided with the kit are very clear and simple. Yes that is the right one, test kit 4

@Charlotte LSD or mushrooms? It's all about the dose. Just start small and you'll be fine. But it'll be intense. Mushrooms don't last as long as LSD, so from that perspective they might be better for first timers (was for me). How do you know you've bought legitimate psychedelics? Test with a kit: https://www.safetest4.co.uk/which-reagent-test-kit How long are you out of action for? Depends on the dose but usually 1-2 days. A small dose of mushrooms and you'll be perfectly fine the next day. Is there prep to be done before hand? Check out the Leo's video. He covers most of the prep you should do before hand:

@egoless I do have experience yes. They are saturated, there's no doubt. But if you know what you're doing they can still be viable options. Just understand that despite what you see on the internet, they are not get-rich-quick schemes. A very small handful of people get lucky and/or just time it perfectly, but realistically for most people they both take an enormous amount of time and effort, and in the case of FBA, a lot of up-front money (unless you get lucky). Not trying to put you off, just stating the facts. If you are serious about it you should buy a course, but don't be spending any more than $500. I'd probably advise you to go for a course that not many people have bought, because otherwise you're doing exactly the same thing as 10,20,30 thousand other people. DM me if you want some more advice. I'd rather not disclose all my secrets to a whole new community of people.

Yes I have had the same issue. Did 20mcg plugged and didn't really get much from it. Maybe we bought from the same source. Where abouts are you from, if you don't mind me asking? DM me if you want.

Awesome! Looking forward to it

Leo, after reading a bunch of your recent comments I get the impression you have had some deep awakening experiences recently. Are you in a permanent state of non-dual awareness now? Whats your baseline level of consciousness? Would be v interested to hear about it.

@Shan What word you use for the label is not overly important, and there isn't a definitive list of labels to use, it's just what you prefer and find easiest. For example, Shinzen Young uses very simple labels like "Hear", "See", "Feel", "Gone" (all four of those will cover every single aspect of your experience, both 'inner' and 'outer'). Other meditation teachers will tell you to use more specific words that describe the experience, for example, "Itching", "Burning", "Birds", "Aversion", "Wanting", "Anger", "Planning" etc. There are pros and cons of both approaches. Shinzen's technique is easy and puts more focus on the actual observation of experience (which is the whole point), but the second technique I mentioned can provide deeper insight into the workings of your mind, your neurosis etc. The labelling wants to be quick, simple and effortless. You don't want to be spending loads of time thinking about what the most appropriate word or set of words is. It should really just be one word in my opinion, but i've read of techniques where multiple words are used. The whole point is conscious observation, and labelling is just used to facilitate that, so don't over do it.

Be carefull because it sounds like you're just blindly believing everything Leo says, and even then not actually understanding it properly. You need to realise that everything you're writing about is purely conceptual. All your ideas about 'enlightenment', about 'infinity', about 'consciousness', about 'nothingness' are all not what they are referring to, and are all just thoughts that are, to a certain degree, no use to you at all. They are guidelines that should be understood, but held loosely and not mistaken for whats actually true. This is all false and just assumptions that you're making about something which you have no direct experience of. You don't realise that you don't exist right now. There is no self right now, yet you still enjoy sex, family and everything else. Sensory and emotional pleasure are not affected by spiritual awakening. If anything you will enjoy them 100x more. 'I'm just consciousness' is just a thought, a belief. Drop it. You don't know what you are.

@Ruth As Soulbass said, it takes a while to change your eating habits. In some cases you can make changes over night, but for the most part its a gradual process. The easiest way to go about it, in my opinion, is to just focus on one thing at a time. Don't try to stop eating sugar, dairy, wheat and processed foods all at once. Next time you crave some sugary food, be mindful of the craving, observe the sensations and thoughts and then let it pass. As Leo says, Awareness is curative. If you crave sugary foods after a meal, try going for some fruit. Also, learn easy recipes with few ingredients. Few ingredients is the key to making cooking easy. And cooking/preparing meals yourself it the easiest way to stay healthy. If it's dairy you want to cut out, try testing out various nut milks and using them every now and then so that you gradually get used to them. That's what I did. Took a while to completely swap cows milk out, but it worked.

I used to have this. Sometimes just thinking about blushing would trigger a blush. It always happened in social settings, or when I was in crowds of people like on the train or city tube, which of course made it even more embarrassing. I believe it happens simply because you're overly self-conscious, lack a lot of self-confidence and are too concerned with what other people think about you. Don't take this as criticism or a definitive description of who you are. It may be a combination of all of them or just one. Or maybe something else entirely. But I think those are the main causes. Here's my advice. Firstly, try not to over think it. Blushing isn't a massive deal, and most people don't really care. I understand it's different in school when you know everyone, but try not to make it into a big deal with yourself when it happens. When you do blush, just relax and remind yourself to just be ok with it. Make friends with it! Remind yourself that it's quite normal. Recognise that it's a very short body reaction that'll pass in a few minutes. And if people make fun of you for it, don't react in any way at all. Also, I would advise you to stop trying to 'get rid' of the blushes because it may just be making things worse. If you're constantly thinking about getting rid of them (particularly when they happen) or intentionally trying to not blush then it's likely to happen more often. Atleast that's what I found. To overcome this you must just accept that it's happening and be completely ok with it. Whenever you start feeling anxious about blushing or thinking about it in any way just be ok with those thoughts, let them do their thing, and then move on. Meditation can help I think. Just becoming more mindful of your thought patterns will help. Some deeper spiritual insights will also be beneficial because you will become less egoic and less self-centered, and therefore probably less concerned with what other people think of you. This has been the case for me. I still blush occasionally though. But also so do many other people. I'm not sure that things like NoFap, affirmations or visualisations would directly decrease the amount of blushing, but they can certainly make you more confident, improve your self-esteem, etc which will definitely help. Don't be disheartened though. It's just a phase. Accept and be ok with whatever happens. Hope this helps.

@AuthenticMeli Hello, welcome to the forum!

@lmfao Try dividing your time into chunks/boxes. Set aside however long you need, 30 mins, an hour, 2 hours or whatever. Be very specific and set a timer for that amount of time. Then set an intention to work completely focused and uninterrupted for that period of time. Turn off, get rid of and move away from all distractions. Using time blocks makes doing the more grindy/boring tasks easier because you've given yourself a clear start and end point and all you have to think about is the actual work. It also means you've got clear break/rest periods. Try to make a little bit of progress each day and eventually you'll have gotten through all the textbooks you need to read and study. Don't think about everything that you have to know before the exams because that'll just swamp your mind and make you much less likely to sit down and work. Focus on studying small sections at a time. Break it all up. This is the key. Break things up until they are manageable. Don't try thinking about the whole until the very end when you've studied all the parts. If you ever find yourself completely unable to start working/studying due to lack of motivation, tell yourself just to do 5 minutes of the work. The hardest part is starting so by doing 5 minutes you eventually find yourself continuing on with the studying. Works every time. Goodluck! You know you can do it.

@Dhruv Just go now. Anyone above the age of 18 would be capable of doing it. Bear in mind that if you haven't meditated before it will be a challenge. It's difficult, gruelling and hardwork even for people who have done a lot of meditation. Don't go into it thinking it'll be a breeze, or that you'll get all your shit sorted out in 10 days. But it can be a very productive and rewarding experience. There have been plenty of people in the past who have attended without any experience whatsover and gotten a lot of out of it.

Check out a video I linked a while back for an sort of guided meditation with Shinzen Young: Watch Leo's guided meditation video called 'Guided Meditation - The Next Level Of Meditation'. I'd say that's pretty much Do Nothing. Sure I can see that being true. In the long run definitely. It's kind of inevitable. But for a lot of people it's only surface level, in my opinion. Watch Matt Kahn for an example of what it truly means to be kind, compassionate and loving. He's all about love. Even an enlightenment won't guarantee that you become super kind and compassionate though. You are inherently self-centered and egotistical after all. I have a sense that it's largely down to your genetics and body/brain physiology. So in most cases just a casual meditation practise is not enough. There's a lot of variables at play. It's difficult for me to advise you to be honest. Plus I don't really know what i'm talking about. I probably shouldn't have said they are the fastest way because that's probably not true for a lot of people. It's true for me though. I've had a lot of growth from psychedelics and energy transmissions. Again, everyone is different and people are suited to different paths. I've never done metta meditation, or loving kindness. I'd imagine they'd be good for someone who already has an open heart.

@WellbeingSeeker I think the main thing is just getting the habit in place. It doesn't matter so much what technique you choose first, because unless you're super lucky and the first thing you try is absolutely perfect for you, then you'll need to experiment over the coming months with various techniques to see which suits you best. This is what Leo talks about a lot. Most people end up just sticking with one technique which isn't suited to them and so they don't see many results. You don't want to be constantly hopping from one technique to the next, but trying different techniques out is quite important in my opinion. There's a a balance that has be figured out. Personally, if I were to recommend a technique it would be 'mindfulness with labelling' (see Leo's video on this and search for Shinzen Young on youtube), or 'do nothing' (again see Leo's video and search the forum as there has been quite a few discussions regarding this technique). Practising either of these will certainly improve your equanimity and your self-control/discipline. When it comes to developing compassion and loving kindness, i'm not sure that a traditional meditation technique like mindfulness will have much effect. Although for some people it may. I would say opening the heart chakra through yoga, psychedelics or energy transmissions is the fastest way to become more compassionate and loving. So you want to get the habit of sitting down to meditate in place first. This is the hardest part and you'll likely face a lot of resistance unless you're a natural. A consistent 20-30 minutes a day is a good place to start. But you want to be quickly moving that up to 45 minutes, and then an hour. But consistency and the quality of the meditation is most important. 20 minutes of really focused, highly concentrated and conscious meditation is better than an hour of lazy mind wandering. Long term, just commit to doing it every day and commit to mastering one technique when you feel it's right for you. It's also a trial and error process that you have to figure out by yourself really.