RossE

@John Flores Interesting, was it hearing what Leo said and connecting this with your experience which made you realise there was no return?

@Bob84 I get that, I didn't mean it in a nihilistic way. I just mean that despite the fact I've had glimpses hasn't really changed what's going on around me. I'm okay with that.

@Bob84 Yes I have, I've had a lot of mini realisations (almost daily recently) and a couple of big moments which have blown my mind. At the same time nothing has really changed - I still experience the same things.

@Telepresent That's a good analogy and I can see what you're getting at. It's mind blowing when it's your entire view of existence at stake!

@Wormon Blatburm I realise that using the terms ego and I in this discussion is delicate! In my direct experience it is as though I now wish to have this truth permanently/be aware or it permanently. Is this because "I" saw through the ego and know that it's not real?

Shinzen Young recommends strong determination sitting. Leo also discusses it here.

I've suffered depression in various spells throughout my life. Now I realise that it was really all my thoughts that were causing it - negative thought patterns, buying into all the crap, living inside my mind and it running me. It seems a bit silly now and I want rid of my identification with thoughts for good. It's quite staggering to realise the negative things that are created in your head. I realise that while there's still the ego that views reality as it does, I will be going about life all wrong, and I may be denying myself happiness the whole time. I don't want to go claiming there's a drive for truth here, but as soon as I heard about enlightenment I was fascinated and hooked. Maybe that's an ego thing, I'm not sure. Whether it is or not hopefully when the ego does really start to resist it will be too late to go back!

Depends who you're comparing with though, are you comparing yourself to your friends, family, colleagues? I've got a long, long way to go. I've definitely grown though and I'm realising things now that I didn't ever before. One time last week I laughed at myself for all the stories being spun in my head when not so long ago I'd have bought into their rubbish and let them get me emotionally. I'd say that if you are arrogant about consciousness then you're not very conscious at all. So being humble is good - you're not tricking yourself and you're leaving room for growth.

Sometimes it will pop into my head, yes. It's quite a strange thing to zoom out when you're talking to somebody and realise you're not actually controlling the talking...

I'm doing 20-30 minutes per day but the questions do pop up throughout my daily life as well. I've noticed that after meditation I usually feel calm and happy, but after self inquiry I feel really shitty for a while after. Anyone else get this too?

Hello from Scotland! I've been on the enlightenment path for 2/3 weeks or so, doing Neti-Neti once or twice a week, self-inquiry daily, meditation daily. In the self-inquiry process I've started to notice that despite trying to "zoom in" and find who I am, who is perceiving etc, I realise after a few minutes I'm not really doing anything at all. I'm still sitting in the same position and my awareness hasn't changed that much, just that the focus is on a certain part of it or is trying to reach a certain part of it. This happens especially when my consciousness dilates - the sensations seem to move from their usual location and I'm left calm, peaceful and detached from thought. It feels like the state occurs without any control and disappears in the same way, but somehow my awareness has changed. When it shifts back I realise that nothing in the surroundings has really changed and I've done nothing to achieve the awareness shift. In this state I can find it difficult to keep looking for who I am. Anybody else experience this? Should I accept this realisation as part of the process or am I doing something wrong? Are we really doing anything at all in self-inquiry?

I've made the self-inquiry habit and I will keep at it. I appreciate all your advice and I'm seeing some things I'm doing wrong, thankyou!

I understand that I'm aiming to disidentify from that belief, and yes it's still there in everyday situations. During meditation less so. Are you saying that even though it might not feel like I'm really doing anything except sifting through my awareness, that this is the key to really not knowing and this is where progress is made?

When Leo refers to meditation with self-enquiry is he talking about Neti Neti or is there a different video where he demonstrates this? EDIT: never mind, found it on his channel.