Chew211

It worked for me recently The approach wasn't even that smooth or anything, but I turned off the logical part of my head, and just went with the flow of the conversation while directing it towards the idea of meeting up with her again. Slept with her on the second date.

I think there's a false dichotomy here. I've been getting into approaching and stuff, and have even gotten my first "success" recently-- I'm by no means an expert, but there's a third way. I've dropped any sort of bad boy act, or even most "game" stuff. However, I'm not a nice guy either. I'm just a guy. I try to form an intimate connection, and that's it. Girls want that too. It's just win-win. I'm not looking to commit to a long term relationship, but I naturally want the girl to be happy, and eventually the relationship will have to come to a healthy end-- where we're both better than when we met. (Not just talking out of my ass, I've done this already). My advice would be to stop being a Niceguy, but don't force yourself to be a badboy. Just own up to your sexuality, work on improving your interactions with women, and just have fun.

I want to know if there are anyone here who’s life purpose is to create entertainment. Such as writers, game designers, poets, artists, etc. I saw two of Leo’s videos “Society fucks you in the ass” and “Why you must stop watching TV” he seems to generally say that entertainment is a low consciousness activity, that it is just for our chimp brain. But I know I’ve personally experienced many stories that moved me emotionally, that made me want to seek higher things in life, hell some of these were anime that had some stupid comedy in them, but the ending was just heart shattering, and all I wanted to do after watching that was go outside and do nothing, and just be, and also let out those emotions. I think one of the beauties of certain stories is that when you start watching it, it appeals to your chimp brain, like everything else, but then once it hooks you like that, it wakes you up. The being awake form it doesn’t last very long, but the inspiration is then there. If there are other entertainers, creators of stories of any kind, and artists, I would like to know. I would like to communicate with you all. I feel that being an entertainer, and also engaging in it could stunt our growth if engaged improperly so to speak. I want to be aware of the pitfalls, I want to hear about other people’s pitfalls.

@iago iriarte arhatha Watching porn doesn't nessecate objectification. Depends on the manner of the individual watching the porn. Pretty much porn isn't a problem. Just like anything in the outside world isn't a problem. The individual is the problem.

@Jhonny agreed actually. Sexual expression is a beautiful thing

8/20 This is my first Self-Actualization Journal Entry. How I got started on my Self-Actualization Journey is a whole ‘nother story. A fun one, definitely one I would like to write about, but irrelevant for this entry. Recently, I had turned 20, and a week later, in the middle of the night, I felt a DEEP DARK FEAR of DEATH. Mainly just try to grasp oblivion,trying to grasp no longer existing. As time went on, I started to notice how much of my life I had been wasting, and I also see so many people wasting it around me. Now this sort downhill mood went away after being strongly present for a week, and then made its comeback every two weeks or so, and then goes away. It was like a mid-life crisis that would recur a little every once in awhile. Today, I decided to commit the the lifelong study of self mastery. I’ve seen a few of Leo’s videos before, and thought the concepts were cool, but I never seriously applied them, nor took any notes, nor integrated it with my overall strategy for life (and at the moment I don’t even have a really developed strategy of life either). But this weekend, I was triggered to take Self-Actualization seriously, and today I made a commitment. I’ve already taken notes on several videos, and today I will strategize to apply them on a daily basis. I know it’s going to be difficult, I also know I don’t know the magnitude of the difficulties yet, I have an idea, but I’m sure I’m greatly underestimating... after all, I’m facing the toughest opponent ever, my ego, my existence, ME. Where am I on Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs? Or rather, what am I lacking on Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs? Physiological Needs - In my physiological needs, I am lacking sex. I’m as virgin as olive oil. This honestly doesn’t really bother me, but I occasionally turn to porn, and I masturbate regularly. I don’t really see a problem with porn and masturbation, however, I’m thinking I might want to cut porn simply because it is a waste of time, as it doesn’t really raise my consciousness or anything. Do I want sex in my life? Yes. But it doesn’t bother me that I don’t have it, hence I’m not working towards getting that in my life. Now some would put sex as a part of a love and belongingness, and I would agree with them. That’s why I’m going to write it down twice, but a different aspect of that “need” not being met. Safety Needs - All my Safety Needs are met. I’m currently a college student. I will be living in an apartment, and when I’m not at college, I am back at home. My parents pay for my college and for my living expenses at the moment. This means my Safety Needs are met until I try to tackle living completely on my own. So I wouldn’t consider my Safety Needs permanently met, but they are completely fulfilled for now. Belongingness and Love Needs - I have great friends, friends that I can talk to about anything, though none of them are Self-Actualizing, nor are they even on the path of self mastery. So, at times, I feel alone. I do want to help my friends and family get on this path, hell, I might even want to help the whole world get on this path (I’ll get to that later when I talk about my life purpose), but I don’t feel I can do that until I myself am seriously on track with this. I think I’m better off focusing on my own development, and producing results, so those closest to me can see it, and do it for themselves. I don’t have any romantic or sexual relationships, nor have I ever had any. This was a big problem for me during my teen years, but as my teen years came to an end, this didn’t bother me too much. My attitude towards this is that I’ll find the right person as I develop into my authentic self. Do I want a romantic relationship that would grow me and the other person? Where we both could explore our sexuality together? Where we both transcend together? (After all, there really is no ME and HER, we’re all one, but to discover that together, aw man, I would LOVE that). Yes, I would like that. Right now though, there’s no one in particular I’m interested in. Esteem Needs - Oh boy. This entire goddamn level could be missing for me I don’t have financial independence. I haven’t gone far into my life purpose, hell, I just started. And even that, I can’t say I TRULY KNOW my life purpose. I could find out I’m wrong. But that’s why I really want to be sure. Once I have figured out my life purpose for sure, then I could go hardcore without doubt in the back of my mind. Self Actualization - Ok, I barely have shit here, so I’ll talk about what I DO have. It’s very little, but a daily meditation habit, that I actually started after watching Leo’s video on meditation back in March (when I first discovered him). Only for the last 60 days have I done it consistently daily, before bed. I hope this adds up over time. Self Transcendance - Yeah, no. What am I to do to permanently plug in those holes in my swiss cheese of a hierarchy? Well I will strategize more on that later (I know, procrastination, sue me), but I believe I gota develop a good systematic approach, and I don’t have that yet. However, a big thing TO fill in these holes would be life purpose. What is my life purpose? Or rather my understanding of it right now? Here’s a long drawn out answer: I’m a writer. I write stories. I have a small company (no money at all coming in, but that’s what I want to grow). My passion is writing stories. All my stories, I recently discovered, I am writing to raise awareness to those reading it (and to myself as I write it). All my stories, though different characters, time period, and genre, are all about the same thing, what that thing is, hard to put into words. I intellectually knew from a young age that all there is, is NOTHING. I intellectually knew that everything is an illusion, and that’s what all my stories is focused around, though each in different ways. I’d give you examples, but I’ll write them first AND THEN tell you guys about it I want my company to release these stories, and I want to release them into many different mediums, not just novels and graphic novels, but also video games, animation, live action, etc. In one of Leo’s videos, he said things like movies, stories, and video games are all chimpery, that all are designed for the lower consciousness. Though this is true for the majority of people, it’s really the manner in which you engage in consumption that matters. I believe that one could actually raise awareness by experiencing certain stories. And the way my stories are structured is that the main character(s) start from low consciousness and go to high consciousness. I want to develop the ability to tap into the reader’s emotions, so I can lead their consciousness upward, as the story progresses. I guess in a way I want to lay a trap, but unlike most traps society places for us, this is meant to expose the readers to a different paradigm than the predominant paradigm most people live in (hell, even I live in it most of the time). So with this journal I will keep track of my development, keep track of my self-experimenting. Every week, I will focus on a concept of one of Leo’s videos. This week I am focusing on the concept of the “How you Lie” Video. I am wearing a yellow rubber band on my wrist, and everytime I look at it, I remember to stay vigilant of my ego’s self agenda. Right now I’m focusing on noticing when I lie, the truly difficult task of destroying my self image must later be strategized, so that it can be done gradually. After all, gradual self improvement is what I committed to, emphasis on gradual. Now as I begin, I must take note of my weaknesses. For one I can fall into laziness. At the moment I’m more neurotically motivated than positively motivated. I am still moralizing. And I sometimes take what Leo says as Black and White, and I think I’m too much influenced by him. Although I intuitively know what he’s saying is true, I believe I still ought to be critical before accepting it. Well, this is all for my first entry. I’ll commit to writing here to keep myself accountable... I know that at this point I’m in danger of slipping into laziness. Thank you @Leo Gura for the work you do, and for constructing this forum. Thank you also for triggering/bullying/harassing/kicking my ass to get me started on this journey. - Varun

Alright. Long time no post... actually just a week But it feels like a really long week because I'm getting so much stuff done. I just watched Leo's video about Ego. Instead of documenting my plan, like I have been doing before (mainly because my habits have been pretty good. I just need to keep them up, they all fit in my daily and weekly plan) I will be focusing on the assignment that Leo gave in the video. "To notice on a very minute to minute, daily level, when I am suffering, and to connect that to the ego. Ask myself how is my identity producing this suffering I am now experiencing in my life." I will do this for the self-development theme for the week. Will post later.

I'm as virgin as olive oil, haven't even kissed someone. BUT give this a try: "Can I kiss you?" you could go more in detail. Write a poem expressing what you want to do. Cheesy as fuck, I know, but authentically express your desire.

Damn, that sounds really cool. I'd honestly like to do that sometime. When I was little, I sort of wished that I was born back in tribal times

I have a different idea. Allow yourself to play video games, accept it. Remove the neuroticism you have around wasting your life away playing video games. you're making hard-core judgments, and they WILL bite you in the ass, and are ultimately counter productive. You're moving away from what you don't want when you really want to be moving towards what you want. So play video games when you feel like it. I personally do, I personally love playing video games HOWEVER I rarely do so nowadays. Why? I'm too busy with my life purpose. So really, all you need to do is focus on what you WANT. REMEMBER the video games themselves aren't good or bad. Nothing is really good or bad. Just focus on your life purpose. DON'T resist. Surrender, allow, accept, love.

Just thought I'd give my input. I was pretty neurotic about getting rid of porn and stuff in the past, YET I still found myself relapsing. And it was difficult. HOWEVER, now I don't even stop myself from porn if I want it, YET I use it way less often now. Try the counter-intuitive way. Instead of trying to resist your porn cravings, accept it. Accept it to the point where you don't attack NOR do you defend it. Literally just accept for what it is. THEN go work on your life purpose. You don't get over porn by fighting it. You get over porn because your busy doing productive, meaningful things, You get over porn, because you just aren't thinking too much about it. Don't beat yourself up, don't demonize, don't judge, don't have any beliefs. Being neurotic about your porn use is its own problem (I would argue that it's a BIGGER problem). Just work on being authentic.

9/2 This week I’ve been having a lot of inspiration and drive. It’s like I suddenly have access to more creative resources. I can do more. However, now I must concern myself with the strategic allocation of those resources so I can get specific projects done. Right now my resources are spread out, I want to focus them on a specific project at a time to finish those projects (which will also allow me to build up my macro momentum, thus giving me more resources). My plan to do this is by focusing on a specific project every week, instead of splitting equal amount of time between ALL my projects every week. When I split everything equally in a short amount of time, then the momentum of each project is lost. I need to focus, and take things one at a time.

8/30 So yesterday I watched Leo’s affirmation video in them morning. Later in the day I was talking to one person who was a part of my company (she edits my writing). We were talking about languages, and she told me that she used instinct more than rules to learn languages, and was able to quickly pick up Japanese, mostly from learning on her own (playing visual novels, listening to songs, etc). Later when I thought about it, I noticed two things about her which made sense as to how she is so good at learning languages. One had to do with affirmations and the other had to do with a theory I came up with called “Resistance Free Learning.” 1. She says “I pick it up fast.” It sounds simple, but she has no limiting beliefs about learning languages, she doesn't say it’s difficult, she doesn’t say it’s a lot of work, rather, it’s something she says comes easy. To her subconscious mind (as well as her conscious mind) language IS easy to pick up on. In order to boost my ability to pick up languages, I will do affirmations. Right now I believe that learning a language takes a lot of time. I’m also narrow minded when it comes to how I go about learning the languages that I am. Her confidence (it’s almost not even confidence, it’s just reality for her), and her open mindedness (instinct, not rules) allowed her to be a natural at languages. If I adopt that mindset, not only would I be able to learn all the languages I want to faster, but it would also be more enjoyable. If I take this general mindset to other areas of my 2. The way she was learning was Resistance Free, meaning that it was full focused on absorbing and using. There was no resistance about getting it right, no neuroticisms, instead, just an appreciation and full genuine interest. If I want to make leaps and bounds of progress, I need to drop a lot of my resistencies. Overall, I don’t need to change what I’m doing right now, I just need to keep an open mind to other methods, an open mind about my skill level, and an open mind about easily picking up languages. I haven’t started an Affirmation Practice, but I might make an affirmation to tell myself that I am a natural at learning languages, or a more general affirmation that would cover that and a lot more. OVERALL (if that editor was here, she’d make a note of repetition here, lol), I want to reprogram my subconscious. I’ve already been doing that since I was young, but now do it consciously and take it to the next level.

8/29 Got a new idea for a video game based off of a dream I had, my friend is the one who catalyzed me into thinking of it more, and finding more depth to it. I won’t get into much detail here, but the game, if made, will be something that is very different for a video game, and there will likely be a lot of resistance from a lot of people. But that’s to worry about later, first to design the entire thing on a paper. MAN, I NEED TO OPTIMIZE MY TIME TO GET MORE DONE. PARADOXICALLY, I HAVE TO DO THAT BY DOING LESS .... I LOVE IT

Perhaps that's just a limited belief we have It's not that it's easy or hard, I think, perhaps it's more we have been conditioned to suppress our authentic selves, and we have to be aware of that and take effort to re-condition ourselves, by being both critical and accepting of ourselves (paradox, but that's what we work with). For some people it will be difficult and for some it will be hard, it depends on their paradigm, and how they are changing their paradigm (moving towards dissolving it, of course).

@Lynnel I'd what makes the real difference is the manner in which one approaches ANYTHING that makes it "fuck you in the ass" or not. I don't know enough to say there for sure ARE and AREN'T people who can be writers, though I have met a few writers who aren't doing it with much thought, who haven't looked within themselves and realize weather or not they actually want to do it. However, if there is an authentic drive to create, then one ALWAYS has the potential to create.

8/28 Didn’t post this yesterday, but that’s because I was so busy yesterday getting so much done! I woke up yesterday, and immediately got to work, and I didn’t force myself to either, I just felt the natural drives and followed them. I got a lot of the menial chores done, and then I did a visualization before studying Japanese for an hour The computer crashed like three times in a row, but I didn’t feel myself get angry or worried, I just went to reading the textbook while the computer booted up. Once the computer booted up, I continued working with little to no distractions After that, my roommate woke up, we went to the University. First we did gym, but this time we started a new program, so we spent like three hours figuring everything out After that we went library to work. I spent the whole day working on company related stuff My company is growing, and I’m excited to take on more responsibility, but in order to do that I need to cut down on time wasters. Overall the day was awesome, I felt like I got so much done, though for every activity I did there was a problem that took like 2-3 hours, but for some reason it still felt like I was making good progress. I guess now that some of the problems are fixed, things are going to be EVEN MORE time effective. My Strategy (as of 8/28): Review of Last Week Structured Activities: In term of my structured activities last week I did not do my daily bio-energizing in the morning or gym. I however did get prepared to do the Hybrid Power Program coming Tuesday so gym should be on track. My friend and I also committed to going EVERY Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, because Monday and Fridays are iffy, so we picked three days for sure we’ll be able to go, regardless of the type of three day weekend we might have. Weaknesses: I didn’t have a problem with ego suppression, doubt, or getting pulled into deep dark feelings. I did however have a problem with social media/distractions, but that started to improve yesterday Lack of practice I realized, I realized this week, isn’t a weakness. It’s just something to get used to. My usual neuroses were still there, but I’ve been having more meditative experiences so for the most part they don’t bother me, and when they do, I’m conscious that they are my neuroses. If I ever get a strong negative feeling, I just sit in place, close my eyes, and feel it out. Countering Weaknesses: I didn’t do any of that last week. On the bright side I was noticing the weaknesses, but I still let myself get affected by them. Unstructured Time: Was distracted by social media. I honestly need to be more aware, and cut it. Structured Activities Bioenergetics (Daily) Kanji (Daily) iTalki response + learning new words (Daily) (Needs to be developed) Meditation 20min (Daily) Gym (will do Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays, following the Hybrid Power Program) Japanese Tutor (1hr, once a week) Japanese Review (once a week, for 1-2 hours) Weekly meeting with my company (Weekly) Weaknesses Distracted by Social Media (THIS WEEK’S FOCUS) Drains time, diverts focus Doubt Usual neurosis Ego Suppression Lack of practice in the habits I want to start Sometimes I get pulled down into darkness Feeling doubt, fear of death, etc Countering weaknesses Once I become aware that I am distracted, give myself 10 seconds, and then don’t look at phone/screen for 10 min Unstructured Time Make sure all my structured stuff is complete Concepts to Focus on This Week Visualization Habits to Focus On Daily Writing Session I’m not writing as much as I would like. I want to make it a daily thing, that way I can make progress Weekly Japanese Review before Tutor This should be easy to do because I can schedule to do it ahead of time Gym Maybe this week study the Hybrid Power Program, and start implementing it next week.

@Tancrede Pouyat that's why I put the "/” because I mean anyone, like you said

8/27 Overall this week went fairly well, despite having to do things like shower and laundry on campus while living in the front room of the house we’re currently staying at. Though I didn’t quite apply the strategy very well, which is fine, because like I said, I knew this week was not going to be optimal. However, this appartment issue is continuing, so I have to start pushing to get things done despite the discomfort, which will only make things easier once everything does get comfortable. This week, the videos that stood out the most to me were the Paradox of Self Trust, and the video about the Graves Model. I’m starting to see a lot of things through the lense of the Grave model and it makes sense. At first I thought of myself of a split between Orange and Green, but further self-analyzing revealed to me that there’s a chunk of me that’s still in stage blue. The parts of me in stage blue I’m have been trying to short circuit into stage green, but I can’t do that. I figure that to move certain Dogmatisms from blue to orange the mindset should change from “Everyone should be like this!” to “It doesn’t matter if other people are like this, because I will benefit greatly from being like this.” Pretty much to move parts of me that are blue to orange, I will lose the idea of greater good. ^ Anyway that’s a summary. Overall, I could use a lot of work on the strategy. I find one of my main weakness is the amount of time to kick into gear. Once I kick into gear I can get work done, but kicking into gear is what takes time, usually due to resistance I have from kicking into gear, which is probably due to distractions, falling into homeostasis of comfort, etc. Another thing is that I haven’t been focusing on one concept as much as I should have, instead I listen to 2 or 3 of Leo’s videos everyday. I guess that in itself is not bad, to get information, but I need to apply it to see benefit, and I need to start small. For some reason I don’t seem to want to start small, I want to apply so many changes immediately, but I know if I do that I would easily fall back, because I need changes to solidify to be sustainable. --- Tomorrow I will go in depth into strategy review and construction. Today I will talk about some ideas I have that I want to implement, in particular Visualization and Ruthless Effectiveness for each area of my life. I find that Visualization I can implement rather easily. I’ve already been meditating since April, and though at the time I missed a few days for the last 75 days or so I haven’t missed a day; Visualization looks pretty much the same, setting aside 20 minutes to sit and do something. The only thing is that I don’t know what in particular I want to visualize, mostly because there’s SO many different ideas I have. The Ruthless Effectiveness practice on the other hand I know which fields I want to be effective at, but the only problem is that I don’t know which one I want to prioritize. ^ I would slowly build up to being able to visualize everything and get Ruthlessly Effective at everything I want to be effective at, but right now I have to find a starting point, focus on that, and really solidify it. Areas where I want to be Ruthlessly Effective: Writing and Creating Content I want to write more and get a lot more done. I already know how to do it, I just need to do Step 3. Which in this case would be committing to writing for uninterrupted 1 hour sessions. Japanese I want to speak and read Japanese fluently This would be done by doing my daily Kanji practice (already set), working with my textbook, getting exposed to some Japanese medium where I can focus on listening or reading, AND doing my weekly tutoring session (already set). Aka: Spending 1 hour, aside from Kanji practice, on Japanese. ^ I think this would be a good start. This would pretty mean that I would set aside 2 hours of my day. I feel that this might be hard to do, but NOT because I don’t have the time. My awareness during my times of distraction has confirmed I have MORE than enough time. Another thing I want to be ruthlessly effective at is gym, increasing my physical power, mass, and general neuromuscular health. I’ve been gyming for a while, though it has been inconsistent and not as effective as it could be. That is why I bought Elliott Hulse’s Hybrid Muscle program. I need to actually implement it. My plan to do that is to build up my gym 3 days a week habit, and before gym, set sometime aside to prepare by watching the Hybrid Power Program, so I know exactly what to do that day. That’s going to take some time though, so first I will focus on setting habits for those two on top. As for visualization, what should I visualize? There’s so much that comes to mind. One thing I could visualize is my “Ideal Self”, visualizing every detail of how I want to be, physically, mentally, what I want to have around me, the feeling I want to have, and my temperament. I could do the perfect morning exercise the Leo did in his example. In order to do all that I need to optimize my time. I need to stop letting myself get distracted. There’s time for rest and relaxation, and hell, distraction cuts down on that too. The visualization exercises, I will do them for five minutes before the activities. For example, do a writing visualization before my writing session, and language learning/fluency visualization before a Japanese learning session.

@Tancrede Pouyat some examples of concepts? And stories how you've used/are using what you learned from it?

8/26 Had a conversation with a friend of mine I hadn't talked to in a few months. I will talk about the conversation later. For some reason I am stuck listening to Leo's videos For some reason I'm just sitting here, sucking up info, not even applying, because I'm too busy just listening. --- Alright now I have weaned off Off to do something productive

@Leo Gura Where can I find more material on the Clare Graves Model? In the video you made about it, you said you watched a 25 hour seminar? Did you watch it online, if so where? Thank you

8/25 Today learned about the Graves Model. Really interesting stuff. I want to learn about it more in depth.

Well, there really is no "right" or "wrong" Why would one NOT kill given that there is no death? Well, someone who has reached the awareness to "know" that, would not want to kill someone. Why kill someone? Killing someone is like an escape. Someone who is at the level of awareness to accept that the contemporary paradigm of death is not true, or rather, someone who is not bound by any paradigm of death, would know that the urge to kill someone is an unresolved issue within oneself. Inner work, comrade, inner work.

8/24 (post 2) So right now as I am figuring things out, I know that Thursday is the day where I’m going to focus a lot of Japanese. My last class that day ends at 11:45 so I will schedule the tutoring session to be from 5 - 6. In between my last class and tutoring session I will write down notes from last lesson. I will also have time to do gym in between that time too. Because Thursdays will have a lot of Japanese related Structured Activities, I will also use the unstructured time of Thursdays to look over my Study Abroad stuff and make plans to get all that in order, as there will be due dates and tasks I will have to complete. This Thursday I will make a whole planning document to organize all my Study Abroad stuff. I’m thinking for Friday’s I would leave a lot of unstructured time after noon. Mainly because some Fridays I will be heading back home for the weekend or holiday. If I’m not heading back home, I will use Friday to socialize with friends, or spend time by myself, whatever it is I feel like doing. During the weekend it will be mostly unstructured time, where I’ll deal with homework. Structured time over the weekend will be to reflect on the week, do daily practices, strategize, and also set up for the week.