UnbornTao

Perceptive awareness: the less you add to it, the more pristine it gets. Or: To the degree that you step aside is the degree of clarity your perceptive awareness gets. In other words, see what you're adding onto bare perception. Let it be as raw as possible.

We tend to overrate our own selves, giving us special importance because they're about me and mine. We like to think of ourselves as unique and special. Watch out for that.

Truth is itself. Limiting it to a model, thought, framework is silly. We could bring up the words discipline, creativity, integrity. But what are those experiences/principles really about? They aren't what the symbol aims to represent. Has presuming to be on a higher stage according to a model genuinely increased your understanding, or is it a conclusion you've made? Have you wishfully and intellectually adopted certain characteristics that are uncommon of you? Analogously, thinking about riding a bike vs riding a bike are completely different worlds. This sounds evident intellectually, but emphasis is made so that the distinction is made and sharpened on the experiential level. The focus should be on the reality of an event, condition or action, not on our ideas, preferences, assumptions and imaginations about it, whether collective or individual. When you take something stripped out of all that isn't itself, what remains in your experience? In the context of direct experience, concepts are secondary add-ons and may even be obstacles to realizing what is so now.

Not a fan of generalizing stuff. However: There's a lot of disempowering (ineffective, unhealthy) behavior done by pretty much everyone. And it isn't necessary. So I'd say no.

What about Zentered? Replace cen in related words with zen.

Framing this discussion in terms of dating is myopic, in my view. You might not be an introvert even if your self-image is consistent with that behavior. Dig it. I'm trying to point out the possibility that you might not be yourself. Therefore, you could behave in any way that is effective in interaction without thinking that it is you. It boils down to knowing yourself at all levels, metaphysically and personality-wise. Is an actor who plays a role being himself? I'm saying that how we show up to the world is through a character, and that it is existentially unreal.

@undeather @undeather Fair points

What does it mean to be oneself? First, I'd assume you'd have to know what a self is. That would free your consciousness from your current confusion, taking yourself to be you. Getting who you are frees your self. You grasp that it isn't you, but a persona you've crafted mostly throughout childhood. This matter is fundamentally about authenticity.

@undeather You can tell where someone is coming from just by listening and paying attention to their communication. You could use the same logic with dictators, or ruthless liars. Sounds like nonsense, but intuition may play a role in assessing what someone's like. It's intelligent and holistic. Not perfect though. Would you need to know the life of a X (ruthless manipulator, etc) before deciding whether to relate or listen to them? In your experience, for example, you already make decisions of this kind when it comes to who to socialize with, among many others.

Interesting question to contemplate on your own. Don't limit it to the context of dating, or even relationships. I think this issue is about the principle of authenticity. What does it mean to be oneself? In your experience, there are times when you assess you haven't been authentic. Why? What have you done that didn't arise naturally in you? Etc. It's not acting out every impulse that arises in you.

What principles are effective when it comes to becoming conscious and having insights? What is one to do? A lot of thinking, thus intellect, seems to be pointless. In the end, what has it allowed you to become conscious of? Has it really increased your understanding? Most of the time it's rather superficial when each of us is focused on convincing others of our preconceptions. That occurs often. Sometimes we don't want to listen, although we may not acknowledge that. That turns into an exchange of opinions and beliefs.

Social and culture are held as real. You assume they're "out there," somehow existing as a fact or a reality. They're not! They're held by minds. In other words, the social world and culture are being imagined by individuals. Stop imagining them and they disappear, so to speak. Take a look take a look take a look Consider the shift in perspective that grasping this experientially would have on you.

Trying (and failing) to locate pain. What is it? Where is it? How does it arise? First, bodily sensations. When pain takes the form of stress, there might be constricted and shallow breathing, tight muscles and tense body overall. But pain doesn't seem to reside within these sensations themselves. Where is it? What is it doing? Why does it exist? I'm starting to suspect that pain is heavily influenced by me. It may even be of my own making! However, that is extrapolation. As such, it should be dropped. To be sincere, I don't know yet. Then, look into thoughts. "Negative" thoughts of various kinds -- fearful, angry, anxious, envious, depressed -- may be held while experiencing pain. Pleasure may also paradoxically be involved, both forming a dynamic. Do thoughts cause pain? Dig it.

I'd say there's study, contemplation and practice. All three together can be called inquiry or research. @Leo Gura Study gives you the fertile ground for contemplation.

Show me a mind.

Really easy and comfortable to fall into that model, especially for "spiritual" people. I'd try to listen to the individual and his communications while taking the model lightly. Great guy imo. Intelligent and authentic from what I've gleaned from his books and talks. Also you might be confusing using the same words with talking about the same things. Don't readily assume that teachers who use similar words are talking about the same thing.

That question stems from your curiosity. Wonder and want to know. Identify your assumptions and beliefs as such. That will open up the door.

What is implied by the nature of something doesn't need to be reassessed in expression by complements or qualifiers. It's redundant: Biased judging Wise discernment Aware intelligence Mindful presence Additional complement Different distinction Fear about the future Honest communication Think of your own examples.

Contemplation and existential thinking demand always starting from scratch, that is, without assuming anything about the object of inquiry. It has to be independent from your study and so-called knowledge. In order to do that, your relationship towards beliefs needs to be changed. Concurrent with that, identifying assumptions is essential. It's a key aspect of contemplation. Genuine investigation starts with not-knowing, otherwise it becomes an attempt to validate preconceptions.

The search for truth and the search for comfort aren't compatible. It is inappropriate to base your search for truth on the search for comfort and pleasure.

The Trap of Pretending Say you learn a new model on human growth, and you take it up as an operative conceptual framework. You adopt the model superficially, as a system of belief. Said model stipulates that being non-judgmental is a highly evolved characteristic. What happens in your experience? You may suppress certain emotions such as anger, adopt particular roles that fit your self-image, etc. By pretending to be X, you believe you've somehow made progress and changed in a significant way. I disagree. Consider the Buddha: he didn't repress his impulses. We can imagine that how he behaved wasn't enforced as a discipline but rather arose naturally out of profound understanding and awakenings. Yet, we try to manufacture growth by faking traits that don't arise authentically in us as a result of personal understanding. Remember that pretension is antithetical to this work, and it doesn't help. Watch out for this dynamic. We can fool ourselves in similar ways. Ask yourself: Does this behavior arise naturally for me, or am I manipulating myself? To summarize, be increasingly authentic and continuously move towards that direction.

What is vitality? Yesterday morning I woke up unusually early. Walking with the dog, there was an experience/emergence of joy, presence, vulnerability, deep happiness. Out of that, I wondered: What is aliveness? What occurs in your experience so that you feel alive, as opposed to struggling to survive? Vitality seems to involve your whole presence, openness, and vulnerability to the point where it might become deeply unsettling and uncomfortable when around others. You've got to allow yourself to be completely in the moment, without pretension or acting. Being vulnerable exhibits courage and is required in order to be present. It also seems to cause or involve the principle of self-expansion.

Communicating demands accurate language and expression. Listening demands presence, and the intent to grasp another's experience as it is, that is, without any distortion on your part.

Always assume you're fooling yourself. Ask: How am I deceiving myself? It can be subtle and gross. The key is to become aware of how your mind easily fools you. This will help you mature.

It's a film guys. Don't fantasize about watching TV increasing your consciousness.