Zane

WHOA!!!!!!!!! I just finished "The Power of Meaning" and this final epigraph resonated with me. "That's the power of meaning. It's not some gret revelation. It's passing to say hi to a newspaper vendor and reaching out to someone feeling down. It's helping people get in better shape and being a good parent or mentor. It's sitting in awe beneath a starry night sky and going to a prayer service. It's opening a coffee shop for struggling veterans. It's listening to a loved one's story. It's taking care of a plant. These may be humble acts on their own. But taken together, they light up the world." There's just something so profoundly simple!! I realize that I spent late 2014 to now, to discovering not just cheap thrills or entertainment, but a sense of passion and purpose. I've started noticing the simple beauty of nature and savored it, I talk to baristas and Uber drivers and even befriended a barista and tore down the barrier of awkwardness, I started re-connecting to my exuberance, I started dating to kindred spirits, but most importantly, i'm creating a passion project inspired by my deepest passions including an all-encompassing fictional universe with the oddly creepy and whimsical feel of 1980s Tim Burton and I discovered a kindred spirit who embraces my passion equally and celebrates it with me. Reading all these books feels like a crystal clear realization of what I'm seeking, what I'm achieving and what I'm capable of. I'm realizing that I'm discovering my path to greatness!!!!

Why am I investing time in reading all these books on the topic of passion, "The Last Lecture," and finding meaning? I notice that reading the books on passion are revealing more insights and the key insight I'm gaining is that I'm discovering my authentic self and finding my element. "The Last Lecture" profoundly resonated with me and even almost brought me to tears because it focused on childhood dreams and the lingering of death. I feel as though I'm undergoing a new existential crisis where I'm realizing the progress I'm making in my self-actualization but I feel like I'm capable of so much more. I have some uncertainty because I might be moving to a new state to start a new job and I feel like the greatest change is on the horizon. I created a Twenties Journal to reclaim the lost happiness and that was my soul's voice. It led me to discover new passions and it felt rejuvenating. It made me a self-starter intrinsically motivated to discover, realize and to create joy. My Twenties Journal was kind of an inner entrepreneurial project focusing on re-discovering myself. The potential move to a new state could be the revolution I've deeply longed for!! I'm at an exciting moment on the horizon!!! It's been making me contemplative and even more eager to dig deeper and learn more.

Recently, I've been becoming more Existential. I'm 23 years old and I've spent 3 years re-creating myself by reclaiming the natural joy and spontaneity of childhood, being mindful of synchronities and happiness in the moment, preparing for the future, and being purpose-driven and vision-driven but recently, I've been contemplating deeper topics. I've been reading "The Last Lecture" and "Die Empty" and there's something in these books that profoundly resonates with me. '"The Last Lecture" focuses on a professor diagnosed with a terminal illness and giving his final speech about childhood dreams and loving life. There's something about that book that hits me deep! I realized that the way i've been living my life is to re-connect with childhood dreams and my whole childhood. It's as though I'm digging up my old toys from the closet and realizing the nostalgia and joy it gave me. I've been connecting with friends who have this deeply sensitive and nostalgic side. What the book made me realize is that I'm embodying a Carpe Diem attitude because I will die someday. "Die Empty" is about the joy of work and creating work that is deeply authentic to your spirit before you die so you don't have any regrets. Could my stories and poems I'm writing be a sign that I'm preparing to die empty? I focused on a Twenties Journal to focus on creating my happiness and live an authentic life. I'm grateful for that early quarter life crisis I had when I was 19. Maybe I'm reading all these books on manifesting dreams, intention, life purpose and callings, the Hero's Journey, and watching Actualized.org as a way to discover deeper meaning. I also have a strong hunch that my life is going to change radically within a few weeks but for the better. Sorry if i'm a bit rambly! This realization is fresh!

Thank you!!!!!!! How are you dealing with Existentialism?

Musings on Meaning, Death, and Legacy Recently, I've been becoming more Existential. I'm 23 years old and I've spent 3 years re-creating myself by reclaiming the natural joy and spontaneity of childhood, being mindful of synchronities and happiness in the moment, preparing for the future, and being purpose-driven and vision-driven but recently, I've been contemplating deeper topics. I've been reading "The Last Lecture" and "Die Empty" and there's something in these books that profoundly resonates with me. '"The Last Lecture" focuses on a professor diagnosed with a terminal illness and giving his final speech about childhood dreams and loving life. There's something about that book that hits me deep! I realized that the way i've been living my life is to re-connect with childhood dreams and my whole childhood. It's as though I'm digging up my old toys from the closet and realizing the nostalgia and joy it gave me. I've been connecting with friends who have this deeply sensitive and nostalgic side. What the book made me realize is that I'm embodying a Carpe Diem attitude because I will die someday. "Die Empty" is about the joy of work and creating work that is deeply authentic to your spirit before you die so you don't have any regrets. Could my stories and poems I'm writing be a sign that I'm preparing to die empty? I focused on a Twenties Journal to focus on creating my happiness and live an authentic life. I'm grateful for that early quarter life crisis I had when I was 19. Maybe I'm reading all these books on manifesting dreams, intention, life purpose and callings, the Hero's Journey, and watching Actualized.org as a way to discover deeper meaning. I also have a strong hunch that my life is going to change radically within a few weeks but for the better. Sorry if i'm a bit rambly! This realization is fresh!

Metaphors are one of my deepest passions to learn about! It's amazing how deep and multifaceted metaphors can be!!

Walking the Way I'm starting to educate myself about Taoism and what fascinates me about Taoism is the concept of how you are everything and flow where work feels effortless without forcing it. I would LOVE to focus on applying Taoism particularly effortless action to creativity and to living my life where I feel like i'm in deep flow.

Ilusion of Success So I just watched Leo's video on how paradoxically pursuing success makes you even more miserable and how it radically departs from happiness in the moment. I've spent 2014 to 2017 reclaiming childlike happiness and re-connecting with the passion, simple pleasures, and going back to my original purpose so I can re-discover myself. I tasted that deep bliss twice in San Francisco while sitting on a pier and in the park and feeling this deep joy surge through me. It was because "the moment was golden." I feel like that's been my new mantra "the moment is golden!" However, I also want to focus more on pursuing authentic success that's aligned with the authentic self's desires. I proposed the idea of Purpose Driven Hedonism which is focused on how pursuing pleasure aligned with authentic desires maximizes happiness. I returned to the state of childhood happiness.

A well lived life is highly subjective but I've been pondering the question. To me, a well-lived life is self-created and self-defined. I see a well-lived life as a life focused on discovering and expressing your potential. It's realizing and acting on your deepest desires! It's a life that's lived in flow state where time just flows by and you're hooked on a feeling of energetic passion or deep bliss. It's discovering AMAZING possibiltities! It's you realizing "I have freedom over my life and I can create my own life."

Spiritual Experiences I'm beginning to learn about spirituality but I have a growing interest with spiritual experiences. Flow states, peak experiences, divine inspiration, lucid dreams, Shamanic visions, trance states, bliss and ecstacy, Tantra, the Tao, having numinous emotions, self-discovery and self-realization is deeply fascinating to me. It feels like I'm tasting and catching brief glimpses of these experiences but I want to deepen these experiences and deeply ground them in my life. For example, sometimes, while meditating, I feel deeply relaxed and undisturbed. When writing, I can go into a flow state and words pour from me. While cuddling, I felt a deep sense of union and this deep bliss. Holding a girl's hand felt so warm and in that moment, the moment was magic. I want to craft a strategy and go on my own journey to practically apply spiritual experiences in my own life but without relying on religion or scriptures. I feel like i'm reclaiming something deeply emotional! Like i'm fulfilling a deep longing! I feel like my journey will focus on a middle path without going too hardcore with mortifcation of the flesh, or torturing myself, a vow of poverty, or starving myself. I want to achieve these experiences because they fascinate me and so I can experience such profound and staggering emotions or experiences. I feel like I deeply desire authenticity!

I'm beginning to learn about spirituality but I have a growing interest with spiritual experiences. Flow states, peak experiences, divine inspiration, lucid dreams, Shamanic visions, trance states, bliss and ecstacy, Tantra, the Tao, having numinous emotions, self-discovery and self-realization is deeply fascinating to me. It feels like I'm tasting and catching brief glimpses of these experiences but I want to deepen these experiences and deeply ground them in my life. For example, sometimes, while meditating, I feel deeply relaxed and undisturbed. When writing, I can go into a flow state and words pour from me. While cuddling, I felt a deep sense of union and this deep bliss. Holding a girl's hand felt so warm and in that moment, the moment was magic. I want to craft a strategy and go on my own journey to practically apply spiritual experiences in my own life but without relying on religion or scriptures. I feel like i'm reclaiming something deeply emotional! Like i'm fulfilling a deep longing! I feel like my journey will focus on a middle path without going too hardcore with mortifcation of the flesh, or torturing myself, a vow of poverty, or starving myself. I want to achieve these experiences because they fascinate me and so I can experience such profound and staggering emotions or experiences. I feel like I deeply desire authenticity!

I'm asexual yet yesterday, I looked at a book on tantra and the subject peaked my curiosity. What fascinates me about tantra is finding the deep intimacy and the union of souls and the emotional ecstacy of it. My mind is intrigued by this possibility. I had a Tantric experience while cuddling a girl on my bed and it felt so deeply relaxing and almost mystical. It felt like this flow state and I felt like I had this natural charisma being expressed. Regarding tantra, I want to learn more deeply about it and focus on applying it in my life but finding a way to apply it to my asexuality. I'm also discovering how I have a natural charisma and gravitate towards eccentrics and people on the Autism Spectrum. Tantra feels like a crystal clear insight by combining intimacy with ecstacy. I'm focusing on seeking out AMAZING experiences that leave you buzzing and vibrating with ecstacy or where you're overwhelmed with laughter and childlike bliss.

I love the self-honesty in this post and how upfront you are about your inner demons. Honestly, my worst fear is be dark, twisted, and be so deeply pessimistic and a victim who denies myself freedom. However, you say that you feel no positives but you do have school, your guitar, your therapist, and your running. The great news is that all of those can make life worth living! Guitar is a great sign because it can start as a hobby, evolve into an outlet, but it can become something profoundly meaningful. You can recreate your life! However, it will be a hard and painful journey but it will be rewarding!

I'm deeply experienced by flow states and peak experiences in self-actualization and I would LOVE Leo to film a video about exploring those states of being deep in flow or awe or deep creative states and examples and types of those peak experiences and how they can be achieved and make it your new normal.

This is a fascinating topic to consider regarding communication! It seems like being an asshole with a blunt approach can have it's benefits and disadvantages. Being an asshole can reveal truths about society and how we can be so mired in complacency. A firebrand approach intimidates us and reveals how sensitive and weak we became. The asshole approach can be the most direct approach! However, EVERY technique can have it's weaknesses! The asshole approach could be dogmatic because it seems to assume that ALL people need a harsh approach or they're "too sensitive or whiny." The asshole approach could be demoralizing and only repel people even more. The asshole approach could also be completely outdated and too conservative and ignores the complexities of the situation and puts the blame on "laziness." Politeness can also be a major trap because of how it relies on sugarcoating, passive aggression and weasel words and it's not genuine because it focuses on protecting feelings rather than expressing yourself. I'm always seeking out outlets for self-expression and that's why I heavily use storytelling and poetry to convey myself raw and authentically. Taking on a Jester approach could be a new approach where you use comedy to communicate your points! In post-truth times, we need radical honesty more than anything and we need to listen to the jesters who cut through the bullshit. A great example of the asshole approach is in Donald Trump who claims to be a brutally honest straight shooter who "speaks his mind" but he spreads lies, false promises, and bile. He's just more direct rather than discrete about it! Trump can dish it out but can't take and blows everything up into feuds.

Observing My Dating Strategy Why did i get five dates with this girl? Why do i attract eccentrics? What is the method to my madness? I'm piecing the puzzle together and i'm realizing that a variety of factors go into it. I apply strategic thinking, authenticity to my dating approach, inner game, and spontaneity. Regarding dating strategy, there's a lot of factors at play. For my dating profile, I observe how A LOT of guys focus on conveying dominance and power. They have pictures of flexing their bodies! I want to create an air of mystery and intrigue so I diversify my pics. Instead of flexing pics or gym pics, I have a pic of me walking on the beach and a few of me cuddling my cat. For my description, I make my intentions crystal clear and state exactly what I want. I also go into depth rather than being vague and surface level. My profile is focusing on an air of mystery and also captivating attention and subverting dating cliches. I focus on embracing my geek side with pop culture references! For the girls, I choose my girls deliberately by carefully observing profiles and crafting the best messages! i still feel a tad approach anxiety and i come across profiles that hit me in the gut. I notice how i still feel approach anxiety and I think a new technique would be to go with my gut, write the message and hit send. I challenged myself to message profiles that intrigue me without approach anxiety and that resulted in five dates with one girl. Regarding dates, I deliberately ask for scheduling and choose a great locale like a bookstore or coffeeshop rather than the club scene. When I arrive at the date, i focus on making my arrival and presence theatrical by leaping in and bursting with a natural enthusiasm that says "I'M READY FOR FUN!!!!!!!" In one date, my date greeted me with an attack hug and under the alias "Puddin." When the dates happen, i focus on setting the scene by exploring the bookstore and discovering my date's interests. It's a non-verbal communication! I don't bring flowers or chocolates! I focus on unconventional topics such as childhood, imagination, stories, and movies and how they relate to it. I also play up the enthusiasm and spontaneously become a variety of characters! Some are put off by it but some love it because it creates a sense of humor and a willingness and eagerness to break the mold and it creates a sense of intrigue. For my five dates, I focused on building them up from exploring bookstores, to exploring the city and the zoo, to exploring her workplace and having a dance party with a playlist based on our favorite songs, and the fifth date culminating in a play that she would deeply love. Taking her to the theater revealed my authentic self fully and i tapped into my date's deepest passions. She also hugged me several times! I realize that my strategy and techniques combine a variety of approaches yet it defies the traditions of classic dating and modern dating and it creates a new approach to dating that values authenticity and genuine friendship and discovering passions and self-discovery! My dating approach is based around being deliberately selective rather than blindly choose any girl. I seek out an introvert or an artist or a blatantly eccentric girl with an edginess and a quirkiness to her!! I focus on crafting a witty message devoid of pickup lines or "hey" "sup" or "hey sexy." I also focus on giving killer and genuine compliments. I stir curiosity and excitement with my passion. I focus on making my dates an opportunity to bond and to pick our minds and I give tests of character like character imitations and wild enthusiasm. I also focus on appealing to my date's passions to get her excited. During my very first date, i cuddled with my date and she got deeply in flow with Harley Quinn and i became her Puddin both figuratively and literally. She surprised the hell out of me!!! My dating approach seems to be the Jester Approach focusing on using comedy, passion, fascination, and eccentricity and crafting an identity and playing that character but also being authentic! It's an alternative to the Nice Guy/Asshole or Alpha/Beta dichotomy. I'm focusing on being the guy who fascinates you and leaves an impression that makes you desire more! I'm playing the Court Jester, the Charismatic Eccentric, the Energetic Childlike Spirit, and the Free Spirit and the Alpha Male Eccentric (the guy who fully embraces his eccentricity like a badge and doesn't give a fuck) I'm trying to figure out the method to my madness and I'm excited where this takes me! I realize that my dating approach taps deeply into my authentic self!! The unapologetic geek who focuses on using his passion to provoke people with his odd sense of humor and his passions and who gets people fascinated and who learns more deeply about people!! My approach is a combination of mastering seduction and socializing, discovering and embracing my authentic self, motivating myself to take action and being a self-starter, having a distinctive brand and marketing approach, but self-discovery is the main core to my approach!!

My Fifth Date LAST NIGHT WAS THE BEST NIGHT EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I took my date to my favorite theater to see "Hunchback" and IT WAS AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This was my fifth date with this girl and what made it so great was that I introduced her to one of my deepest passions and she observed how profound an effect this theater had on me and she felt my passion. I noticed how by the end of the show, I was so charged with passion, that i applauded the loudest!!! IT FELT CATHARTIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My date absorbed that passion!!! Before the show, we were talking casually about folk music and dragons. I noticed how we can take odd topics like movies and make them into a deeper discussion about our passions. I realize how deep we can go and how authentic we can be together. When i got super energetic and excited, she encouraged it and didn't try to tyrannically control it to suppress me. She even hugged me several times. I realize how deeply we connect and it makes me want to keep making our dates EVEN MORE AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!

My Current Dating As a child and for much of my teens, I used to be that guy!! I was that awkward and unintentionally creepy guy who had no clue about boundaries, social cues, and no knowledge of dating and inner game. I would blurt out weird comments and some girls politely rejected me at best and cruelly rejected me at worst! I grew fed up with this awkwardness and I vowed "I NEED TO CHANGE!!" In late high school, that was my first breakthrough! I met this AWESOME girl in my yoga class who was highly creative and eccentric and we bonded easily. It was 2011 when we first met. In 2012, I took her prom! Flash forward 6 years and we're still in touch!! We vibe together because we're both misfits and we have a free spirit! She's that right balance of spunky, eccentric, and sarcastic which I LOVE in a woman!!! In college, I met one of my closest friends and she was in many ways, my opposite! While I was much more blatantly eccentric in a Sherlock Holmes and Johnny Depp way, she had this Zenlike mellowness and a deep kindness to her! There was something almost angel-like or sagelike about her! She was beautiful but she didn't flaunt it! She didn't conform to the modern girl and was more a classic beauty in modern times and having a quiet confidence and radiated with a glowing aura. She was a GREAT listener and she never judged or lashed out at me! Flash forward, to graduation, and we've been staying in touch consistently through Skype. During my senior year of college, i met this AWESOMELY CRAZY girl that blew my f@cking mind!!! She was a green haired roller derby girl who was supercharged with passion, chutzpah, and she embraced it with zero f@cks given!!! Her audacity was SO SEXY to me and her energy gave me so much joy!!!! I briefly dated an actress from a military background but sadly, we only had one date!! What made it not work out was our incompatibility but we did cuddle and she was the first girl to ever cuddle and kiss me and it made me feel special and like a king! We broke up but i'm not bitter or sad over it! Now, i'm seeing a new girl and on Friday, i had my fourth date and WE'RE AWESOMELY COMPATIBLE!!!!!! This is the girl i've been waiting for!!! She has a sarcastic wit, a quirky and dark sense of humor, a sexy authenticity through eccentricity, and EVEN BETTER, she's an artist and Tim Burton fan!!!!! THAT MAKES HER A KEEPER!!!!!!!! We've been to bookstores, the zoo, and her workplace at an animation studio and WE HAD AWESOME TIMES together!! We explored, had deep conversations, gushed over mutual passions together and danced to our favorite songs!!!! It's the world's greatest feeling to discover someone who shares our passions!!! I know it will get EVEN BETTER!!!!! This is just the beginning!!! Something AWESOME is on the horizon!!!!!!!!!!!! What I noticed about my dating is that my dating is entirely based on authenticity and spontaneity and defying the conventions of dating. I focus on being unapologetically authentic by embracing my quirks, eccentricity, and awkwardness instead of faking coolness. That's something sexy and underrated about being unapologetically authentic!!! Advice to Awkward Guys 1. Have a vision of your girl and your dating character. You're an actor. Have a mindset of "I AM FUCKING AWESOME!!!" The One sounds like a fantasy but there are people who discover their soul mate! It's not a pipe dream, it's a possibility! To choose the One or the Perfect Ten, you need to have a vision of her. How do you imagine her? What is meeting her like? How will you seduce her? My vision for the One is a fucking awesome woman who is deeply grounded in her authenticity and who has a deep sense of personal power and purpose. For dating, you need to recreate yourself to attract the One. My dating avatar is the Lovable Eccentric whose charisma is based around being unapologetically eccentric and is willing to be loose and uninhibited. I focus on being a fusion of the Rake and the Natural Seducer who is roguish and whose sexiness comes from his unapologetic nature. The Natural is childlike and appeals to a woman's deepest desires of reclaiming childhood. You're in control of your dating mindset! My default mindset is "this is going to be awesome!!! I just need to go with my gut and have the time of my life." My mantra is "I AM FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!" Unapologetic authenticity is such a sexy quality! 2. Mentally reframe dating and deconstruct your awkward self My former mindset regarding dating was "I'm weird, creepy, and unlovable" and a belief like that completely destroys your progress and it holds you back. That mindset creates so much approach anxiety and nothing but regret. In my past, i didn't approach some girls i thought were cute and this creates long-term regret. My new mindset is "finding a soul mate is possible! I have options! I can learn the art of seduction! I can find my soul mate! I can master seduction without pickup! I can overcome rejection fear! 3. Be fascinated by attraction and research about it through history and modern pickup advice. Choose the advice that benefits you! For example, learn about inner game and how you can master it! Learn seduction approaches or even learn about pickup. Learn about the history of seduction and the techniques of great seducers. 4. Be deliberately selective of your girl and don't randomly settle! For my girl, I have a vision of her and I focus on choosing a girl aligned with my deepest passions. 5. Question your motives for dating. Why am i really dating? I realize that one of my deepest desires is to find someone who understands me and who i can effortlessly talk to about anything no matter how weird. I want to find someone who reflects my deepest desires or my ideals! I want a great friend! The desire for love could connect to self-actualization, the desire for acceptance, and the desire for freedom!

OH MY GOD, TODAY WAS AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had my fourth date with an artist today and WOW!!!!!!!!!!! I'm supercharged with passion!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I noticed how I behave completely spontaneously and intuitvely and I act on and embrace my passions and I'm perfectly willing to be goofy and even over-the-top but I make that into my charisma. I'm defying the conventions of being the Alpha Male and the Player and even defying the Beta and Omega. I'm focusing on creating a headspace where me and my date are loose, spontaneous, and uninhibited. I never expected to get four dates and I beat my own goal of my OkCupid challenge to overcome my fear of approach anxiety and rejection. I'm focusing on discarding the conventions of dating and focusing on appealing to the inner child!! I notice how my approach to dating deviates from pickup and the the courting traditions. I'm focusing on creating an authentic and tailor-made dating approach that re-defines and defies masculinity, modern dating and attraction. I'm using online dating but i'm taking a deliberately selective approach by being crystal clear about what i want.

Fourth Date OH MY GOD, TODAY WAS AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had my fourth date with an artist today and WOW!!!!!!!!!!! I'm supercharged with passion!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I noticed how I behave completely spontaneously and intuitvely and I act on and embrace my passions and I'm perfectly willing to be goofy and even over-the-top but I make that into my charisma. I'm defying the conventions of being the Alpha Male and the Player and even defying the Beta and Omega. I'm focusing on creating a headspace where me and my date are loose, spontaneous, and uninhibited. I never expected to get four dates and I beat my own goal of my OkCupid challenge to overcome my fear of approach anxiety and rejection. I'm focusing on discarding the conventions of dating and focusing on appealing to the inner child!! I notice how my approach to dating deviates from pickup and the the courting traditions. I'm focusing on creating an authentic and tailor-made dating approach that re-defines and defies masculinity, modern dating and attraction. I'm using online dating but i'm taking a deliberately selective approach by being crystal clear about what i want. To people who are delving into dating and relationships regarding personal development, please let me know what techniques you're applying.

OH MY GOD, TODAY WAS AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had my fourth date with an artist today and WOW!!!!!!!!!!! I'm supercharged with passion!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I noticed how I behave completely spontaneously and intuitvely and I act on and embrace my passions and I'm perfectly willing to be goofy and even over-the-top but I make that into my charisma. I'm defying the conventions of being the Alpha Male and the Player and even defying the Beta and Omega. I'm focusing on creating a headspace where me and my date are loose, spontaneous, and uninhibited. I never expected to get four dates and I beat my own goal of my OkCupid challenge to overcome my fear of approach anxiety and rejection. I'm focusing on discarding the conventions of dating and focusing on appealing to the inner child!! I notice how my approach to dating deviates from pickup and the the courting traditions. I'm focusing on creating an authentic and tailor-made dating approach that re-defines and defies masculinity, modern dating and attraction. I'm using online dating but i'm taking a deliberately selective approach by being crystal clear about what i want. I abandon the desperation tactics of douchebags and Nice Guys and focus on being genuine and being motivated by friendship, mutual connection, and creating agency for both of us.

I completely understand that feeling of being an alien! I took care of it by seeking out my true friends rather than just hang out with my peers! I met people on the Autism Spectrum, Autistic creative writers, theater students, a gleefuly and lovably crazy roller derby girl, cosplayers, and i'm now dating an artist. When you seek out your true friends, you realize you're that you're not alone! Tim Burton, Neil Gaiman, and Laika's films and Synetic Theater ELIMINATED those misfit feelings!

I have a major ambition to become a teacher in Las Vegas Nevada and my progress is going well for the most part but my biggest obstacle is the Math PRAXIS Exam and I took it twice and studied heavily through it but I failed it once. Math has been a lifelong struggle for me so don't judge me and say "I don't work hard enough!" My mind is a creativity, idea-oriented, and passion and purpose-focused mind that is abstract and loves ideas, stories and metaphors and is driven by excitement and curiosity. I'm not being a victim because I've been using my resources and applying the best techniques and yet i still struggle. However, I have that burning desire to move to and live in Vegas. It's just so frustrating how one thing is holding me back!

@Liam Johnson THANKS FOR THE SHOUT OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I recently had a third date with this awesome girl and my primary strategy is Zero Fucks Given where any topic is open to discussion no matter how odd it is! It's all about being authentic and genuine without letting approach anxiety and awkwardness dominate you.

Response to Leo's Insight on Quentin Tarantino Life Purpose YOU THE MAN LEO!!!!!!!! I'm a HUGE Quentin Tarantino fan and I can identify with him deeply because of how passionate he is for films and how he's always doing his own variations on stories!! He has experimented with so many genres and yet he has a voice and style that's all his own!!! Tarnatino is a purpose-driven and vision-driven filmmaker and i've learned so much from the man. I'm a self-taught creative writer so i owe a lot to Tarantino and Tim Burton because they have a vision that is all their own.