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@Mikael89 This was MY post! I actually worded it very politely and I hope you got to read my original post because I wrote it with compassion to the guy in question! Not all women are freaking bad! Listen, I'm sorry you're hurting but women aren't the vain of your existence...it's the belief's you are holding ABOUT them that's holding you back. Let go and stop resisting and she'll show up.

@Salvijus OMG I'm going to have to agree with you! When I stopped caring about getting a bf (never had one) THEN that's were they suddenly showed up. Once you drop resistance, that's when things start happening they way you wanted I think...pretty crazy. May I ask what you mean about a spiritual woman? Very curious.

@Shaun OMG! I thought I was the only one...I have almost finished listening to part 1 AND part 2 believe me when I say this - These are one of the MOST favorite type of videos I'm always excited to view, from Leo. However this time, among the fascination, excitement and beauty...I too feel a deep sadness. I have always prided myself in being a spiritual person but something about what he shared has made me feel...so incredibly alone. I am confused, deeply. It doesn't help to already be suffering from depression and feeling THAT much more alone by feeling like...there really isn't anyone else, I guess? I don't even know how to feel about this because it's like listening to his words has left me with the notion of "who is experiencing this depression and this emotional pain right now? if it isn't me at all and it's source...that helps lift the pain somewhat but I feel empty and don't know what to think anymore". I wish I knew what to say in order to make you feel better...but maybe sharing that I am also depressed by his words and that you're not alone, might make you feel a bit better. I don't want to come across like EVERYTHING he mentioned made me feel sad or depressed but something in between the words may have triggered that for me, like yourself. For a while, I have been a very fond believer of Pantheism and although he has confirmed that's the case here as well (I was happy to hear) - there is sadly still something empty about it that saddens me somewhat. Like there's an emptiness and no purpose to everything even among the beauty and what have you...something is missing.

This may seem silly to comment as a woman but to be honest? An Alpha male should literally at LEAST not be a petty guy. No one wants an arrogant or ignorant man either. Be the best you YOU can be and do well onto others = Alpha male.

Hey Everyone! First off, a huge THANK YOU to Leo and Actualized.org for the existence of this platform and forum. For reference, I'm a Lady that's 26 and never dated before and have never been in a relationship. Sure, I have fallen in love and been heartbroken before. Recently, there's been this guy who has expressed GREAT interest in me and we have NOT met yet but he's very eager. I'm of course extremely flattered, grateful and in awe of the situation (important to note that I rarely ever get hit on in real life and online it happens more - hence this case is more so in the latter category). I want to emphasize that I really do not want to come across like I do not appreciate his efforts or his time. In fact, I'm constantly floored by his efforts to complement me and express his love and interest of me. I will be completely honest, I do not have any interest in dating at this point of my life. I had been for years, having a desire for finding love and being in a relationship. A year ago or so, I have lost all desires for love and romantic relationships. In fact, I have come to a point in my life where I'm no longer sad that I'm single and have FULLY accepted the fact that I'm single and I'm trying to embrace it humbly (instead of feeling bad about being single for 26 years ect). I'm dealing with major Depression (MDD) and at times also suicidal thoughts. I'm in Therapy (1.5 years). I'm very stressed with school life. I feel like I cannot deal with a relationship nor do I want to. I will also add that I have NOT been actively searching for a relationship and so this situation by itself - is NOT a result of me actively searching for one either. Basically, I did not want this. Long story short, since this man has expressed a great deal of interest in me...he was very very much pushing to talk to me. I caved in because I felt bad ignoring his messages (we talked here and here but since I was busy and he was too - it wasn't like we were texting live one on one and so texts were spaced out at first). Later on, I began talking to him more and more and he ever since has been...latching onto me and expressing how I'm this perfect woman to him, how everything is perfect between us and that we have lots of similarities and he has even been calling me his future wife... it's A LOT. I'm not going to lie, I feel uncomfortable and creeped out. This man has NEVER SEEN ME YET! Not to mention, has not even seen a pic of me (I was feeling creeped up and didn't sent "yet" - I'm not your wifie...). I feel smothered. I really do. And, although PART of me is extremely flattered that a guy has been calling me his future wife, I think this is a bit creepy still. He has asked me if I want kids (apparently very important to him)...I answered generally and said yes but only with the right man. And ever since I feel kinda like he wants me to have his kids and be his wifie and it's still a LOT for someone that hasn't even seen me. I would also like to add that although I respect his man I do not feel 100% like he's the right man for me as well. He deserves better than I.He deserves to have a woman in his life that actually wants to be in a relationship. I cannot be the right girl for him. I don't want to date right now. I told him straight out "I'm NOT happy. I cannot make you happy". Instead of backing off, he keeps insisting he'll make me happy. He's talking like love is 1+1 = 2 type of deal but it's not. The two sides NEED to want to be in a relationship and I seriously cannot do it ! I have been HONEST and said "I do not think I can handle a relationship right now. I'm stressed in Uni, I'm dealing with Depression...I cannot do this right now. I'm having a really hard time". I thought that was honest enough for him to back off. He keeps saying "I'll make you happier! We'll have a great life together!" ect ect...I don't want that! I really don't! I've been losing sleep over this, I'm stressed out. I've been crying all night yesterday because I'm dealing with a lot emotionally (depression) and I want to be left alone. I miss being left alone. and I KNOW this seems so silly but I sincerely cannot find it in my heart to be mean to him and block him or even ghost him at this point. I JUST talked about this situation in Therapy and my Therapist was quite firm with me and said I HAVE to establish boundaries with this man and try my best to be polite yet FIRM with him and say I'm not interested in a relationship right now ect. The moment I thought of going for it and mustering up the courage to be more firm with this man (after my Therapy session) - I get a text "You make me so happy, I feel butterflies talking to you" ect and my heart broke because I thought...I cannot possibly do this now. I feel so bad breaking this man's heart. I'm miserable in this situation BUT I'M THE ONE FEELING LIKE THE BAD GUY HERE! I have no idea why he's not getting the clue to please stop pursing me and stop pursing a relationship with me when I clearly stated that I CAN NOT DO IT...I mean, what else can I say? I realize I might not have been firm enough but gosh...he keeps saying how he wants to fix everything! (I will make you happy, I will be that man for you, I want to be your Husband, I will not make you not feel alone anymore...). Am I crazy for feeling smothered and creeped out??? Please can anyone help shed some light here and help me in thinking how can I communicate that I don't want this? Any men reading this situation - please tell me what can I say to such a man for him to finally understand that I don't want this...

@Leo Gura Thank you Leo, May I ask what are your thoughts on one that doesn't feel the need to have a romantic relationship or be in one ? I feel like that desire of mine has died (even though for most of my life, I felt like it was a desire I had and felt "normal" socially for wanting a bf/wanting romantic love). It's been a year or so since that desire has practically died/vanished and I feel very alien to others because of that. And now in a way, I can look at everything from the outside and see all this hunger and rat race that people are going through whom are desperate for love and being loved by others... I want to add that I'm a very, very friendly person and it's not so much that I never was a social person but more so that I don't want to have social interactions anymore really...much less dating or pursing a future partner. It's very odd. I feel less like a woman for it and less human because of this. It's quite heartbreaking because even if I push myself to date or go out...my heart is not really there and it all would feel like an act just to please the outside world. It would not be genuine or even wanted. I've been in Therapy for Depression for the last 1.5 years and although it helps in some aspects...I feel like my Therapist is saying that "this too shall pass" but it doesn't feel like a phase, more like "I don't see the point anymore in love/relationships" and so I am more secluded than ever (which is also an experience, solitude can be a gift too sometimes).

@outlandish I have learned from now on to be more like THIS Thank you kindly for your help and direction! This is such a mess right now and I just cannot deal with it *sigh*.

@bejapuskas Lmao don't be mean...it isn't everyday that we can get Leo's advice first up!

@bejapuskas Thank you kindly for your thoughts and your help! I appreciate it it helps even more when it's coming from a man and the male's perspective even more. It seems like I'm going to have to be more firm with him as that ever since making this post, I went back and tried being more firm and giving a better no and he seems to not get it yet, which is unfortunate. I was being honest with him and it seems like even more that I really needed to - so in terms of hiding I think I'm on the better end of things lol. I feel more suspicious of him if I'm being honest with you. Oh and i'm sorry, I would never tell him that I deserve better than him so please don't think I meant that haha - sounds mean ;P in my original post, I meant that he deserves better than I and I really mean that. Good luck on your journey! You sound like an awesome guy for sure and you deserve all the love

@Salvijus Hey there!!! Thank you kindly for your thoughts and help on my situation <33 He really is, I feel bad admitting that about him but I cannot do this anymore for sure. I already feel held back so you were RIGHT!

@now is forever Hey There!!! Thank you kindly for your thoughts on my situation - I really appreciate all the help and advice <333 I mentioned in my last post that I was trying to be more clear now but alas he got it and is still bothering me...I hate that I feel bad in hurting his feelings but this is really getting to me, I hate the situation. I told him that I'm not happy in this situation and that I cannot make him happy and it's really weighing on me...like dating REALLY shouldn't be THIS stressful! I didn't even want this to begin with, which makes it all that more annoying and uncomfortable. And you're right, a part of me feels good for all the compliment and nice words but at this point I'd rather have more peace lol. I'm going to be more firm right now as I feel like EVERYONE here really gets me! It seems like this whole thing is off because if everyone gets me apart from him..it's really him that's the problem I feel like. On your last point - you were correct - he didn't believe me *sigh*. At this point, my ego has had enough that's for sure btw - love your avatar! awesome color choice and combo.

@Vito C Hey there!!! Thank you kindly for your thoughts and advice - I REALLY appreciate it. I forgot to update the post but basically, I did my best to say what what was recommended here (maybe not firmly enough, it seems) and he kinda backed off romantically but not REALLY so...he's now basically all "we'll get to know one another as friends! and then be bf and gf!" to which I'm just all ugh...I can't with this right now. You're right, this is over the top falling in love...with all due respect to him and everything. I'm so sorry about your friend! That sounds horrible and just reading it made me uneasy. I sincerely hope she's being safe!

@Leo Gura OMG LEO!!!!! I'm really honored that you got to read my post and had taken the time to reply and help me with my situation! - THANK YOU SO MUCH. I've been a subbie on your youtube channel for YEARS and just finished your very recent vid "What Is God? - A No Bullshit Explanation For Smart People - Part 1" and I was very moved and highly intrigued. Wonderful work, as always! You're right, I really do not have to go into justifications as I do...I can attest that that's a flaw of mine at times (over explaining, over justifying things instead of being comfortable with just letting the truth shine through and letting it just BE). You're correct, I don't owe him a thing in that regards. Thank you kindly for offering up a polite response - I'll try using that! Oh and about your side note - First off, thank you for your perspective and help. Not going to lie, reading that hit me pretty hard haha. I found it very interesting that you knew, without me really ever mentioning it - that I would prefer to be as "perfect" as I can, before I venture out into dating. You were VERY spot on. Sharp. I'll try to remember your advice! You're right, at this point in my life I am pretty closed off to people (by choice) and so I can see that it might have an impact that's greater than I thought. Hopefully I'll be lucky to find a man I like one day. Thank you again for all that you do, you're doing amazing things for mankind <333 Much love.

@Emerald Ohhh I see you lol! Thanks for sharing btw - subbed on your youtube channel! You're awesome!

@Toby Lol ! I mean, I don't know if you're just joking or not but I got lost as to how that would help haha...maybe help get him off my back, kinda? scare him off? Which btw, so funny as a side note.

@Emerald Hey there! First off, thank you kindly for taking the time to read my post and sharing your thoughts. I really appreciate it Oh I know exactly what you mean...it's true, I have not been in a relationship but immediately I sensed that something is at LEAST off here. I mean, it's too much too soon and too intense, for sure !! So you're very much correct - this is NOT normal. Your words have strengthened my gut feeling that things are deeper/creepier than they seem - So thank you for pointing that out for me, especially. The thing is, he's also someone that's not been in a relationship before...he's 31, I forgot to add that opps. I know that's pretty out there - especially for a guy and I was also surprised by that fact (not that I'm disrespecting the fact, just saying). There's something about him that makes me feel like, he's pressuring himself and me to do things too fast - "when can we meet? when can we start OUR LIFE TOGETHER?" and so much more...I cannot even begin to tell you how stressful all this is. Like dude, CHILL!! Thank you for your advice...I'm going to have to be more firm with him because this is causing me way too much stress and it's not okay. I feel harassed with the "love" and I don't want to feel this way Love and dating shouldn't be THIS stressful - especially in these "early stages" so I'm going to have to figure this out and soon *sigh* Thanks again !

@Shadowraix Hey there! First off, thank you kindly for taking the time to read my post and sharing your thoughts. I really appreciate it; especially it coming from a man's/male perspective. I think you're very much right...I feel like he'll be hurt either way and I truly never really wanted to hurt him but I see how it may happen now whether I want it or not. Although I appreciate his feelings for me and feel grateful that someone even wants me in that way, I see now how being more blunt would probably be the better route since you said that he might come up with more reasons in order to counteract my points... I'm just soo used to being the one on the other side that gets hurt and so this is so new to me (doing the "hurting") but at the end of the day, he deserves better and I know it. Thank you for your help !!

Hey Everyone! I would greatly appreciate any and all thoughts about my situation and on the topic. For reference sake, I'm a Lady in her Mid 20's + (26), a virgin, been suffering from severe depression (MDD - Major Depression Disorder) and suicidal thoughts for years now. I'm very grateful to be in Therapy (for the past 1.5 years) and although it has helped in terms of emotional support (I have none other than him), I cannot help but feel like my depression has gotten worse as time has gone by. I appreciate all the efforts my Therapist has tried with me, including wanting me to try medication - but I refuse. I'm strongly against it in the sense that I feel like I hold the belief that it will NOT help me. I have never deviated from these feelings and never will. I just wanted to put it out there because this is something I do not want to put in my body. The reason I'm writing this is because I feel a deep sense of depression and dread over losing my desires. When I was a bit younger, I wanted to find love and have a Husband and hopefully kids someday with said soulmate. However, I feel deep down how those desires have died and so I feel so much less of a human. So much less of a woman. I've seen people who end up not having kids, but they STILL have amazing relationships...and, looking at myself I feel like I have lost that desire as well. -> The few reasons that it saddens me is that; 1) I've never been IN a relationship. I've been in love and heartbroken but never had the chance to experience love like a true relationship. I do feel in love & heartbroken right now over someone, because it's one of those situation where you fall in love with someone whom you feel is the perfect man that you've always wanted (and has made all the other "men" looks like little boys) the thing is - he is not only taken, but also in a situation where ever being in a relationship with him is out of the question (because of their profession). 2) I feel like losing the desire for a partner and kids...makes me feel like there's nothing to look forward to in life. I get that life ISN'T all about those things however the only other thing that interested me was building my dream career...which I'm trying to do atm but it's been so difficult with my depression and constant ongoing suicidal thoughts. I have no desire for friends anymore. I have no hobbies that are outside myself. I don't see anything else to look forward to? 3) I feel like I DO have things to offer in a relationship that can be special and unique to myself ect. However, the very thought of being in one makes me feel like crying almost because I seriously cannot deal with ongoing judgment anymore. "why haven't you done anything all day? why don't you go to the gym? why isn't your body 100% model perfect?" I'm sick and tired of men like these. Depression is horrible and no one asks to be depressed. I want to be able to lay in bed, cry, not have to explain why I'm depressed and not have someone constantly criticize and judge me over it. The very thought of laying next to someone even gives me anxiety. I'm honestly devastated because I feel like one of the only things if not the only main thing keeping me alive so to speak is the desire to one day become a Therapist. It's been a dream of literally almost 12 years now and it feels like it's never going to happen. I can barely study, and there is still a long, long way to go (been in school for almost 3 YEARS now - please tell me that's not trying to make an effort?). I have lost absolutely every interest in being social with my friends and have literally gone out MAYBE 3 times in the last year plus. It does nothing for me. I don't enjoy it anymore. It makes me feel like a chore I do to make THEM happy. To make THEM laugh. When I'm out, I count the minutes till it's over. I used to be so excited to go out! - dolling up, putting on more sexy-feminine clothes and appreciating my feminine side, being glad to be a woman. Now, even putting on makeup feels like a chore just to go to Uni and try and look more put together. I'm a very, very friendly person and would never treat a stranger badly and even my Therapist has pointed out how kindly and loving I great the guards at our building however deep down I feel devastated over everything and just today was laying in bed, literally crying feeling like it's all over. Even when I'm in class, I feel suicidal and when we get breaks, I go to the bathroom and feel like my life is over. What I'm trying to say is, on the outside I'm very polite and friendly but on the inside I'm devastated. In my opinion, there is a HUGE difference between a person suffering from depression that STILL wants love and kids in their life and a person who once did but has lost all interest in things they once wanted and desired. Thank you to anyone reading this right now, I'm just in absolute tears and feeling devastated and suicidal all at once.

Hey Everyone! Hopefully I can make this not TOO long but for reference sake, I'm a 26yo Lady that's technically never been in a (romantic) relationship. I've fallen in love before, with people online (closest thing to online dating) but things have fallen short as these men have chosen to "dump" me and so the relationship could never really progress further than that. Furthermore, I've honestly never done anything with a man (nor a woman) and being a virgin, I don't think think I've even done anything other than hug a guy for a few seconds. So, never been kissed nor even held hands with a guy. I'm a VERY friendly Lady and men have always said how pleasant, understanding, mature and deep I am. I know I'm not socially awkward at all and people find it very odd that I've never been in a romantic relationship, much less done anything sexually. Personally, I know I'm a heterosexual woman and so I admire, desire, feel attracted to and know I want men in general. I've just never been in a relationship in real life because well...no one has ever bothered to date me nor has anyone openly been interested in me tbh. So, never been asked out on a date much less had a chance to. As you can imagine, all of this has led me to harbor feelings in my life and has led me to a point where to be honest? the very thought of being in relationship or getting married (as much as I would love to) - makes me recoil emotionally and physically. I keep feeling odd like I'me SO used to being ALONE and never in a relationship that the very thought of it seems...bizarre to me. Like, the very thought of sleeping next to someone (like a normal married couple!) makes me almost nauseous and I cannot even imagine how I'd be able to, because I'm so used to sleeping on my own. It's crazy thoughts like this that further my depression because...on the one hand it's saddening to be alone but on the other,I feel almost like I'd have anxiety about simple things like this. And, I cannot even fathom even being able to hold a relationship during school right now, which is kinda sad because it's very normal to try and juggle both ect. I know deep down inside, I'm a romantic Lady and have always been spiritual and believe in soul mates ect, so having these feelings really is quite disheartening tbh. As a side note, I've been dealing with MDD (major depression disorder) for the longest time and so emotionally, I've been having a hard time with constant suicidal thoughts as well. Luckily, I'm in Therapy for over a year now but sadly feel like I've honestly fallen in love with my Therapist. It seems crazy, because I know he is not perfect but my heart breaks because I feel like he's the most wholesome man I've ever met and cannot help but think how I'd love him/someone like him as a partner. Obviously, I fully respect the boundaries and would never do anything to over step them. It's just that I find myself flustered at times, and I always try and dress nicely, put on makeup and perfume and feel all giddy and in love when I'm around him at our sessions. And naturally, thinking about relationships I also think about children - I grew up thinking children are natural and normal and as a little girl loved playing "house" and being the "mother" and literally all my life was very nonchalant about kids "oh of course I'd have children" but recently all this depression has made me feel like it's too overwhelming to have kids and I'd need the RIGHT partner for this huge decision...and my thoughts just go to these deep and dark places like, there's no going back from having kids and I'd feel stuck and cannot "kill myself" because that would be too "cruel". It's all a mess. I guess what I'm trying to ask is...this even normal to feel this way? I feel SO left out of what everyone one gets to experience with love and romantic relationships and feel heartbroken of being in love with my Therapist at the same time. I feel odd feeling this way about kids as I've mentioned and the very thoughts of ever being in a relationship seems like a distant dream. Is it weird that I feel like I've been single "too long" to the point where like I mentioned, even sleeping next to someone makes me feel sick deep in the pit of my stomach and so anxious? Would love to hear your thoughts !

@d0ornokey Lol thank you for the suggestion I appreciate it. Personally, I think there are too many crazies out there to trust Tinder and people sometimes have bad intentions... I'm not looking for a one night stand haha.

@aurum Hey there ! First off, thank you for your thoughts - I apprecaite it ! I mean, I'll be honest - apart from 1 time (that happened aboard and with a non-English speaking man), I've just honestly never been hit on or flirted with face to face. It has kinda led me to feel like I guess I'm no one's type or something...I know it seems like there's a "story" but there isn't at all, it's literally just years of "not getting flirted with" and years of no man ever being interesting enough in me to ask me out. I know this is 2018, women can make the first move and at times I have but things have fallen short what with the man being taken, not straight ect. It's silly because it's not like there's 30 men just waiting to date me in real life...there's literally no one. So, there's no chance to ever go out on a date and get to know people who are "genuinely interested in me"...if that makes sense. I agree ! For sure very different than the normal Lady my age. Thank you though for your compassion I appreciate it <3 hmm...I'll be frank when I was younger, a relationship was something I VERY much wanted but being at this age, somehow...the desire has fizzled out. It's filled more so with depression and the feeling of being suffocated and not 'free" if I were to suddenly be in a relationship, somehow. idk why I've had a 180 about this, especially never being in one before (despite being in love). In an alternate and ideal world, if I could "date" my Therapist...I would in a heartbeat. But obviously, that will never happen and can never happen and so I'm kinda left with "meh" feelings about the notion of relationships in general which tbh is pretty alarming for me, considering it's something I had wanted literally all my life...hence why I thought it was best to share my feelings and gauge how much they may be odd or not. What action am I willing to take? nothing at this point to be honest...because I can do everything in the world to "find" men to date but what's the point if I feel this way in general right? hence my odd distress and need to ask all this haha.

Hello Everyone ! Like I always start, I wanted to give my thanks to Leo Gura for ALL of his amazing work and for the existence of this forum for people like myself who can express themselves freely and for any and all topics involved on all of the other boards. I've sent quite a few posts in the pasts regarding how I feel about my depression and suicidal thoughts in general and more specifically regarding certain things and so for the sake of not over cluttering the board, I just really want to share what's been weighing heavy on my heart for a while now. I've noticed this is especially as a woman, if that's important to anyone or rather even to other women reading this right now. I've been depressed for many years now and have been recently suffering from MMD (Major Depression Disorder), not medicated (I refuse) and I feel like my suicidal thoughts have been over the roof, literally lasting from sunrise till sundown, for weeks on end without any relief whatsoever. I think this has especially weighed heavily on my outlook on life as result. In my heart of hearts, I feel like I'm not only alone in the world, not only alone in the universe but as though I am alone in existence and it's a horrible and isolating feeling. For reference sake, I'm an undergraduate student trying to study in order to build a career as Therapist/work In the Clinical mental health field and I'm 26, a female that's single and never had a bf/partner in my life. The thing that's weighing heavy on my heart, is that I feel like I somehow don't really belong anywhere in my life path. I feel like I'm trying SO hard to go through school and trying to study my dream major (even though at this point I'd never get to my dream career/job at all whatsoever), but the depression and suicidal thoughts have taken over everything at this point. I have so many years of school left as a result and by the time I'd be done with school, trying to build a career in my field will take time and I'd start around the age of 33 really, based on my calculations, I feel like. And somehow magically in the middle of this all, a healthy minded woman is supposed to find the man of her dreams and try and build a family/have kids by at least 35, because anything over that age is starting to risk fertility. Mind you, I feel like I was ALWAYS for kids all my life and now just the thought of ever getting pregnant makes me feel like my life would be over in a sense. And, I feel like women try so hard to make a life for themselves, including trying to build their own career, only to toss it away for a family that's maybe unplanned ect. To be honest, I think I'd be devastated if I'd have to toss my whole life's work of school and my career. I know children are a blessing and I am by no means trying to undermine Mothers because I think it's the hardest job there is. I am just weighed on my soul with the thought that, if i'm struggling SO hard with school and trying to build a career and the thought of being a stay at home mom makes me feel so incredibly depressed to the point of maybe I'd rather off myself...then WHAT exactly does a woman have left, you know? I'm not saying being a stay at home mom is NOT okay, I feel glad for woman who feel like that's what they want and that's what they strive for and that it brings them joy. I'm just saying that if I were to be in that position, I think that I'd feel incredibly disappointed in myself, unfulfilled and over all perpetually depressed even more. On the other hand, the thought of choosing a career over family and relationships doesn't sound like the healthy route either because I've never been in a relationship and being 26 already, you can imagine how much I've missed in terms of that and truth be told that has always made me feel different than many people. No one really wants to feel rejected like that, I've never felt like I was ever enough for any man out there. I've been in love and heartbroken and it really does suck. At this point, I don't feel pretty enough, thin enough, intelligent enough and accomplished enough for anyone. I feel like the bar has been set so high at this day and age. On top of everything, I feel constantly stressed over school and the pressure to try and work hard in order to try and get into graduate school, which even that feels next to impossible with feeling suicidal every single day. It's like, everyone is good enough other than myself. Hence why I feel like I have no place in the world. So all in all, what can a woman do really? Blending the two (career + family) is possibly impossible, but yet choosing one thing over the other is a whole other issue. I don't think I can express how incredibly disappointed, heartbroken I am over this because it has been something that has fallen upon me as woman especially after being in my mid-20's. I don't think we women sometimes realize how NARROW and small the time frame we have in order to study, build a career, somehow find the perfect man and partner, build a family and literally do it all. I realize all of this may be over the top but I cannot begin to express how upset I am over this whole issue. At the same time, I also feel this deep upset and disappointment in general like...is this really all there is to life? Especially as a Woman? Just to be a Mother and house wife? or just to be career driven and that's it? is this all? Maybe this is the depression speaking, but something in me doesn't see the point in a relationship and building a family for some reason (only recently this dawned on me). At the same time, I'm struggling to do the opposite and study and try to build a career. It's like I don't belong on any end of the spectrum, you know? Hopefully all of this is making some sense. All of this, has led me to feel even more suicidal because I feel like I have no place in the world and that although life sometimes has it's way of magically working itself out, I don't know how any of this can get better or how to begin to see things in a more rational way other than this. I'd appreciate your thoughts on my situation! Thank you to everyone <3

@CuteCornDog Thank you for your compassion ! I feel like somehow it helps even more, coming from a guy

@Feel Good Hey There ! First of all I would like to give my thanks for your reply and the time you took to read everything and try and help <3 I appreciate it ! You're right, I'm probably over thinking things too much as it is really. I think at times I could try and take my thoughts less seriously, but it's hard because it feels like a weight crushing down on me and my outlook on life in general, I bet. I think seeing everyone else function and actually make a living and be alright with themselves has weighed down on me because I feel like my whole day is filled with constant suicidal thoughts and feelings, making it hard to enjoy my time. I realize that everyone's life is different of course and that not everyone needs to be on the same path and that it's okay. I think in my mind, I had a perfect plan about how I wished things would go (not even anything THAT crazy imo nor perfect) and seeing how even that is hard to manage and do, I think that's where my depression has stemmed probably. You're right though, I probably have time to work things out...maybe I'm just taking things too hard as a woman. I should do better in terms of diet and exercise though yes! Thank you for your perspective and ALL your wonderful tips ! I appreciate it.

That hit me really hard and it's devastating to hear to be honest... I've felt like that, especially being depressed and suffering from suicidal thoughts and what you said really hit me on a deeper level.