Raphael

How to Increase Brain Power? Hey there, I'm trying to improve my brain power. I recently started to eat a bit less, I notably reduced my quantity of rice and I noticed that it cleared my mind a lot. I also did some work to release past traumas and it reduced many of my negative thoughts. I would just like to know if you guys have advices to improve my mind and my ability to focus and have clear thoughts. I'm not only looking for healthy food but anything that has an impact on the mind: food, traumas, kind of physical activity, the external environment, etc. I personally currently eat mostly healthy, exercise a bit every day, and try to sleep well (when my mind isn't too crazy). By the way here is how I'm planning to eat for the next month: Breakfast: a smoothie consisting of half an avocado, blueberries, and a date. I will also add some oats 10:00 AM Break: a small mix of fruits (apple and oranges) with some almonds and cashew nuts Lunch: average portion of rice + Eggs or Fish + 2 vegetables + Kiwi 04:00 PM Break: : a small mix of fruits (apple and oranges) with some almonds and cashew nuts Dinner: a small portion of rice + Some Grains (peas, chickpeas, lentils) + 2 vegetables + black chocolate Cheers.

Damn... I've always been blown away by how many similarities I have with Leo. Sometimes I feel like I'm the one speaking at the camera. I especially resonated with him when he mentioned his difficulties to fit in because of his different cultural baggage and the difficulties that his family had with money.

The example that I had in my family was so bad that it motivated me to do the complete opposite.

Independence I lived alone by myself from the end of 2015 to the end of 2019. At the end of 2019, I started freelancing to get financially independent. I decided to move back to my parent's house because having a full-time job and doing more web development aside was too much for me. However, the previous work experiences that I had crushed down my self-esteem very badly to the point where it lead to panic attacks and me feeling like a slave to people's desire because otherwise I would get highly being diminished. Because of these self-esteem issues freelancing has been hell and I got exploited and abused by clients. My situation started to get better during the end of 2020 at the same time where my self-esteem started to go up again. However, even if my situation is better and I made good money recently, I'm still living with my parents and I'm really started to get sick of it. I don't like being treated like a 10 years kid who doesn't know anything in life. I want my independence back. My mental health is getting better and better and I think that I will be able to clear all the work-related traumas soon so that work doesn't feel painful anymore, but blissful as it was for me some years ago. Nevertheless, freelancing as I do is uncertain in the long term, I work on small projects and clients come and go randomly. This is what happened this month. What I need is to find a stable client with which I can work for at least the next 6 months for max 10 hours/week and who pays well. Therefore I will feel more secure and will not have to worry about clients disappearing, nor will I have to spend time searching for clients each month. It will allow me to rent a small isolated office in my area where I would be able to work without having to deal with the toxicity at the house and all the noises all day, however, I will still sleep here and give a bit of help because my parents are old and need a bit of help notably with the animals. The time that I will get will also allow me to work on my main project. I have been procrastinating too much, it's time to launch this business. The purpose of this business will be my own survival, it will not be the most conscious business, nor the lowest conscious, but will be an important piece of my financial infrastructure and a stepping stone towards advanced self-actualization. I don't want to be like my dad and have a random job where clients come and disappear randomly and I certainly don't want to constantly live in the fear of not having money. I often hear people saying that I'm young and that I have time... this advice doesn't work well for me and the opposite doesn't work well too because it stresses me out. My time as a human being is limited and needs to be used wisely, I don't want to live most of my life with the fear of not having money. I want to build my financial infrastructure as fast as possible. But, I need to build a proper system, I need to care about myself, I need to be kind with myself, I need to love myself, I need to be healthy, and when doing the things that I need to do, I need to go at my own pace and take time to do things properly in order to avoid making mistakes that would backfire. Time is a duality, it doesn't exist and it exists and the same time. Taking time to do things properly and having a limited lifetime are two sides to the same coin. It just needs to be balanced. I will be a millionaire within the next 5 years.

Holistic Work Ethic Work ethic is holistic. I have been dealing with a lot of difficult thoughts in the past that affected my ability to focus until things started to get better recently. I did some forgiveness to release past traumas and started to have less and less difficult thoughts. A few days ago I started to eat less, I notably reduced my quantity of rice and I noticed that it reduced the monkey mind a lot. I intuitively felt that there was a connection between digestion and thoughts. When I eat a lot my intestines works a lot and it results in thoughts storms, when I eat less my intestines works less, I feel lighter, my mind feels much more clearer and my ability to focus is better. I also feel less and less the need to cope by using social media, reading the news, or watching porn, and it feels great. The attitude of pushing through it even if it's difficult is unhealthy stage orange. It works when someone is healthy: eat healthy, exercise properly, don't have any huge traumatic baggage. The people who aren't highly healthy and who are able to do that have incredible willpower and even if they have incredible willpower, their work is most of the time not the best quality work. Being healthy and having a powerful system is simpler and more rewarding than pushing through it like an animal.

I think I lost hope with people, I don't expect that much from them anymore. Most people only have short term vision and always try to drag the few conscious ones into stupidity. Of course, none of us are perfect... but what always baffles me is that very few people actually try to improve and just stay stuck projecting beliefs and biases. And even if they try to improve, I never met anyone who was willing to question its entire existence and tackle down all its biases and beliefs. I can't really expect this as most people don't even have developed an healthy ego... including me... but of course they are degrees to this. I noticed that I lack some elements at all survival oriented stages: beige, purple, red, blue, orange, and green, but at the same time I consider that I do better than average. So... I'm better than average, but not the best and i still have many things to improve... and this fine I'm where I am, and the healthy attitude is to embrace it and continue the work.

25/04/2021 (Week 13) If any of what I wrote this week is true, it might be helpful if I... find a small isolated office to work respect the rules that I set for my life work without noises cut toxic people cut my dad maintain a proactive positive attitude in life have a problem-solving mindset decide to enjoy the now work with intense focus take full responsibility to improve my self-esteem accept my current self-esteem push through difficulties

Weekly Statistics (19 April 2021 - 25 April 2021) Total Working Time 22 hours 34 minutes Average Focus 3.41 / 5

25 April 2021 Wake Up Time: 07:24 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 10:50 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ✅ Stretching after waking up ✅ Cold shower after waking up ~ No social media until 7 PM (Doesn't apply on Sunday) ❌ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: No work for today Average Focus: ~ / 5 (objective at least 3.5 / 5) Total Work Duration: 0 minutes, including 0 minutes of Deep Work (objective 0 minutes) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes)

I agree. I agree again. I don't aspire to be working 60h+ / week, I'm astonished by people who do that even when they are no physical survival necessities. Yeah, I think I probably lack a bit of stamina. How much do you work by the way?

Exploring Racial Biases: Understanding Differences of Development Sometimes I think about why are some areas of the world more developed than others and try to understand the causes. Here is the ultimate answer: They are no ultimate answer to these questions. This is how it is. Trying to understand that keeps us stuck in the mind and entertain difficult emotions. And this answer is the ultimate answer. Here's how an argumentation would go: Why is this place so under developed? Because people don't have that many resources. Why people don't have that many resources? Because they have been exploited by other people in the past and these people looted all the resources. How is it that these people looted all the resources? Because they were evil and violent, and because the people here didn't have any possibility to fight back. Why they didn't have any possibility to fight back? Because they didn't have the same technology. Why they didn't have the same technology? Because the natural environment was already less favorable and they have to deal with common natural disasters. Why do they have to deal with common natural disasters? Because this is an area where the winds can be very strong multiple times per year. Why the winds can be very strong? Why the earth do that at this specific place? Why the earth is formed as it is? What is the impact of the sun on this area? Why is the solar system that way? Why is our galaxy that way? Why is the universe that way? ...and it goes on and on for infinity. See? At a moment it becomes useless to try to understand and it only keeps us stuck in the mind. Being in this circle continues to entertain difficult thoughts and emotions. To start to fix these issues, understanding needs to be scaled down to not get lost in the mind and enough scaled up to have a proper meta-perspective. Reality is how it is, it doesn't mean that it always has to be the same way. With efforts, system thinking, and holistic thinking it's possible to improve the global situation, but people need to let go of their biases, develop compassion, and acknowledge that these issues aren't personal. This is just life being itself, playing with itself, suffering by itself, and trying to make itself better through trial and error.

Exploring Racial Biases: Collective White Shadow & Collective POC Trauma There is a global collective shadow within white people and many of them aren't aware of it. This shadow shows as sarcasm, jokes, and subtle assumptions. It is more difficult to see than direct insults or criticism. Of course, being too serious in life isn't healthy and it's important to have fun and some of these jokes aren't always serious and don't necessarily mean something implicit. However, it becomes a problem if it's a common behavior as it creates internalized racists shadows without people being conscious of it. It's basically a self-fulfilling circle, but they don't think of it as racism because it doesn't hurt anybody (from their perspective) and it's fun. I noticed that many white people who have friends from other backgrounds do this without being aware of the traumatic baggage behind it. My sister told me a story, she was with a white friend and it was time to move, her friend told her: "Come on slave!". She was shocked by this and I was also astonished when she told me this story. Her friend wasn't aware of the global trauma within people of color and she just thought she was making a joke. After that, her friend felt really bad for saying such a thing and then apologized. I think that this kind of situation can often happen with young white people, they just don't understand what they are doing and don't understand that they absorbed some racism from previous generations. There is a global collective trauma within people of color. Even if slavery has been abolished (but other forms of racism continue), the trauma of being oppressed is still there with many people of color. I noticed that sometimes, I saw moments where a white person would start to speak to a person of color and this person of color would start to get nervous even if the white person wasn't doing anything nor say anything offensive. I also think that many people of color have an internalized sense of inferiority because we hear so much about the west and how developed it is. I saw people of color being kinder and treating white people better than people of their own background. I have a sense that some of them feel the sense to submit, or obey, especially when I was working in an offshore company. The communications were very simple, they were afraid of speaking and often times just responding affirmatively "Ok. Ok...". I mentioned in the previous paragraph that many white people aren't conscious of the racist connotation of some of their jokes. However, I saw cases where a white person would say a joke that I didn't consider racist at all that would petrify a person of color. A case happened in my country where a white person was doing a humourous speech and made fun of the Indian accent, most people didn't saw anything racist in that (white, Indians, and others included), however, some were scandalized. After that, the guy had to explain himself to the authorities and he even made a video saying that he was sorry and that he didn't know that some jokes could hurt that much. I personally didn't saw this as racist, but I also never thought in my entire life of making fun of someone's accent and have difficulties understanding why someone would do that. My perspective is probably a bit messed up here, I think I lack understanding on collective shadows, traumas, and lack understanding on how humor works. In the end, I see multiple perspectives: A behavior will be considered as racist for the person who feels that its racist A behavior will be considered as non racist for the person who feels that its not racist On the evolutionary scale, some behaviors are just better than others for the global happiness of the specie. Implicit jokes don't help evolution towards a greater good but maintain homeostasis and shadows. Discussions need to happen within people to tackle racism and create peace The human specie is a meta organism, and this meta organism isn't aware yet and doesn't always know what is racist or not and what to do so that it can feel better and be healthier. It still doesn't know how to regulate itself in a healthy way

24/04/2021 (Week 13) If any of what I wrote this week is true, it might be helpful if I... search for a small office isolated from noises cut toxic people cut my dad from my life search for authentic open-minded friends entertain a healthy, proactive, positive attitude towards life cover my needs accept my current self-esteem take responsibility to improve my self-esteem

24 April 2021 Wake Up Time: 08:40 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 10:05 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ❌ Stretching after waking up ❌ Cold shower after waking up ✅ No social media until 7 PM (Doesn't apply on Saturday) ✅ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: No work for today Average Focus: ~ / 5 (objective at least 3.5 / 5) Total Work Duration: 0 minutes, including 0 minutes of Deep Work (objective 0 minutes) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective at least 45 minutes)

Yes, I'm an introvert. I'm personally fine coding for ~4 hours per day, however, after 4 hours I feel that I'm starting to overdo it.

@BartekD Even if it was emotionally in your case, what impact did it have on your health? Did you feel like you would explode at some point?

23/04/2021 (Week 13) If I take 5 percent more responsibility for my standard of living... I'll take more care of my body I'll try to change my environment I'll try to make more money through freelancing I'll respect my needs more I'll improve my happiness I'll do better in life I'll let go of social medias If I take 5 percent more responsibility for my choice of companions... I'll search for healthy friends I'll feel better about relationships I'll enjoy more the company of people I'll get more support in life I could be more authentic with people I'll let go of difficult people If I take 5 percent more responsibility for my personal happiness... I'll do things that makes me happy I'll cover my needs I'll let go of socials medias I'll let go of unnecessary thoughts I'll do a better in life every day I'll see my work as a pleasure I'll work better If I take 5 percent more responsibility for the level of my self-esteem... I'll accept my current self-esteem I'll work with intense focus I'll say what I want to say I'll do what I want to do I'll do things out of love my living conditions would improve my psychological condition would improve my body condition would improve

23 April 2021 Wake Up Time: 08:40 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 10:32 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ✅ Stretching after waking up ✅ Cold shower after waking up ❌ No social media until 7 PM ❌ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Deep Work Sessions: 01:18 PM - 02:51 PM I worked on Instagram scheduling Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 1 hour 33 minutes 04:45 PM - 06:14 PM I continued the work on Instagram scheduling, however I distracted myself a bit too much Focus: 3/5 Duration: 1 hour 29 minutes 08:34 PM - 09:33 PM I continued working on Instagram scheduling Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 59 minutes I didn't sleep of the entire night, therefore I was tired all day and my work was very chaotic. Average Focus: 3.33 / 5 (objective at least 3.5 / 5) Total Work Duration: 4 hours 1 minute, including 4 hours 1 minute of Deep Work (objective at least 6 hours) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective at least 45 minutes)

How Can Some People Work 10+ Hours / Day? We all know these stories about people working 10, 12, 14, 16 hours per day for weeks or months. I personally don't understand how something like this is humanly possible. What is the mindset behind this? How are these people able to work that much without exploding? Most of the work that I do is programming which is incredibly cognitively demanding. After 25 - 30 hours, I already feel tired. I pushed it sometimes in the past, however after 40 hours, it becomes too much for me.

Wow, that's an awesome explanation, thank you! So... the key thing about systems thinking is being able to consider many causations and interconnecting them rather than being focused on one single cause?

Exploring Racial Biases: This ... Person Have you ever said something like this: This black guy This black girl This white guy This white girl This arab guy This arab girl This Brazilian guy This Brazilian girl This ... guy This ... girl Why did you do it? If you ever said something similar, that's a sign that you need to inspect your biases. Have you absorbed that from your environment? Did you felt oppressed by some people? Did some people hurt you and you ended up stereotyping? Was it justified or not? Do you have some resentment against some group? In all cases, whether it was small, subtle, or intense, you have some shadow work to do.

Exploring Racial Biases: Noticing Races & Racism of Dad I always saw my dad obsessed with people's ethnicity. For any person, he asks: "What kind of person is this? Black? White? Indian?". When watching the TV, he always looks at people faces and says things like: "That's a black", "That's a Chinese", "That's a Madras", "That a white", "That's a fucking [INSERT ETHNICITY]", "That's a [INSERT ETHNICITY] shitass", "[INSERT ETHNICITY] is a shitty race", "All these people are [INSERT EXTREMELY VIOLENT INSULT]". He is obsessed with people's ethnicity, he often says extremely racist things about almost everybody. This is worst than racism to this point, this is hate of anybody, one day he said that we need to kill all homosexuals and that we also need to beat women. I'm sick of this nonsense. I never cared about people's background most of my life, however, I saw myself noticing a bit more ethnicities in recent years and just thinking: "Oh, that's a ...". I might have absorbed a few tiny bits from my dad here.

Exploring Racial Biases: Biases Vs. Real Social Problems People who have a huge cultural identity often feel threatened by this. Sometimes a critic of a culture isn't racism, but the acknowledgment of a real social problem. Examples: Obesity in the United-States The condition of women in Indian Racism in China etc. All of these are real social problems that need to be addressed. I think that all cultures need conscious criticism and deconstruction, and the actualized.org forum is the perfect place to have these discussions.

That's the thing about my situation, white people are a privileged minority where I live so they developed mostly at stage orange/low green where the rest of the population is mostly at stage blue. Therefore my experience with them has overall been much better than with other groups or with my family. I never got threatened by a white person, no white person ever threw rocks at my dogs or tried to beat them where it happened a lot with people of color. However, I'm conscious that my experience is partial and I guess that it would have been different if I lived most of my life in a white majority country. I got a few questions and some subtle racism while living in Europe, my sister also told me one day that she got insulted by a man while she was standing in the street, the man said full of hate: "BITCH!". I can imagine how difficult it can be to be a person of color living in a white majority country and getting hate and threats just for existing as a human being.

22/04/2021 (Week 13) If I take 5 percent more responsibility for my standard of living... I'll try to find a separate office I'll sleep more I'll work without noises I'll do better in life I won't accept mediocrity I'll raise my standards If I take 5 percent more responsibility for my choice of companions... I'll spend time with more open-minded people I'll be more able to express myself I'll be able to be more authentic around people I'll finally have great relationships I'll enjoy people a bit more I'll get more satisfaction from my relationships If I take 5 percent more responsibility for my personal happiness... my happiness would increase I would be more motivated to do what I want to do I'll be more enthusiastic I'll do things that make me happy I'll let go of unnecessary thoughts I'll let go of distractions and would be more in the now If I take 5 percent more responsibility for the level of my self-esteem... I'll accept my level of self-esteem I'll be OK with where I am on the self-esteem scale I'll increase my self-esteem a bit more every day I'll work with intense focus I'll say what I want to say I'll focus more on myself I'll do better in life